1x1 daices. x tsunami,

[tsunami,]

emmie
↳ feeling: flustered, tense, stressed


emmie was absolutely positively certain that people were able to hear how loudly her heart was pounding. how could they not? her chest was going to hurt when this was all over from the way her heart was throwing itself against it. would she ever get used to being this close to mimi? well, considering that they've already kissed and fallen asleep on each other (twice!) and her heart still couldn't handle seeing mimi's face so close to hers, the answer is most likely no. emmie had already begun to accept this as a fact, but that didn't help her embarrassment.

things only seemed to get worse from there. well, a good and a bad worse, if that made sense. it probably didn't to anyone else but emmie herself, but that's beside the point. mind blank for a moment after mimi had been told to carry her, her arms instinctively moved to wrap themselves loosely around mimi's neck when she felt her feet loose contact with the ground. for once, she was glad that photoshop existed so that they could cover up how red her face and tips of her ears were becoming. it took a lot of strength for emmie to continue smiling at the camera when all she really wanted was to run and hide. oh, but that meant that mimi would have to put her down and to be honest, in emmie's ideal world, the two of them, together, would run off and hide from all these prying eyes and piercing red recording lights.

she did her best to keep eye contact with mimi, as directed by the cameraman, but all she could think about was how nice mimi's skin looked, how bright her eyes were, the presence of a faint pink on her cheeks that matched her own, how her hands were touching her...

her eyes squeezed shut for a moment, forcing the thoughts from her head. this is not the time!! there is a time and a place for everything and this is definitely not it. after what seemed like an eternity, emmie was back on her feet and the cameraman pronounced the shoot to be complete. after a quick bow to the staff, she turned to mimi. "i hope i wasn't too heavy! i can't believe they really made us do that." she muttered at the end, shooting a quick glare in the cameraman's direction. reaching for her bag, she pulled out her phone to check the time. upon hearing approaching footsteps, she turned and found herself staring up at yoojin. the smile on her face faltered.

"ladies! kwanseok, anjung, and i were about to go out for a quick bite. the snacks they provide here aren't nearly enough when you've been here for nearly five hours. a breathy chortle. "would you guys like to join us?

emmie spared a glance at mimi before she mustered up a grin to match yoojin's. "i would love to! thanks for thinking of us." more like, mimi come eat with us! oh, and you can bring your little puppy along too.

the fivesome set off to a nearby bakery and cafe at the suggestion of anjung. decorated with plants hanging from the ceiling and a bright neon sign that stood out against the stark white walls, it seemed like any other trendy cafe that seemed to be in these days. emmie ordered a matcha latte and a slice of raspberry cheesecake before settling down in a seat that the table they had chosen. she really needed something sweet to calm her nerves so this worked out well in her favor. they settled into comfortable conversation, emmie asking kwanseok and anjung questions about their modeling lives and them returning the favor to ask about her idol life. while she wasn't feeling as awkward as she had when it had been just her, mimi, and yoojin like last time, she was trying really hard not to pay much mind to the way yoojin had slid into the seat next to mimi without a moment of hesitation.

when the conversation at the table began to lull, emmie pulled out her phone to check if she had gotten any message from her group mates. noticing a large number of notifications on her sns, she opened the app and began scrolling. wow, they really got that behind the scenes footage out really quickly. a certain post then caught her eye. it was a screen capture of mimi and yoojin but the caption read: who is that pretty model-unnie? she and mimi look really good together!

emmie nearly gasped out loud as she read it, eyes widening. were the fans beginning to ship mimi and yoojin? just from that short interaction that saw alone? ah well, she shouldn't really be surprised. the fans were always coming up with new ships, as seen when she and mimi were trending after their groups' collab and later variety show. maybe it would just come and go? it was a futile attempt to make herself feel better. she knew all too well that things like this were likely to trend for weeks on end, especially if more content with the two of them came out to fuel the fire. even when she and mimi had asked the fans to stop, the fans simply took it as an opportunity to create even more content about the two of them.

she kept scrolling, growing anxious as she did. slowly, her feed became filled with what could only be described as a shipping war. post about 'team emi' vs 'team yoomi' became endless and she felt a subtle panic spread through her. this was definitely not going away any time soon. she spared a glance at mimi.

"woah! look, emmie, mimi, and yoojin are trending on sns!" anjung turned her phone so the others could see and began scrolling through the same posts emmie had just been seeing on her own feed.

to be honest, emmie never really minded the posts about her and mimi all that much because it felt like a bit of extra reassurance knowing that their fans were supporting them even though she still didn't quite know her own feelings. now, things were different. with yoojin and mimi now becoming a topic of interest, emmie felt like she was losing a battle she didn't even know she was in against an opponent that quite frankly, scared her a little. she looked over at mimi for her reaction, gnawing at her lip and growing restless in her seat.

[daices.]

✦ MIMI ✦
〘 feeling ↠ nervous, confused, stressed 〙
- - - - - ✦ - - - - - ✦ - - - - - ✦ - - - - - ✦ - - - - - ✦ - - - - - ✦ - - - - - ✦ - - - - -

Mimi brightened immediately at the mention of food, clapping lightly. "Ooh! I'm down~! Where are we going?" Slotting her left arm with Emmie's right, Mimi rocked on the balls of her feet, excited at the prospect of being introduced to a new restaurant or cafe in a new, unfamiliar area.

Mimi spent the entire time participating in the light chatter, babbling excitedly about nothing and everything- mostly about the food in the area, but also a little about her life and being an idol in general. Learning about the models was interesting as well; Anjung was a lot less intimidating after a moment of conversation, and Kwanseok seemed mean at first but it quickly became evident his humor mainly consisted of light ribbing. Yoojin contributed surprisingly little, nothing more than sly smiles and the occasional wink whenever Mimi caught her eye, but Mimi just chalked that up to the long shoot that they just had.

The cafe that they came to was cute, quaint, and honestly clashed with the polished and extravagant aura that the models exuded but Mimi couldn't help but imagine a scenario where Emmie worked at such a cute cafe, in a cute apron and her hair done up in a-

What. Are you doing. Mimi had paused for a second in her step just thinking about it, almost tripping when Emmie walked forward. If her imagination didn't quit it, Mimi knew that she was going to fall onto her face sooner or later.

Mimi kept fluttering between the different bakery options, finally settling on a hot oolong milk tea and a slice of sea salt and dark chocolate tart. Their conversations continued, but honestly Mimi was more enamored with her creamy dessert, content with listening and offering noncommittal answers from time to time.

"Mimi-ah, do you want to try my dessert? This cafe's pies are to die for~" Yoojin held up a forkful of cherry pie, the whole fruits glistening enticingly in the coffee-house lighting. Mimi grinned, definitely not one to refuse free food, biting the piece off the fork and humming in satisfaction at the tart fruit flavor without thinking much of it. "Wow, that's so good! I'll try one of their fruit options next time. Do you want to try some of mine?" Mimi held up a forkful of her chocolate dessert.

"Mmm~ That's really good. You have good taste, Mimi-ah." Yoojin lightly held Mimi's wrist in place as she ate the forkful, gaze boring into Mimi's as the aforementioned idol tried not to squirm in her seat, all too aware of Emmie's gaze from directly across the table.

"Um-" "Get a room, you two, will ya?" Kwanseok snarked, sneering at them from where he was sitting at the edge of the table and scarfing down a croissant sandwhich. "Ruining my appetite with y'all flirtin' through food 'n stuff. Is this what lesbians do now? Ow!" He lurched forward slightly, tousled hair flopping into his eyes as Anjung wacked the back of his head without looking up from her phone, a clear practiced motion. "Don't be crass, Kwannie. You just met these people, leave them -and Yoojin-ah- alone."

Yoojin laughed delicately, a hand in front of her mouth as a slight blush rose to her cheeks. "Oh, have I been found out~?" She joked, while Mimi quickly retracted her hand, fiddling with the fork in her lap. "It- it really isn't... Like that..." She mumbled, giving Emmie a slightly desperate glance. They had already had one (rather terrible, in Mimi's opinion) fallout from this sort of scenario; she loathed to have to go through that again. "I promise, there's nothing! Nothing happening."

The conversation began to dwindle from then on, Mimi focused on her food half out of necessity, suddenly uncomfortable. She had never been that phased by other people intensely focused on her love life, but it was definitely different comparing anonymous usernames on social media with people judging her face to face; new friends, acquaintances, or coworkers making assumptions about who she liked or disliked didn't sit well with her. She found herself continuously stealing glances at Emmie, trying to gauge how the other idol felt, hoping Emmie could read the apology she was trying to send with her expression.

Mimi's stomach sank further when Anjung flipped her phone, showing a thread of screencaps and short clips with Yoojin kissing her on the head, or clinging to her arm, so on and so forth. Mimi didn't know why this felt so different compared to getting shipped with Emmie, but it almost made her queasy, the negative feeling compounded tenfold due to the two individuals directly involved being sat either right next to her or in front of her. Not to mention she didn't want this trend to be interpreted as her being a player; her mind whirled with all the negative ways this could be spun.

"Why does this keep happening? I'm just... I'm not even good with social media, or active on it..." Mimi trailed off, picking at the last vestiges of her tart, the chocolate on her tongue suddenly unbearably bitter. She had never been one to second guess the things that she did, her stage persona aligning rather well with her general personality and thus not needing a deep awareness of her behavior. This sudden need to police her actions -don't hug them cause it could be construed this way, don't do that so they don't think you're dating them- was disorienting.

As if on cue, her phone buzzed as well; fishing it from her pocket, Mimi grimaced when she read the notification from Jia.

Yo, what're you doing? Followed by a link to one of many multiplying twitter threads, shipping her with Yoojin, then her with Emmie, and generally creating a shipping war.

It wasn't like Mimi was an extremely private person; her fans knew a lot about her life, even from before she was a trainee, but she did hate when people made assumptions about her, especially to the point that her name was involved with one of the trending topics on sns. She kind of wanted to hole up in her room for a month at this point until everything died down. Why couldn't they just let her be with who she wanted?

