CS Debate Thread

[The Great ME!]

I had to deal with that today. I hate the words "you'll change your mind" so much.

My mother feeds me that line all the time and I'm not even female. Actually that might be even worse because she'll say stuff like, "You don't even have to give birth to them yourself, so why are you even complaining about it?" as if that makes it any more convincing.

Our parents grew up in an age when having children and raising a family was still considered "the norm"

Well I've personally also noticed a trend of older generation parents seeming to have some ludicrous idea in their head that it's almost their birthright to disrespect or even be bullies towards their own children with behaviors they'd never put up with themselves as "the norm" from their generation, even when the kids aren't disrespectful themselves, or at least not enough to warrant the level of backlash they get for it, but that doesn't make it more acceptable.
I'm not saying ALL parents of course, but I have seen a drastically higher amount of them, most of which think they're the perfect role model of what parenting should be. And I don't mean that I expect them to be perfect, of course, as no one is, but I've seen and heard some really extreme stuff that the older generation of society(like mid/late 30's through 40's) actually seems to condone even though there are literally thousands of studies to prove what they're doing is harmful.
But it wasn't considered "harmful" in their generation so it must not be so!

EVENTUALLY they'll realize you're serious about not having children

I don't know about that. Mine is still raving about things I did that "wronged" her when I was four years old, as if that has anything to do with what I'm doing right or wrong now when that was over fifteen years ago.

[Tea_Leaf]

(Okay, so I'm going to post my opinion about some recent events over here.
This is connecting to my last rant on the Things That Annoy You thread, but I'd like to see what other people think about this problem.)

Perhaps that "chitter chatter" amuses us?

Perhaps we enjoy talking to one another and find the replies amusing?

Perhaps we could move it to PM, but we can't because we'd run out of room after a few days?

Besides, how can we go off topic?
The topic is a topic about something that amuses you.
That's what we're discussing, right?

How can someone expect another person to see something amusing, and not discuss it?
You can't just look at something that you find amusing, or you're really interested in, and then think: "Oh, that's cool, now let me ignore it."

