Write a Letter You Cannot Send (Read the Rules!)

[birdsarentreal]

dear mr. d
you're the worst teacher i've ever had. you think you're funny. you think you're cool. maybe you thought it was funny to write that in my yearbook? i don't know. but it really made me feel really bad. it's so unprofessional of you to do something like that. all year you ignored my problems and held a grudge against me. you made an already difficult year even worse.

dear h,
i keep thinking about that one time you laughed at me in class. it was a while ago, but it stuck in my mind. you might not remember it, but i certainly do. you and b both laughed at me, and it was such a terrible thing to do, i thought you were really nice.

dear m,
i know that sometimes i'm annoying but i don't think you understand what's going through my mind. i know that you think that what you're doing is ok, but you don't get it. when you do that, it just makes me feel so terrible and angry, but i won't tell you. you probably won't get it.

[artemis,]

dear m,

i'm really tired of having to fake being happy around you. i know you want what is best for me
and have supported me in the past, but now i just need you to stop pressuring me to act "normal".
i hate the little jabs i always get around you guys for being less than happy. you always said you
would be there for me when i needed it, and of course i believed you. but you need to realize
that i cannot simply turn off my depression for everyone else to think i'm happy. just because you
have everything to be happy about, doesn't mean i will follow along like a sheep. i hate the fact
you sat me down and told me i needed to sit there and smile to make sure nobody thinks i'm
a moody person whenever you introduce me to other people. i hate the fact that i need to come
across as "cheerful and lively" so people have a good impression of you. i have my own life now,
and whether you like it or not, i am an adult who will make their own choices and dictate my own
behavior. i'm sick and tired of you telling me i will never get a good job or make the correct decisions
because i am less than happy. i'm trying, and you don't need to keep telling me anymore. i can
tell by your expressions.

- artie

[♡♡♡♡]

Dear A,

Im sorry i dont talk to you much anymore,
i probably seem really rude to.
im sorry.

Dear B,

I think youre pretty cool,
we have alot in common.
i hope we can talk more if i wasnt so shy around
people at school.

Dear C,

Please get me a snek

Dear D,

I think youre really funny and kind
and i wish i would man up and talk to you more.
my 'friends' intimidate me and i know they like you.
you probably dont really even know i exsist though,,,

Dear E,

I wish i didn't believe you.
I don't know why you're so rude,
I don't know if it's because of your self-conscious
or if you really believe what you're saying.
I hope that you can realize what you're doing and how it makes others feel.
I don't know why you only do it to me.
I don't know if you don't want me to be friends with ==== and i'm her friend
or something else.
I do hope that whatever it is I hope you get over it.
honestly, I haven't done anything to you,
and you shouldn't make irrelevant people relevant/
I kinda wish you would just stay away from me, but I have to be your friend/

[hongjoongie.]

dear mom and dad,
please stop telling me to communicate with you guys. i know that communication is key, but if you knew what goes through my head, you'd probably hate me.
i just wanna say sorry for everything i've done, and sorry in advance for the things i'll do in the future
sincerely,
your oldest child, if i can even call myself that.

dear carrot,
oh man, another year, isn't it?? aaa im so glad that you're in my ela class, maybe we'd actually be able to talk again. ngl, i still feel really guilty about what happened last year, but im too shy to apologize to you..so here i am.. writing a letter that you'll probably never see.
you seem to be rather nonchalant about the whole situation, but if you didnt care, then you wouldnt be ignoring me. we were friends, and yet i went and screwed it up, as usual.
i've seen you look at me during ela. im not dumb. i spent a year staring at you behind your back (that sounds creepy. im not a stalker,, i swear. i was just a young teen with a crush) bUT stop staring at me. it makes me feel uncomfortable :c if you think im a weirdo, just tell me!! i think im a weirdo too, i won't be offended. we're already skating on thin ice, what's a little more harm gonna do?
this got really metaphorical and self-deprecating real quick, sorry about that lol. my point is, i wanna talk about this. i wanna fix the mistake i made. but im too anxious to.
sorry.
sorry for being such an idiot.
i want us to be friends again.
best regards,
the person who literally screwed up whatever relationship we had.
ps. you're a really great guy. i don't know why you were so nice to me in the first place.

