• A poet's clouded mind - poems from an aspiring young poet

[livingdeadhorror]

Bump

[livingdeadhorror]

Perhaps being lost
Is more than a state of mind
It is a home
A mere being
Much like you and me
Drifting
Isolation
Confusion
Unknowing.

[livingdeadhorror]

Bump! Posting some writing

[livingdeadhorror]

The only person I will ever adore and be in love with is my Boyfriend and I cant even begin to describe why, or even how it happened. Its one of those things that just blossoms and blooms; neither of us could stop it and we both wanted it, needed it.

It was college, the setting where we met. The first person I spoke to, waiting outside of our fine art class. He made me laugh and was my first friend in college, we clicked and ignited as soon as I met his eyes. For a while I tried to ween myself off him, I couldn't stay away. I'll never find someone like him in a lifetime.

One thing for sure, I know I will never stop loving him, I always will. I love his personality, his cold wit. His brutality- at times it may hurt me, but I mostly love his honesty; no matter how blunt. It's just how he is. I love his humour, how despite it may be dark- it teaches me to never take anything too seriously. I love messing up his dark hair. I love his grey eyes, how they decode me and understand through just one glance. I love how he smiles and how he talks, I love the sound of his voice, Its better than any cheap love song. I love how he may not understand me. I'm in love with his eyes, I'm in love with his soul; I'm so lucky. That I can't answer why he would begin to love me back; I'm not too fond of myself. but I think he loves me because I am who I am, at times I may be very destructive. I fear he may not know me at all. I am also kindhearted, sensitive, loving, not a spiteful bone in my body. It's almost like some days we can't stand each other.

I wish I could read his mind to know what to say or what to do, but I don't think thats what our love is. its unpredictable. Its unspoken, its the quick looks, quiet laughter and fumbling, nervous hands. I live in him and I feel emotions too strongly. I accept him completely, I want to break down walls with him and create and LIVE for him, and for myself. I almost feel like there is no essence of belonging to me with the word "home". He is my home, I don't belong in my bedroom; that reflects my growing up life and how I fought my way through school. My interests don't truly reflect me like my lover, never stop going until I ignite my flame.

What my lover doesn't know, if anything, is all the horrible unkind things I have said.
I became the words I once gossiped.
I change. But that change happens and I can't control it. I wonder what colour they see me as. I wonder what five things they relate me to. I think about how many messages are typed, yet never sent to me, as the small details mean the most. I am the sunset that everyone looks at, that everyone captures- but they will never appreciate my true colours. I constantly change in a split. I destroy; more times than I'd like. I bring ends to a lot of things. I cut ties so fast. Like i'm a pair of scissors to paper; faster than your brain when it changes in thought pattern, Faster than light. I become a ghost sometimes to people that I thought were the closest to me, maybe they never understood me or liked me from the start.

I already know that I have less than three friends that know the ins and outs of me, I'm unpredictable. My love, he knows me, for I know his passion for design, his messy art work, his comic book shirts, the way he composes himself. I like his film knowledge and his love for Tarantino films. I watch him, I want to know more and attach myself further to him. I like his complicated music taste, I Embrace his presence, as sometimes things aren't forever fairytales. I know his favourite colour, his dream job. I know that he skates- one time, in effort to steal some of his time, we went around skating- but I have a longboard. It went bad.

There's some things I don't know- his favourite song, his favourite band, where he wants to live, what his true love and passion is. The question he wants an answer to but might never know. What his favourite moment in his day is, if he prefers sunsets over sunrises, what his favourite planet is.

I remember telling him about everything. My past, my present, my ambitions for the ever-coming hurdling future. I don't think he knows that my writing is almost all about him. I remember all the times we hung out in my home town- he was my weekend and the friend I needed. He is my constant encouragement to keep on living, to keep on fighting through whatever life throws at me.

[livingdeadhorror]

Beep

[livingdeadhorror]

Anonymus

Who are you?
I can't recognise
you anymore
Your name doesnt register
to me anymore
You changed
And cut me off
Like peeling off
a stuck band-aid.
Is that all I am?
Will you throw me away?

[The Worst Username]

Hello! Worst from the Lazy Writers here.

I've only read the poems on your first post, but I like them. Some of the lines are awkward and a few seem out of nowhere, but overall, you've got a lot of creative symbolism and tons of beautiful imagery. I especially like "Wire & Wool" and "Flower Arrangements". I hate to be the commenter who leaves generic compliments, but they've both got a lot of feeling poured into them.

[livingdeadhorror]

Hello! Worst from the Lazy Writers here.

I've only read the poems on your first post, but I like them. Some of the lines are awkward and a few seem out of nowhere, but overall, you've got a lot of creative symbolism and tons of beautiful imagery. I especially like "Wire & Wool" and "Flower Arrangements". I hate to be the commenter who leaves generic compliments, but they've both got a lot of feeling poured into them.

Thank-you so much! yeah those two are probably my favourites! Yeah I need an editor I think bc i loose track of what i'm trying to put across and go in twenty diff ways- its so annoying haha

[hou5159]

i read the poems on the first page and they were really intresting and fun to read🎈

[livingdeadhorror]

i read the poems on the first page and they were really intresting and fun to read🎈

Thank-you!