And also, not everyone is willing to just delete a message. I mean, what if one of those messages is from a friend of yours? What if you had a conversation that makes you smile when you look at it? What if some people, for whatever reason, just don't want to delete the messages? Besides, it'll take up too much time and energy, which a lot of people don't have.
Additionally, these conversations take up a lot of space really quickly.

~~~

Now, I'm just simply expressing my own opinion. If I've offended anyone, I apologize.

I'm not sure if this will seriously offend anyone, since I can't read their mind, and I can't possibly know how they'd take this message.

[CroissantMoon]

alright, ive been feeling the need to ask some people about this. it may be inapporiate but i need help because i dont want to seem heartless and would love other people's opinions. it sorta goes with the children thing so its not THAT offtopic. i have a friend and she is younger than me (in her teens still around 17-18) and she has a boyfriend. now, she had a sort of miscarriage and gave birth to a stillborn child. (f this gets a little weird ill delete it just say the word!) and i feel really bad but i had to delete her off my friends list because she began posting pictures of her..child who had passed away all over her facebook. now im not saying she cant grieve but it broke my heart to see a dead child on my screen. but this isnt all. I saw her boyfriend once clinging to another girl so im going to say he isnt the most loyal person, but that isnt up to me. However, its been a few months and she is now carrying his second child. and i truly feel scared for her. she is much younger than me and i KNOW this shouldnt be my business but i want to know. am i a bad person for thinking that pictures of your child that has passed on, a little ..i dont know, private?..should i tell her what i saw her boyfriend do? im just so scared for her...sorry if this is bad im driving myself nuts over here, so IF THIS IS INAPPROPRIATE PLEASE PM ME i dont want anyone to feel weird or anything sorry!

[ArcticGold]

alright, ive been feeling the need to ask some people about this. it may be inapporiate but i need help because i dont want to seem heartless and would love other people's opinions. it sorta goes with the children thing so its not THAT offtopic. i have a friend and she is younger than me (in her teens still around 17-18) and she has a boyfriend. now, she had a sort of miscarriage and gave birth to a stillborn child. (f this gets a little weird ill delete it just say the word!) and i feel really bad but i had to delete her off my friends list because she began posting pictures of her..child who had passed away all over her facebook. now im not saying she cant grieve but it broke my heart to see a dead child on my screen. but this isnt all. I saw her boyfriend once clinging to another girl so im going to say he isnt the most loyal person, but that isnt up to me. However, its been a few months and she is now carrying his second child. and i truly feel scared for her. she is much younger than me and i KNOW this shouldnt be my business but i want to know. am i a bad person for thinking that pictures of your child that has passed on, a little ..i dont know, private?..should i tell her what i saw her boyfriend do? im just so scared for her...sorry if this is bad im driving myself nuts over here, so IF THIS IS INAPPROPRIATE PLEASE PM ME i dont want anyone to feel weird or anything sorry!

Hmm I believe you should tell her what her boyfriend did, it may be heartbreaking for her but it's better for her know. And I agree with you on the part of the pictures of her child, she should keep them private, well it's very strange to see that on Facebook

[qiripan]

alright, ive been feeling the need to ask some people about this. it may be inapporiate but i need help because i dont want to seem heartless and would love other people's opinions. it sorta goes with the children thing so its not THAT offtopic. i have a friend and she is younger than me (in her teens still around 17-18) and she has a boyfriend. now, she had a sort of miscarriage and gave birth to a stillborn child. (f this gets a little weird ill delete it just say the word!) and i feel really bad but i had to delete her off my friends list because she began posting pictures of her..child who had passed away all over her facebook. now im not saying she cant grieve but it broke my heart to see a dead child on my screen. but this isnt all. I saw her boyfriend once clinging to another girl so im going to say he isnt the most loyal person, but that isnt up to me. However, its been a few months and she is now carrying his second child. and i truly feel scared for her. she is much younger than me and i KNOW this shouldnt be my business but i want to know. am i a bad person for thinking that pictures of your child that has passed on, a little ..i dont know, private?..should i tell her what i saw her boyfriend do? im just so scared for her...sorry if this is bad im driving myself nuts over here, so IF THIS IS INAPPROPRIATE PLEASE PM ME i dont want anyone to feel weird or anything sorry!

Hmm I believe you should tell her what her boyfriend did, it may be heartbreaking for her but it's better for her know. And I agree with you on the part of the pictures of her child, she should keep them private, well it's very strange to see that on Facebook

I agree. I mean, if I were to give birth to a stillborn, I would take a picture of him/her, photoshop it to say something along the lines of "R.I.P., [insert name here], You will be missed." Then just not post any other pictures of him/her. It's kind of sickening and depressing to see multiple pictures of a stillborn child. I don't know if Facebook has a "followers" system or not, so I will just assume it does. Think of your followers. Let's say my cat gave birth to a litter of four kittens. Two died because of weakness. I would post a picture saying; "RIP Pumpkin and Muffin, have a good time up there" or something like that. I would grieve, of course, and post a picture of the healthy kittens, because well, who in the right mind would want to see posts of dead kittens? I would grieve for a few months/weeks, then be happy{ish} because at least two kittens survived. About the thing with the boyfriend, I would tell her. I wouldn't want a boyfriend who cheats.

It seems like your "friend" here is too over-obsessed about her stillborn child. I would get over it after a month. How long has it been since this child died, may I ask?

[CroissantMoon]

Hmm I believe you should tell her what her boyfriend did, it may be heartbreaking for her but it's better for her know. And I agree with you on the part of the pictures of her child, she should keep them private, well it's very strange to see that on Facebook [/quote]

I agree. I mean, if I were to give birth to a stillborn, I would take a picture of him/her, photoshop it to say something along the lines of "R.I.P., [insert name here], You will be missed." Then just not post any other pictures of him/her. It's kind of sickening and depressing to see multiple pictures of a stillborn child. I don't know if Facebook has a "followers" system or not, so I will just assume it does. Think of your followers. Let's say my cat gave birth to a litter of four kittens. Two died because of weakness. I would post a picture saying; "RIP Pumpkin and Muffin, have a good time up there" or something like that. I would grieve, of course, and post a picture of the healthy kittens, because well, who in the right mind would want to see posts of dead kittens? I would grieve for a few months/weeks, then be happy{ish} because at least two kittens survived. About the thing with the boyfriend, I would tell her. I wouldn't want a boyfriend who cheats.

It seems like your "friend" here is too over-obsessed about her stillborn child. I would get over it after a month. How long has it been since this child died, may I ask?

[/quote]
it wasnt that long at all, maybe a few months ago, and now she's having another one with the cheater and im like..so sad right now. and thankyou for the responses i just didnt know what to do or who to ask and felt like a terrible person for unfriending her because of course she has a right to grieve but i dont think she even understands what she was doing because that stuff, well for me anyway, is very private. death is not something you should be posting on websites such as facebook and stuff.. i would understand one or two, but it was a LOT and it made my heart clench. thankyou everyone..

[qiripan]

Hmm. Well, you did the right thing to unfriend her. I would just ask if she can come over to your house/ vice versa, and aay you'd like to talk about her boyfriend and those pictures. Don't loose your temper/get upset when she disagrees with you. And if she thinks you're lying, just get up and leave. And if she starts yelling at you, also leave. And probably not talk to her anymore. It's her fault she won't listen. Hope I helped and good luck ❤️❤️

[Shandelion.]

(Okay, so I'm going to post my opinion about some recent events over here.
This is connecting to my last rant on the Things That Annoy You thread, but I'd like to see what other people think about this problem.)

Perhaps that "chitter chatter" amuses us?

Perhaps we enjoy talking to one another and find the replies amusing?

Perhaps we could move it to PM, but we can't because we'd run out of room after a few days?

Besides, how can we go off topic?
The topic is a topic about something that amuses you.
That's what we're discussing, right?

How can someone expect another person to see something amusing, and not discuss it?
You can't just look at something that you find amusing, or you're really interested in, and then think: "Oh, that's cool, now let me ignore it."

And also, not everyone is willing to just delete a message. I mean, what if one of those messages is from a friend of yours? What if you had a conversation that makes you smile when you look at it? What if some people, for whatever reason, just don't want to delete the messages? Besides, it'll take up too much time and energy, which a lot of people don't have.
Additionally, these conversations take up a lot of space really quickly.

