[fairygutz]

sometimes, I feel that all hope is gone for me.
I feel that I always have to fake my smile.
everyone always said it would get better, but it never did.
I feel that i'm bad luck.
I always hope so, so much for good things.
they never, ever, happen though.
I don't know how i'm carrying on like this without crying every day.
actually, I would if I could.
I have to hold back my tears.
I feel like nobody cares.
I wonder how long I can keep this up every day.
I wonder when the day will come when I just can't take it anymore, when I just let all of my held back emotion out.
I bet if ten people like this, not even one person will come and say "i hope you start feeling better soon."
you know, in my world, that just doesn't happen to me.
oh, how i feel so lost.
every opportunity i have for something good to happen to me, whether it be a contest for a character to the lottery...
i always lose.
so, i wonder all the time...
what keeps me going?


the past few weeks have really crushed me. I can't think of any reason to be happy right now.
i'd appreciate it if anyone could send me a pm, maybe just something to help me out.