Crushes, Boyfriends, and Girlfriends | V4

[greysilence]

Previous post.

This is gonna be long.

Last night my friend, Savanna, asked me to go to the fair with her, so I went with her. It's a really big fair that most people from my school go to. I texted Jeremy after about an hour or so and asked if he was there, and he was. We were watching the bus races, and he ended up sitting on the other side. We were gonna ride rides together after the last race was done, but Savanna and I had to follow her step-mom around, so we couldn't really.

We were walking along, and I spotted him, so I ran at him and like shoved him in the chest. Well, he didn't see me coming and ended up punching me in the stomach. -.- Once he realized it was me, he felt really bad and kept apologizing and stuff. I was just like, "I don't really care, it's all good." lol I said I had to get back to her step-mom, so he asked for a hug and I gave him one. It was a pretty good hug. haha

So we were texting later, and he just kept saying yeah.

Me: What's wrong?
Him: I miss you.
Me: I miss you too. :(
Him: :(
Me: This sucks. :/
Him: What?
Me: I don't know, it's hard to explain.
Him: I got time.
*skips past this and me trying to squeeze the incoming information out of him*
Me: So explain.
Him: I like you, if it's not obvious, but I want to stay friends. And Corday told me to date you, but our friendship is really important to me. And you looked really, really cute tonight, and it was like guhhhh, why.
Me: Awww. Well, thanks. :p And yeah, I can see where that's conflicting. (brilliant answer, I know)
Him: Yeah.
Me: Sorry, I just don't know how to respond. It kinda took me off guard, and I'm awkward and stuff. >.<
Him: Yeah.
Me: Asdfghjkl. Yeah, that kinda had to do with my side of why things are *beep* up. aha
Him: So what's yours?
Me: It kinda hurt when you asked Ashley out cuz it was like, okay, we're gonna be cool, but I'm gonna get a girlfriend even though I like you, and then we're not gonna talk a lot. And like, I didn't wanna be a *beep*, so I just kinda backed off. And I just never wanted to come off as clingy or a *beep* that I felt like I was losing you when you guys started dating. And I don't know what I wanna do. A bunch of people keep telling me to date you, but I just don't know. I don't wanna lose our friendship if we ever date and have a bad break up. Like, I've never even had a boyfriend, and you'd probably just get frustrated. (he wouldn't get frustrated, I just threw that in there because I wasn't sure if he knew that or not) And I'm not gonna tell you to break up with Ashley cuz then I'd be a pretty *beep* friend. I just dunno. My brain's a jumbled mess.
Him: Oh.
Me: Yeah...
Him: I don't know.
Me: I don't know either.
Him: Okay, well sorry, but on that note I'm falling asleep. So night [insert my dad's name/one of my nickname].
Me: Goodnight.

The only thing holding us back is not wanting to lose our friendship....And as you can clearly see from how we ended it, I'm awkward and we don't even know what we're gonna do. I don't know if I really need advice or anything, I just had to spill. Xp

[mitchypoosays]

Okay, so hi guys... So, anyway... last week my crush asked me to be his girlfriend. So I said yes. But we're not talking, at all. Like, sometimes we say hi or goodbye. But we never have a full conversation or even text/message each other. I've asked all of my closest friends what to do, but they give me answers like, "say hi and smile." Psshh, as if I don't do that. Anyway, this is my first relationship and I don't want it to fail this fast. Help?

[Kecko]

Okay, so hi guys... So, anyway... last week my crush asked me to be his girlfriend. So I said yes. But we're not talking, at all. Like, sometimes we say hi or goodbye. But we never have a full conversation or even text/message each other. I've asked all of my closest friends what to do, but they give me answers like, "say hi and smile." Psshh, as if I don't do that. Anyway, this is my first relationship and I don't want it to fail this fast. Help?

Are you waiting for him to message you? If so, you message him first, one of my best buddies said that he liked it when his girlfriend messaged him first sometimes not always having him start the convo. Sorry it's not much but that's what he said

[kelly.]