Mimi frowned at the question that just arose in her head. What? As far as she knew, she wasn't interested in anyone.

As Mimi was distracted with her own inner monologue and texting her groupmates who were throwing up quite a fuss, Yoojin turned to Emmie. "Ah, Emmie-ah, seems we're in competition~ who do you think will come up on top?" Her tone was light and innocent enough, but her intense stare and the light sneer on her face said otherwise. especially as she leaned closer to Mimi and wrapped a hand around the idol's waist, Mimi too preoccupied to really notice, merely sending the group a vague, slightly worried smile.

[tsunami,]

emmie
↳ feeling: tense, weary


with the way her grip tighten on the phone in her hand, emmie would have thought she might break it if her mind hadn’t been preoccupied by yoojin’s not-so-subtle jab. she forced out a laugh, though it probably wasn’t very convincing considering the way her teeth were clenched into a compulsory smile. ”haha, i wonder. i suppose that’s up to the fans to decide, though i wouldn’t take it too seriously.”

despite what she had said, emmie was so ready to do whatever it took in order to just wipe that sly grin off yoojin’s face. while she wasn’t actually planning on doing anything, she was prepared to fight back if yoojin tried anything fishy. her eyes followed yoojin’s hand as it slid onto mimi’s waist, emmie’s already strained smile wavering.

throughout their entire meal, emmie had tried so hard not to look in yoojin and mimi’s direction. she knew what yoojin was doing and she had absolutely no interest in entertaining her. when the two had bites of each other’s desserts, she made sure to stare down at her own plate, pretending to be completely enamored by her own sweet treat to notice. at kwanseok’s snarky, albeit a bit insensitive, remark, she laughed along with the others despite the discomfort tugging at her heart. her acting skills were improving by the day.

she looked over at mimi for a moment, who starting to look a bit stressed. she was beginning to feel a bit overwhelmed herself and nearly sighed in relief when she felt her phone buzz. ”oh dear, look at the time. my leader just texted me to remind me that our group has an early interview tomorrow so i should probably take my leave.” she stood up quickly, gathering her belongings and scooting out of her seat.

“this was nice, thank you for inviting me! goodbye kwanseok-ssi, anjung-ssi, yoojin-ssi. i’ll text you later, mimi!” with one last polite smile, she hurried out of the cafe and into the company car that had been waiting outside. she flopped into the seat with a sigh. maybe that was a little cowardly, running away when the atmosphere became strained, but emmie felt suffocated in that little cafe, yoojin’s eyes looking right through her.

sorry i left in such a hurry. we didn’t get to talk much but it was really nice seeing you again!! we’ll have to pick a day for our ice cream date when we both have some free time on our schedules! her finger hovered over the send button for a moment. was it okay for her to call it a date? it wasn’t like she meant it as a date that one would go on with their significant other. it was a platonic date. people go on those, right? she clicked the button before she could change her mind, tossing her phone across the seat once she did.

why am i so nervous? it’s not like i was hinting at any underlying meanings. oh wait- but what if that’s how she’ll interpret it? she scrambled to pick up her phone and send mimi another text to explain that she didn’t mean anything weird. unfortunately for her, the car had just pulled up to M3RCY’s apartment and she had to get out. with a groan, she hopped out of the car and up the stairs, now exhausted from the day’s events.

once in her room, she dropped her things and flopped onto the bed with a groan. ”what’s up with you?” chaewon enquired from behind the magazine she was reading in her bed. “you were so excited about being able to see mimi again this morning and now it looks like you got ran over by a bus. twice.” emmie lifted a hand and swatted the air in response, too tired both physically and mentally to answer properly.

then, she felt herself getting pushed over until she was looking at the ceiling rather than being face down on the bed. another groan. “c’mon now, lay it on me. you’ll feel better, i promise.” emmie rolled over onto her side to look up at chaewon who had settled beside her. “you saw the posts, right? the ones with mimi and yoojin? i- i just wasn’t expecting it. not that it could have been something i could have predicted. heck, i barely even saw it coming when it was about mimi. i know this isn’t even that big of a deal but it just doesn’t feel right.”

“well of course it wouldn’t. you’re seeing someone else being shipped with your girlfriend.”

she took a breath. “she’s not! my girlfriend. anyway, i hate to complain about this because it really shouldn’t bother me but gosh we went to a cafe after the shoot and yoojin...” emmie spent the next couple of minutes recounting all the too close for comfort moments she had witnessed between yoojin and mimi, getting more and more worked up as she went. “...and i swear she’s got it out for me. i have no idea what i did to her but i have no doubt she does not like me one bit.”

she paused for a moment. “do... do you think i’m overreacting? am i just blaming yoojin because i don’t like the fact that she’s close to mimi? am i actually the mean one here?” her voice was soft, a subtle feeling of horror spreading through her. this was it. she was actually going crazy. she was really blaming this girl for all these weird feelings she was having and painting her like a villian just because she was really close to this other girl that she li-

“stop! stop it right now. i know what’s going through that little head of yours and you need to stop. you’re entitled to your own feelings and though i can’t say much about what you should or shouldn’t feel about yoojin, all i ask is that you don’t let yourself get hurt over this.” chaewon reached over to pat emmie’s cheek. ”i will support you no matter what, but please, take care of yourself too. i understand that you have a lot of emotions running high right now but remember that you are the most important person in this picture right now. got it?”

emmie gave her a small smile. ”got it.”

[daices.]

✦ MIMI ✦
〘 feeling ↠ anxious, happy 〙
- - - - - ✦ - - - - - ✦ - - - - - ✦ - - - - - ✦ - - - - - ✦ - - - - - ✦ - - - - - ✦ - - - - -

Mimi jerked her head up when Emmie gathered her things, shifting in her seat as if to get up too- but what would they say about that? Her leaving with Emmie? Marred with indecision, Emmie had already made her way to the door of the cafe before she could react. "Uh- bye...." Mimi whispered instead, turning to the models with a weak smile. "Um... I should probably go soon, as well. It's been a long day and I'll still be wrapping up promotions tomorrow."

Yoojin caught her wrist as Mimi got up, pouting slightly. "Promise me we'll see each other soon?"

Mimi nodded, bowing slightly to everyone. "Yeah, I'll... see you later! Um, It was nice to meet you all, Kwanseok-ssi, Anjung-ssi." Practically scurrying out of the cafe, Mimi let out a long sigh as she stepped into the crisp air, relaxing just a touch away from the prying eyes of anyone. Walking down the block a ways before flagging a taxi -she didn't want to see her manager or anyone she knew, not just yet- Mimi collapsed into the backseat, running a hand over her face.

She didn't feel much better when she got back to the apartment, dropping off her bag and kicking off her shoes before making a beeline for her room. Collapsing onto the covers with a groan, she was about to fall asleep and put off thinking about what just happened for a few more blissful hours when she felt the bed dip next to her and a hand prodding her shoulder.

"You're gonna regret sleeping with all your makeup on, dummy." Mimi merely groaned, swatting away Jia's hand.

"Also with the posts with you and Yoojin... I know that you didn't-" "-I don't want to talk about it." Mimi cut in gruffly, abruptly standing up and grabbing her sleepshirt, making her way to the bathroom.

After she got out of the shower and brushed her teeth, Mimi checked her phone, seeing the message from Emmie. The word "date" jumped out at her, making her equally elated and nervous; elated because a "date" with Emmie, no matter how platonic, never failed to send a zing through her, but nervous because it just brought her mind back to the flurry of activity undoubtedly happening on social media right now. Still, Mimi didn't want to lose touch with Emmie again, quickly firing off a message before she could think too much about it. Yes, it was nice to see you again! I'll be waiting for our next date~ Good luck on your interview tomorrow!

Even if Mimi tried her best to stay connected with Emmie, even she couldn't deny that her messages got shorter and more brusque as time went on. She was glad that their promotions had ended pretty promptly, her lack of activity on social media and outside of the apartment, really, needing little explanation other than the occasional "I'm tired"- even if her groupmates sent her worried glances from time to time.

Mimi looked at Emmie's text asking about icecream tomorrow, sent a couple hours ago. Sighing for the umpteenth time that day, Mimi groaned before punching out a message, trying not to think about the hypotheticals of paparazzi being around, or maybe fans sneaking pictures, or-

Yeah, I'll be free! Can't wait to see you~ <3

When tomorrow rolled around Mimi left with a large windbreaker and a baseball cap pulled low over her eyes, mumbling a goodbye to her groupmates before she caught a taxi over to their meeting place. Hovering in front of the shop, neon lights casting a faint glow on the ground, Mimi gave Emmie a light grin when she saw her, shoving her hands into her pockets. "Hey, Emmie." Mimi felt compelled to give a hug like she always would have, still extremely delighted to see the other girl in person again, but the pressures of the press that still hadn't fully left her mind reared to the forefront, keeping her hands clenched in her pockets.

[tsunami,]

emmie
↳ feeling: worried, excited, concerned


in the days between their next meeting, emmie could tell that something was a little off. though they had been sending messages to one another like usual, she began to notice that mimi's texts were becoming less frequent and more curt. growing more worried as the days passed with no improvement, she decided to ask mimi if she was free for their date during the upcoming weekend. M3RCY had had a pretty packed schedule for quite some time so she jumped on this chance for a break.

emmie had been bouncing on toes with her hands tucked in the front pocket of her hoodie as she waited for mimi to arrive. once she saw the taller girl's familiar figure approach, she took her hands out to wave excitedly at the girl, a wide grin on her face. "hey! thanks for coming out here to meet me." she paused for a moment, contemplating whether or not to ask her how she was doing. maybe it would be better if they got their sweets and settled down before she brought up such a conversation.

