Crushes, Boyfriends, and Girlfriends | V4

[Iduna]

I am so insecure about myself .
The guy I like is all amazing looking and an even more
amazing person (I volunteer with him , he's an absolute
angel ) , he hangs out with all the pretty girls ,
and I would say I'm decent but I'm so .. undeveloped ?
Like he would never even think of me as someone
of the same age ! I look like and 8 year old ! I know he
isn't shallow enough to only care about my appearance
but it's always considerable. I like him a lot , if he liked
me back it would be a miracle.

I used to be the same way, I hated it.
No worries, your time will come.
As for confidence, there's nothing I can do. It's a mental thing. For me, it was just like, I'm tired of being insecure, once I got over my insecurities my life just felt so much better. You have to be strong. Mentally, that is. You can do it!

You're so positive, it's really nice!

I agree though, confidence is definitely one of those things you have to work at. It's like everything in life. The more effort you put into understanding yourself and appreciating you for you, the more confident you'll feel. It's really hard though, and sometimes it takes while, but we can all get there.

[surfiez]

Ok thanks ;> I've been really nervous because we haven't even kissed yet and I haven't really ever kissed anyone 0-0 so I'm not sure what to do

Any tips? Do I just give him a peck or …???? And how long should it be

[paradise,]

ah, i've been looking for a thread like this, guess i should have checked the general discussion topic sooner cx

ok, so i'll call the guy i like a and the other girl g.

well, me and a have liked each other for a year and a half now, and have "dated" once before. there was a lot of problems during that year and a half, but it was better at times, and worse at times. anyway, we are currently friends, pretty good ones i would say. he knows i like him, and i know he likes me. so, today, he decides to ask our male teacher for advise on how to talk to this girl g, may i add in front of the whole class. he said he has a crush on her, and needs advice on how to talk to her. of course, i got a bit jealous, i mean, who wouldn't? cx
so, i was a bit upset after that, and didn't talk to him much for the rest of the class period. to make this story short, we were better by the end of the day. [i had gotten him mad earlier, so we both had cooled down.] then, later this night, he sends me a message asking for advice on how to talk to g. now, i'm wondering why he would ask me this, i mean we both like each other, why would i help him flirt with another girl?

i'm just wondering what i should do, also, i'm curious, do you think he is just trying to make me jealous?
any advice is appreciated, thank you! c:

How do you know that he is interested in you? Has he said it directly, or have you interpreted it from his actions?

Either way, regardless if he likes you, he may also like her at the same time. If dating you in the past did not work out, he might want to pursue a relationship that has, in his opinion, more potential.

yes, he has told me directly, and also has told me he loves me. might i add, i have told him the same thing. but, lets say things didn't exactly work out, meaning my parents didn't like him that much. i mean, it still hasn't deterred him from saying it, or refraining from complementing me all of the time. he also teases me, and annoys me on purpose.

and i would understand if he liked another girl, there is no harm in that. i was just wondering, why would he ask another girl he likes for advise on how to talk to another girl, it just doesn't make sense unless he either really trusts me opinion or wants me jealous.

[Casistrophic]

ah, i've been looking for a thread like this, guess i should have checked the general discussion topic sooner cx

ok, so i'll call the guy i like a and the other girl g.

well, me and a have liked each other for a year and a half now, and have "dated" once before. there was a lot of problems during that year and a half, but it was better at times, and worse at times. anyway, we are currently friends, pretty good ones i would say. he knows i like him, and i know he likes me. so, today, he decides to ask our male teacher for advise on how to talk to this girl g, may i add in front of the whole class. he said he has a crush on her, and needs advice on how to talk to her. of course, i got a bit jealous, i mean, who wouldn't? cx
so, i was a bit upset after that, and didn't talk to him much for the rest of the class period. to make this story short, we were better by the end of the day. [i had gotten him mad earlier, so we both had cooled down.] then, later this night, he sends me a message asking for advice on how to talk to g. now, i'm wondering why he would ask me this, i mean we both like each other, why would i help him flirt with another girl?

i'm just wondering what i should do, also, i'm curious, do you think he is just trying to make me jealous?
any advice is appreciated, thank you! c:

How do you know that he is interested in you? Has he said it directly, or have you interpreted it from his actions?

Either way, regardless if he likes you, he may also like her at the same time. If dating you in the past did not work out, he might want to pursue a relationship that has, in his opinion, more potential.

yes, he has told me directly, and also has told me he loves me. might i add, i have told him the same thing. but, lets say things didn't exactly work out, meaning my parents didn't like him that much. i mean, it still hasn't deterred him from saying it, or refraining from complementing me all of the time. he also teases me, and annoys me on purpose.

and i would understand if he liked another girl, there is no harm in that. i was just wondering, why would he ask another girl he likes for advise on how to talk to another girl, it just doesn't make sense unless he either really trusts me opinion or wants me jealous.

He might also be trying to send you the message that he is not going to follow up on these flirtatious advances and that he plans to pressure someone else.

