TheComfortCorner | V.9

[Arlecchino ♡]

i hate my social anxiety. i hate how much effort it takes for me to send messages to random people even when it's literally the point of this game for trading, and how often i feel shut down when i don't receive a response.

sometimes it makes me feel like i don't exist and it sucks. it is no one's job to respond to me, so why does it hurt my feelings so bad?

[shinx.]

i feel like i'm dying ahkjrems my whole body aches, i cannot keep anything down, i've cried so many times over how much pain i'm in and yet my parents are still going to leave me home alone over night ;;
i can't even go to a friend's house because i've got a dog to look after but i can't even look after myself.
i'm so exhausted and tired.

[tricerahttps]

.

[stellulite]

first time being unable to get out of bed for twelve hours in years.
i don’t want to go through this again.

[Guest]

just realized i have to spend new years without you.
great. and i was finally done crying over you.

[viles]

• it's official. pudge will be gone some time in the next two weeks. i just,, ugh. i know pudge is their cat, but it's heartbreaking to think that i'll never see him again, or that i will but it won't be the same. i hope they take care of him. he's such a good cat,, they call him an ass a lot and it makes me mad sfkjhdskfh. i just,, aa i really want to cry but im not upset enough for it,, so i'm just,, dealing with this unpleasant feeling in my gut. idk i just,, want to take pictures of pudge but my phone's sort of broken and it's annoying to deal with and i'm already upset so i don't think it's a good idea for me to try to use it right now,, i'll miss him so much.
  
  edit: i thought i was done but,,, sjdkhjf idk i have more to say. yk pudge and i have been roommates for over three years. like, we've had issues, sure, but idk. i guess,, i just saw a lot of myself in him? idk is that weird to say about a cat? like,, everyone else in the house talks about how mean he is and how he tries to bite them when they pet him, and like, idk i've seen him do it. he wants attention but when he gets it, he just,,, can't handle it. i feel like i understand him in a way that my sibling doesn't. LIKE,,, OH when the cat that was staying here for a few nights,, they were in a crate next to one of pudge's litter boxes, and the poor dude, he started meowing at me,, and i couldn't figure out what was going on,, and then he went to the bathroom on some of my clothes skjfhksf and i just,, i remember when i told my sibling about that,, they were like,, So Upset,, but i was like,,, 'why???' like it was so clear to me how stressed pudge was because of the other cat. i tried explaining that to them,, but they just couldn't see it, or at least they didn't tell me if they understood. idk. i just,, i know they love him and that they'll take care of him in his new home,, i just,, aaa their priority will always be their dogs. and i just,,, i think pudge deserves to be a Main Priority Pet yk? but idk there's nothing i can do. i'm just, gonna try to enjoy the time i have left with him ig,, it's just hard bc every time i look at him i get reminded that he's moving out skjfkjh
  
  edit two: okay last thing and then i'm done. they're talking about taking another cat with them, one of the ones that pudge doesn't like. and i just,, aaa it makes me nervous that pudge is going to get stressed out living with another cat. i don't want him to be miserable ykyk,, i just,, honestly i'm mad. mad bc i feel like they don't even like pudge?? like i know they love him but like,, idk i think they'd change him if they could. like,, idk,, it just,, doesn't feel fair that they get to keep him. but sdjkfhkhf i gotta get over it bc that sort of thinking is A Spiral:tm:
  i know i said last thing but sdkjfhsdkfh idk i've been thinking a lot about when we took care of my cousin's cat for like,, a month. he was so sweet, and i got really attached. i had a breakdown when he left kjfhhd,, i just,, aa i've always loved cats and i get way too attached way too easily,, and like,, idk three years is a long time,, at this point pudge,,, he feels like family to me. but idk ig i just have to accept the fact that he isn't my family, not really......i hope i dont see my sibling at all,, i've been getting angry just thinking about them and like,, it's not really Justified Anger:tm: so i just,,, need some time to deal with it so i don't take it out on them ykyk,, i love them, i do,,, i just, idk,, i think i love pudge more

[sodatab]

go cry loser.

[Soy Sauce]

I get so jealous. I get jealous because you guys do all the stuff I want to do with you. You guys hang out and you sound like your having fun. I come over and go to bed at like 10. You guys stay up all night doing the stuff i wish i had someone to do with. No. The stuff I wish I could do with you. Do you have fun like that with me? Even tho all I do is get bored easy? I cant sit through a movie, i cant stay up late, im bad at video games, i dont go outside, i dont do anything. Im boring. I love hanging out with you and im never ungrateful. I just get jealous and nervous that you dont like hanging out with me. Idk it was stupid anyway

[shinx.]

i think something is wrong i’m so mad at my parents for leaving me alone 😭😭 i’ve never felt more sick. it’s 5am, i woke up absolutely shaking and coughing so bad and went downstairs to get a drink and medicine and once i tried to take the medicine i threw everything up.
i don’t feel right and everything hurts and i can’t eat anything): literally or even drink anything ):

[tea rose]

i'm tired of sugarcoating it and being afraid of looking mean. i genuinely hate people my age. having no friends physically feels like my heart being ripped out but i'm unable to feel bonded to anyone. it's going to be like this for the rest of my life.