noise, rarities, demos, sincerely yours, and the unfinished

[fruitvale]

uhhhh guess who was anxious n shaky but th tbought of her lovely gf made hr happy n warm inside again ? ? ( points to self ) this big ol Gaye here ! update 2 , I got a 7cups account since my old therapist was junk and probably shouldn't be a therapist . but 7cups is helping a ton and I even feel more accomplished helping others ! ! ! ! c :
also here are some memes tht i can relate 2 . . . . .

[fruitvale]

this is such a mood right now

[fruitvale]

sappy , gay me @ 10pm after not sleeping for 35 or so hrs 2 my gf 💕💕 :


i want to hold you close and let you just breathe and sleep for hours . i want to wake up at 6 am and watch fog and mist and dew glint while the sun rises slowly , and make tea before we have to Human ( tm ) . i want to stay up all night and climb trees in the woods behind my house , and curl up with my uke and let you chat the night away in my old green / orange tent . i want to be young dumb teenagers and go out late to have milkshakes , throwing around pool noodles at some dollar store with silly sunglasses and a child's hoolahoop . i want to kiss away your tears when you're feeling down again , and make sure with all that i have in my power to never let anything hurt you anymore . i want to sit in my basement and hear you play your bass to bulldog eyes with my dad's old pool table and drum set , then fall asleep on my old , worn away starry night bean bag . i want to hear you talk about all of the bugs you love and the plants you want to garden and the videogames you want to play . i want to run with you and my dogs and make fun of how my turtle loves to watch tv . i want to help stray kittens find new homes with you and name them after cute pastries . i want to cruise down the trails on bikes with you during the summer and laugh at the passerbyes in town . i want to cook something new with you and fail miserably , only to order some seafood for you and cuddle in comfy clothes watching stranger things and just talk for so , so long . i want to spend all of my extra money on gifts for you , and see your adorable smile worth all of the money in the world and more . i want to listen to low band players sing songs at a restaurant and walk home slowly with your hand in mine . i want to travel with you everywhere you'd like and listen to music all the while . i want to be by your side for as long as I possibly can .

[fruitvale]

cries at my childhood right here ; ; little dumb low qual awful clips like these were about 90 % of my day

[fruitvale]

SO A LITTLE UPDATE ; for a few months now ive had painful stomach cramps but like . they werent skating cramps bc they were in my stomach , not my intestines - and ive had a hard time eating a normal amount of food and ive had to space out eating time 2 a few hours per meal ? a few weird different diagnostics like bubbles in m stomach n overproduction of acid n slow digestion , , bt now i have to take five pills a day , , all different weird medicines , , cant have any acidic fruits , carbonation , tomato based foods , or coffee buT YOU KNOW IM STILL GONNA DRINK MY COCA COLA & BIGGBY'S COFFEE i cant help myself : w :

[fruitvale]

was bored 2day n made a moodboard based off my sona , chezter ! ! might hav 2 redo his ref , not sure - its relatively ourdated compared to how i doodle him now rip . been so unproductive skgjjdglgkd . . . . . . but i got this cute bunny poncho - hoodie thing ordered frm wish a bit ago ! ! so happy aa ! ! ! ! finishing up a lil gift i made fr my girlfriend ( anyone whos reading this : if u dont know who she is wth go lov her art and Appreciate her godly existence like i do every day ! ! ! ! ! ❤❤ )
anyways , hvil godt ! ! våkne opp oppdatert ! ! vær glad på taco dagen ! ! ! ! 🌮

[fruitvale]

