[mongrel]

username. mongrel

name. desdemona
gender. mare (she / her)
magick. fire

playlist.

✧ crust punk queen
✧ fluorescent adolescent
✧ tobacco sunburst
✧ alien blues
✧ what once was
✧ you don't know the truth

[mongrel]

childhood (0 - 11).

she was born to mother ariadne and father lysander, who hoped that her fiery excitement even as a newborn filly wouldn’t prove to be a preview of her personality as she continued to grow. after their firstborn son, they hoped for a quiet little girl who could bond with her well-mannered mother in traditionally feminine activities involving flowers and baking and learning to sing.

her older brother, mercurio, was shaping up to be a stellar young stallion. he had just entered into a well-respected career of nobility, with the expectation that he would become a great general who would bring enough success and recognition to the name of their family that they would be pleased with a more timid presence in the household.

unfortunately for them, their assumptions for a perfect pony of a daughter couldn’t be more wrong.

desdemona came into the world in explosive, dramatic fashion, up and running in only a couple of hours. instinctually quick to test everything that came her way, she was full of curious snorts and was quick to strike a hoof at anything that had the potential to be exciting.

she expressed no interest in her mother’s floral arrangements, and had no understanding of the whole “stop and smell the roses” philosophy. to her, there was no time to stand around in the kitchen and bake sweet treats for the local festivals, especially when she could be spending that time thundering around and causing whatever havok she deemed fun instead. there was no love for soft, high voices that could sing beautiful hymns at the church; her appreciation for music was expressed through as much noise as possible, picking up the drums and spending ages sounding absolutely abhorrent as a result before she learned what rhythm was at the grand age of nine - much to the relief of her parents and the entire neighborhood, of course.

she was incredibly eager to show off her new knowledge to her parents, but they always seemed preoccupied. whether it was an impressive advancement in drumming or the first few, beginning sparks of fire, they only seemed to offer her a polite smile and the occasional praise. even when she was able to hold a small, aggressively pink flame for the first time, they were quick to return to their duties after a small fuss over her newly developing magick.

the next time she could muster up a flame, she didn’t rush to show them.

[mongrel]

adolescence (12 - 16).

as she grew older, desdemona began to realize that her parents didn’t like her. they loved her, sure, but they never loved her in the same way that they loved her brother.

by the time she was a young teenager, mercurio had achieved his status of a noble guard after years upon years of rigorous training. his name and face had become familiar to the general public of their area, and he would often be enthusiastically greeted by neighbors, coworkers and townspeople alike. he’d turned out to be everything ariadne and lysander had hoped he would be.

his younger sister was familiar to many as well, but for very different reasons. as a result of the lack of attention she received from her parents, desdemona began to lash out. as a teenager, she became increasingly disagreeable and quick to anger, and it wasn’t unlikely that she would disappear into the night for a few days at a time after a particularly harsh argument.

during these times, she began to get involved in circles of young delinquents in similar situations to herself. admittedly, many others were far worse off than she was, but they welcomed her with more recognition than she had ever gotten from her family. within these circles was where desdemona made her first friends that were more than neighborhood foals and childhood acquaintances. with these friends came influence.

though it went against the morals her brother had worked so hard to raise her with, petty crime was a common pastime within groups such as hers. it was unavoidable, and desdemona would go to almost any lengths out of a desire to please her newfound friends - this often left her to do the most within their circle, and this extended exposure to crime desentized her to it. as it became more normal to her, she questioned the morality of her actions less. of course, it wasn’t anything very extreme - the most she had ever done were acts of arson, pushed by her friends to engulf small objects or abandoned equipment in powerful pink flame - but she was lucky that mercurio caught her early on. she didn’t realize that at the time, and spat insults at him as fiery as her own magick as he arrested her, but others in that same group wouldn’t turn out to be so lucky to be able to escape, or be forced out of, that vicious cycle of crime.

now, what mercurio did after this arrest could be considered morally gray. many, especially those who knew of her, were of the belief that desdemona shouldn’t have been rewarded, as it is typically seen, for such despicable, rebellious teenage behavior. if you had asked mercurio, he would’ve agreed, but he would’ve also argued that it wasn’t a reward. it was simply because he had no other ideas for what he could do to help her. he claimed that if he had let her off with a slap on the hoof, desdemona would’ve gone right back to it. no matter how many times another pony would argue him over the topic, he’d leave them with a question that was something along the lines of “what would be the point in punishment if that only pushed her to anger even more?”

if that didn’t make them at the very least stop and think, if not drop the argument altogether, mercurio was stubborn enough to keep it up until they did.

that stubborn streak was always something they shared.

a pair of ponies had been walking, one after the other, for a decent while. there wasn’t much sound between the two other than the shuffle of their hooves and the ruffle of their membranous wings tucked against their flanks.

they’d began their trek across the kingdom when the sun was just reaching the middle of the sky. now, it had started to dip down, and the longer they walked, the more irritated the smaller one became. she’d asked why the other insisted on walking when they had such strong, able wings and could clear the distance in half the time, but he gave her no response. it only frustrated her further.

