[avaloafe]

my child oh my gosh <3333

[avaloafe]

username; ajohanna
name; jasper
gender; male
biggest regret; i've always had a difficult time with my life growing up. i was home-schooled most of my life until i was old enough to go to high school. then i went there and it was my first time ever inside of a school. this is when my life started to go downhill. i struggled to fit in anywhere. even if i changed my personality to fit that clique, i was still discluded from the group's activities. when i didn't fit in, i got bullied. it wasn't really hitting me, but name calling and just being verbally abusive. it was the little things. mocking me when the teacher says something, which is something that i did, and having them point it out in a dumb voice. i did have a few people who stuck by me when things went bad. my mind went into the gutter. i felt like a failure to my parents, my friends, and myself. i thought that i was useless and i wasn't here for anything. my grades dropped, i was a super senior, until finally i just dropped out. my biggest regret is never believing in myself. i could've gotten somewhere if i put everyone behind me in high school. i could've gone to college. i've been thinking about it now that i have turned over a new leaf for my life.
226/500



extra; art and story told from jasper's point of view -

i'm currently a twenty three year old high school drop out. several weeks ago, i sent in some college applications for the first time in my life. i have to admit, the waiting is very stressful. i applied mainly for music production and learning all about the musical world. that is what interests me the most in my life. when i dropped out of school, my parents disowned me because thy thought i was a failure in their eyes. did it get to me? nah. i wasn't a fan of them anyway. all "up-tight" and "rich." that was defiantly not the life for me. so i left them and turned my mind to music. i was homeless for a few months, but instead of sitting around doing nothing, i figured that i should move forward in life. so, i cleaned myself up and went into a producing station and asked if i could have the chance at a job interview. i met with the manager that same day.

now this was a small producing station in the big city of new york. and, as you may know, this city has a LOT of stations. little did i know that this very one i was in now was one of THE best; but i just treated it like any other station. apparently that's what the manager liked in me. i didn't come to be "famous," but i came for the music. i was bluntly honest with him in my past, which also made me wonder if he liked honesty as well. he told me to come back in a few days and i'd have my answer.

now remember that at this time in my life, i'm an 18 year old kid trying to make a life.

a few days past and i came back all anxious, but i held my composure and attempted to calm myself down. when the manager came up to, he sighed and looked down and my heart instantly shattered. putting a hand on my shoulder, he laughed and said that i was hired. i really wish someone photographed that moment because my face was probably super ridiculous. i honestly was not expecting that job. the manager allowed me to live at the studio for free for a few months, but only to get me back on my feet and actually live a decent life.

i now own a little apartment a few blocks down from the studio and i have been working there for five years and have been promoted to assistant manager. everyone at the studio has been very helpful and supportive of me. each of my college letters have come in and i have opened all of them with my colleges. not a single letter said "congratulations!" out of the eight colleges, i didn't get accepted. i mean i expected that but it did hurt a little. but it doesn't matter to me. i have a job and an amazing family finally in my life.
500/500