tired post of me revamping some old hs trolls i made whoops

ongiri sesime - navyblood weeb nerd who uses xDD and uwu unironically , loves holographic neon clothes ; symbol is a rounded triangle with a rectangle in the top ; IN LUV w espora "" owo notice me senpai "" ; horns are thin curls that look like springs fkgkfhg , , lusus is a nine tailed fox bc why not shes a weeaboo ( poor foxmom has to deal with sailor moon cosplays )
espora taatra - berylblood boxing addict that loves interior design and chemistry bc Boom Science Explosions Fire , loovs birds esp owls ; symbol is two eyes on top of eachother with triangles in between them ; creeped out by giri but eventually gets killed by her oh boy ; horns r short n come out of the sides of her head with a slight curve fowards and tilted back ; eastern dragon lusus ! !
colkez adyeem - mapmaking history geek but quiet and slightly sociopathically desperate , insomniac whod marry a plant if he wanted tbh ; symbol is a swirly compass in a rose shape with the north pin pointing south ; would actually die fr wren , th kid of mine ; one horn pointing straight up & the other is nearly the same but a bit longer and curved only at the top like a tree almost , he hangs his glasses n notes there smtimes ; lusus is a SNEK ( anaconda ) ! ! ! ! !
reeses otheno ( i hAD to with the name ok ) - lemonblooded lazy game - obsessed Actual Cat whos religion is bad cat pun novelty tees and 2012 memes , spits on u from afar hiss ; symbol is just a big Aa in comic sans with one " * " at the end for """ the aesthetic """ ; aint got no luv what u talking abt ; horns are in a loop aiming out and curving in only on the very top of their head kinda like a sphynx ; speaking of , their lusus is this odd egyptian cat dad cultist that encourages their strange antisocialness
keskos etrieh - plumblooded active modern n trendy mtf biker whos actually kind of good at social media but bad with people on it , vulnerable / gullible , loves fresh slime videos and vlogs / asmr / rip vines ; symbol is a wheel on a lil camera instead of the lens ; dating maks ! ! alien + kid smooches ; horns are on the top / side evenly and jut in , nearly touching , and cut outwards quickly like a 7 nearly ; lusus is a samoyed - fish
gordon ramsay < -- the reject / inside joke troll

and the two trolls that i mainly draw n think abt / hav the most development heck ! ! def erasta bewulf , had tht kangaroo child since the Beginning tm , n the good ferret hoarder victus boivin ! ! may edit in the fankids i made but u get th point i need 2 redo lots o m chars

[fruitvale]

can i get a uhhhhhhh functioning digestive system
the entire inside of my arm is bruised bc the doctors tried 2 get blood drawn n They Failed On Both Arms ; ; n its not evn the outside , just purple n blue all near my veins h e c k . . . . . . got m nose cauterized the second time too , but they messed up n dripped the silver nitrate everywhere on my nose n burnt the entire inside which made everything worse ? ?
thanks , dude
um i might not b able 2 do normal spring break stuff™ like visiting new orleans bc of this n it just . Hurts to move n eat , theyre not even sure wth this is ? ? eh , , , , im cool w just sitting here n drawing with darwin deez / tally hall / pink guy or joji on repeat all day >:3c everything still hurts tho , like im being stabbed frm the inside bt W h a t e v e r

but ! ! on the bright side , igot a lot of due stuff done today ! sm presents fr my lovely adorable Amazing gf , if yr reading this harvey ilysssm dont worry about me <33

[fruitvale]

currently on vACA woohoo ! !
stomachs doing kinda better but that may just be the food that im eating or the fact that im under a bit less pressure , being away from home and avoiding making plans . went 2 the zoo n got to pet a Rly Rly big n cute owl n hold sm snakes ! ! the roads here r crazy n its so different , , , ,
gna go to the french quarter down here for a while 2morrow - already had a few pastries ( beignets , macaroons , bt nO MERINGUES CR IE S ) and eventually go check out the voodoo - ghost - cathedrals stuff some other day ! !
one day we'll probably make plans to come back with friends and i rly hope m gf 💞, i feel like shed mayb like it w all the cool airplanes n This Cool Bug Exhibit n the french quarter ? ? lov if yr readin this i s2g when we get older ill take you to anyplace you want & buy you tons of gifts & travel anywhere cool ! ! <3333 but for now alligators n turtles n shrimp n pittbulls will suffice ! !
up where i live there's abt 3 in of snow again , lightning , hail , rain , wind , etc - luckily we left before it got bad ! my cousin is basically text - screaming at me , since i got to do so much and avoid the awful storms . tho it did rain here and it flooded the street for a bit ? ? thats abt all tht happened , and anyways , it dried up after a bit and got to about 80 ° ! ! >:oc
to compensate for this odd post tho have my Beautiful ac : pc outfit , im so proud of it

[fruitvale]

i love beign sick the night before my birthday so i can't enjoy one of my few happy annual days