[thunder shibe]

my crush asked me out yesterday <333

[Prince Endymion]

So I have had an interesting day with crushes today... my friends,A, a trans-bisexual man, even though in school we call him a her because, school... K, a bisexual female and C a panromantic lesbian were talking today and somehow the idea of me being shipped with A came up. Of course, it was a joke and I took no notice of it. But later on, K told me that A might actually have feelings for me. I was surprised, but wasn't like dying on the ground. We all tease A and he's a very interesting person to say the least. We joke around, and he knows it! K asked me if I'd ever go out with A and I said, 'Maybe I don't have feelings for him yet... though, later on I might!" So now, my Avatar OC Mika Mizuno and A's OC Kurro Baka are now secretly being shipped, saying how... I'm not supposed to know about A's crush! Kurrika is a cute name though! Later on I asked my straight friend L is she could ever see me shipped with someone for real and she said she shipped me with my bisexual friend S who everyone thinks is my boyfriend...

So yeah! I am being shipped with two of my friends!

And to help that, I was Jasmine in Aladdin. I once had a dream that at the wedding scene the Aladdin, was A instead of the boy who was supposed to be Aladdin!

I also can't talk to A with out feeling like I'm flirting even though I'm not. I feel that because K told me about this, everytime I speak to A I'm giving away the fact that I know about the crush. I don't feel that way towards A YET and I mean yet because I'm Demisexual. A crush might form... It feels weird... Can someone help me with this last part?

Can someone help me with the last part?

[thunderofthedrum]

I am so insecure about myself .
The guy I like is all amazing looking and an even more
amazing person (I volunteer with him , he's an absolute
angel ) , he hangs out with all the pretty girls ,
and I would say I'm decent but I'm so .. undeveloped ?
Like he would never even think of me as someone
of the same age ! I look like and 8 year old ! I know he
isn't shallow enough to only care about my appearance
but it's always considerable. I like him a lot , if he liked
me back it would be a miracle.

Being self conscious and insecure is entirely normal, especially as a teenager.
Sometimes it just takes time. I wasn't ridiculously insecure as a teen but neither have I ever been confident about myself and my body. Just growth, increasing maturity, more experience, those all help. Over time, you will slowly have positive experiences that re-enforce feeling okay about yourself. Yeah, there will be jerks, rude people, shallow people along the way, but there will also be good people and your priorities will shift away from little things like your chest size or what shoes you wear.

It sounds like you are self conscious of your body in that you mentioned being undeveloped. If that's the case, I can relate. I'm thin, small chested, and sometimes feel like a 12 year old boy. And you know what? Any guy who would have a problem with your chest size or something is not one you'd want to be with anyway. And I know people say that all the time, but I promise you it's absolutely true. I say that from multiple personal experiences. You may never be thrilled with your body but it sounds like you are still growing and filling out. At least strive to be comfortable in your own skin; that in itself is attractive. I'm still self conscious, my boyfriend is very self conscious, and yet we are happy with each other.

Ok thanks ;> I've been really nervous because we haven't even kissed yet and I haven't really ever kissed anyone 0-0 so I'm not sure what to do

Any tips? Do I just give him a peck or …???? And how long should it be

There are no magical rules.
Do whatever you feel most comfortable with. It's entirely fine to start with a peck.
What do you think we are going to tell you? Do you think there's some sort of rule for the first time?
Everyone is different.

There is no 'should'. It's not like he expects it to be specifically 3.5 seconds, involve a certain amount of movement, be at a precise spot down to the millimeter, etc. Even very experienced people will tell you that each new person is different and a new experience.

[Julia]

After keeping my hopes high for weeks, he now has a girlfriend. Oh wow ;n

[luxray;]

okay, I have a problem. I am a female, and I currently have a boyfriend of 11 months. The problem is, I'm beginning to believe that I have a crush on one of my female friends. My boyfriend knows this friend, but he's never met her in person. He's texted her a little bit, but they didn't really connect as friends. My boyfriend knows that I'm bi, but I don't know if I should tell him that I have a crush on one of my female friends that I'm very close to.
advice??

[thunderofthedrum]

okay, I have a problem. I am a female, and I currently have a boyfriend of 11 months. The problem is, I'm beginning to believe that I have a crush on one of my female friends. My boyfriend knows this friend, but he's never met her in person. He's texted her a little bit, but they didn't really connect as friends. My boyfriend knows that I'm bi, but I don't know if I should tell him that I have a crush on one of my female friends that I'm very close to.
advice??

In my opinion, I think the important thing is that you have a crush. Would you tell your boyfriend if it was a crush on another guy? How do you think he would feel about it?

I think you need to think about how strong that crush is, whether you'd want to act on it, how your friend feels (is there even a chance that she'd return your feelings?), and whether you still want to be with your boyfriend.

I personally don't feel it's fair to tell your boyfriend about every crush you might have on someone else. It might make him feel inadequate or threatened. I think it's something that YOU need to figure out. You need to figure how you feel in this situation and what you want your next move to be. Because if you tell him about it, that might suggest that you like her enough to feel you might choose her over him. Does that make sense? So you need to think about how serious your feelings are for each of them, their feelings for you, and what you want to do next.