“where are you taking me?” a young, angry desdemona demanded of her brother, who walked only a couple steps ahead of her. she wore no shackles, and wasn’t followed by any guards, but she trailed after him even without restraint. as bitter as she was, she wasn’t stupid. and she knew him. he wouldn’t bring her anywhere terrible, so she had no reason to run.

a few seconds passed, counted by the four-beat of their hooves.

“mercurio.”

“keep talking and i’ll take you to prison,” the older one responded without so much as a glance back at her. his tone was cold, and the way he spoke implied that his tolerance for her normal teenage shenanigans was already six feet under.

…which, she supposed, was understandable. she had almost reduced an entire neighborhood to smoldering, pink ash last night. probably not the wisest decision, but surely not… prison?

had she heard that correctly?

“you’re not serious, right?” she asked, the slightest panic in her voice. “you’re not actually going to let me go to prison, right? mercurio, tell me you’re joking.”

“i said shut up, des.”

fair enough.

it wasn’t much longer before the lunar palace came into sight. mercurio had practically no reaction to it, and only offered curt nods to his fellow guards. he’d seen it many times before - nearly every day - and the appearance of it wasn’t all that special to him anymore. his sister, on the other hand, fell back as her pace slowed to stare up at the palace’s grandeur. although she’d lived in paledon her entire life, desdemona generally tried to avoid the palaces. that only meant they were even more striking to her when she did see them, and she only dragged her gaze away from its architecture when her brother shouted her name. his tone left no room to argue, so she hurried to catch up to him, though she could’ve spent ages admiring the countless details and trying to decipher any little lunar messages the ponies who created this place years and years ago may have left in its walls.

she wanted to ask what they were doing here, but mercurio had made it clear a good few times by now to keep her mouth shut. she wasn’t terribly interested in flying laps around the kingdom or undergoing whatever other medieval torture he might have planned for her if she stepped out of line, so she kept her questions to herself.

until, of course, they approached a pair of great doors.

“is this the library?”

unfortunately for desdemona, she got no verbal confirmation from her brother, but it was to be expected at this point. any response would’ve been practically useless, though, as her answer lay right in front of her when the doors opened to reveal an absurd amount of books, stacked on countless shelves on practically every wall in the room. it was nearly overwhelming - the height of the shelves made her feel as though the books might come tumbling down onto her if she was too loud.

even more astonishing was the presence of a unicorn whose back was turned to both of them as he scanned the shelves. both ends of his tail swished against the floor as he inspected the book titles before one of his four ears flicked back towards them.

she’d never seen lunare in person, and was left in a sort of starstruck shock which rendered her unable to introduce herself. luckily for her, mercurio seemed friendly with him, and was able to speak for her.

“good afternoon, magister,” he greeted, not-so-subtly bumping desdemona’s shoulder with his own in an attempt to get her to speak for herself. “this is my younger sister, desdemona.”

apparently, much to her dismay, mercurio had already explained his reasoning for bringing his delinquent little sister into his library. fortunately for her, however, he didn’t seem to think any less of her for her admittedly very poor choices.

the couple hours the three of them spent in the library went by in a flash for desdemona, and by the time they needed to be leaving before they began to overstay their welcome, she was wishing she could spend even longer wandering down the aisles of books.

the main thing she took away from the discussions she’d had with lunare and her brother was that perhaps it wasn’t too late for her to be as successful as mercurio. even if she didn’t turn out to be a guard, those books were certainly interesting.

aside from that, though, she did learn that lunare was a lot shorter than she had ever anticipated he might be. that was a little startling.

[mongrel]

the letter (17).

unfortunately, mercurio wouldn’t be able to see that his efforts to keep desdemona on the right path did pay off.

about a month after her seventeenth birthday, desdemona’s family received a letter in the mail. it was something they never expected or could have prepared for.

normally, workers of the paledon post never approached a home directly, and simply left the weekly mail in the mailbox. that’s how she knew something wasn’t right when she opened the door to find a stocky, tired-looking pegasus standing there, waiting. she carried a single envelope, and extended it towards her with a sort of somber reluctance.

the envelope was sealed with black and violet wax, and gracefully stamped into it was a small marigold flower. such a seal was reserved exclusively for a notice of death.

her stomach stank.

she didn’t realize how long she’d been staring down at the envelope until the pegasus spoke. her voice was timid and quiet and shook a little bit, as if she was nervous to say it. “i’m sorry.”

when desdemona responded, her voice didn’t even sound like her own. “thank you.”

the door closed with a hollow thud, and the sound of her hooves dragging against the floor as she walked towards the table seemed to be the only sound in the world.

that is, until she began to cry. she almost never cried, and prided herself on being able to force tears away when she felt them, but her sobs turned into that sort of guttural, raw screaming. her parents rushed into the room at the sound, terribly confused, but that confusion quickly dissipated upon seeing the envelope lying empty on the table with a letter laying beside it.

the letter read:

“to the family of mercurio orion pruitt,

we regret to inform you of the passing of your son. he was found very early this morning, and we are currently investigating the circumstances of his death. there is not much we can say as of now; any details we currently have or will be discovering are classified while the case is under investigation. we will be doing the best we can to determine what happened, but in the meantime, please do not hesitate to contact local kingdom officiates in case there is anything that can be done to assist your family in the grieving process.

mercurio was an exceptional aid to the kingdom and an even greater stallion, and we are all incredibly sorry to hear and inform you all of his passing.

our sincerest condolences,

the high guard of the kingdom of paledon.”