Okay, so hi guys... So, anyway... last week my crush asked me to be his girlfriend. So I said yes. But we're not talking, at all. Like, sometimes we say hi or goodbye. But we never have a full conversation or even text/message each other. I've asked all of my closest friends what to do, but they give me answers like, "say hi and smile." Psshh, as if I don't do that. Anyway, this is my first relationship and I don't want it to fail this fast. Help?

Are you waiting for him to message you? If so, you message him first, one of my best buddies said that he liked it when his girlfriend messaged him first sometimes not always having him start the convo. Sorry it's not much but that's what he said

i agree with kecko, try texting him first c; you'll most likely get a reply and then have a nice conversation. or try sitting next to him somewhere. like at lunch, ask if he could sit with you or if you can sit with him. I see a lot of relationships where the two don't even talk and it's really awkward :>

[Amazonboy]

Warning before I get started, this is going to be fairly lengthy despite the fact that I'm going to try and tell it as bare bones as possible. Please bear with me.
First off lets start off with identifications C will stand for my crush B will stand for boyfriend 1 J will stand for boyfriend 2 now let's get started:

I first met C in 2010, the first year I had done the school production at my school, she was helping out her sister who was playing the lead that year. When I first met her our conversation was short and simple, after the production we went our separate ways. Next year I came to school for the 2010-2011 school year, I found out that she enrolled that year. Didn't talk to her at all though, because I didn't see her, completely different scheduling. I thought I'd join the play again this year despite the fact that it was now going to be a musical and I couldn't sing. I joined anyway. That's when I really met her. She was cool, pretty, talented, and had such an awesome personality and warm smile. I didn't really fall for her yet though because she already had a boyfriend B, who I was friends with. C and I became friends and we parted ways till next year, the 2011-2012 school year. This year I finally had a class with her this year. Now I could talk to her more often. The one class I had with her was Latin III and the teacher was really lenient and cool. C and I's mutual love for all thing nerdy especially Doctor Who, and our mutual interest in the arts, mock trial, and especially theater made our friendship blossom, later we also both joined Crew together. At this time she was dating J who I have recently become good friends with as we are both big fans of photography. He was also in the play. Anyway this when my crush really started to grow. I really like her now, and since her relationship with J was really light and not serious I asked her to prom that year. She turned me down as she was already going with J. I went to prom anyway, and I am glad I did. I went and I danced with my friends, including her. Later in the night though we slow danced. My heart was renewed from the disappointment I had felt from her previous rejection. Fueled by this my crush grew. Later her birthday came up, I got her a Sound of Music Poster, and her Dad later told me as he and I are friends too, that C had said that the poster was her favorite birthday gift ever. I was so excited with this. We parted from each other for another summer, which I was somehow ok with. Until we cam to this school year, that's when things really start to happen.

So the 2012-2013 School Year. Still only had one class with her which was Latin IV. We still had the same interests except this year we were both in Student Council. I guess you could say that the first half of this school year went pretty similarly to the year prior. Still a grand friendship, but nothing really more. We were in the school production (which this year really pushed my boundaries as I had to take my pants off in front of the whole school including her, but that is beside the point. After that my love for her really grew, and I started to feel the sting of it. I really fell for her. I wanted her to know how I felt for her and how she had helped me, so that valentine's day I had a flower gram delivered to her inscribed: To brighten your day, since you always brighten mine. She loved it, which made me both feel embarrassed and happy. I really wanted to ask her to prom again this year, I was thinking about giving her a wooden cutout that says "Will you got to prom with me?" in circular Gallifreyan at the beginning of the day, and then telling her what it says at the end of the school day. My parents told me that was a stupid idea and to just be straightforward. I took their advice. Our school has a thing called international day, where we celebrate different cultures, and you can dress up in cultural dress from any culture. The year prior I had worn a kilt, and remembering how C had said I was so brave and cool to wear it, I wore it again this year. This was the day she finally said yes. Her class had to clean our dining hall after lunch that day before going to the main event, which was in the gymnasium. I not being in the same class with her, waited outside the gymnasium for her to come over hopefully by herself. This is when I start freaking out a little. I am kind of an introverted and shy guy, so I get severely nervous with these things. I stood my ground though and sure enough she came over alone, and I asked her to Prom. She replied "Yeah, of course!", and me not knowing what to do with all the joy pent up inside me I just high fived her and said "great". She ran off and told her friends while sat down very fairly excited. The next couple of week my mind was always set on Prom. C was the president of the prom committee and the theme was "the Golden Age of Hollywood", so obviously she was going to do something from that era, and have done up the whole place for Prom so I needed to compliment that hard work. I rented myself a tuxedo from that era, borrowed one of the school vans, made a giant top hat and bowtie for the van, and grabbed some of my grandfather's cds for the night. I also got this beautiful corsage for C of mini roses in red and white, which my grandfather made since he's a florist. The night was spectacular. Without a doubt the best night of my life. We had so much fun together, and the DJ had played some of the best songs as per my friend and I's requests. Including but not limited to: Bohemian Rhapsody, All the Twist variations, Stayin' Alive, and a song that for the most part only C and I knew and enjoyed Dragostea Din Tea. We had such a great night which ended with a hug. Later that month I had remembered I was going to Philly Wizard Con, and her and I being big fans of all thing s nerdy I decided to ask her out to thee con. She said no as he had already had plans to spend time with her grandparents and other family that weekend, to my disappointment. I was cool with it though, I still had fun at the con. We finished oof the school year still great friends, and for her birthday this year I got her TARDIS socks (as we share a love for Doctor Who and Weird Socks)and this really cute heart key with wings necklace which I though she'd like. I gave it to her in a mason jar I had painted (as she loves mason jars). She really loved the gift. We finished up the school years and parted ways once again, but this time intead of being cool with it I felt such pangs of lovesickness. I couldn't stop thinking about her. The only things I had to really soothe to soothe this were her infrequent Facebook messages, and sometimes reading what she had wrote in my yearbook. In the yearbook message was included that I was the best prom date anyone could have, that I outshone David Tennant in the play, and how I was sweet. This wasn't good enough for me so I handwrote her letter with quill and ink onto paper I had made look old with the use of coffee and an oven. This letter was very basic, but asked her some questions, and said how I read the book she suggested and what I had though of it, etc.. Afterwards I went on a fantastic trip to Iceland with my school's engineering club. The trip was fantastic and Iceland is the most beautiful place ever, but in this beauty I still couldn't help but think about C, all the time. I got home no letter back. She later sent me a Facebook message that she had sent a letter, never came. So starting to get a little desperate I got a texting app on my iPod (since I don't have a phone, because I feel I don't need one). She tells me she hasn't sent it and she's sorry and that I must hate her now. I tell her that no I don't hate you it's fine you didn't send the letter yet. It's all good. I texted her for a couple days and then she just stopped texting me. I replied back once about it, cleverly disguised as a question on whether she's seen the new Sherlock teaser or not. Nothing, and that is where I am at today.

I would like some advice on what to do on one or more of the following
-What I should do now
-What I should do once school starts
-What should I do at any point in the future

Please, C is the light of my life. I have never felt this way about anyone, and the feelings are so strong. She pulled me out of a hard, dark harsh time into the light of day. She means the world to me. I would do anything for her. Please help. Thank you for reading through all that.