"shall we?" she held open the door to the little shop she had found that was not too close but not too far from both of their apartments. the further away they got from their usual hangout places, the better. perhaps it would stall the paparazzi just a little. after all, there was no reason to make their lives easy when they weren't making her's easy either.

with the way the shipping wars had been blowing up online, emmie had been staying off social media to save her sanity. there was never anything good waiting for her on there, so why bother? she had thrown herself into M3RCY's promotional work, avoiding any and all questions and comments about what was going on. she couldn't always avoid the whispers though, and those always hurt the most.

once inside, her eyes lit up at the large menu hanging from the ceiling, listing flavors she had never even heard of before. she grabbed mimi's hand in the midst of her excitement, tugging on it as if to tell her to look even though there was no need to. it's not like there were any other large signs listing the shop's available flavors hanging around. "oo there's so many to choose from! how can i decide?" despite her childish whining, emmie was carefully thought out her options. "what're you feeling? i think the cookies and cream and ube flavors look pretty good. oh, but i usually get matcha. well, it's good to try something new every once in a while..." her eyes never left the menu, entranced by it's grandeur. after rambling on for another minute or so, she finally decided on a scoop of red bean ice cream in a waffle cone.

after paying, she grabbed some napkins and stood off to the side to wait for mimi, eager to dig in. once she was set, they settled in a corner of the shop, sitting on high brightly colored stools that matched the neon signs that decorated the interior as well as the exterior. emmie pulled the cloth face mask she had been wearing down under chin before licking her ice cream with a satisfied sigh.

"so, how've you been doing?" a pause. "i didn't really want to bring this up right away but I've been a little worried. you seem a little distant these days- is everything okay?" her voice was soft, brows furrowed slightly in concern. no matter what she was feeling about the situation herself, emmie knew that mimi had a greater weight on her than she did. as the shared piece in the battle, emmie was sure there was additional pressure on mimi and she didn't like that one bit. not only was it not fair to her dear friend, but it was also clearly causing her some stress. for a moment, she wondered if yoojin had spoken to mimi about what was happening but quickly shut down the thought. no, now's not the time to worry about her. mimi's right in front of me and the most important thing right now. a gentle smile lingered on emmie's face, a little anxious to hear what mimi had to say.

[daices.]

✦ MIMI ✦
〘 feeling ↠ anxious, soft uwu 〙
- - - - - ✦ - - - - - ✦ - - - - - ✦ - - - - - ✦ - - - - - ✦ - - - - - ✦ - - - - - ✦ - - - - -

Mimi swore that Emmie was like medicine; a balm, maybe even a cure. Every second that she spent with the shorter girl she felt better, a little less anxious and tense, the knots in her shoulder dissolving slightly. Following Emmie into the shop, she took note of the mask that the girl was wearing; so preoccupied, she had entirely forgotten to grab one herself.

She chuckled in good humor at Emmie's whining, positively melting while Emmie babbled about food, almost more excited than she was for once. Where she hadn't been that hungry before, Mimi felt her old appetite begin to rear her head, and she quickly joined Emmie in the very serious discussion about what to eat. "Aww, the red bean does look good..." She mused, gaze roving the menu. "Oooo... They have ube! But also black sesame..." She frowned, pouting, before getting on a scoop of black sesame.

Settling into the corner with Emmie, Mimi hummed contentedly, eyes crinkling into a slight smile as she looked at Emmie's happy grin. If she could look at that excited smile all day, every day, she would. She entertained asking Emmie for a taste for a second, but immediately remembered what happened the last time she shared food like that. At Emmie's question, she deflated slightly, remembering the events of the past week or so. "I'm..." Mimi sighed, glancing down at the table. "I'm... Okay." Even she winced at how fake that sounded. "It's just... I guess I've never had to, um... Worry about this sort of thing? I don't really act that different, um, when I'm in front of cameras versus off, I guess... And uh, everyone trying to decide who I'm gonna date, or who I should date, or scrutinizing exactly how I interact with people is kinda, um." To her complete horror, Mimi felt tears begin to well up in her eyes. But she also couldn't stop the words from tumbling out of her mouth once she started.

"I- I guess I didn't think I could be under this much scrutiny, Hilight's really only been around for two years- and also I don't like... I don't like how all this is almost more popular than our music. Am I a musician, an idol? Or am I just "the person getting shipped"?" Mimi sniffled, absentmindedly eating another bite of her icecream, before picking at it with her spoon, the rich nutty flavor lost.

A wet laugh. "Gosh- sorry, I don't know... I didn't even ask how you were. How are you? With everything. You and Yoojin don't really mesh, and then I go ahead and drag you both into this..." Mimi lapsed into silence, wiping her eyes and pulling her hat lower over her eyes, as if she could shield Emmie from her petulant expression (even if it was kind of a lost cause at this point).

A ping from her phone. Mimi gave it a glance, and sighed further, slumping so her head rested on the table. "And it doesn't help when Yoojin keeps sending me links to threads and posts talking about all of this... But I haven't had the heart to say anything to her about it. She seems to find this all super exciting. I dunno. I haven't bothered to check social media either..." Mimi closed her eyes and bit her lip, trying to sort through her frayed nerves and stop the tears, equal parts embarrassed, anxious, and guilty. Something about Emmie just made her emotions go haywire, and it looked like that inadvertently affected her negative emotions as well. But it was cathartic, slightly; being able to talk about it lifted a slight pressure off her chest, even if in a terribly messy way.

