JDT, The Life of Me, A CS Pet Journal :D

[kimmy1479]

Thanks. Sorry about the shortness. XD

[Jayflight.]

it's ok your busy with somethin ^^

[brambletalon98]

Its okay

[Confidential Ness]

I don't mean to flame, but...
This is horribly written.
These are overdone.
The grammar is atrocious.
None of the characters have personalities.
The plot is a cliche storm.

[Confidential Ness]

I don't mean to flame, but...
This is horribly written.
These are overdone.
The grammar is atrocious.
None of the characters have personalities.
The plot is a cliche storm.

If you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything. Instead of saying how rubbish something is, you could at least say how you could fix it. Tjis is not crit, it is just plain rude.

Nobody wants that kind of rude spam on there work!

Kimmy worked her heart out on this. Nobody wants to work really hard simply to get put down. The whole style of writing she is done is clearly not to your taste, but there is no need to say how bad it is.

Many people find grammer an impossibility, like myself. I can't spell and I put it in all the wrong places. That doesn't mean I don't have any skill at the subject. So there is no need to be that way

My critique... I had some, but I deleted it before I posted. I'll put it back up:

1) Probably what bugs me the most is that there aren't any paragraphs. You should begin a new one every time someone speaks.
2) This doesn't work as a CS pet journal. There's no forums, no owners, no members or anything like that. It's basically a same-old high school journal, but with dogs.
I'm sorry if I came across as rude. Which I was. Thank you for telling me.

[Confidential Ness]

CS pet journal's, are CS pets that basicly go to school or something of the sort. They are rather common around the forums. That's basicly what they are.

Cs pet high school journal's. They are mostly very succesful peice's on CS, which is likely one reason why Kimmy chose to make one.

Are they? When I've read them... but that was a long time ago. I should stop expecting everyone's CS stories to have the same real-life internet as my in-progress work.

[brambletalon98]

CS pet journal's, are CS pets that basicly go to school or something of the sort. They are rather common around the forums. That's basicly what they are.

Cs pet high school journal's. They are mostly very succesful peice's on CS, which is likely one reason why Kimmy chose to make one.

Yep, thats what they are. Som are based on the pets daily life, sometimes the routine around maybe what the pet looks like. for example, the Lion king from the medieval fair could be about how it feels like to be king and the love life the pet had. but how am I supposed to know, Im just a RPer :p

[kimmy1479]

Actually he is probably right about most of this. XD I know I didn't put anything into paragraphs, but I do sometimes. I didn't because I was trying to use Write or Die and so I was just writing fast. However, the characters have personalities, though Chica is more of a random background character.
Kayla- Obsessively cheery, and apparently never done anything bad in her life.
Stripe- Immature, funny, and breaks rules ALL the time.
Jennel- She is kinda the smart, all around epic person.
Skandal- Jerky dude with anger issues.

Though really, I did this more for fun than for anything else. Just something I could go random on, you know? XD Usually I'm a perfectionist with my writing, but I decided to make a story where I could just write anything and be all random and stuff. There are probably like 2 entries where I actually tried to make it good, but usually I just write it because its fun to write like this.

Most CS pet journals don't have owners. There more just fictional journals about 1 of your pets. I don't really know what you mean about 'members' or 'forums' though.

And, besides when I make up words, like pepperoni-y, all the spelling should be right, I used Spell Check.

And I know its cliche'. XD Most of the time I try to be original, but I had major writers block after she began 'wallowing' so I decided just to write and see what came out. And that did.
Also, shes in 7th Grade, not High School. XD

If I was *really* writing a story or something, I swear I would have used all of those things you posted, and it wouldn't have been nearly as bad as this journal, but I use this just to kinda have fun with it, and just do whatever, so I wasn't really trying to make this top notch or anything. Its just something to get creative juices flowing, and to have fun with.

[Jayflight.]

i can't believe you hate this,Confidential Ness i mean have you even read all the entries? this is the best journal i've read anyway you should just go away if ya don't like it,no point torturing yourself coming back to this 'badly written story' im sorry if this is coming off rude but you were being rude to one of my fav writers!(btw kimmy i don't think this is a badly written storry,i really love it)i really don't mean to be rude but there really is no point in bringing someone down, is there?

[hollowmello]

*observing quietly*
Happy Thanksgiving every one! (well i have thanks giving!)