[mongrel]

ambition.

if someone were to ask her why she was so determined to become a royal guard, she likely wouldn’t have one solid answer. the one she would tell any person who asked, especially those who didn’t know her very well, would be one if inspiration from lunare as a filly and an innate desire to serve her kingdom. now, that isn’t to say that that answer would be wrong, but in truth, there’s a lot more to it.

desdemona had always been one of those children that would insist on nothing but good. it was only natural for her to idolize mercurio, her kind-hearted, well-respected general of a brother, throughout her childhood, and she was determined to make something of herself the way he had. she was raised on his philosophy that, according to him, it is everyone’s duty to leave the world better than they had found it. even though he said it could be as little as donating money or baking for your neighbor, he always pushed her towards a larger goal, with the aspiration to serve paledon. as a filly, her great, big, ambitious dream was to become a royal guard - that would make him proud.

you see, mercurio wasn’t her only inspiration; the magister lunare had always fascinated her. something about the mystery surrounding him and his work was intriguing to her. the way he continued to learn each day while still remaining cool and magical was the only motivation she had to do well in school, despite her utter disdain for it.

however, her determination to do great things was lost to the angst of teenagehood, when her frustration with the lack of attention she received was expressed through anger. even when mercurio brought her to meet lunare, her childhood hero, she was still too conflicted internally to know what to do with herself.

you could talk to her for hours and end up with a tale of ambition and the duty to serve lunare, the lunar palace, the kingdom and its people, but desdemona wouldn’t give up what eats away at the back of her mind even to her closest friends. while she had been indecisive about her future after the meeting with the magister, the occurrence of mercurio’s death made her quick to make the final decision to join the guard. a month after she and her family received the letter, they still hadn’t heard much. details surrounding his death remained vague, no matter how many letters she sent to the palaces begging for any kind of answers. ultimately, the case went cold. as much as she initially didn’t want to believe it, she came to the conclusion that there was no way in hell that he died peacefully, and there was no way in hell she would let him die in vain; as much as she admired the guard, she couldn’t help but feel as though they had brushed over it all very quickly. in her mind, the only way that she could decipher what truly happened was to do it herself. this idea - that if she wanted something done she must do it herself - was something he had raised her with, so it seemed only natural.

at seventeen, she left home to pursue this renewed desire - even against her parent’s wishes.

training.

the guard training academy was hard, especially at seventeen. desdemona always knew it wouldn’t be easy to become a guard - after all, they wouldn’t let just anybody earn the right to guard the palaces and paledon as a whole - but she surely didn’t expect to struggle as much as she did.

luckily for her, both she and mercurio seemed to inherit more of their father’s genes, and she was quick to build muscle. it didn’t take long for her physique to go from one of a scrawny, lythe teenager to robust and strong. she was surely more than physically capable, and was confident in the abilities of her own body; what she had issues with, though, was learning how to use all of that muscle. she spent hours upon hours sparring with the already-established guards and her peers alike, and often ended up practicing long into the night to be able to keep up. to her, it was a matter of keeping her head down and pushing through the ache that resulted from hauling around heavy swords and pounds of armor.

as a result, she wasn’t necessarily on the lookout for potential friends. it was practically a complete turnaround from the nuisance of a pony she’d been only a few months ago, who would rather wreak havoc with friends before doing anything else.

out of everyone there, the closest friend she made was likely a pegasus who stood a good few inches above desdemona. named caliban, this pegasus had been a guard for over a decade, and had gone through the same academy, albeit that the program had changed at least a little in over ten years, alongside mercurio, who he had become very close friends with during their time working together. after guarding the palaces for years, he’d stepped back to mentor at the academy that he first learned at, where he was more than willing to welcome desdemona and take her, quite literally, under his feathered wing. he always told her it was the least he could do, and he that he couldn’t be happier to train with her personally as a favor to his late friend.

during her time at the academy, she was determined to become good enough, and even when she was good enough, she pushed to become better. while her mindset did shift, most of it wasn’t her own desire, but the need to get to a point where she felt like she was making her brother proud. with the proud, embarrassingly emotional approval of caliban, who had become like a second brother to her in the year and a half she spent training, desdemona graduated the academy to become a guard at nineteen.

since then, desdemona has dedicated her time to serving the kingdom. while her reputation was tarnished by her actions as a teen, she has slowly been rebuilding a positive public opinion of herself.

two and a half years after the guard academy, now twenty-two, she’s received another letter in the mail - fortunately, it does not bear a black and violet wax seal.

an opportunity.