~~~

Now, I'm just simply expressing my own opinion. If I've offended anyone, I apologize.

I'm not sure if this will seriously offend anyone, since I can't read their mind, and I can't possibly know how they'd take this message.

Yes, I understand that we did get several warnings, but really? That justification... it is locked for being off topic.
With no specified topic, I don't see how anything can be off topic.
We didn't even treat it like a chat thread. Our chat thread on Xat, that is a chat thread, the TTAmY Thread? We were just posting things that amused us, and those posts did amuse us.
We did post about fandoms etc. but that doesn't mean it's spam. Most of the stuff we posted on that thread fit a topic that is somewhere on Chicken Smoothie.

We can't just PM each other, that's ridiculous.

Now, the thread is gone and this sounds really stupid and cheesy, but it really meant a lot to most of us.
A lot of us became friends, which is part of the point of CS, meeting new people and having fun. We laughed and our days became happier. I'm going through some really tough things and having loads of trouble, but this thread helped me and many others. Now, we frequent the Things That Annoy you thread, which isn't as pleasant. We have a more negative outlook.

I am also fed up with the people who are saying they are mad at the spammers... what spammers? We didn't spam and that's really unfair. Everything that is going on makes me feel guilty and bad and I really miss the thread.

[CroissantMoon]

(Okay, so I'm going to post my opinion about some recent events over here.
This is connecting to my last rant on the Things That Annoy You thread, but I'd like to see what other people think about this problem.)

Perhaps that "chitter chatter" amuses us?

Perhaps we enjoy talking to one another and find the replies amusing?

Perhaps we could move it to PM, but we can't because we'd run out of room after a few days?

Besides, how can we go off topic?
The topic is a topic about something that amuses you.
That's what we're discussing, right?

How can someone expect another person to see something amusing, and not discuss it?
You can't just look at something that you find amusing, or you're really interested in, and then think: "Oh, that's cool, now let me ignore it."

