by Small Child » Thu Oct 03, 2013 9:58 pm
Midnight. You couldn’t sleep. It wasn’t because of the whirring of the fridge down the hall, or the glow of the arc reactor beside you. It was the guilt. The absolute black guilt that filled you.
Standing, you tried not to disturb Tony as you went to get a drink. Turning on the sink and cupping your hands beneath it, you slurped at the water. As that wasn’t making you feel any better you splashed it across your face and sighed, turning the faucet off. Standing with the water dripping past your eyes it took you a moment to realise Loki stood on the opposite side of the bench.
“Oh,” you whispered. “Can’t sleep?”
He shook his head. “I think of his hands on your stomach. It’s enough to make me vomit.” His voice had an ice edge that made you fearful. He hadn’t been like this in so long.
You sighed, irritated at yourself. “I don’t think we can do this. I… it’s not yours.” You stared at the floor, refusing to look at him for fear of his anger, or worse, sadness.
“You can’t be sure of that,” he whispered. “Not yet at least. I feel that it is mine, and I will fight for you and the child within you. Please, do not leave me. I love you.” You built up the courage to look into his eyes.
“Loki,” you whispered. “I can’t. Tony didn’t do anything wrong. I overreacted and this whole thing has been a huge mistake.”
His eyes were hurt, and it was all you could not to hug him. “But he does hurt you,” he moaned forlornly. “He does nothing kind for you. He is a pig of a human; I just wish you would see that.”
Looking down to the leaking tap, you watched each silver bead roll off the pipe and into the basin. The house resonated with its lonely dripping. “Loki…” you whispered sadly. You jumped when hands circled around your stomach, a kiss placed at your shoulder.
“Say it not, for I have heard it already. You know what I say is true. I watch what he does to you. He treats you as though you were his slave. I treat you as my equal. As my own goddess.” You shivered and turned her face to look at the roof. “The child is mine. I know it is. Why won’t you tell him?”
Sighing, you once again dropped your gaze to the tap. “Because I can’t break something which is already broken. That would destroy it.”
Chuckling darkly, Loki rested his chin on the crook of your shoulder. “His heart. You are too kind for him.” Shrugging out of his grip, you tuned to head back to your bedroom. “Oh [y/n]?” he called out to you. Turning to look at him, you couldn’t keep the irritation and sadness from your face. “You should tell him before it is too late.”
Grunting quietly, you turned and ran the rest of the way back to your room, slamming the door. Tony sat bolt upright, looking at you. “Are you okay?” he asked, half asleep as he rubbed his eye with the base of his palm. You walked slowly across the room, slinking into the bed beside him, burying your face in his shoulder.
“I’m so sorry.” He circled you with his arms, frowning.
“It’s okay, I forgive you,” he whispered quietly. It wasn’t like you to act this way and he could hear the edge to your voice.
Shaking your head, you felt yourself begin to cry. “No, you don’t understand. I’ve done something terrible.” He still said that he forgave you, which made you feel worse. “Tony, I’m not good enough for you.”
“Ah, I already know that,” he grinned. “No one is. I’m Tony-frickin’-Stark.” You finally let out a little giggle, and he pulled you back to the mattress. “Now shut up and go to sleep. Unlike me you need beauty sleep. Ow!” he cried as you punched him lightly on the chest. Well, you decided you wouldn’t tell him yet. He was too happy right now.
This is the second part of my three part X Reader story. C: