[Oddly Shaded]

Color: Light Grey Docksen
Markings:
Leasuire Armor - White with grey muzzle
Legs - Grey (ankles)
Underbelly - White
Fins - White and Grey Solid
Eyes - Blinde
Horns/Hooves: Bone Creme
Rarity: Uncommon
Gender: Female
Height (in hh): 17hh

Adopt by posting the Best Story - The story must be about how this girl became blinde. It must also include when she was a fawn - Ends on the 5th of January

Code: Select all

[b]Username:[/b]
[b]Name:[/b]
[b]Story[/b]

*Gender is Unchangeable*

[ban]

Username:
EpicalMe
Name:
Ash
Story
Born into severe poverty; Ash didn't know much of a normal life. The wild herd she was brought into was suffering a great famine, and food was severely scarce. She had a twin, but he only lived but a week. He starved to death; never even got a chance to taste food. Ash was predicted to follow suit, very weak and malnourished.
But she proved everyone wrong; and each day lived to see the light. She managed to eat just enough food to keep her alive; and she did live. Though, due to the severe malnourishment she went blind and was thrust into a world of darkness. Ash always felt confused and lost but pushed through her troubles until a better day came and food slowly began to be more plentiful.
Bad days got better, but being blind put Ash back and no one really associated with her by choice. She was naturally quiet anyway so she wasn't bothered. Being alone just gave her more time to adjust to relying on other senses. Before Ash was but a year old she could navigate just as well, if not better than any other docksen of her kind. To be completely honest, most were envious of her tracking skills. She would find things tens of times faster than anyone else could, even though she was by far not the strongest.
With time Ash began to long for companionship, like any young female her age. Though no suitors would even consider the blind docksen. She tried to remain strong and prove herself worthy of any of the males, but to much dismay it never proved successful. Loneliness gripped Ash until one day a suitor came after her. Overjoyed Ash jumped in too far, too fast. She fell for this male without any second thoughts and truly thought she was happy. But she didn't know he was not faithful and had a whole life outside of Ash's world. Oblivious, Ash just fell harder for him and once she found out she thought her world has collapsed.
She went through a deep depression; hardly eating, not moving much, not taking care of herself. She eventually bulked up and decided she would never trust a male again even though there was that ache for companionship still there.

[~Razzle~]

Username: ~Razzle~
Name: QuickSilver
Story

I wasn't always like this. No, I used to be healthy. I ran with the fastest of the herd, I played with the youngest of the fawns. But now I'm an outcast.

I laughed, my bright eyes darting about, as I pulled ahead of my friends. "Slowpokes!" I called, darting through the forest. "No fair!" I heard one of my friends call. "You have more legs!" I laughed. "Well, you have wings, so I wouldn't complain!" I called over my shoulder. I love this. Running as fast as I want with my friends. I wish childhood lasted forever, where your biggest worry is rocks in your hooves. The huge rock was nearing, the finish line for most of our races. Darting nimbly up the rock, I called out triumphantly, "Bum da da daaa! I win!" I grinned as my fellow fawns started running up the rock.
Life is good.

~~~~~

"QuickSilver? QuickSilver, wake up!" My mother prodded me urgently with her muzzle.
"What?" I grumbled, flicking my tail.
"We have to go! Hurry!" She said. I could hear the desperation in her voice.
"Why?" I asked, standing.
My mother looked me in the eye and said the word no Docksen wants to hear. "Fire."
I bolted out of our little cave all the Nymthics shared, running for my life.
I found the rest of the Nymthics - the Skyloretics were flying, the Aquatics swimming. They were all safe, but our only advantage was our speed and extra pair of legs. They were all running, away from our home, as fast as their six legs allowed them, but I skidded to a stop. "Mom!" I cried out, looking around. There she was, far behind me, running from the fire as fast as she could, but her age was taking the better of her. I turned around and ran back to the fire, to my mom.
Nosing her hip, I pushed her along, but it was hard. The fire was getting closer, faster. It was starting to lap at me, and I was getting more and more frantic. The smoke was heavy, and thick, and I could hardly breath. I wish I could say that I suddenly got a heroic burst of strength, pushing my mom to safety. But, that's not the case.
Fire nearing on us, I managed to push my mom into the river, but that was my last sight. The smoke got into my eyes, burning them, forcing tears out. I blindly made my way into the water with my mom, and lowered my head down, waiting for the fire to pass.
I hoped that the burning in my eyes would go away, I would suddenly see the water running along, but that didn't happen.

~~~~~

My eyes permanently burned, one of my Aquatic friends finally found us in the river, and pushed us to safety, but my eyes were damaged. I couldn't see at all, I lost my running reputation, and some of my friends turned their backs on me.
But I'm still alive, and so is my mom, and all of our herd. I will never be able to see, but I still have my friends, my family, and my herd.

~~~~~

And that, little foals, is why my eyes are white.

[wowhow]

Username:wowhow
Name: Nashki K'yuki
Story her eyes fluderred open as the first lights of dawn reached her and tickled her nose under the oak tree she had slept at the night before. she leaned towards the warm welcoming rays of light and closed her eyes once more, just the right temperature for her cold and wet fur. she licked the leaves she had picked precisly so they would collect dew drops will she slept and shook her head and tail in an attempt to shake herself free of the few fallen leaves and dew drops on her and gently stood up and picked her way carefully around the holes in the ground unsure if a snake or such lived in one and threaded around the many burned stumps and fried docksen laying motionless on the ground, at the same time scrutinizing the ground looking for another live docksen among her once living and full of energy classmates and elders. as she examined the lifeless corpse of her life long bully she did not feel any pain for any of the docksen,not because she pointly didn't care, but for the same reason why she didn't feel any pain when she looked at her dead brother; she had learned to only greave on misfortuned self-centered and arrogant living. she remember close to nothing of the night before when a struck of lighting had hit the great pine tree in the middle of the plain she called home; it had zapped through the trunk and seemed to have jumped from tree to docksen to docksen to docksen and so on and only missing her because she had already settled under her tree for the night and the bolt of lighting only seemed interested in the docksens and not the trees. the heat escaping from the surge of energy had been enough though to make herself dizzy and later on make her faint so she had missed most of the trategy. all of a sudden a faint movement escaped from a docksen a little apart from the others and in a pose as if the docksen had tried to fly away but had crashed before they had gone more then merely a few inches in the stuffy air. as she looked at the barely moving docksen out of the corner of her eye she noticed that it was a broad stag (stag right?) not much taller than she and he reminded her of somebody but she could not seem to remember who. she examined for a few more minutes the truly dead docksen then stagerred and wove around the burned docksen to the shaking handsome stag, as she aproached he flicked his ears her way then slowly and gently turned his slightly burned face to face her she suddenly realized it was one of the upturned show off popular stags that took there beauty as a pass for everything- obviously this one would never see things the same way. she suddenly had a flash back of when she was a fawn- she stood at the edge of the group of fawns that had gathered around a young male fawn-the stag she had in front of her now- that was prancing around showing off in front of the more popular and baby faced females and nosing a few of them as if trying to lure them with him and completly ignoring her as if she was merely a space of air, which had and until recently had been somewhat true as she had been ignored her whole life, she stared at him for some while but not long enough for anybody to notice for he was one of the gentler, more caring, and handsomer stags of the popular group and... suddenly her thought faded and she halted as she woke up of her trance like state. she slowly started again towards the stag now knowing who he was and, when she reached him, leaned down and sniffed him to make sure he was alive noting, with mixed emotions, that he was alive she nudged his head and rearanged his wings where they would not be at a painful and weird angle. as she watched him slowly get into a more comfortable laying position she completly ignored the snaping sound behind her. when he finally was laying comfortably she turned around because the snapping sound was getting louder, that's when she saw what was making that noise...The Great Pine Tree... she shouted a warning and the stag jumped, on wobelly legs, out of the way, as soon as she knew he was safe she started to run but hesitated and looked back so to make sure that she was not going to be crushed by its enormous trunk; to late though because all of a sudden all went black... she still had her senses but one...and that one sense had been swipt by a dead tree,she.was.blind.her eyes filled up with tears as her eyes started to turn a porcelain color; she was a blind nymthic...nymthic survived because of their sight...so besides if the stag offered help, which she highly douted, she would die. something had broken inside her though....something big enough that made her stager and claps.something that made every single milky hair on her back prickle with fear and make her hope...hope that if she fluttered her eyes that maybe,just maybe, her eyes would be normal again. she felt a shadow loom over her and a soft breath whisper to her but she heard nothing of what she had just been told besides five small but strong words, "...trust me, i will help..." and she finally closed her eyes and leaned against Nikayko,for that was the stags name, her only connection with sight.

