Authors chat

[Woogwoo Wren]

Hi, Im a budding author. I just want this forum to be a place for authors to share stories and give each other tips. I'm currently writing 3 novels, with another beginning to form, and I have finished lots of stories for my younger brothers.

Here is the prologue of one of my stories. Fell free to give me TRITHFUL feed back, and tell me where I have gone wrong.

Prologue
“Come on, they’ll be back soon. We can’t be here when they get back,” Tom called through the window. His brother, Mark, jumped out.
“Those people are rich. This is the best haul we’ve had for ages,” He commented.
“Let’s go, they’re coming back. We can admire the riches at home,” Tom snapped.
The two brothers ran into the forest at the back of the village together. When they got there they headed to a large oak tree. Mark quickly shimmed up into the branches.
“Hand me up the loot, Tom,” he called down. Tom passed up the sack and climbed up after him. He brushed the leaves aside, revelling a trap door. He pushed it up and climbed through. In the tree was a well hidden hut. Mark was dumping the sack on the ground. He opened it and picked up a handful of gold and jewels.
“We’re rich!” he cried.
“We already were rich, Mark,” Tom said as he lit some candles. The glow from them lit up the hut. Hanging from the walls and roof were necklaces, pendants and bracelets. On a shelf in one corner there were rare books, large jewels, diamond hair pins and all manner of things. The floor had lots of bags and sacks full of gold coins and precious gems. In another corner there were two beds. The other two corners held the trap door, table and chairs. The table had food on it.
“Let’s celebrate, Tom,” Mark called. He was already at the table. Tom put the silk cloak he was holding on a hat stand beside the shelf then quickly went to join Mark at the table. Tom heaped his plate with a chunk of fresh bread, smeared it with fresh strawberry jam, and a scoop of spring salad. Mark went for the plum tart and apple crumble. After they had eaten, they sat admiring the loot they had got.
“One more big haul and we’ll retire,” Tom yawned.
“Yes, one more, and then we’ll find our sister,” Mark replied as he climbed into bed.
“It’ll be good to see her again.”
“Yes, it will be.”

So to all the authors out there, enjoy this thread!