[harlical]

My extremely-sloppy redlines. xD

I added some critique to it, too, if that's okay. I just wanted to point out a couple things so it would be easier to fix. It seems like I wrote about alot of mistakes, but there really wasn't that many since I wrote alot in each comment.

~Lunar

[quardie]

Omgz this helped a lot 8DD Thank you! 8DD

[harlical]

You're welcome! 83 I'll add your name so you can see the lines better. ^^