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username: trans
name: kiki
gender: female
what/who are they away from?:
"stay away from her, the girl with the demon's eyes."
it was a sentence that haunted you for most of your childhood. it followed you, plagued you, defined you. you werent anyone but the girl with the red eyes, the demon eyes, the eyes of the devil.
you didnt ever know your real name--you'd never had the opportunity to learn it and remember it. your parents were gone. they were here one day, and then the next, the just up and disappeared without a trace. you've been staying with your aunt ever since, taking on the name "rosalee" even if it didnt fit very well, in your opinion, and you didnt really like it. it made your aunt and uncle happy, so you were sort of okay with the name because you didnt want them to be sad.
one day, you had been playing in the rice fields, right next to the corn fields, when you'd heard the sound. the same sound you'd heard only once before.
you came to the village and found yourself unable to emotionally, mentally, and physically process what was happening.
the village had been set ablaze, by accident or on purpose you'll never know, but the screams of terror from villagers and the sickly coughs made you no more attuned to the situation than you had been seconds prior. smoke billowed from buildings like a stream of water from a broken pipe and clouded the sky, tainting the air and making the coughing sounds worse. people scrambled into the empty grass fields, going back only to rescue others who were trapped or otherwise unable to escape the burning village.
no one died, you just knew, but you still felt, somewhere in your chest, the loss of your village. and you think everyone else did too. it wasnt perfect, no, but it had been home, and now.. it wasnt. it was just.. nothing, nothing but ash and dust and smoke. rubble and debris piled higher than the tops of children's heads, and most of the village was unsalvageable.
before you knew it, everyone had turned on you, blaming the fire on you. blaming all the misfortune to befall the village squarely on your tiny shoulders.
"you! you did this!"
others joined in, their voices rising among the ashes of the village like a phoenix. your aunt stayed silent, head low and eyes locked on her hands. she said nothing to stop them, and your uncle was only more silent than she.
they would not help you. no one would help you.
so you ran. you ran while they threw stones and made threats against you if you ever came back, while others gave chase, whether to capture you and make you a sacrifice to die in the flames along with the village or to make sure you really left, you dont know, but you ran. all you had managed to take with you was your backpack, the one your parents had gotten you long ago for your birthday, and a paper boat hat that sat neatly on your head.
it wasnt long before you had ran so far you had no idea where you were, but then again, you'd never been out of the village before. they said it was a bad idea, that you could get eaten or poisoned or eaten, that they had to keep an eye on you.
well, they cant keep you cooped up now. they dont even want you.
you really only have one way to go, and that way is forward, so you better get moving.
for days, you hiked through the forest and surrounding mountains and fields and hills until you were tired and sore, and even then you didnt stop. you couldnt. you had nothing left back there, nothing left anywhere, really, and you could only move forward from this. there was no going back. you had nowhere to go back to.
when the future truly seemed dismal and you were about to give up hope, a kindly woman had found you, by some miracle you can only call it, and brought you in.
though hesitant at first, you quickly assessed she meant no harm, meant nothing more than to give you a place at least for the night, and you were not the type to look a gift horse in the mouth, so you took her offer and thanked her graciously. she was very polite and kind, very friendly too, and she always paid you attention.
it felt.. nice. when the day ended, you had expected her to leave you to freeze in the bitter cold of night, but she offered you stay at least another day, or more if you'd liked.
you were not so hesitant this time, yet still cautious. you did not know this woman, but she had shown only the utmost kindness to you and your predicament.
for at least a week, you had stayed, and you found yourself coming to a comfortable state both mentally and physically. the feeling in your head and your stomach subsided, and all that was left was the pleasant and warm feeling you got from being here.
another week goes by, and another, and you end up deciding to stay here for as long as she lets you. today, you think that day is today. you think this is it, this is the last time you'll wake up in a warm bed for a long time. she says she's got a surprise for you. you are both excited and worried about what it could be, but mostly worried. you hope she doesnt kick you out after all this time, but you also dont want to be a burden.
what actually happens if very different from what you expect. a big, fancily-decorated cake sits on the dining table, several candles (you count ten or so) adorning the frosted surface. she, the woman, has a big smile on her face, and a small wrapped box next to her on the table. there are two chairs, decorated with loosely thrown on streamers, and one has a single balloon tied to one of the arms.
"i remember you telling me it was your birthday soon a few weeks ago, and im not sure of the date, but i thought, 'hey, why not have it now?'" she says, looking a little anxious, and you, well, you dont know what to say.
you've never really celebrated your birthday before.
"happy birthday kiki." she adds warmly just when the silence is starting to get to you, and you hug her back when she leans down to hug you, and you dont think you've ever felt so much at home in your life.
you've never had a real name before either.
you could get used to it, you think.
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