"Gosh, sorry... I really just ruined this outing with all this... Your first free night and I do this. Ugh." Slowly getting up, Mimi wiped her eyes again, still not meeting Emmie's gaze.

[tsunami,]

emmie
↳ feeling: panicked, worried


i can't believe i just made her cRY. emmie's initial reaction to mimi's tears had been shock, followed closely by worry and panic. her nervous gaze quickly morphed into one of concern as she reached over to offer mimi a napkin. though she really wanted to leap over the table that instant and wipe away her tears, she figured it'd be best to just let her say what she needed to let out first.

"you're an idol! of course you are. no one can ever take that away from you. you've worked your butt off to get where you are today and i can attest to that." she nodded solemnly at her own comment, her heart breaking just a little at the sound of mimi's wet laugh. "i'm just fine. staying off my sns has been one of the best decision's i've ever made." a weak attempt to lighten the mood, to no avail. "it wasn't your fault." she continued softly, her hand slowly reaching across the table as her body kept telling her to just get up and hug her.

but she couldn't. not yet. there were so many risks. what if the paparazzi had already found them and were watching through the window? what if the cashier had recognized one of them and took pictures? that would only make things worse. those thoughts were the only thing stopping her right then, but they wouldn't hold her for long. "you didn't drag either of us into this. this was entirely out of your control, mimi. please don't put the blame on yourself like that."

watching mimi slump down onto the table, emmie's heart sank further. no wonder mimi had been a bit distant the past couple of weeks. she had been dealing with so much on her own and emmie cursed herself for not thinking to speak to mimi about it earlier. she had been so wrapped up in the whole her vs. yoojin part of it that she failed to recognize that person that was getting hurt the most by all of this was mimi.

a frown formed on her face at the mention of yoojin's excitement about the situation. "talk to her. this whole thing has clearly been hurting you and you are not obliged to sacrifice your own feelings for those of your friends. i'm sure she'll understand." although she didn't completely believe in the last statement she had made, she figured that if yoojin was really mimi's friend like she continued to claim to be, then she would. why is she even getting so excited about something like that? the thought only lasted for a moment, leaving her mind quickly as she listened while mimi continued.

at mimi's apology, she teetered over the edge. setting down what was left of her cone on a napkin, she hopped out of her seat across from mimi, slid into the one next to her. in one swift motion, pulled the girl back into her seat and towards her so that mimi's head would rest on her shoulder. emmie's arm slid up and over mimi's shoulders while her other hand moved to gently wipe the tears from her face. she had pulled her face mask on beforehand and made sure their backs were towards the window, just as a precaution. though she couldn't really do anything about the other people that were in the shop, emmie couldn't just sit there and listen. she just wanted to comfort mimi, to hold her close and do whatever she could to make her feel better.

"sorry, you can move if you're uncomfortable. i- i just couldn't sit there and not do anything." she tilted her head to rest on mimi's, staring at a stain on the white table before them. "i'm so sorry you've had to deal with all of this on your own. i should've reached out. the whole thing was bothering me, sure, but i should have realized that it was probably hurting you more." her voice wavered a bit, the release of all these high strung emotions were starting to get to her.

"i'll always, always be here to listen if you need it. i hate the thought of you having to bear everything on your own. if i still saw you the way i did when we were still trainees, i probably would have fallen for that strong front you put up and not think twice about you feeling some type of way about this kind of situation. honestly, though, i'm much happier now knowing that that's not the case." a breath. "your feelings are valid and even though they might be hard to deal with at times, they're part of what makes us human. i'm also really glad you talked to me about this. i know i'm also kinda part of this mess but i'll do whatever you need me to to set things straight."

she sighed, the hand around mimi's shoulders patting her gently. "i love being an idol, but sometimes, it also really sucks." a weak laugh escaped her, the heavy atmosphere weighing down on her.

[daices.]

✦ MIMI ✦
〘 feeling ↠ she's bab e y 〙
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Mimi stared at her melting icecream while Emmie assured her, picking at the frozen treat. "Yeah, I should talk to her, I guess..." She couldn't help but feel uncomfortable thinking about that ensuing conversation; for some reason, she didn't feel like Yoojin would be very receptive to her concerns.

Her tears, which had slowed and dried for the most part, came back in a wave when Emmie quickly sat next to her and pulled her into a hug. Whimpering and burying her head in Emmie's shirt, Mimi struggled to get herself under control as the hug brought out another tide of emotion.

"T-thank you..." She hiccuped, setting down her icecream and circling her arms around Emmie's waist. "I'm not uncomfortable, it's- it's okay, you were busy and I'm just- just being dumb. Didn't say anything even- even though we had this talk last time." A wet laugh, before she tightened her arms, leaning into the comfort of Emmie's hug. In Emmie's arms, for a second, she felt like she was shielded from all the problems she had been facing for the past week, from all the people around them.

"You're too good to me, you know that?" She started quietly, voice barely audible over the din of the shop. "You always know just what to say, when to say it... Gosh, imagine being good with your words." A slight chuckle, Mimi relaxing further into Emmie's embrace. "Thank you for being here for me. You don't need to do anything; thank you for offering. Thank you for being here. Just... Thank you. I know it doesn't sound like it 'cause I'm somehow always crying around you, but I'm here for you, too, for anything, even this; I know it's... Not great for either of us."

