The Critique Cafe- Need Active Critics!

[Atwood]

This is a critique for Tae!
Who the critique is for: Tae's Goennec form for Ruby
What you had to say about it:
It's a good start, and her story sounds interesting but believable so far. It's hard to critique when it's still so early in the process, but the main thing I'd suggest is having more on how the events in her story affect her. For example, her mother is disappointed with Ruby's colouration, and they're not very close because of this, but how does her mother's disappointment in her make Ruby feel? Does she have insecurities because of it, is she angry, or does she just tune it out and focus on her father's love for her instead? From Kam's description of what she looks for in the forms it seems personality and character development is key, so those would probably be the main things you'd want to focus on in the story. :3 The spelling/grammar looks fine apart from one use of 'too' where it should be 'to' ("she's great to just tell all your problems too"), and overall it's looking quite good. ^^

[Princess Luna]

This is a critique for Tae!
Who the critique is for: Tae's Goennec form for Ruby
What you had to say about it:
It's a good start, and her story sounds interesting but believable so far. It's hard to critique when it's still so early in the process, but the main thing I'd suggest is having more on how the events in her story affect her. For example, her mother is disappointed with Ruby's colouration, and they're not very close because of this, but how does her mother's disappointment in her make Ruby feel? Does she have insecurities because of it, is she angry, or does she just tune it out and focus on her father's love for her instead? From Kam's description of what she looks for in the forms it seems personality and character development is key, so those would probably be the main things you'd want to focus on in the story. :3 The spelling/grammar looks fine apart from one use of 'too' where it should be 'to' ("she's great to just tell all your problems too"), and overall it's looking quite good. ^^

Alright, thanks; that helped a lot <3 I'll be sure to work on that.

Also, yeah, when I'm typing fast it's easy to mix 'too' and 'to' up; I'll go edit that :3

[iBrevity]

I would like some critique please!
Username: iBrevity.
Link to your form: Click.
Adoption Agency you are applying for: Kamaliah's Goennec Thread.
Deadline for your form: This Saturday.
Would you prefer to get feedback here or by PM? Here. <3


Thank you! I'll be swinging back around sometime soon to give critiques to other users.
And to anyone who is giving me commentary; keep in mind this is expanded and edited daily, so pages may be added onto the history. And be fore-warned that its a little long. ^^"

[LunarFaith]

I would like some critique please!
Username: Lunarflower
Link to your form: viewtopic.php?f=10&t=118117&p=3899982#p3899982
Adoption Agency you are applying for: ~Goennec~
Deadline for your form: This sunday (April 18th)
Would you prefer to get feedback here or by PM? PM Please

[Papyrsatyr]

Please do not repost forms unless you have updated them and want critique on the new part of the form.

[LunarFaith]

Oups, sorry... Didnt know

[Papyrsatyr]

It's fine we all make mistakes or forget to read the rules....just don't do it again please. ^ ^

And I'm surprised other people want the space for Mila the mascot. I need to fix the third post soon.

[LunarFaith]

I wont, promise^^

So can i critique other peoples forms?

[Papyrsatyr]

Yes you may. But please read the rules and FAQ...as it was stated there in the first place.

[KinqBoo]

I would like some critique please!
Username: Frostedmoon
Link to your form: viewtopic.php?f=10&t=120564&start=780
Adoption Agency you are applying for: Sparkle, Gloom, Scene, and Unloved Adoption Center
Deadline for your form: Not sure ^^;;
Would you prefer to get feedback here or by PM? PM please.