by Winstalgia » Wed Aug 21, 2019 12:54 pm
A while ago my best friend (one of two, but that doesn't matter) told me she'd be moving in about 2-4 years. Just today I found out it's been cut to 6 months - a year. That's short. That's not long. And she's like, the best friend I've had in yearsssss. Like, years. I see her weekly and she's staying in the same state, but about 9 hours away and I can't drive for another year by myself, but even then, would I really be able to leave for a few days to see her?
I can't bear the thought of losing her. Which, I know she's gonna do everything possible to stay in touch with me, she thinks the same of me as I do her. But still. Messaging each other every day isn't the same as actually hanging out and going places...
I'm on the verge of crying. I know it's kinda far time-wise but I can't imagine my life w/out her. It's just hurting me atm.
I have this fear that only my two best friends know I have. It's the fear of abandonment. I think the root of it is my Father, and I have difficulty in relationships. When I was younger my Father left me and for a while we managed to stay in touch but one day he just slowed the calls down and it stopped altogether one night when I was waiting. I gave up with him. I don't even know if he's alive. And. I had found out he was living with some woman who had a daughter and I just felt,, hurt. Out of nowhere I'll believe that my friends are just gonna pick up and leave me. Which, I've told both of them. They won't intentionally leave me, but life goes against what you want sometimes.
I just don't wanna lose her, what if after she moves we rarely ever talk? Or she makes new friends and forgets about me?
I hate anxiety.
"𝕹𝖔𝖙 𝖆𝖑𝖑 𝖙𝖗𝖊𝖆𝖘𝖚𝖗𝖊"
adult Hi! Call me Rain or Wins! hope all is well.
I love philosophy, paradoxes, and thought
experiments. Fermi paradox is my favorite.
Really avid blink-182 fan! I love their music.
I also really like DnD and fantasy stuff.
Currently working on a visual novel!
"𝖎𝖘 𝖘𝖎𝖑𝖛𝖊𝖗 𝖆𝖓𝖉 𝖌𝖔𝖑𝖉."