Warrior Cat Names and Characters Reviewer [CLOSED]

[Arcaii]

Ah, you liked it! Good, I'm always glad to help with cats' personalities.

[Arcaii]

Bump.

[{Spiritleaf}]

Name: Spiritleaf
Description: A beautiful, thick white coat of fur, with two different color eyes. Her right eye green , and her left blue.
Important Notes: Spiritleaf has an interesting background , as a kit, she was normal with both eyes blue. She was included in a prophecy and an evil cat ( that shall not be named ) was out to stop this from happening. His also evil apprentice, killed Spiritleaf, ('kit') on the orders of his mentor. Spiritkit gained the power of a spirit, (invisibility and at time can read minds) and also gained another color to one eye, green. She has many skills, including speed, great hunting ability, sharp ears, and slick battling skills. Oh yea! No one in her clan knows about this ability, except the medicine cat, who saw her resurrect and her eye change.

[Arcaii]

Name: Spiritleaf
Description: A beautiful, thick white coat of fur, with two different color eyes. Her right eye green , and her left blue.
Important Notes: Spiritleaf has an interesting background , as a kit, she was normal with both eyes blue. She was included in a prophecy and an evil cat ( that shall not be named ) was out to stop this from happening. His also evil apprentice, killed Spiritleaf, ('kit') on the orders of his mentor. Spiritkit gained the power of a spirit, (invisibility and at time can read minds) and also gained another color to one eye, green. She has many skills, including speed, great hunting ability, sharp ears, and slick battling skills. Oh yea! No one in her clan knows about this ability, except the medicine cat, who saw her resurrect and her eye change.

I'm gunna do the more thorough review on this one because there's just...so much to cover. This review's probably going to sound like one long "your character sucks!" speech, but I swear I have some valid criticisms.

Name Rating: 2/10
Name Type: Creative? I think?
Name Reasoning: There's a lot to take in here, but I'll save the character stuff for later. Right now, I wanna talk about the name, because that's pretty important.
Calling a kit Spirit- is akin to calling them Star- or Moon-. It's useless because it describes absolutely nothing about the kit themselves, and naming a cat after something considered sacred is extreme taboo, because it's putting the cat on a pedestal they don't belong even close to. That, and even if it was to mean something related to their belief system or personality, they don't get a name like that at birth. They get a descriptive name, like Brownkit or Duck-kit.
To her suffix: -leaf means a medicine cat who's incredibly talented with herbs. She's not a medicine cat, I assume, and so her last part of her name is invalid.
Alternative Name: Hollyfoot/Lightfoot. Both indicate a white cat, and -foot is suggested for reasons below.

Character Rating: 1/10
Character Reasoning: One thing I do want to alert you to is that a white cat born with blue eyes is more often than not born deaf. If you want to prevent that, it's perfectly fine to have her keep the hetero eyes. That said, here we go.
Spiritleaf is what we call in the business "OP". OP mean Over Powered, and it refers to a character who has way too many strengths and not enough weaknesses. Spiritleaf is skilled in everything - fighting, sensing, running, hunting...she's even got magical powers, which is something that is both heavily advised against and a game-breaker in canon (a book-breaker?). This is a character that can't possibly be bested or beaten, and that's not only boring, but not very fun to interact with in an RP.
I'm gunna hazard a guess and say this is one of your first ever characters - which is fine! We all had characters like this at one point. There's a lot of intricacy in making a good character that takes quite some time to completely master, so I won't blame you for that. I am a reviewer though, so I'm going to give you some suggestions to improve her.
The first thing is take away those powers of hers. Not even StarClan cats can read minds, and I don't think they can turn invisible either. There's no real reason to have them, either way.
The second is to narrow down her skills. I would focus on her speed, and that could even play into her surviving the apprentice's attempts at murder - she managed to get away from him on foot, and hid until it was safe. Take away her hunting skills (unless it's prey like rabbits or squirrels), take away her fighting abilities (big cats are usually the best fighters, and lean cats are the best runners. It's impossible for them to exist in the same cat.), and take away her high senses (cats have crazy senses anyway).
I think that's the most important things covered, and she should be relatively on stable ground after that.

