THEME SONG⋮⋮ SARIA’S SONG/LOST WOODS -OCARINA OF TIME─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────
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GENDER⋮⋮ CIS-FEMALE
USERNAME⋮⋮ SLYTHERIN; - 877
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PERSONALITY⋮⋮
Saria Jini seems like a confident young girl, but she’s really quite different than she seems. She’s a socially awkward kalon, with trust issues and separation anxiety. She often had a hard time making friends, since every single friend she made stabbed her in the back. They made fun of her, caused her mental and physical harm. She was in the hospital multiple times for broken limbs and ribs. Her parents often left her alone as a child, and she was avoided at school. She never learned proper social skills, and often grows way too attached to people she deems as real friends. When she has panic attacks, whether from being alone or being around people she doesn’t trust or know. She either shuts out the world and stays silent, not moving or talking. Or she cries, and moves away from everyone. She runs her own little store, nothing too big or fancy. She sells aquatic plants, and small fish and other aquatic animals. She always spots one kalon that visits regularly, and it always brightens up her day seeing the regulars that stop by to say hello or to pick up a plant or pet they ordered.
(198/200) WHAT FAULTS THEIR RELATIONSHIP HAS⋮⋮
I have a lot of panic attacks and Suiren does her best to be there for me, but sometimes - well, actually a lot lately - she hasn't. I used to tell her when I was having them and she'd get out of work as quickly as she could to come and calm me down, but the last few times, she said she couldn't get someone to cover her shift. I don't really know if she's being truthful, or if she is tired of me? I don't want to assume since she works so hard, but I can't help but wonder sometimes, ya know? So I haven't told her of the latest ones, no need to burden her. But I do still want to be in a relationship with her - she's such a calming presence and a good listener. But I just don't know.
...I’m so nervous. I should be happy, I’m going on a date with a beautiful kal. What is wrong with me? What if I mess this up? Shut up Saria Jini, you got this, nothing to worry about.
...I took a deep breath and glanced at my phone to check the time. 3:45 pm.
...She said that she’d be here at 4:00 pm, relax, she’s not late, she’s not blowing you off. Besides, she asked
me out…
...I glanced at my phone again and sighed. 3:46 pm.
...Not wanting to keep worrying, I decided to put my hands to work and cleaned a few surfaces around the shop and said hello to some of the fish.
...There was a banging at the shop door.
...“Sorry, we’re closed!” I called out.
...“Saria? It’s Suiren, I hope I’m not late?”
...My heart skipped a beat as I rushed to the front to let her in.
...“Sorry for locking you out, but you know… customers…” I trailed off.
...“Trust me, I feel that!” Suiren agreed. She jumped a little, excitedly, “Ahh! This is going to be so great!” She beamed.
...I smiled and followed her as we went and got hot dogs from a stand, eating and talking about everything: work, pets, you name it. Suiren’s presence was so calming, a welcome change. I felt like I could talk to her forever, I mused, smiling to myself.
...Next up was a trip to the aquarium that was showcasing the addition of their new dolphin show and Suiren had bought us tickets for the front row – as well as raincoats! It was a beautiful show and afterwards (while being completely soaked I might add!) we walked around watching the colorful fish swim around in the large tanks.
...Afterwards, we got ice cream and Suiren walked me back to my shop – I live on the floor above the shop.
...“I had a great time today,” Suiren said, releasing my hand so I could unlock the door.
...“I did too,” I said, smiling.
...“May I kiss you goodnight, Saria Jini?” She asked, blushing.
...I nodded, smirking and we kissed. When we pulled apart, we said goodnight and Suiren practically skipped away from the shopfront.
...“Text me when you get home, I want to know if you get home safe!” I called after her.
...“I will!” Suiren said, twirling.
...I went up to my apartment and got ready for the night. My phone vibrated and I checked it: “Got home in one piece <3 let’s do this again soon!”
...I smiled to myself,
I’m definitely looking forward to that.
(492/500)
...I’m shaking, my heart is pounding.
Crap. Not now! I think. I walk as calmly as I can manage over to the cash register and lock it. I also set out a sign that says “I’ll be back as quickly as possible!” on the counter.
...Taking a deep breath, I head upstairs to my room. As soon as I make there, the full attack hits me and I basically collapse into a ball on the floor. I can’t breathe. I’m light-headed, and my heart is basically competing in the Kentucky Derby. Pulling out my phone, I start to pull up Suiren’s contact to text her that I’m having another panic attack. “
No” is the one thought I can focus on,
She won’t make it again, you know she’s busy, stop being a stupid burden! The thoughts accelerate in my head, if they were able to slow for just one moment, I might be able to breathe. Maybe calm down – but no. They keep racing, running, sprinting. I gasp for air in an attempt to breathe normally and I feels as if I’m about to black out. I curl up tighter, trying to slow everything down, give myself something to focus on. With all my strength, I take in large breathes and exhale them slowly in order to calm myself down a little. It is starting to work a bit and after what feels like an eternity, it’s over.
...Smoothing my hair a bit and wiping my brow, I head back down to my shop There’s a small line at the checkout and I apologize profusely for the wait and check everyone out.
...I decide to close up shop a little early and start on the easy cleaning chores.
...There’s a knock on the front door and then I hear it unlock,
Oh, Suiren’s home....“Hey SJ, I’m home,” Suiren comes in with a smile and kisses my cheek. Then she takes a step back and looks me in the eyes.
...“Hun? You alright? Your skin smalls slightly of sweat and you’re a tad flushed… Did you have a panic attack today?” She asked, concerned.
...“No, I’ve just been working hard at the cleaning,” I reply, lying – not very convincingly I might add.
...Suiren gives me a look and then says: “Here, I’ll help with the mopping then, anything else you need done?”
...“No, the mopping is all I really had left after this,” I said, motioning to what I was doing.
...We both clean in silence for a little until Suiren speaks up.
...“SJ, you’d tell me if you had a panic attack, right?”
...I pause what I’m doing, “You’ve just been so busy, I don’t want to burden you.”
...She put down the mop and walked over to me, “Saria. You’d never be a burden to me.” She looked me in the eyes.
...“It’s just.. the last few times…”
...“And I am
so, so sorry,” She said firmly, “ I should have been there for you, no matter my work situation. There’s no excuse.”
...I could tell she meant it and I hugged her. We stoop there holding each other tightly.
...Suiren pulled away first and exclaimed, “I’m calling in sick tomorrow and we are focusing the whole day on you! Moves, Aquarium, Ice cream, you name it!”
...I nodded, smiling, “That sounds great.”
(555/600)