[lunacookies]

Okay, so I've never had a boyfriend (cuz i'm not aloud to date until like half a year from now), but I've liked this guy for pretty much the last two years. We have this weird relationship because we're actually pretty similar (both weirdos haha) except sometimes he acts like im not there when we're around certain people. When we're by ourselves or with a few of my friends, i really like how he acts. We joke around a lot and we're both fairly smart, so we usually just talk or make perverted jokes and stuff (cuz thats just who we are ha). But anyway, when I'm around most of his friends, I feel awkward because either A) They're popular and I'm not, or B)I used to be friends with some of them and we had a falling out. Plus when we're around his friends, he pretty much ignores me...which bothers me, but not a ton. Normally we text a lot, but when summer started, that slowed down and we don't really interact out of school a lot, so i haven't seen him in a while. He plays football and im in marching band, so we usually see eachother during summer practices, but this year i had to have back surgery so I couldn't do band. What made me feel better is an hour after my surgery, he texted me and asked how i was doing which i replied to but after that he didnt text me back. And since then i've snapchatted him and texted him, just asking him questions about homework and stuff, but he hasn't replied to any. and hes still talking to my best friend and all our other friends, so i think hes probably ignoring me. Even worse, we dont have any classes together next year, so theres like absolutely no way we can talk unless i just come straight out and ask him i hes ignoring me. Which I'm too much of a wimp to do. Sooooooo wieurbguhebrughbweyrbguew
Now my head hurts.

[amethyst,]

I'm looking for a bit of advice here, as I'm torn.
Buggy = my boyfriend of two years.

I broke up with him last night. Or, we are on "break", so it's not an actual breakup. Lately, we haven't talked much or seen each other much, and I haven't really felt anything for him. It's like I tolerate him, but that's it. So last night, we were both going to a mutual friend's party. I was hoping I would get there, see Buggy, and maybe feel something for him. Normally when I haven't seen him in a while, I get all warm and fuzzy inside when I see him again. But I saw him last night, and I felt nothing. Absolutely nothing. He might as well have been his friend, that's how little I felt.
So I didn't really talk to him for most of the party, because of that and when he did talk to me he just shoved me around. Early this morning, at like 1, he texted me angry and upset. That's when I told him I wanted to go on break. He didn't realize how serious I was until he called me around 11 today. He was mad because it was out of the blue and it's all anyone wants to talk about. He said there wasn't a real reason that I was giving him, besides that "I need time to think about things." And I do need time to think about the relationship. I'm not sure if I should suck it up and try again, or just leave for good.
I'm still pretty numb right now, I kind of miss him, but not very much.
Any thoughts or advice?

Also, so you know, this is not some fling. We've dated for two years and both have put a lot into the relationship. That's why I am so hesitant to end things.

dear -firesong-,
gah, i haven't had this happen to me before, but i feel for you girl. anyway, this is a really difficult situation. one of the best things you could do is talk to him. like an actual deep conversation, where you guys are mature and can figure things out. and sometimes breaks aren't a bad thing. you might get back together after it. also, in this case, it might be a good idea to just wait things out, and see what your heart tells you. that sound stupid, but you should take a little time to figure out your feelings. hope this helped. message me anytime.

xoxo,
ephemera,

[Lana1171]

Can someone pm me? I just have a problem and my friend stalks all my post =_= really appreciated!

[oodles]

so i have my boyfriend mitchell, and my best friends katelyne.
i love them both so much c: so one day katelyne and i hung out with mitchell
at our high school. i could tell it was a little awkward for katelyne it beign her first time
meeting him and all, so she was onher ipod for the most part. i didn't think much of
it, so i just started talking to her to make her feel included. just about like old memories
and such. so her mom texted and said that she's on her way to pick us up.
mitchell walked us to the front of the school; i hugged him goodbye.
when we got back to her house, i asked her if she had fun. she said she did, but i'm
not so sure. she wasn't giving me eye contact like she normally does, and she just
sounded angered at the thought. and i asked mitchell what he'd thought of her
and he said she was pretty fun and he wants to hang out with us again.
but about a few weeks after we'd hung out, she posted a journal on deviantart which i think
was about me. she said "I'm so close to losing my best, best, BESSSST friend over a guy."
and "She just jumped into a relationship." and "Don't lie to me and say I'm not going
to be ignored when we hang out." and just things like that. and here's something
quoted from her little rant: "So whatever, I've found someone else who isn't a "use-@$$ and she actually enjoys
having me around, because by far, I am the only person she has to talk too."
i'm just sitting here like, what? what's your deal? you're not being left out, i'm
not ignoring you, i go to your house almost everyday, we've been best friends
since 4th grade, and that was what? 5 years ago? so, you would give up
on our friendship just like that? for heavens sake, you dated theis guy in your
apartments that made fun of me all the time and you did nothing. did i tell him off? no.
did i stop talking to you? no. we're humans. we're going to fall in love with people.
you have so many times and i went throught with it. so when i finally got a boyfriend,
you got defensive about everything. i don't know what to think anymore.
please, i need help.

[thunderofthedrum]

so i have my boyfriend mitchell, and my best friends katelyne.
i love them both so much c: so one day katelyne and i hung out with mitchell
at our high school. i could tell it was a little awkward for katelyne it beign her first time
meeting him and all, so she was onher ipod for the most part. i didn't think much of
it, so i just started talking to her to make her feel included. just about like old memories
and such. so her mom texted and said that she's on her way to pick us up.
mitchell walked us to the front of the school; i hugged him goodbye.
when we got back to her house, i asked her if she had fun. she said she did, but i'm
not so sure. she wasn't giving me eye contact like she normally does, and she just
sounded angered at the thought. and i asked mitchell what he'd thought of her
and he said she was pretty fun and he wants to hang out with us again.
but about a few weeks after we'd hung out, she posted a journal on deviantart which i think
was about me. she said "I'm so close to losing my best, best, BESSSST friend over a guy."
and "She just jumped into a relationship." and "Don't lie to me and say I'm not going
to be ignored when we hang out." and just things like that. and here's something
quoted from her little rant: "So whatever, I've found someone else who isn't a "use-@$$ and she actually enjoys
having me around, because by far, I am the only person she has to talk too."
i'm just sitting here like, what? what's your deal? you're not being left out, i'm
not ignoring you, i go to your house almost everyday, we've been best friends
since 4th grade, and that was what? 5 years ago? so, you would give up
on our friendship just like that? for heavens sake, you dated theis guy in your
apartments that made fun of me all the time and you did nothing. did i tell him off? no.
did i stop talking to you? no. we're humans. we're going to fall in love with people.
you have so many times and i went throught with it. so when i finally got a boyfriend,
you got defensive about everything. i don't know what to think anymore.
please, i need help.

It's possible to have a bit of a cycle to happen - you feel awkward so you get on your phone or iPod, then your companions assume you are simply not interested in the current convo or that you're busy or happy with what you're doing, so they continue to chat instead of bringing you back into the conversation. Then you feel even more weird and start to feel downright ignored, like they don't even notice that you're not having fun and don't feel included, that you are using the iPod/phone so that you won't be there sitting awkwardly doing NOTHING, while your companions don't realize this because they figured you could jump back in on your own rather than needing someone to help you back in.

Also, people handle situations differently. Some people are more vocal about their feelings and some are more possessive, or perhaps worried that the good things will end. This is the impression I get from your friend - that she is worried and also bitter.

If it were me, I'd get her to come along again and I'd try to focus more on her, even though it might be challenging at the time. If you are talking about a movie, song, etc, make a point to say "Hey Katelyne, what did you think; did you like the movie?" If she hasn't seen it, you could still get her impression from the trailer preview or suggest seeing it together when it's out on DVD or something, rather than just giving up and saying "Oh" and going back to talking with Mitchell. It's very easy to accidentally do or say little things that might make your friend feel ignored or not included.

Other than that, just be consistent with still spending one on one time with her. Hopefully she'll come around and see that little has changed. When I got into a relationship with my boyfriend my mom started assuming whenever I left it was to see him, and that was definitely irritating. At some point I actually asked my friends if I'd been at all neglecting them since I met my boyfriend, and they said they felt they'd still been seeing me the same amount.

Lastly, make sure that when you are with her, you aren't constantly talking about your boyfriend; that can be really frustrating (and downright boring) to your other friends, particularly if they are single or aren't the biggest fans of this new guy.