[~Moony~]

Ok, just to start off... I am not angry, I was just laughing do hard right now. Thanks for being completely honest with my character! And yes, it is my first character I've made... I like the recommendations you've made on names, and I completely agree on everything... Wow x3 anyway, I have many other characters and this one I just happen to choose... As one of my main characters... And everything... Anyway thanks XD

[~Moony~]

This is {Spiritleaf} I'm using ~Moonflare~'s phone

[Arcaii]

Ok, just to start off... I am not angry, I was just laughing do hard right now. Thanks for being completely honest with my character! And yes, it is my first character I've made... I like the recommendations you've made on names, and I completely agree on everything... Wow x3 anyway, I have many other characters and this one I just happen to choose... As one of my main characters... And everything... Anyway thanks XD

This is {Spiritleaf} I'm using ~Moonflare~'s phone

Oh good, I didn't anger you. That's a genuine relief, haha. (Also, 'sup Moony?)

Yeah, I try to do my best to help with characters because, honestly, the sooner one learns about OC things, the better. I've made some pretty horrific characters back in my day, and it took me several years to actually realize that they weren't very good (I'm already mortified just thinking about them). If you feel like it, go ahead and send in some more of your characters, and I can help with/review those too.

[Altias]

Here I am with my ninja clan (you), ninja clan, here we stand. I'll give you ol' Paintfur, eheh.

Image/Description: Brown tortoiseshell with some lighter and darker mottled patches (I guess?) all over, with green eyes. (if i remember correctly)
Name: Paintfur
Gender: She-cat
Clan: ThunderClan
Rank: Warrior
Personality/Skills: She was a witty she-cat when she existed, and was the figurehead for an assassination attempt (and somewhat-success, seeing as she and the leader both died in the fire that wreaked the clan later) for her own sister, the leader of ThunderClan. She murdered her apprentice's mother, etc, etc, and was generally bad/a murderer because she felt like it gave her some power and authority over others. If she had survived, she probably would have ruled ThunderClan with a ferocious temper. She is notably strong, and uses her wits in battle exclusively.
Important Notes: I'm aware that Paint- was a really bad prefix to give her, haha. (I mean, cats don't really know what paint is.) I'd love to see your take on her!

[Arcaii]

Here I am with my ninja clan (you), ninja clan, here we stand. I'll give you ol' Paintfur, eheh.

Image/Description: Brown tortoiseshell with some lighter and darker mottled patches (I guess?) all over, with green eyes. (if i remember correctly)
Name: Paintfur
Gender: She-cat
Clan: ThunderClan
Rank: Warrior
Personality/Skills: She was a witty she-cat when she existed, and was the figurehead for an assassination attempt (and somewhat-success, seeing as she and the leader both died in the fire that wreaked the clan later) for her own sister, the leader of ThunderClan. She murdered her apprentice's mother, etc, etc, and was generally bad/a murderer because she felt like it gave her some power and authority over others. If she had survived, she probably would have ruled ThunderClan with a ferocious temper. She is notably strong, and uses her wits in battle exclusively.
Important Notes: I'm aware that Paint- was a really bad prefix to give her, haha. (I mean, cats don't really know what paint is.) I'd love to see your take on her!

WHAT UP ALT IT'S TIME TO REVIEW SOME OLD CHARACTERS

Name Rating: 4/10
Name Type: Creative
Name Reasoning: As you said, cats don't know what paint actually is, so that's one thing I don't have to cover. The second thing is that -fur would imply a cat that doesn't have any notable skills. By her description, I'm tempted to say that she's a great battler, or at least a tactical genius, which should also serve in with fighting.
Alternative Name: Kestrelclaw. Kestrel- implies a tortoiseshell, and -claw indicates her fighting skills.

Character Rating: 7/10
Character Reasoning: A villain's fine - super awesome, in fact, and there aren't enough good ones around these parts - but I think that there wasn't much more applied to her other than her streak of murder-happy power-thirst. What I'd do, if you're planning on revising her at any point in time, is give her some outside coloring. See if any cats thought that she was a great member of the Clan, or if any naturally distrusted her; ask how she managed to hide that part of her long enough to lay the trap, or if any cats actually planned with her, and exactly how cold-blooded (or hot-blooded) she'd have to be to want to kill her own sister.

[Altias]

That's some pretty solid advice! Thanks for reviewing, Arc!