"Oh
Paper flowers
Oh
Paper flowers
I linger in the doorway
Of alarm clock screaming, monsters calling my name
Let me stay, where the wind will whisper to me
Where the raindrops as they're falling tell a story
In my field of paper flowers
And candy clouds of lullaby
I lie inside myself for hours
And watch my purple sky fly over me
Don't say I'm out of touch
With this rampant chaos, your reality
I know well what lies beyond my sleeping refuge
The nightmare I built my own world to escape
In my field of paper flowers
And candy clouds of lullaby
I lie inside myself for hours
And watch my purple sky fly over me
Swallowed up in the sound of my screaming
Cannot cease for the fear of silent nights
Oh how I long for the deep sleep dreaming
The goddess of imaginary light
In my field of paper flowers
And candy clouds of lullaby
I lie inside myself for hours
And watch my purple sky fly over me
Oh
Paper flowers
Oh
Paper flowers"
- Evanescence : Imaginary
i have practically no life outside of school anymore
i hate it.
i hate it
so
much.
homework takes me from the time i get home to the time i need to be getting in bed
and i still cant ever catch up in any of my classes
theres so many things i want to do but just dont have the time for
revamping X, finishing the christmas editable, doing a few touch memes for some of my characters, continuing revamping my characters, just drawing stupid stuff in general
and i just
dont
have
time
i have at least two tests tomorrow, one in science, one in health
the science one yeah i should look over the book a bit to make sure i remember contour lines and such
the health one
im just so dead
i only just caught up in math, and i still have yet to get caught up in science and health
i have an assignment due a month ago that i only just mad managed to make any real progress on
im behind another chapter in the book, and we have a new map activity that ive barely even started
and in art theres a project due tomorrow and i still have half of it to go
at least english and history are pretty easy right now
reading the drama version of the diary of anne frank and watching the patriot
band is a subject im chronically behind in so im just going to assume im currently failing band though i havent even had the time to check my grades yet
and apprently there was a spelling bee today yet i was told nothing about it and got called down to participate in one of the rounds since they were pulling the people whod signed up and the people the teachers figured were smart / good spellers and the stress made me sick to my stomach and i couldnt concentrate at all in health next hour
which was the one opportunity i had to get the study guide done
though to be fair i should be working on the study guide and 24 hour food analysis right now while i have the computer but i chose to do this instead
though i have to say im not sorry for the way i got out of the spelling bee
i misspelled "evaporation" as "evvaporation" on purpose
im just
so done
i dont even want to go to school tomorrow
i just dont think i can handle it
i wonder if i can convince my parents to let me stay home so i can finish all the assignments i have right now...
i dont think i can though
i would say i might have some sort of depression though im really not sure
its like these little fits of depression and it usually passes by the next day, or if i can distract myself enough, though i feel like thats just going to make it worse in the long run
i also suspect i have bipolar II* disorder, but i dont know
[* II is 2 for those of you not familiar with roman numerals]
some of this is just some stuff ive been needing to get off my chest for quite a long time now, but never really had the guts to say any of it
i feel a bit better now, but i know tomorrow when i look back at this tomorrow im just going to feel embarrassed, guilty, and even worse than i did before
ah hell who am i kidding
i havent even posted this yet and im already regretting this
and the irony of this whole thing is im complaining about not getting enough time after school to do what i want but i still wasted the time it takes to write up all of this when i know ill just feel worse about it later
i dont think thats how youre supposed to even
Paper flowers
Oh
Paper flowers
I linger in the doorway
Of alarm clock screaming, monsters calling my name
Let me stay, where the wind will whisper to me
Where the raindrops as they're falling tell a story
In my field of paper flowers
And candy clouds of lullaby
I lie inside myself for hours
And watch my purple sky fly over me
Don't say I'm out of touch
With this rampant chaos, your reality
I know well what lies beyond my sleeping refuge
The nightmare I built my own world to escape
In my field of paper flowers
And candy clouds of lullaby
I lie inside myself for hours
And watch my purple sky fly over me
Swallowed up in the sound of my screaming
Cannot cease for the fear of silent nights
Oh how I long for the deep sleep dreaming
The goddess of imaginary light
In my field of paper flowers
And candy clouds of lullaby
I lie inside myself for hours
And watch my purple sky fly over me
Oh
Paper flowers
Oh
Paper flowers"
- Evanescence : Imaginary
i have practically no life outside of school anymore
i hate it.
i hate it
so
much.
homework takes me from the time i get home to the time i need to be getting in bed
and i still cant ever catch up in any of my classes
theres so many things i want to do but just dont have the time for
revamping X, finishing the christmas editable, doing a few touch memes for some of my characters, continuing revamping my characters, just drawing stupid stuff in general
and i just
dont
have
time
i have at least two tests tomorrow, one in science, one in health
the science one yeah i should look over the book a bit to make sure i remember contour lines and such
the health one
im just so dead
i only just caught up in math, and i still have yet to get caught up in science and health
i have an assignment due a month ago that i only just mad managed to make any real progress on
im behind another chapter in the book, and we have a new map activity that ive barely even started
and in art theres a project due tomorrow and i still have half of it to go
at least english and history are pretty easy right now
reading the drama version of the diary of anne frank and watching the patriot
band is a subject im chronically behind in so im just going to assume im currently failing band though i havent even had the time to check my grades yet
and apprently there was a spelling bee today yet i was told nothing about it and got called down to participate in one of the rounds since they were pulling the people whod signed up and the people the teachers figured were smart / good spellers and the stress made me sick to my stomach and i couldnt concentrate at all in health next hour
which was the one opportunity i had to get the study guide done
though to be fair i should be working on the study guide and 24 hour food analysis right now while i have the computer but i chose to do this instead
though i have to say im not sorry for the way i got out of the spelling bee
i misspelled "evaporation" as "evvaporation" on purpose
im just
so done
i dont even want to go to school tomorrow
i just dont think i can handle it
i wonder if i can convince my parents to let me stay home so i can finish all the assignments i have right now...
i dont think i can though
i would say i might have some sort of depression though im really not sure
its like these little fits of depression and it usually passes by the next day, or if i can distract myself enough, though i feel like thats just going to make it worse in the long run
i also suspect i have bipolar II* disorder, but i dont know
[* II is 2 for those of you not familiar with roman numerals]
some of this is just some stuff ive been needing to get off my chest for quite a long time now, but never really had the guts to say any of it
i feel a bit better now, but i know tomorrow when i look back at this tomorrow im just going to feel embarrassed, guilty, and even worse than i did before
ah hell who am i kidding
i havent even posted this yet and im already regretting this
and the irony of this whole thing is im complaining about not getting enough time after school to do what i want but i still wasted the time it takes to write up all of this when i know ill just feel worse about it later
i dont think thats how youre supposed to even