A moment of silence where Mimi composed herself, simply enjoying the company. Her eyes were definitely puffy and her throat was clogged up, rasping her voice but honestly she had to stop clinging onto Emmie like this; what was she, a koala? A baby? No! She didn't need to keep on burdening Emmie with her blubbering. She pulled back slightly, but immediately missed the lack of physical contact, compromising with one hand still looped around her waist and the other fiddling with the hem of Emmie's hoodie. Maybe just another five minutes...

"Um... Actually -and you don't have to say yes, at all!- but um, would you be, um, be willing to stay? While I text Yoojin about it..." As if she had cast a spell or predicted the future, her phone dinged again. Reaching over a hand, Mimi grimaced slightly when she saw Yoojin had sent another link, along with some heart emojis.

"Aaah, what should I say..." Muttering, Mimi quickly drafted a message, still leaning under Emmie's chin -trying, but miserably failing, to notice how nice Emmie smelled and how soft she felt- before she tilted the phone slightly so Emmie could see.

Haha look at this one! How did they even make this edit?

That's funny lol but would you mb mind not sending me those? I'm trying to take a break from social media and all of this.

"What do you think? Is that clear enough, or should I say more? Or less?" Mimi tilted her head up, giving Emmie an inquiring gaze as she bit her lip in uncertainty, startling slightly at how close the other woman was, flushing slightly at her own reaction. Get it together, Mimi; now's not the time!

"Speaking of, has Yoojin not talked to you at all? Being the other party in this, after all... But maybe you two don't really talk? I dunno..."

[tsunami,]

emmie
↳ feeling: soft, upset


emmie's eyes closed slowly, embracing the warmth and feeling of having mimi nestled by her side. even though she couldn't see mimi's face from her position, she was happy to hear mimi's chuckle and feel her shoulders relax. "well, if it makes you feel any better, i also cried in front you before. at this rate, that’ll become our greeting. a chuckle, a smile forming from beneath her mask.

it was safe to say that emmie was extremely comfortable in her current position. mimi's hair was soft against her cheek. if she looked down, she could see her long, dark lashes. the arms around her waist was a gentle presence, though emmie was pretty conscious of the way they tightened and relaxed with mimi’s movements.

she was glad she was wearing mask to conceal most of her face when mimi pulled one of her arms away. the small frown that made its way onto her face would’ve been a bit embarrassing to explain. she already missed the warmth, even though mimi was still at her side. ”of course.”

her reply was punctuated by the timely ding of mimi’s phone, her gaze casting downward to look on. the frown on her face grew. was all this just fun and games for yoojin? she felt a bit unsettled, the feeling bubbling low in her belly. ”i think sounds alright. straight to the point- that’s probably best.”

her gaze moved away at mimi’s words, thoughts of that uncomfortable interaction in the bathroom at the shoot coming to mind. to be honest, emmie had received a text the other day from a number she didn’t have saved. it had been a link to a running poll that fans had made to see who, her or yoojin, was the better ‘match’ for mimi. it turned out, the polls were saying it was yoojin. emmie had tried to ignore the pang of annoyance and disappointment that ran through her when she saw it. though she had been a bit confused at first, the sender sent another message soon after.

emmie-ssi, it’s yoojin. just thought it’d be fun to share, hope you don’t mind ;)

of course she minded. the first text yoojin sent her was just to try to provoke her? ever since that encounter in the bathroom, yoojin had been much more aggressive and straight forward with her attacks. emmie tried to think of herself encased in a protective bubble, one that kept yoojin and all things associated with her out while everything else was allowed to pass through.

“no... i think we’re just not a good match. it’s okay though, that’s just how it is sometimes.” with the way mimi probably couldn’t see the small smile on her face, emmie’s eyes smiled instead, hoping to reassure her. she wasn’t going to outright say that she didn’t particularly like yoojin or her attitude, but it seemed as though mimi was starting to get the hint.

reaching into her pocket with her free hand, she pulled out her phone and opened her sns. though she had been avoiding doing so as a result of the whole shipping wars situation, there was something that was bothering her about the way yoojin was getting so excited, so happy, about the posts. did she really have no qualms about what was happening? typing in yoojin’s name in the search bar, it came to no surprise to emmie that her account popped up as the first result. scrolling through her profile, she saw pictures from her modeling shoots, some with her other model friends, and some of her and mimi.

wait, mimi? her eyes widened a bit as she reached a point in the feed where it was just post after post, some retweets and other seemingly original, of her and mimi with captions and hashtags similar to the ones that were being used by fans involved in the crazy ship war. though most of the photos of her and mimi seemed to have been taken off guard by another person, there were a selfie or two scattered in between of the two of them that likely nobody other than yoojin herself could have had and uploaded. she blinked once. twice. was this was she thought it was?

her eyes moved towards the girl currently leaning against her, the one in the very photos she was looking at. ”um, mimi? i- i think you should see this.” she passed her phone over to mimi with a small gulp, anxious to see how she would react. emmie was beginning to feel a simmering anger starting to rise in her herself. i understand that maybe yoojin doesn’t know how badly this has been affecting mimi, but getting directly involved like that? adding more fuel to the fire? she’s just helping to make this a bigger mess! and i can guarantee you she probably thinks she won’t be the one that’ll have to clean it up, so of course she doesn’t care. her brows furrowed, the simmering anger now turning into a boil.

