Tail three/current life - I'm Not Running (No, Not Running)

[SilverSamurai]

Nearly a month has passed since then, and Kozmotis has improved significantly. We have settled in with Hunter and Abuto, they insisting on us staying, and Kozmotis more than willing to comply.

I, however, grew more anxious by the day, remembering the ‘mission’ I was supposed to be on, and the thought of Luken growing impatient for my return made me uncomfortable.

Kozmotis had opened up about her story as well, and I was right to not trust Luken’s story. Her origin, however, made Hunter and Abuto uneasy about accepting her into the pack, afraid that she would return to the Lab with information for her father. I think Hunter was more upset by the thought of sheltering someone that had worked for such a man.

Kozmotis pulled me to the side one morning, which was a surprise. She had been looking at me funny for the past few days, but whenever I confronted her about it she always became passive aggressive and snarky. “Hey Atlas, can I tell you something?” she asked, catching my attention. “Sure, what is it?” She glanced around, pulling me to the side of the clearing where we would not be heard easily.

“Listen, I think you deserve to know the truth…” She started, but trailed off, obviously uncomfortable by whatever she was about to confess. “Hey,” I called to get her attention, and continued when she looked up, “I appreciate you wanting to the honest with me, but if you’re uncomfortable by it, you don’t have to-“ “I want to, I just don’t know where to start.” She cut me off, and sat back and waited for her to start.

Her voice was shaky at first, but grew more confident the more she said; “Shortly after I sent you out for your mission, I began thinking things over. I don’t know why the thoughts never occurred to me before, but they hurt. I thought over what I was doing; all this research, and for what? I’ve destroyed countless lives because of my research, and my father… Luken doesn’t even care. He takes the subjects in without remorse, and I’ve always turned a blind eye to it, but…

“But in that moment, everything came crashing down on me. I couldn’t continue working as I was, and I needed a way out.

“I tried to tell my father, but he wouldn’t listen… No, he listened fine, I guess he just didn’t care. I pleaded with him, but I hadn’t realized how cold he really is. I threatened to leave, but he told me I’d regret it… I broke my window that night and attempted to escape.

“I had made it outside, but I forgot about his warning… He had set bear traps out, and it was dark and I couldn’t see them-“

She trailed off, pain choking in her throat. That certainly makes more sense…. He hesitated for a minute but she continued, “The pain was… something else, to say the least. I’ve never quite experienced anything quite like that before, that’s for sure. I tried to get up, but Luken stood over me… I don’t how I ended up back in my room, but when I woke up I felt fear as I’ve never felt it before. I ran as fast as I could, ignoring the pain in my limp leg, and that’s when I bumped into you...

“I ran for as long as I could, but my legs gave out. I’m not sure how you manage to run like that,” she paused, amusement filling her eyes for a moment. “When I woke up, I was here. I’m thankful for these stranger’s help, but Oh, I’m sorry, Atlas. I shouldn’t have left you to face him alone.” I shook my head in disbelief, “No, I’m fine. Luken… Didn’t hurt me as much, and I made it out alright.” I replied, chuckling at our current situation.

“Speaking of Luken, I better be getting back soon…” I murmured catching Kozmotis’ sorrowful gaze. Her eyes went wide and she protested immediately; “What- No, you can’t! Not after what that man has done!” She cried, and I shook my head.

“That’s why I have to go back, Kozmotis. He sent me back out on a mission; a mission to find you, and he’s expecting me to come back. As much as I’d love to stay here… I can’t put everyone else in danger because of me.” I said calmly, though a spark of worry ran through my head. Am I really ready to face him again?

Kozmotis didn’t reply, her gaze focused on the ground as I took a step backwards. “I’ll be back, I promise.” I said, and she looked up with hopeful eyes.

As I padded across the clearing, Kozmotis didn’t follow. I was greeted by an as usual over happy Abuto, who was rambling something about bird migrations. “I’m leaving for a while,” I told him, and Abuto screeched in disbelief. “You’re not going back, are you?” He asked, and I let out a heavy sigh.

Upon my second return to find Kozmotis, my secret had been slipped; Hunter and Abuto knew about my position, what I was to Luken, and what he expected of me. I, however, had reassured them that I wanted no part of it and wished to remain neutral, if not on Hunter’s side. They were surprised to say the least, but trusted me nonetheless. They had gotten to know the real me before the information slipped, after all.

Hunter strolled out of his den when Abuto had screeched. “Can you not be so noisy, songbird?” He mumbled with a wide yawn, but Abuto spun around to his friend, “Atlas is leaving!”

“I knew he would as some point,” Hunter sighed, and Abuto stiffened, “And you’re ok with that?” Abuto challenged his friend, but Hunter shook his head. “No, I think it’s an awful idea, and I really wish he’d stay, to be honest,” he paused and shifted his gaze to me before continuing, “but he knows what’s best for him.”

Abuto didn’t protest further. I nodded in appreciation to Hunter, “I’ll be back,” I told him sternly. The taller Viscet’s eyes narrowed, but his voice was playful, “You better be, Atlas. I’m holding you to it.”

I began to make my way out of the large clearing, chancing one last glance back at my friends. Kozmotis was now lying under one of the trees, her head resting on her paws, not looking at me. Hunter had a smile on his face, as Abuto waived his arm like a palm tree in a hurricane next to him.

With a heavy sigh, I made the trek back to the Lab.

[SilverSamurai]

The moon shone cold and silver in the sky, making the large stone building appear to be glowing in the field. My legs ached from the long journey, but it wasn’t an uncomfortable pain. It was kind of reassuring in a way, a reminder that I’m alive.

No little surprise, Lilith was waiting at the doors for my return. They spoke as soon as I was within earshot, “What are you doing here, dear??” I was taken aback at their tone, it was almost… sad. How ironic, I thought.

“I have to be here,” I told them, quickly adding; “Why are you so surprised? You’re the one who put me in this place to begin with.” They seemed to accept the accusation at this point; we both knew it wasn’t a lie any more.

“You didn’t have to come back, is what I’m getting at.” Lilith responded sharply, a dangerous glint in their eyes. I laughed, “But I did. If I didn’t Luken would probably have put everyone else in danger, not just myself. He would find us, eventually.” I explained, but they didn’t seem to understand.

“Is this what you want?” They asked, genuine concern in their voice for the first time in generations. “Don’t ‘ya think it’s a bit late to be asking me that?” I sneered, being the one to raise my wrist, the String dangling to the ground freely and without tangle. Lilith was speechless. “I know what I’m doing,” I growled and pushed past them, opening the doors and reentering the Lab.

“I sure hope so, my dear.” Came the Shinigami’s sad response.

The doors closed with a loud click, setting off an alarm that startled me. That was new… Within seconds, Luken stood in front of me, shouting a command to shut off the alarms. He spoke those same words that I hated so much;

“Welcome back, Atlas.”

______________


“What do you mean, she’s gone?!” Luken screeched from across the table, his tail tapping against the ground in frustration. “Just that,” I said calmly, “I did find her, but she was dead before I could get to her.”

“So why didn’t you bring her back?” He yelped, his eyes narrowing. “Because she wasn’t alive, Luken.” I stated once more, my voice rising to meet his. “She can’t be gone…” His voice reduced to a mere whisper, voice threatening to crack. I never thought I’d have such a thought, but in this moment I could understand the dark Viscet.

I knew all too well the pain of losing a daughter, and close to her or not, once she was gone there was nothing you could to but gawk and hide in denial. So when Luken’s next words came, it twisted knots into my stomach.

“Go bring her back! What was that Mage’s name? Ai? Akou? Aiakos?” My muscles tensed and anger swelled within me. No, I won’t let that happen again. I refuse to get him involved yet again. I thought over another lie, “I’ve heard Aiakos has traveled over seas to further his quest for knowledge, though.”

Luken really would does believe everything he hears, it seemed.

After several moments, the dark male across from me let out a heavy sigh. “What a shame,” he murmured, “looks like I’ll have to find another researcher.” He said, and fire rose in my throat.

Is that really what he’s concerned about?

I guess it’s best to know how he really feels…. Should I tell Kozmotis?

… No, she’s probably best off knowing. She deserves to keep her memories of her adoptive father as positive as possible.

Guess I’ve got another secret to keep, I chuckled to myself.

___________________________________________________

Nearly three months have passed since my last mission and Luken’s… ‘loss’. He’s already set out to find another assistant, and it pains me to see how fast he’s forgotten about his daughter.

I wonder if he were to live several lives if he would, too, come to regret things he’s done In the past. It was hard to say.

For now, I do busy work in maintaining the Lab, bringing me back to my early Castle days of playing housekeeper.

Lilith seems to appear more frequently now, only to urge me to run, their original role seemingly forgotten at this point and only concerned for my safety. Though, thinking back, it was probably just due to Lilith’s distaste of Luken; not wanting the dark male before they have to opportunity to. Morbid, I guess, but in a way it was kind of bittersweet. At least I knew they had my back now, perhaps even willing to step in if need be.

Luken keeps a close eye on me, but with good reason. I’m often caught looking out windows longingly, and he’s probably fearful I’ll take after his daughter in that regard. I know better than that, though.

The days are long and tiring, and my mind often wanders to Hunter and Abuto, wondering how Kozmotis it. …. How Chronos is fairing, and even Nanashi at that. I’ve… made some mistakes in the past, that’s for sure. But I’m not sure that if given the opportunity to go back and redo everything if I would necessarily change anything.

Everything so far has played out for a reason, and I’m determined to see where this life takes me.

And my next ones at that.

Though for now, I live in the middle of the conflict as it stands; Luken versus Hunter’s pack, and I truly fear the day the two clash when war erupts. It’s bound to happen at some point, but I am not looking forward to when the day arises.




I am loyal to Hunter and his cause; providing shelter for those who need it from Luken, and yet… I have to remain under the control of Luken, at least for the time being. It’s complicated I guess, but I feel better knowing that I’m here to mediate things when tensions are high, and I know better than anyone that I can stand up to Luken if need be.

When sent out on missions every couple of months, I use the time to stay with Hunter’s pack, enjoying the sense of family I have there. I return back to the Lab when my ‘mission’ is over, and make up a report to give to Luken upon my arrival. It’s worked out so far, and I don’t plan on stopping any time soon,

While it pains me to continue living here with Luken, I get by ok. It’s a bit boring at times, ok, most of the time, but I’m glad it’s me here and not someone else who would be too afraid to stand up to Luken’s wrath.

Am I content in this life? No, not quite. However, I’m not entirely disappointed either. A majority of this mess is my fault some how or another, and am reminded by it every time I feel the chains around my neck.


But I wouldn’t have it any other way.

[SilverSamurai]

Back to main form - Life one- Life Two - Life Three

Additional information;;
- Part of Kozmotis' Point of View
- Abuto's Point of View

by yugi