| TheComfortCorner | v.5

[glistens]

I'm alone.
There is no reason for me to be anywhere anymore. I need to disappear.

[Zeee]

i post here way too much.
i'm not really looking for advice or replies in general, ofc feel free to say something if you want to, i mainly just need somewhere to rant and everyone i try to talk to just doesn't understand why i'm putting myself through all this. i've also ranted about the second paragraph so much on other threads, i've asked for so many pms on the subject before too but it's getting to be a huge weight on my shoulders and ranting is the only thing that can make it go away.
so... bear with me.

why do i even let myself get involved in drama and stupid stuff that i will ultimately just end up losing sleep over? i can't help but feel guilty when i talk about what people do that annoys me behind their backs and i get hate for it... but i can't confront them, even though i want to be able to talk to them face-to-face about all the stuff they do that makes me angry. i don't like being called a coward. but they don't understand that i don't even care anymore because all the hate in the world is not going to drive me to get involved in drama that will affect my health. the last time i had an argument with someone i couldn't sleep, i could barely eat because i felt sick whenever i thought about it and it was all that i thought about so i felt sick all the time until it was resolved [apparently resolved... thought we were cool, you up and block me. sick]. every time i scrolled past it i just wanted it off the face of the earth, because i got shaky and i felt like i was about to throw up. i don't like being called a coward and hiding behind anon but i have to, i don't like getting hate for deleting the posts but i have to.

besides that, why did i get myself involved with him again? i knew from the get-go that it'd just end up like the other five times we stopped talking and then started up again. 'i don't see a reason why we wouldn't still be talking by christmas! i promise we will' oh, um... what day is it? it's the 20th? 5 days until christmas? and erm... you're not talking to me! what a surprise, you've got 5 days to prove to me that you had a legitimate reason for disappearing for a month and if that doesn't happen then, well, guess what? i'm just done. but am i really? probably not, because i worry about him too much and i miss him too much. none of my friends understand that i can't just let go of him even though he's essentially treating me like crap whether its intentional or not. he knows that he needs to let me know when he can't talk to me or else i'll probably have a panic attack but yet he doesn't tell me. he really doesn't have 2 seconds to say 'oh, sorry, can't chat for a little while' or tell me why he's not replying? it's killing me, really, but i can't let go. 'oh, i deleted the app because i never used it.' yeah right, like i believe that... does he even miss me? if he did, he wouldn't stop talking to me for a month which makes me even more worried because he's not a liar. or maybe he is, who knows! i don't know anything about him anymore.

sigh.

[۵Ʋиιтʏ۵]

let me guess. it's just ignore ghostie until they go away day isn't it?
oh freaking well. might as well just go. it's not like anyone truly wants me around.
bye

I'm sorry that people are ignoring you however try not to let them get to you as your so much better than that and if they ignore you its their loss not yours because they lost the chance to talk to a truly lovely person and you will be able to find other friends out their who appreciate you so much more better as it really is the least you deserve however don't let them rule your mind and get you down as they aren't worth your time nor ever will be and I know its difficult to see at times but there is always someone out there who loves and respects you for who you are and you are wanted far more than you could ever imagine and if you ever feel like you need someone to talk to maybe send me a pm as you are wanted and you really do truly deserve better c:

i feel so morally upset right now. i need a pm.
if you really want to read my rant, copy/paste (it's below) into pastebin or something.
the situation is that my friends have made a 'secret gifting' thing, and we all planned to give it to this one girl.
okay, let's say that in this situation, the guy leading this whole fiasco is dubbed as 'L' and the girl is 'S'.
L has a really intense crush on S. he still denies it all the time, but he planned to get S a microphone since she didn't have one to use in our group chats.
i casually suggested that we could get S a cheap, working one around $25.
L told me that i was undercutting. he plans to get S a $140 professional microphone and several expensive rilakkuma plushies.
this is not just L's money - it's my money, and my other friends money too. the overall cost comes to around $230. it's very costly, to get all of these things just for one person.
S is a very nice person. i'd get her a $25 mic, but to go that far...
there's a fine line between supporting a friend and flat-out worshipping one.
i realized that our 'secret gifting' didn't only apply to S.
and i remembered the sweetest kid ever. let's call him Glasses.
Glasses is a very shy, outspoken guy. he sits around us in our after-school program and we always take him for granted. if we need a history book, he already has it. if we need an english book, he got it! he always helped me with algebra as well.
and i felt like Glasses deserves a gift, too.
Glasses is so sweet. he turns red if you compliment him; he's not used to compliments and praise. his family is very poor. he awkwardly hangs around in our table, but he can't help it. everyone was a 'Glasses' at one point. taken for granted, not knowing how to join in....
but because i'm selfish trash i can only allot $20~25 towards getting a gift from him.
and because of this my other friend, 'K', has to sell her old AoT merchandise in order to get money for his gift, too.
and you know what L says?
"S is top priority. we can gift the others in april."
you mean you don't care about Glasses, L?! you also take advantage of him. why can't we just appreciate a wholesomely good person for once instead of all of us being devoted to S as if she's some kind of higher god?!