[daices.]

✦ MIMI ✦
〘 feeling ↠ panicked!!! 〙
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Mimi took a deep breath after Emmie okay'ed her message, gaze passing over the words for a second before pressing the send button. "Aaah, I'm nervous..." She mumbled, flipping her phone over so she wouldn't compulsively check the little "read" message and overthink herself into a frenzy.

"Ah, I wish that you two could get along, but I understand..." For some reason, she really wanted them to mesh, beyond the trivialities of this whole dramatic feud they were snarled in. First because she couldn't really conceive how anyone could dislike Emmie -barring herself of course, but that had been quickly remedied!- but also because it almost felt like an affront to herself, like someone was judging her own merit. Like they disapproved of their relationship. Relationship? No, like they disapproved of their friendship. Just something about the whole scenario left a sour taste in her mouth.

Quickly, she shook the thoughts from her head, content to decompressing in relative silence while Emmie scrolled on her phone. Mimi lifted a hand to absentmindedly toy with Emmie's hair, fascinated by the smooth blonde strands. Maybe it was her emotions running amok, but Emmie looked especially pretty today, even with the mask covering half her face. Really, she looked gorgeous without fail every time they met, but the soft colored lights reflecting off of Emmie's gaze while the idol leveled a smile that crinkled her eyes made Mimi melt. Giving her an answering grin, Mimi let her head settle back on Emmie's collar with a soft thump.

Mimi had calmed down for the most part, a constant thrum of nervousness running through her as she waited for a message, but she was mostly a little thirsty from her small outburst earlier, distantly watching the small droplets of melted icream drip onto their haphazardly placed napkins. "Hmm? Did you find something funny?" She mused, sitting up slightly -she hadn't realized how much she was draped over Emmie- and grabbing the phone before scrolling.

"Wh- What is this?" She rasped, voice getting tremulous with fear and uncertainty. She had been largely absent on social media in the past few weeks, but she recognized Yoojin's profile picture and, unfortunately, some of the pictures included in the posts as well.

"Say cheese~" Yoojin said, hanging an arm around Mimi's shoulders while she took a selfie faster than Mimi could blink.

Mimi simply laughed, nudging Yoojin's shoulder good naturedly. "You gonna tell me what these pics are for?"

Yoojin merely winked in response. "Oh, you'll see~!"

Mimi felt her blood turn to ice as she scrolled through post after post basically detailing a fake relationship; she winced as if struck from a physical blow when she saw a picture taken at the cafe from last time, completely against her knowledge. She could feel Emmie's loose hold, such a source of comfort a second ago, morphing into a reminder of everything that was going on- and it was the fact that Emmie's embrace was beginning to be associated with something malicious that spurred her to wrench herself away, hugging her knees and curling into herself before her irrational fears could poison her perception of Emmie even more.

"I- I can't- All this time? She was just...? How many more pictures does she have? Would she threaten me with them? Why is she doing this? I thought she was my friend..." Mimi was half muttering to herself, eyes wide and cloudy with panic as all the worst-case scenarios rushed through her mind, a deep lance of betrayal shooting through her like a physical pain. What if Yoojin had taken photos that could be used as blackmail? How many pictures did she have? How many people only knew her, thought of her as Yoojin's? What if they only liked her because of that? While in good fun, what if that stopped her from getting future opportunities? Could it turn into a scandal? She was only two years into her career, she hadn't nearly made enough to pay off her loans-

Mimi could feel her throat closing, her vision blurring as each breath came in a shuddering gasp, fighting for air. She had only had a panic attack once before, when she had been waiting for her evaluation to see if she was fit to debut, but this felt the same, digging up another host of negative emotions that sent Mimi's heart racing.

"I- I can't- I-" A choked sob interrupted her disjointed speech. "I have to- I have to go. I-" Mimi struggled to her feet, limbs weak and vision blurring, barely remembering to grab her phone and wallet before she stumbled to the door, no destination in mind except for out.

With her shaky movements and vision that wouldn't stop swimming, it was inevitable that she would trip. She had only made it a few feet from the door before she tripped on a crack in the sidewalk, falling in an ungainly sprawl. Cursing at the pain, the embarrassment, and her own reaction to the situation, Mimi tried to get up but found her limbs protesting against the movement. She then simply fought to get herself under control, muffling her trembling breaths with her hoodie, eyes screwed shut.

"Mimi you- you weak- I can't- breathe- why- please-" Stupid, stupid! Why are you reacting like this? A dumb overreaction! What happened to the suave Mimi from before? Her cool and calm demeanor that didn't care about anyone?

Emmie had happened. And then Yoojin. One was definitely leagues better than the other, she saw that now.