what is your experience using tone tags?

[wyzrd]

i have noticed lots of people use tone tags and, not having much experience using them myself, i made this thread to get input from people who use them to hopefully glean some tips, and as a place for people to discuss their use of tone tags !
so please feel free to share what your experiences using tone tags have been like, what your thoughts are, your preferences, how you use them and etc ^^

feel free to leave an open question or prompt for people to answer or share about if you'd like!

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edits~

original title: what is your experience with/opinions on tone tags?
original message:
i've been visiting forums and online spaces more frequently lately, and so naturally, i've been thinking and worrying more about how to be understood well through text. i'm the type of person who worries a lot about offending, weirding out, or hurting people's feelings and so sometimes i really overthink the things i write.

lots of people seem to use tone tags, and so i want to do my part and use them as well if people find them helpful and if it would help get my message across easier. but, i've also heard that for some they aren't as useful and can be confusing. some tone tags, for instance /hj, can be really ambiguous and don't really help them understand intent, and others for instance /srs or /gen will be used sarcastically instead of with their actual meaning, which sounds really frustrating. (like for example someone says "thor 2 was the best movie i'd ever seen /srs" when they meant it sarcastically. textually they directly said that they actually really liked thor 2, when what they meant was that thor 2 sucked, leaving you to sort out the sarcasm after they explicitly implied that they were serious ??)

if you're interested in sharing i'd love to hear what your experiences with and thoughts are on tone tags, if they've helped you, how you use them, if you've found them frustrating or run into people who used them incorrectly, or other thoughts and comments etc
thanks !!

[cookiekin]

My experience with tone tags has been quite good honestly, granted I'm not often in an online space and instead use tone tags with my friends whenever we text. It helps a lot in dissolving tension and clarifying things.

However, I do see some misuse of them on tiktok and whatnot but most of the time it is accurate. So generally I think tone tags are really great.

[okabudge]

I really like the idea of tone tags in theory. I’m generally pretty good at reading tone in online spaces, but I sometimes find that I struggle conveying tone. I feel that tone tags would be helpful to clarify things.

Unfortunately, I’ve seen a lot of people use tone tags sarcastically or just completely opposite what they truly mean, which can muddy the waters of communication and create a lot of undue miscommunication. I’ve also had people feel like the usage of tone tags is belittling or patronizing to them- some also feel that they are unprofessional and unnecessary.

Not to mention, there isn’t really a universal list of what everything means. /S for some may mean “sarcastic” where others read /s as “serious.”

I’ve only been successful in using tone indicators in circles where usage of them is discussed beforehand and we have a set reference for what everything means. With this much coordination in using them in only a discord server, I highly doubt the entire internet will come to a consensus on them anytime soon.

TL;DR- I like them in theory, but in practice some work needs to be done in order to successfully implement them into online society.

[outro;tear]

As a nd person myself I think tone tags are pretty neat for people that need them!! Conveying tone through the internet is difficult and I like that people have found a way to express it in a short and neat way! I mean I don't need them myself and I don't like when they're used on me specifically .... I myself really bad at reading tone in general but thru the internet I've sort of figured it out just through years and years of experience haha

Also yes!! Hard agree on the misuse part of tone tags, I don't think they should be used sarcastically or be made fun of since they r genuinely useful for people that need them .

[slifer]

I don't really use them myself but, I still think their pretty helpful to some people! kinda annoying when people are incorrectly using them though, the whole point is to use "/srs" when it is a serious matter but they use it sarcastically which defeats the whole purpose of having tone tags in the first place if their being used wrongly.

[Serious.]

I think they look a little silly, I'm not sure why. I guess they make me feel like I'm chronically online 😭 Or maybe I'm just old. Usually I'll type out (jkjk) or (this is lighthearted I swear) or something like that so I can avoid using /j or /lh.

Btw I'm saying this as someone who's autistic and sometimes has a hard time understanding things on the internet. I love their purpose and I think it's great that people are using them more. But to me, I'd rather express my tone in different ways.

[BESM]

Not too sure how I really feel about them. A bit conflicted maybe, especially by how they've previously been handled by others on the internet. I already struggle with perceiving others' intentions correctly both in life and online due to being autistic, so in a more optimistic point of view on it I feel as if this concept originally came from a very warm place of heart from and for those like me. However, with the uncertainty that can always come with the internet, whenever people *do* use them around me it just feels like there's more of a chance that I'm being deceived by them. It could just be me, but heavier usage of it always puts me off a bit because of this. I think for those that you are trustworthy with, this system is much more heartfelt. Though at the end of the day, if it's helping others, then it is something that is important to me.

[wyzrd]

thank you for all the input everybody, i really appreciate it !

[frogfan]

dont know if youre still wanting responses but i honestly only use them with my online friends :)

some people i know want them used for specific things (/lh and /j). and i only really find myself needing to use them if i say something that could be confused for being serious when its really a joke. since we're friends, we know each others sense of humor more then strangers would and i dont have to use them if i know they would understand it was a joke

it can be off putting for me specifically if theyre used frequently in a conversation (by me or by others) because it can feel unnatural or stilted, be difficult to remember to use them, or even to remember what the acronyms mean. at the end of the day though i obviously prefer the people i communicate with to be comfortable, so i dont mind using them

[wyzrd]

dont know if youre still wanting responses but i honestly only use them with my online friends :)

some people i know want them used for specific things (/lh and /j). and i only really find myself needing to use them if i say something that could be confused for being serious when its really a joke. since we're friends, we know each others sense of humor more then strangers would and i dont have to use them if i know they would understand it was a joke

it can be off putting for me specifically if theyre used frequently in a conversation (by me or by others) because it can feel unnatural or stilted, be difficult to remember to use them, or even to remember what the acronyms mean. at the end of the day though i obviously prefer the people i communicate with to be comfortable, so i dont mind using them

i don't mind more responses, i'd say i have a better idea of their common usage now but i dont mind if people want to continue conversing or share something :)

yeah, it seems like a lot of people use tone tags especially in talking with people they know and have a good rapport with. sort of as a tool to help with clarity, in a way that everyone understands and has probably been discussed before/is just understood from talking together over time