If its not too late pming c:

I feel like I go through so much, I tell people about this but they hardly listen..
My friends have been acting like they're annoyed a lot of me
I don't feel.. the same on different websites like I used to
I don't think anyone really wants to be.. my friend

I'm sorry your friends are treating you this way as you deserve far better than that and you always have however perhaps it might be worth trying to talk to them a little as I'm sure they aren't angry with you sometimes it can be the case that something might have happened at home or with other situations and they might be a little bit upset but try to talk to them and ask them if they're alright I'm sure they don't mean to treat you like this and I know how you feel about people not wanting to be your friend however their is always people out there who would love to be your friend sometimes its just the case of finding them so try not give up and keep your head held high as your so much more lovely than you think and you always have been and even though it's difficult right now try to remember you don't have to go through this alone and if you might like you could always pm me if you might want to talk about it a little I hope this helps c:

i feel stressed and depressed at the moment, unsure why, it's almost 1 AM and i can't get to sleep due to stress

I'm sorry that your feeling this way as I understand it can be difficult however try not to think into it too much as I find this can often lead the over thinking situation's which can often make you feel worse instead try to listen to some calm relaxing music as this often helps keep your mind calm and perhaps even keep negative thoughts away as well as this maybe read a book as well as sometimes depression can be the result of boredom leading to your mind thinking about things which can make you feel a little bit down as well as this if your finding it hard to sleep regularly maybe try some specialised sleeping teas as there is a variety that can help you get a good night sleep or calm down easier such as camomile tea I hope this helps a little and again if you might like to talk yoh can always pm me I hope things improve for you c:

I'm alone.
There is no reason for me to be anywhere anymore. I need to disappear.

Firstly there is always reasons for you to be around its just the case of seeing them and acknowledging them and I know this can be difficult however there is always people out there who love you and respect you for who you are and despite how bad things might be even if you can see a purpose right now that doesn't mean there won't be any purpose in future as even through bad times the bad times won't last forever and things will get better eventually however only if you don't give up and keep trying I know this is difficult however you don't have to go through this alone and if you might like you could always pm me if you might want to talk about it a little but always remember that even in the worst of times there is still things out there that can make you feel happy sometimes it's the case of finding them or remembering them however try not to give up as your so much better than that and you always have been

[Roadhog]

let me guess. it's just ignore ghostie until they go away day isn't it?
oh freaking well. might as well just go. it's not like anyone truly wants me around.
bye

I do ;0;
you seem really sweet!! Don't go :'(

I feel like I go through so much, I tell people about this but they hardly listen..
My friends have been acting like they're annoyed a lot of me
I don't feel.. the same on different websites like I used to
I don't think anyone really wants to be.. my friend

I'm sorry about that!! If you need a hug just pm me :0

I'm alone.
There is no reason for me to be anywhere anymore. I need to disappear.

I'm sorry!! No, you don't need to disappear- you are perfect u.u

_______________________________

Just a little frustration/rant here if anyone would like to even look.

so last night me, and my family (Ma, Dad,and 2 brothers) went to the mall. Supposed to be a great night- first day of break, all was going to be great. Now I need to kinda address my health problems in the past. I passed out in a grocery store once, and BAD anxiety.so we get to the mall, and going into the phone store- since my one brother's gift is going to be a new samsung. So I sit down and realize I took 2 of my once daily anxiety meds. I freak out, but I didn't really need to- since my mom called her friend that is a doctor, and it worked out. Point of that is, is that I got all nervous, and shaky. So we go into gamestop for my other brother's present- I sit down and freak out some more. This time I feel nausious, and dizzy. then we got to the bathroom after gamestop since my Mom needed to use the restroom. She went, and I felt like throwing up. Luckily, I didn't but I ran to the bench to sit down before I felt like passing out. I felt the same feeling when I passed out in the grocery store that one time- and that incident, I wanted to sit down before I passed out. My mom knew I might just be hungry/needing to eat, so we got pretzel bites. It worked out in the end, but I just feel so sick, frustrated and worn out. Like I feel SO bad we didn't get much shopping done. ;0

[trees |-/]

Im just really upset... I need an internet hug

[fish sticks]

my parents just don't respect that the only meats I eat are bacon, hot dogs (and only 1 specific type) and sometimes chicken fingers... and they're forcing me to have ham...

I know this is kind of silly but I'm scared. I don't like trying new foods.

I understand where you're coming from. I hate trying things I'm not accustomed to. I normally just eat pasta everyday which is why I am surprisingly weak and suspectable to illnesses. Sorry you have to go through eating something you probably won't enjoy, but who knows. I don't really enjoy ham myself. *hugs*

Im just really upset... I need an internet hug

*hugs* If you need to talk about anything my PM box is always open.

[arabella !!]

Im just really upset... I need an internet hug

-Hugs tight-. PM me if you want to chat! <3

[kiwikweenie]

realllly want to finish this drawing but oakei or however you spell it is not working for me ughhHGH

I've tried and it won't load at all s c re a m s

[Lincoln]

How dare she cheat?

[miss believer]

If anyone needs advice, or just to rant, my inbox is always open. Feel free to shoot me a PM c: