Write a Letter You Cannot Send (Read the Rules!)

[casper.]

.

[April410]

I am supposed to make a list telling how to fix my life. How I'm going to make the biggest differences in your life to "fix the tree" there's a problem with how your seeing your analogy however. Trees grow to the side due to the relentless pounding of wind, the hard trials it's faced. I will accept my analogy as the tree you saw in the gardens, the trunk bent to the side instead of it going straight up. You also understand the supports that are used so that young trees don't bend in the wind like that. My problem that you don't realize or don't want to admit is that the supports are much like supports in our own life. Family is a major support that allows the young tree, the young soul, to grow straight and true. The reason why you compare me to my sister is due to the fact that she was supported properly. Loved and nurtured and when her winds came the supports for the young tree were strong enough that she was able to grow into a beautiful healthy tree, one that you are so proud of. Now you realize though that the tree next to it is crooked because while the tree's sister got the supports in the wind, the older one did not get nearly as much support and has bent in the wind. While you tell the strong tree that she could do anything you wait for the bent one to fail her first semester of college. You call me the problem. That I just "chose" to grow crooked where in reality I tried my hardest to grow straight with what I had with the support I got. And when the winds came, when I needed support, I found nothing strong enough to keep me slowly bending to the side. And now you see two trees, one straight and one crooked and blame the crooked one for the reason why it is crooked and while it is true that it it wasn't able to keep itself straight, it's because when the winds were at it's largest, when it needed the help to grow straight the supports were nowhere to be found. That tree needed those supports, especially in it's early life but it was denied with getting hurt if it didn't say or do exactly what it was supposed to. It wasn't getting supported, quite the opposite actually. And in turn it felt alone because even the fundamental supports didn't help it. It stuffed everything inside for fear of getting hurt.

Cutting branches doesn't fix a bent trunk, if you cut the wrong one in fact you might make it worse and cause it to topple over. It's grown to that. All you can do now is tend to it and hope that it's damage doesn't hurt it any further. It will always be bent unless you just chop it down completely.

Likewise I have some severe psychological damage that you don't understand. You just expect "normalcy", whatever that may be, and don't even try to understand where I'm coming from. And now that I'm much older you don't get why I'm so crooked, so out of shape and believe that it can be fixed which just a snap of the fingers. Changing who we are will take an amazing amount of time, the rest of our lives even. I'm willing to put in the work if you're willing to be patient with me. It's not going to happen overnight so please stop acting like I can just spring up into a normal, straight tree, as if I haven't gone through the life experiences I have. Please for once let the crooked tree show you the painful winds it's endured that has caused it to be so misshapen so that you can understand where that tree is truly coming from. Please look at the problem from a different angle and realize I'm trying the best I can for what I'm doing. I want to succeed but I need help.

[chon]

dear a,
missing you :'(

[Travis]

-

dear j

i wish we could go back to the way things were.
i miss you a lot, although you're right there next to me..
i love you so much it hurts.
maybe one day things will go back.

i'm sorry for hurting you.

[hamster.]

dear you,
congratulations.
you've made me cry more times than you've made me smile.
every time i asked about romance you've brushed it away.
i would love to go back to those good morning texts, but I'm afraid I'll never.
so what else to say, expect, congratulations. you ruined it.

[Happily Wrathful]

dear darkness,

and it was that day i realized the light had been calling me away from the darkness "come to me child, they only wish to use you. they don't love you i do" so as i began my journey towards the light darkness followed me poking and prodding and begging. "don't be sad darkness" i said "for you never loved me and had no feelings you only wanted to use me and darkness replied "that's not true look I've made you happy and content isn't that what you want, I've given you everything-" "but love" i replied to it "yes you gave me happiness but what else" "belonging, i made you fit in, i gave you the feeling of belonging" darkness tried desperately but not because it loved me no because it didn't want to lose "but what is belonging without love, what is belonging matter when death is near, what has belonging ever gotten me but pleasure, greed and selfishness" i replied and darkness was silent. i kept going "i want love" darkness spoke once more in hopes of keeping me from light "but you have never seen this love how can you know it's real?" but i answered "i heard it" and darkness kept going. "but your ears can deceive you" but i replied "i felt it" and darkness kept trying "but feelings can be wrong. and again i answered "I've touched it" and darkness replied "but if you can not see it how can you know it was love" and i replied "faith" and darkness fell silent again, but like an itch came back "you look tired, rest" i considered it but shook my head, "no darkness you will try to steal my soul" darkness pressed on "but i can make you comfortable " his tone was calm but strained "I'll be comfortable when i get there" i replied not stopping. "but i can give you everything you want if you just come with me" darkness tried to reach for me but hissed in pain. "i want love" and darkness never spoke to me again and i reached the light, warmth engulfed me and a voice greeted me "thank you my Child, i love you. now go spread the word that my door is open tell everyone that darkness has been defeated and you shall be blessed. and when you return you will be a queen" and i was truly happy

so dear darkness, i don't need you, i never did.

sincerely, E.
.

[ParaKitty]

Dear J,
That's better

Dear M,
I know we don't talk and that I won't even see you next year, but you're moving and ;;
heck, I was near tearing up when I heard that today. Why? I don't know. I mean we're not even friends.

Dear c,
I'm sorry, I'll try again

Dear class,
I'm just going to apologize ahead of time. ;;
I'm so sorry

[n3rvous]

dear m,
hey. i've... never seen this side of you...
but i'm glad i did. i've proved i'm confident, i confessed. i felt like i could just tell you anything at that moment... but i know i can't. now, i'll see you on monday ,,
- amy

dear k and e,
boom. i confessed to m. got a problem with that, then don't talk to me.
- amy.

[leda.]

dear nonexistent anime character,
wow i dont usually get obsessed with fictional characters but this is why i dont have relationships because anime guys make me set my expectations ridiculously high. wow if i ever find a guy who's exactly what i ever wanted in anime i swear i'll cling to him forever and we'll binge watch anime together.

[_MaddieRose_]

Dear A (lol this already sounds like PLL xD),

I know in the past you made some pretty jerk moves, but I can't help these feelings for you. My heart races whenever I come even close to you, and I don't know why. Sometimes I think that you also like me. I want you to like me. You've changed so much in the past 2 years and I never felt this way towards anybody in my life until just a month ago. You're smooth, cool, and hilarious all at the same time! When I found out we were going to the same highschool I couldn't stop the excitement inside of me. I just want you to know that I have strong feelings for you. Yes, I may be weird to a certain extent, but at least give me a chance. Give US a chance.

xo,
me.