♥Crushes, Boyfriends, and Girlfriends | V6♥

[strawberry fields]

my boyfriend of almost a year just broke up with me and to say that i feel heart broken is a pretty big understatement. we have a long history, and he's been in my life for about 7-8 years now. i talk to him all day every day. we take the same course at the same college (but are in different classes). we get the same buses to and from college when our time tables meet. i'll probably see him at some point tomorrow but i know i'm going to burst into tears as soon as that happens. we've been struggling for a while and have been arguing day in and day out with each other and it's just been so hard. he went behind my back two weeks ago at a rave and did something that completely betrayed me (not cheating, i'm sure you can imagine what it is though) and i just haven't felt the same about him since. despite it all i didn't want to stop fighting to make us work because since the day we met i've always pictured my life with him by my side - but he said he was done.

i'd really like some advice on how to cope? right now i just feel like crying until i'm sick. everything feels so tainted by him - i'm wearing his clothes right now, tonight i'll sleep in my bed with all of the things he's bought me staring me in the face in my room. later on i will watch the youtubers we used to watch together curled up cuddling in his bed. i feel very lost and confused and like there's a big hole in my life.
any advice will be appreciated, thank you.

[Julia]

my boyfriend of almost a year just broke up with me and to say that i feel heart broken is a pretty big understatement. we have a long history, and he's been in my life for about 7-8 years now. i talk to him all day every day. we take the same course at the same college (but are in different classes). we get the same buses to and from college when our time tables meet. i'll probably see him at some point tomorrow but i know i'm going to burst into tears as soon as that happens. we've been struggling for a while and have been arguing day in and day out with each other and it's just been so hard. he went behind my back two weeks ago at a rave and did something that completely betrayed me (not cheating, i'm sure you can imagine what it is though) and i just haven't felt the same about him since. despite it all i didn't want to stop fighting to make us work because since the day we met i've always pictured my life with him by my side - but he said he was done.

i'd really like some advice on how to cope? right now i just feel like crying until i'm sick. everything feels so tainted by him - i'm wearing his clothes right now, tonight i'll sleep in my bed with all of the things he's bought me staring me in the face in my room. later on i will watch the youtubers we used to watch together curled up cuddling in his bed. i feel very lost and confused and like there's a big hole in my life.
any advice will be appreciated, thank you.

Are you sure that your relationship is over and there is no way to fix it? To me it sounds as if your boyfriend and you might need a break but not a breakup?

Can you take other busses to college and change courses? If it's a final breakup I'd recommend you to remove his phone number, unfriend him on social media, throw all this stuff away (or put it in a place where you don't have to see it). Make a clear cut. Don't keep pictures on your phone etc. You shouldn't be surrounded by things that remind you of him.

[WastedSpace]

i want to ask my s/o out to a homecoming dance at his school- we don't go to the same
one since i'm full-time virtual and they won't accept me there because i'm not zoned,
but i'm not quite sure how.
see, the homecoming dance allows students from other schools to come as long as
they're going with another student that attends it regularly, so another friend of mine
helped me out with that. however, i still want to see my s/o there, and the dance was
originally planned for september 11th, although due to hurricane irma it was cancelled
and moved to november. he initially didn't want to go on the first date for the following
reasons; he didn't have anything to wear, and he had already been asked by two other
girls (he didn't say yes to them, thankfully). but about a week prior (we're taking august
now) he reminded us he could go. i don't know, maybe he'd feel awkward around
the other girls who asked him? but he does have me anyway, so... i don't know.

it's been a while since then, and it's less than a month now until the dance. i wouldn't
care if he didn't wear anything fancy, honestly, i'd probably join right in if he was
concerned about that. i don't want to push him into anything, either, obviously. if he's
not comfortable i won't make him go, but we barely get to see each other at all and i
would love to be with him again. we haven't spoken on mic for a week, which is a little
rare, but again, i don't know what's going on on his end, though if anything i would feel
better asking him through voice chat rather than text.

any help is greatly appreciated, thank you so much if you went through the trouble of
reading this ;w;

Personally, I'd just tell him you want to go and ask how he feels. I personally don't understand the excuse of not wanting to go just because some other girls asked him out, but if the clothes really bother him (maybe he should ask his parents to see about getting some clothes? seems like an easy solution imo), maybe you two should set up your own dance and invite some friends. Decorate up one of your houses, download some good music, and make a fun night of it. It'd be easier to just go to the school dance, but you don't have to have a school event to do something together.

my boyfriend of almost a year just broke up with me and to say that i feel heart broken is a pretty big understatement. we have a long history, and he's been in my life for about 7-8 years now. i talk to him all day every day. we take the same course at the same college (but are in different classes). we get the same buses to and from college when our time tables meet. i'll probably see him at some point tomorrow but i know i'm going to burst into tears as soon as that happens. we've been struggling for a while and have been arguing day in and day out with each other and it's just been so hard. he went behind my back two weeks ago at a rave and did something that completely betrayed me (not cheating, i'm sure you can imagine what it is though) and i just haven't felt the same about him since. despite it all i didn't want to stop fighting to make us work because since the day we met i've always pictured my life with him by my side - but he said he was done.

i'd really like some advice on how to cope? right now i just feel like crying until i'm sick. everything feels so tainted by him - i'm wearing his clothes right now, tonight i'll sleep in my bed with all of the things he's bought me staring me in the face in my room. later on i will watch the youtubers we used to watch together curled up cuddling in his bed. i feel very lost and confused and like there's a big hole in my life.
any advice will be appreciated, thank you.

I'm so sorry. Breakups are tough, even if you've been having troubles. It's hard to see it now, but this might have actually been a good thing for you. Perhaps new opportunities will come your way that you wouldn't have thought about taking before that you can now take. Perhaps you'll make a great new friend. A lot of things could happen.

For not busting into tears when you see him, I'd suggest:
- Crying it out now before you see him tomorrow. Cry, cry, cry.
- Bring distractions tomorrow. Have in earphones. Maybe listen to angry music or a scary story.
- Pinch yourself. Give yourself something else to listen to.
- Do not make eye contact, do not approach him. Look above him and walk away from him.

And for general coping:
- Wallow now. It's okay to wallow. You need it.
- When you've cried yourself out and wallowed for a bit, do not keep yourself in the past. Do not dwell on the what ifs. No matter how much it hurts, look forward. Focus on meeting current and future goals. Purposefully push yourself to do new things - take up new hobbies, learn a new language, go new places, introduce yourself to new people. Remind yourself that you are a whole person without your ex- and you can live a wonderful life no matter who is at your side.

[WastedSpace]

is there any way to try and distinguish long-term versus temporary feelings for someone?

Time.

[mew,]

I need some help with guy troubles...
He likes me and I don't like him that way, but there is so much more to it... Can someone pm me please?

[passione]

How do I,, stop liking someone.
I like a friend of mine and I know they don't like me back in that way.
I need to shut these feelings out and stuff.
I know they'll be uncomfortable with it if they find out.

Heck.

[WastedSpace]

How do I,, stop liking someone.
I like a friend of mine and I know they don't like me back in that way.
I need to shut these feelings out and stuff.
I know they'll be uncomfortable with it if they find out.

Heck.

- Give it time and be patient with yourself. Don't beat yourself up because you're human and can't simply flip your emotions on and off.
- 'Train' your mind out of your crush by being conscious of your thoughts and actively (but privately with yourself) addressing them. When you think about how good they look, take a moment to address the thought with "yes, my friend is very good looking in an aesthetically platonic way". If you think about how much you like them, tell yourself "yes, I do like them a lot. they are a good friend of mine. We click very well as friends". Etc. And if you're just going back and forth in your mind without getting anymore, stop and take a deep breath, then focus on something else. Focus on homework or start up a conversation with your friend or put on some music you can't help but sing along with or something.

[ghostlyhamlet]

So my crush is one of my friends named (let's say D) and he's so hysterical and sweet and a prankster and I'm almost positive he doesn't feel the same way about me, because I'm a year younger and well, I'm not attractive at all.

It's just a bittersweet thing because I can tell we're bonding more and messing with each other more and he's getting more and more comfortable with me.

Another thing is that I met D early 2016/late 2015 because I had asked him to take a picture of me with the actor who plays Mimi from RENT and if he could send it to me.

Flashblack to today, we were getting Rubios before rehearsals and I heard a song from the show we saw that had the actor in it and I was like, "You know what D? I just remembered the first time I met you," and he was like, "yeah, it was when you asked me to take a picture of you with Mimi from RENT" and I was surprised he remembered that because I didn't know him back then and I mostly stuck to the shadows/sidelines in theatre.

[smairy]

So I've liked this guy for a very long time now (and this was something that I was hopelessly trying to avoid) and we are, well, we were friends then. You see, I was so so certain that he liked me; he went to the Ball with me and we used to talk and text quite a lot, I sit next to him during my free periods art school and he always looked at me everywhere I went. Then one day I guess I just confessed to him about how I feel about him and if he had the same feelings for me (this happened a few weeks ago). And yeah, he said he didn't. He was really nice about it though but asking him that really made me feel like an idiot. Ever since then I have literally been avoiding him and I feel extremely awkward around him hah, even today I was signing out at the school reception and he was standing right behind me to sign out too and I ran the hell out of there. Then I came across him again while I was walking and just completely ignored him. We used to say hi all the time but now I just don't look at him. I stopped sitting next to him during my free periods as well so I think he knows that I'm clearly upset about him.
I don't know if this is the greatest thing to be doing since he might probably think that I really hate him or something but I guess I'm just trying to forget about him until I stop liking him? I think I'm really embarrassed about the whole situation as well.
I want things to be normal between us again but my mind physically wont let me. Should I just wait things out for a while until I don't like him anymore or should I change the way I treat him now?
This whole situation seems really childish and like a typical 'crush on someone at school' situation, but in the end I'm mainly just trying to deal with my emotions. I just don't want to be having a crush on someone while I'm beginning my last year of school and while dealing with other things in my life.

[WastedSpace]

So I've liked this guy for a very long time now (and this was something that I was hopelessly trying to avoid) and we are, well, we were friends then. You see, I was so so certain that he liked me; he went to the Ball with me and we used to talk and text quite a lot, I sit next to him during my free periods art school and he always looked at me everywhere I went. Then one day I guess I just confessed to him about how I feel about him and if he had the same feelings for me (this happened a few weeks ago). And yeah, he said he didn't. He was really nice about it though but asking him that really made me feel like an idiot. Ever since then I have literally been avoiding him and I feel extremely awkward around him hah, even today I was signing out at the school reception and he was standing right behind me to sign out too and I ran the hell out of there. Then I came across him again while I was walking and just completely ignored him. We used to say hi all the time but now I just don't look at him. I stopped sitting next to him during my free periods as well so I think he knows that I'm clearly upset about him.
I don't know if this is the greatest thing to be doing since he might probably think that I really hate him or something but I guess I'm just trying to forget about him until I stop liking him? I think I'm really embarrassed about the whole situation as well.
I want things to be normal between us again but my mind physically wont let me. Should I just wait things out for a while until I don't like him anymore or should I change the way I treat him now?
This whole situation seems really childish and like a typical 'crush on someone at school' situation, but in the end I'm mainly just trying to deal with my emotions. I just don't want to be having a crush on someone while I'm beginning my last year of school and while dealing with other things in my life.

If you want to have any chance at a future friendship with him, then you definitely need to tell him why you need some space rather than just cutting him out with no explanation and then expecting him to understand once you're ready to be in the friendship again. It's fair to need time and space, but you should communicate that need to him.