[Fwutter]

Dear M,

Yes I am beyond mad at you, I'm extremely pissed off by what you did. I am also so upset I can't even do anything or eat, I just want to sit and pout. I got what I wanted and you don't even support me for it. I don't understand how me finally achieving a life long goal makes you mad, I would actually be happy if you got what you were going for, believe it or not. But this isn't the only time you've done this to me, this is just where you went way to far, to the point where I had to give it back and delete. But hey, you are still my bestfriend! I love you as much as I did before all this happened ♥. Fights happen, some happen to other bestfriends larger than this one, but they still hang in there. Yes I am beyond pissed at you, but I'm not going to break our friendship over it, not ever, this is not something to break our friendship over, like I said, my biggest fear is our friendship fading, I do not want to be the one that breaks our friendship. In conclusion, hang in there buddy, I'm mad, but I still love you a lot and our friendship is as strong as it was before this happened ♥

[regular;]

dear mrs. b & mr. z,
please go easy on me this year ;c

dear j,
i really like you.
praying you like me too..
even though you love her.

dear r,
you consider us.. family? what. i love you.
i don't love you as a friend. in fact, not really sure i love you as a person.
i just love you no matter how hard i try not to. no matter what reason i have not to.
i hate you. but i really don't. i just.. hate you so much.

[sunflower,]

dear past me,
wow,,, well, you've changed a lot ever since the last time you've posted on here.
you and c broke up. things got hard.. very hard. but i'm so proud of you for pushing through.
change isn't always bad. sometimes it can be amazing, and necessary. and this was one of those times.
you have so many loving & caring friends. they're the best things you could ever ask for. don't forget that.
good job babe. you're doing amazing. things always end up okay; trust me.
- future you

dear c,
things couldn't work out. i'm so sorry. i can tell you dont want to be friends anymore, and thats okay.
i completely understand. dont feel bad for cutting me out of your life. if it's what makes you happy,
then i'm perfectly fine with it.
- your ex girlfriend/best friend


dear p, g, l, m, & k
you all are the best people i could ever ask for. you make me laugh everyday, and you truly make me happy.
thank you so much. i couldn't ask for anyone better. i love and adore each and every one of you.
- your friend

[LokiToons]

(Gotta lot to say right now, tensions are just boiling over. Yay for this thread...)

Dear... who should I start with? Dear Mom,
Tonight just seemed to crumble down after a fun day at GlowZone, however, it seems that no matter how much fun we all have, we can never escape our problems. Dinner is when it really cracked down, when I mentioned that S wasn't going to be at school tomorrow and that made me happy. I know I'm in the wrong to make someone who calls me best friend believe I truly feel they are MY best friend as well. Unfortunately I am acting. It's all been an act. And I tried to explain that to you over dinner and you just wouldn't listen.. no wonder why I don't talk to you about anything. You never turn down your brain to listen to me. I was saying that I have been nothing but nice to her from the start. Never have I ever snapped back, never have I ever shown hurt when she degrades me in front of people, never have I ever told her just how much I really dislike her because of the way she holds me captive. I'm stuck. I'm stuck, I'm stuck and no one will help me. My social interactions have completely deteriorated because of her. She's someone that no one really likes... she's rude, no filter, repeats things over and over, things mean things are funny, wants to be better than everyone else, and treats me like her pet. I'm not a friend, I'm a punching bag. So why do I pretend to like her? I know exactly what I'm doing. I'm stabbing her little sinister ways in the back. Once high school ends and I leave her like a sack of potatoes, it's going to sting. Terribly. And that's just what it is. The karma I've built up around her for four years. She'll realize everything she's done to me wasn't just brushed off, it was simply shoved aside so that it can topple back into her. But maybe you're right. Maybe I'm mean. Maybe I'm just like everybody else. And maybe karma is just going to bite me instead. But I can't help it... I've been friendly and nice to everyone I meet. They love me but they also realize how easy it is to take advantage of me. I'm not doing anything because they have all earned it in the long run. I've watched it. I've watched my bad friends from the past stab me in the back numerous times, only to fall victim to more bad people. I don't do anything. I simply give them the harness and let them walk ahead of me, because they've already mended the wall ahead. I may have been milking it. Saying things that make her believe I care about her when I don't. Makes me human. A cruel machine of bitterness and destruction. If it means leaving behind my friends next year, just to get out of going to school with her again, I'll take the lonely trail. Not like I like other people anyway. I've lived lonely before. No new wounds.
Why do you think I want to leave so bad? Why would I lie about wanting to move halfway across the USA just to live alone? With Bear... I'll take Bear, but why? Everything here, it's at my disposal. I won't really miss anything. I've hated this place from the start. There's nothing here for me in the long run. I've always wanted to leave. It will make you sad you say? Well it will kill me to stick around. I haven't made any progress in life here. Since when we moved in 2011, I'm just where I started. No real friends, a thousand miles from my true desires, and still stuck in ghastly situations that degrade my mental state. I can't just tell you this... not because you won't listen, or you won't care, but because you don't believe me and my motives. I wish I could give you just a taste of my pain. Just a memory I hold. I don't belong here. This city wasn't made for me. The people weren't here for me. Maybe I don't belong anywhere. If I move and that doesn't satisfy my hunger for stability... I don't know where else to go. I'm terrified for my future. What will become of me? How can I pick myself up just one more time, knowing a stone will be cast from my audience to strike me down again? Will you look at me? Will you soothe my aching soul and breaking heart? I'm falling apart right under your nose and you don't see the misery? I'm sorry that I'm this way... I'm sorry that I make people believe I like them when they don't treat me right. In anyone's sane mind they would have tossed them aside like a chicken bone, but not me... I just stay stuck in the belly of a dog that barks a million insults, and heaves a thousand hurtful comments. I build people up while they tear me down. I'm the one stuck on the bottom of the ocean floor while they float on the buoy of self esteem, hand crafted by yours truly. They don't see me, they see my faults, my worst charms, my insecurities and turn that into their own power. S loves that about me. She loves it when I screw up, and despite all the good things I've done for her and the things I've said, that's what stands out. My mistakes. She's on top of them like a hound, ripping them away from me to show everyone that she's better because she didn't make it, I did. It's always me. If she messes up I don't say a word but if I make the same mistake... it's for everyone to gawk at. You know why I think I do it? Why I make her believe I like her just as much? I think it has something to do with the power of my own tolerance. A power that gives me the upper hand in the end, and the sweet sweet image of their face when they realize that Im gone. They kept their adoring little bird in the cage too long. Kept their loyal dog on a chain too long. Kept their friend waiting for a change too long. Does it make me a bad person? Have I strayed so far from my morals that I have become unworthy of such a high heir to the throne of morality? Is it humane to act under such circumstances? Have I disappointed you..? I'm sorry, but twelve years of schooling and poor judgement in friends has given me a new opportunity in activities. Acting. Of course there are things that I really am caring about, things that I do not, under any reason, act my feelings towards. However it is a select few things. And may come hard to tell whether it is I am lying or not. Which makes telling people I care spark the question against myself, do you really? Do you really? (Realized this got way long). Point is... I wanted to open up to you, I wanted to show you my feelings about the situation but you turned me away. I'm sorry it's come to this, having to post on a website because I can't just tell you myself. It's pathetic.
~ Your walking corpse of a teenager