And also, not everyone is willing to just delete a message. I mean, what if one of those messages is from a friend of yours? What if you had a conversation that makes you smile when you look at it? What if some people, for whatever reason, just don't want to delete the messages? Besides, it'll take up too much time and energy, which a lot of people don't have.
Additionally, these conversations take up a lot of space really quickly.

~~~

Now, I'm just simply expressing my own opinion. If I've offended anyone, I apologize.

I'm not sure if this will seriously offend anyone, since I can't read their mind, and I can't possibly know how they'd take this message.

Yes, I understand that we did get several warnings, but really? That justification... it is locked for being off topic.
With no specified topic, I don't see how anything can be off topic.
We didn't even treat it like a chat thread. Our chat thread on Xat, that is a chat thread, the TTAmY Thread? We were just posting things that amused us, and those posts did amuse us.
We did post about fandoms etc. but that doesn't mean it's spam. Most of the stuff we posted on that thread fit a topic that is somewhere on Chicken Smoothie.

We can't just PM each other, that's ridiculous.

Now, the thread is gone and this sounds really stupid and cheesy, but it really meant a lot to most of us.
A lot of us became friends, which is part of the point of CS, meeting new people and having fun. We laughed and our days became happier. I'm going through some really tough things and having loads of trouble, but this thread helped me and many others. Now, we frequent the Things That Annoy you thread, which isn't as pleasant. We have a more negative outlook.

I am also fed up with the people who are saying they are mad at the spammers... what spammers? We didn't spam and that's really unfair. Everything that is going on makes me feel guilty and bad and I really miss the thread.

that sounds like areally terrible excuse to lock a thread, maybe you guys should make a new one for just the few of you who just want to talk about nothing! that could be fun and then they cant lock it or call it spam because it wont be off-topic anymore! name it something like, i dont know "chat for fun" or "the random corner" or something silly but with meaning to the mods that it will just be for randomness,! because you're right, cs IS a place to make friends and have fun, if its cramping and non pleasant than its not the aim of this site~

[Shandelion.]

(Okay, so I'm going to post my opinion about some recent events over here.
This is connecting to my last rant on the Things That Annoy You thread, but I'd like to see what other people think about this problem.)

Perhaps that "chitter chatter" amuses us?

Perhaps we enjoy talking to one another and find the replies amusing?

Perhaps we could move it to PM, but we can't because we'd run out of room after a few days?

Besides, how can we go off topic?
The topic is a topic about something that amuses you.
That's what we're discussing, right?

How can someone expect another person to see something amusing, and not discuss it?
You can't just look at something that you find amusing, or you're really interested in, and then think: "Oh, that's cool, now let me ignore it."

And also, not everyone is willing to just delete a message. I mean, what if one of those messages is from a friend of yours? What if you had a conversation that makes you smile when you look at it? What if some people, for whatever reason, just don't want to delete the messages? Besides, it'll take up too much time and energy, which a lot of people don't have.
Additionally, these conversations take up a lot of space really quickly.

~~~

Now, I'm just simply expressing my own opinion. If I've offended anyone, I apologize.

I'm not sure if this will seriously offend anyone, since I can't read their mind, and I can't possibly know how they'd take this message.

Yes, I understand that we did get several warnings, but really? That justification... it is locked for being off topic.
With no specified topic, I don't see how anything can be off topic.
We didn't even treat it like a chat thread. Our chat thread on Xat, that is a chat thread, the TTAmY Thread? We were just posting things that amused us, and those posts did amuse us.
We did post about fandoms etc. but that doesn't mean it's spam. Most of the stuff we posted on that thread fit a topic that is somewhere on Chicken Smoothie.

We can't just PM each other, that's ridiculous.

Now, the thread is gone and this sounds really stupid and cheesy, but it really meant a lot to most of us.
A lot of us became friends, which is part of the point of CS, meeting new people and having fun. We laughed and our days became happier. I'm going through some really tough things and having loads of trouble, but this thread helped me and many others. Now, we frequent the Things That Annoy you thread, which isn't as pleasant. We have a more negative outlook.

I am also fed up with the people who are saying they are mad at the spammers... what spammers? We didn't spam and that's really unfair. Everything that is going on makes me feel guilty and bad and I really miss the thread.

that sounds like areally terrible excuse to lock a thread, maybe you guys should make a new one for just the few of you who just want to talk about nothing! that could be fun and then they cant lock it or call it spam because it wont be off-topic anymore! name it something like, i dont know "chat for fun" or "the random corner" or something silly but with meaning to the mods that it will just be for randomness,! because you're right, cs IS a place to make friends and have fun, if its cramping and non pleasant than its not the aim of this site~

Honestly, we would love to do that, but we probably wouldn't be allowed. We can't have chat threads on CS, so that would definitely be locked. Things That Amuse You never did have a real topic, but making a chat thread probably wouldn't be tolerated.