[Notichimtoki]

Username:~*_MoonStar_*~
Name:Cielo (Italian for Sky)
Story

I blinked open my eyes, looking at the surrounding world. The dull green of the fading grass intertwined with the bright fall colors, and I looked up to see my mother above me. Beautiful, light brown, with a light creme muzzle. She smiled at me and I at her, the wind causing me to shiver. She snuggled closer to me, and I pressed into her warm body.
It wasn't long before I was up and moving, running with the wind, chasing the streams of light before the clouds hid them from me. I would race upstream, the fish jumping in the river happily. Leaping over fallen logs, finding myself flying. I was always on the move. My mother could never keep me still.
"Cielo." she would tell me. "You must stay with the herd. You never know what could happen."
I would respond with a yes and a nod, maybe a promise, but I would never listen to my mother. I always felt like she never understood the way the wind ran through my fur, causing me to shiver, or the way that the sky played tag with me, the way I leapt over a fallen log and found myself flying.
She just doesn't understand I told myself. How could she? All she ever does is talk with my father, stay home, and eat grass. I barely see her run, ever! Even when the herd is migrating!!
One day, I made the mistake of asking my mother why she wouldn't let me run.
I was older now, my horns were just starting to peek through the top of my head! I felt as though I could take on the world. My mother spat those dreams back in my face. If only I had the sense to see she was right all along.
"Understand, Cielo: I don't want you going anywhere away from the herd. I'm your mother, you're still just a foal."
I wanted to spit, I was so mad. Me? A foal?!
"Foals have stubs for legs, and their horns haven't even though about taking shape, much less peeking out! I am no foal. My legs are strong and my antlers are halfway grown."
"You're still not mature enough. When your antlers have fully grown then you will be ready for an adventure. Up until that point you are to stay with the herd. Is that understood?" she asked me.
I frowned, wanting to yell something witty back. But fueling the fire wouldn't help. So I lowered my head, half in respect, half in depression, and whispered.
"Yes mother."
Of course that next night...
"Cielo!" he whispered. He was a handsome Nymthic docksen, a handsome chestnut bay color, with great creme horns that were almost done. He was a few months older then myself and the handsomest docksen I think I had ever seen. His name was Sebastian.
"Come on!" he whispered excitedly. "I want to show you something!!"
Our herd had stopped in a canyon, each wall was covered in rocks. My mother had warned me to stay away. Earlier I saw a male snap at a fawn for going to close to the wall.
Now Sebastian was beckoning up it.
"Come on!" he whispered again. "The moon looks so beautiful from the top!"
"Sebastian," I whispered back. "I-I don't know about this! Everyone's so on edge about this... I just don't want to see anyone get hurt."
"Babe." he said, nuzzling me. "You worry to much. We'll be fine! Now are you coming or what?"
I frowned still unsure. His handsome eyes changed my heart. "Fine." I said gruffly, and began to follow him up the uneven path.
By the time we reached the top, my hooves were aching and my neck was stiff from looking up to make sure I was on the right path.
But the sight took my breath away. It was as if the canyon walls rose above everything else.
Trees covered the earth below, stretching on for miles and miles, a small river snaked it's way through the forest. I turned and what I saw took my breath away again.

Houses.
Tons and tons of houses and stables, closed cramped places, tiny spaces, no room to run as you pleased, no room to socialize. The herd would be torn apart and sent to different areas. I could feel my heart in my chest, beating menacingly, threatening to pull out of my chest.
My herd was headed straight for a trap.
"Quick!" I said, beginning to make my way down the canyon walls. "We have to warn everybody else!!"
Sebastian nodded, coming up behind me as we quickly picked our way down the trail.

And I fell.

The rocks and stones tore into my fur, my beautiful silky fur. Rubble and bugs clung to it, giving no sign of letting go. I tripped on my front legs, they collapsed in front of me, my second pair following through before all that remained in the air was my back legs. I cried out in pain as a jagged stone cut through my fur like paper, giving me a nasty cut on my elbow.

"Cielo!!!" I heard Sebastian shout as I flipped on to my back. I shut my eyes very tightly and kept them shut until I felt a pair of rocks smash their way into my eyes. I screamed in pain, it ran it's way up my spine, sending me an awful message.

I attempted to brush my face with my hoof but to no avail. I least I had stopped bouncing.

I became blind.
Though I was able to warn my herd in time, not listening to my mother cost me my eyesight, which I miss very much now. Sebastian and I broke up, years ago. But we're good friends.
He now has a wife and a fawn, but I am left alone.
Being blind means that I can no longer run, that I can no longer jump or feel the wind running freely against me, not like the way it is when you run with a bunch of sweaty docksens around you.

I am alone.

[Oddly Shaded]

Lovely guys :3 This will end on the 5th :3

[wowhow]

okay thanks

[Oddly Shaded]

Ends today i will give everyone 1 hour to complete WIP's and edits.

[Oddly Shaded]

Username:~*_MoonStar_*~
Name:Cielo (Italian for Sky)
Story

I blinked open my eyes, looking at the surrounding world. The dull green of the fading grass intertwined with the bright fall colors, and I looked up to see my mother above me. Beautiful, light brown, with a light creme muzzle. She smiled at me and I at her, the wind causing me to shiver. She snuggled closer to me, and I pressed into her warm body.
It wasn't long before I was up and moving, running with the wind, chasing the streams of light before the clouds hid them from me. I would race upstream, the fish jumping in the river happily. Leaping over fallen logs, finding myself flying. I was always on the move. My mother could never keep me still.
"Cielo." she would tell me. "You must stay with the herd. You never know what could happen."
I would respond with a yes and a nod, maybe a promise, but I would never listen to my mother. I always felt like she never understood the way the wind ran through my fur, causing me to shiver, or the way that the sky played tag with me, the way I leapt over a fallen log and found myself flying.
She just doesn't understand I told myself. How could she? All she ever does is talk with my father, stay home, and eat grass. I barely see her run, ever! Even when the herd is migrating!!
One day, I made the mistake of asking my mother why she wouldn't let me run.
I was older now, my horns were just starting to peek through the top of my head! I felt as though I could take on the world. My mother spat those dreams back in my face. If only I had the sense to see she was right all along.
"Understand, Cielo: I don't want you going anywhere away from the herd. I'm your mother, you're still just a foal."
I wanted to spit, I was so mad. Me? A foal?!
"Foals have stubs for legs, and their horns haven't even though about taking shape, much less peeking out! I am no foal. My legs are strong and my antlers are halfway grown."
"You're still not mature enough. When your antlers have fully grown then you will be ready for an adventure. Up until that point you are to stay with the herd. Is that understood?" she asked me.
I frowned, wanting to yell something witty back. But fueling the fire wouldn't help. So I lowered my head, half in respect, half in depression, and whispered.
"Yes mother."
Of course that next night...
"Cielo!" he whispered. He was a handsome Nymthic docksen, a handsome chestnut bay color, with great creme horns that were almost done. He was a few months older then myself and the handsomest docksen I think I had ever seen. His name was Sebastian.
"Come on!" he whispered excitedly. "I want to show you something!!"
Our herd had stopped in a canyon, each wall was covered in rocks. My mother had warned me to stay away. Earlier I saw a male snap at a fawn for going to close to the wall.
Now Sebastian was beckoning up it.
"Come on!" he whispered again. "The moon looks so beautiful from the top!"
"Sebastian," I whispered back. "I-I don't know about this! Everyone's so on edge about this... I just don't want to see anyone get hurt."
"Babe." he said, nuzzling me. "You worry to much. We'll be fine! Now are you coming or what?"
I frowned still unsure. His handsome eyes changed my heart. "Fine." I said gruffly, and began to follow him up the uneven path.
By the time we reached the top, my hooves were aching and my neck was stiff from looking up to make sure I was on the right path.
But the sight took my breath away. It was as if the canyon walls rose above everything else.
Trees covered the earth below, stretching on for miles and miles, a small river snaked it's way through the forest. I turned and what I saw took my breath away again.

Houses.
Tons and tons of houses and stables, closed cramped places, tiny spaces, no room to run as you pleased, no room to socialize. The herd would be torn apart and sent to different areas. I could feel my heart in my chest, beating menacingly, threatening to pull out of my chest.
My herd was headed straight for a trap.
"Quick!" I said, beginning to make my way down the canyon walls. "We have to warn everybody else!!"
Sebastian nodded, coming up behind me as we quickly picked our way down the trail.

And I fell.

The rocks and stones tore into my fur, my beautiful silky fur. Rubble and bugs clung to it, giving no sign of letting go. I tripped on my front legs, they collapsed in front of me, my second pair following through before all that remained in the air was my back legs. I cried out in pain as a jagged stone cut through my fur like paper, giving me a nasty cut on my elbow.

"Cielo!!!" I heard Sebastian shout as I flipped on to my back. I shut my eyes very tightly and kept them shut until I felt a pair of rocks smash their way into my eyes. I screamed in pain, it ran it's way up my spine, sending me an awful message.

I attempted to brush my face with my hoof but to no avail. I least I had stopped bouncing.

I became blind.
Though I was able to warn my herd in time, not listening to my mother cost me my eyesight, which I miss very much now. Sebastian and I broke up, years ago. But we're good friends.
He now has a wife and a fawn, but I am left alone.
Being blind means that I can no longer run, that I can no longer jump or feel the wind running freely against me, not like the way it is when you run with a bunch of sweaty docksens around you.

I am alone.

Congratz Moon Star :3 I just adored this story! It almost brought tears to my eyes!! It also reminded me a little of Spirit (the movie). So i love it just that little more. Congratz ;3 I may even make Sebastian. He sounds like a cool Docksen :3

[Notichimtoki]

~Wow!! Thank you!!