[casiopea]

dear 26,

You really thought I didn't notice your awkward efforts to talk to me at first?
I didn't understand at first, so I blame myself for not actually talking much to you and being friends with you.
I knew you liked me (it was painfully obvious) and hey, so did I! But I avoided you and didn't talk to you and I was passive-aggressive towards you to hide the fact that I did, and instead in the end I scared you away (at least I think I did?)
I just wanted to say I'm sorry for acting mean towards you, I was...hiding. I can't understand how you're so open to everything? I'm out here hiding my feelings by avoiding you and you actually seek me out and try to talk with me? That takes a lot, y'know? Anyway, I'm sorry for being such a butt to you. You're actually not a bad person, I hope I can try and summon enough courage to go up and talk to you someday.

- c

---

dear chimchar/kimchi/mikey,

haha, yes I know how much you dislike those first two nicknames...but I'm using them anyway.
I can't believe you're still my friend? I dunno what I'd do without ya, you're great. I still remember
the day I met you, I made a reference to a song and we were instantly buddies. Happy early birthday to you too.

- c/jason ( are we ever gonna drop the nicknames tho...haha )

---

dear bee/snake,

oh boy.
I guess you're the reason I'm not so trusting and open to others.
after what you did I was terrified that everybody would do the same to me.
I don't talk to people much after what happened, and I'm still terrified that every word I say or write could at one point be held against me or shown to others or made fun of.
I'm glad we don't really talk anymore.

- c

---

dear g,

hi you probably don't know me but I look up to you a lot?? you're amazing, keep up the good work 👍

- cheez

---

dear o,

I can't believe you've stuck with me for a year+ ??
ever since you sent me that first pm we've been friends ever since
we went through some ups and downs and I agree there were sometimes where you were downright disagreeable, but that hasn't stopped us from being friends.
even though we all have our flaws, I think you're pretty neat.

- cheez

---

dear friends (the Team™),

i miss you guys!
remember the streams?? and the pm chat we had?
those were fun times! i miss talking with you guys
i don't know how we broke apart but yea it was really sad to see you guys go
I hope we can talk again sometime?? somehow
i'll always remember the time we all spent together
the good and the bad too

- your friend cheez

[tenor]

dear jen,

pay attention to me plz ;3;
stop hugging all over your boy-friend and your gay-friend ;3;
please hug on me for once
every time that you and that boy break up i'm here
every time that you and the gaybie fight i'm here
but no matter what happens in my life you're never here??
;3; please love me
i'm your best friend, please realize this ;3;

-a very sad smol bean