I lost my best friend...

[KleinerRyan]

I dont know what to say tbh..

I feel lost, angry and sad.

My cat Ryan had passed away on tuesday 10/29/2024 at 9.50am.

After 14 Years of friendship and family hes left us. Sadly we didnt know what he had i was since about 20 days daily at the vet to assist him so he might recover.
No fip no diabetes. We speculated that he had something with his heart and it feels like maybe cancer or dementia.
3 months ago he was torally nornal but was hiding alot. I noticed but didnt thought i should go to the vet with him. We went to multiple vets anf hr had water in his belly. Had an infection around his belly aswell and he couldnt poop alot.
I can say the last hours before he left, he had water everywhere.
I couldnt eat and drink but wanted to. He enjoyed the day before we had to put him down. Relaxed in the sun, was very cuddley and communicative.
Just as i know him but very hesatent/slow since he couldnt move much.
His left leg declibed rapidly and was like not movable to walk at all.
Itd pretty hard to write that but ive no idea if you had something like this before, wanna help or share your story either way im glad that you are here.

When i called my mom from work and picked her up Ryan was like greeting her, that was the only thing that he did activly.

He did his last meow after the the vet gave him the shot. Whe was kinda curly backwards as something would hurt.. it was horrible to watch.
I feel guilty for everything i did and i messed up everything. I did not deserve him

He was communicative, supersweet, friendly, cuddly and i woulf say perfect. Perfect for our family and i bet he would have been the perfect therapy cat.
He knew some tricks: high five, sit, paw and standup sometimes speak aswell.

He was very vocal but not in a bad way.

He greeted with a humming and meow and was always talking back if you asked him something. He also did communicate with paws and stuff.
When i came home from work he alway notices the car by sound. He was sitting in our yard and waiting for the last persob of our household to arrive.
When i arrived he did his 2 factor authentification. He noticed how we walked but didnt came near if we didnt speak. When we spoke he started rolling on the ground and leading us to the house. Everytime everyone got around and was talking he was sitting on the table anf rolled himself to a lil cinnabun and sleeped. He teached us how to talke care of us and stay together.
That we dont need much and enjoy the lil things. And ofc love.

His favorite food was chicken in diffrent forms and cheese.

He was pretty small and he vollected over the 14 years 50 names that we gave him and he responded to every single one of them.

Instead of mice, he braught aus sock every morning when he was younger.

He never left our property and he had a typical daily routine.

When an another cat came to our yard he was curious but not aggressive but he chased them always to the next car and then came back.
He has been here for almost half of my life snd with him, a part of me is gone.
Hes my best friend and i dont wanna let him, i cant.

He needed always to be around us and was always on eve level. When we ate, he sat beside and ate too. When i put my arms on the table and make a circle, he would walk right up to it and flop over and curl inside it.

So many headbumps, headscratches and neckkisses.

He was a very calm cat in general, very chill and super sweet. Altho he was anxious around strangers.

I tried to give him the word. He had his own balcony where he sunbathed alot. He loooves wood ald loves to sleep on or near firewood aswell, i guess the smell is amazing! Which i also love tbh.
In generell you csn say he was kinda like me or i was kinda like him.

We enjoyed sleeping and cuddeling, giving kisses and overall talk!

I wanna write alot but i guess it will never been viewed..

Before i got him i had a cat which got to 6 after he vanished.
I never got over him and i will never get over Ryan.

I dont know if someone will ever read this or thid might deleted (which i dont hope)

If you read this, thank you for reading. I might add some more informations lateron but now my head is kinda empty...

[WinterWolf12]

I'm sorry about your best friend, I have lost many animals in my life and it never gets any better People have always told me that time will eventually heal the wound but it never really does, I find myself always talking about them. I'm here if you need someone to talk to, no one will ever know another persons grief when it comes to losing a beloved best friend like those who have gone through it.

[ArcticangelWolf]

I'm so sorry for your loss.

Earlier last year I had to make the very sudden and unexpected decision to put down my best friend of 15 years, Sassy. She was a large gray cat with the most beautiful green eyes, and came home with my dad when I was about 5 years old as a stray. My dad thought she was a good sign for our family, and after checking to ensure that she was nobody else's kitten, we made her an official member of our family.

She had always had weight issues though, and despite our best attempts at weight loss for her, they just never really worked. She wasn't a very playful thing, but she was very cuddly and talkative and had a ton of personality. In her old age, she started throwing up a lot (she was a medium-coat, so she had some throw up issues in the past, but never too bad). She had some pretty clear arthritis which I'm sure was exacerbated by her weight, and her coat was falling out. The vet told me I could either administer a medication to her that may make the situation worse, or I could decide to put her down that day.

I had taken her into the vet for a normal checkup that day, and brought my bunny, Angel, along to get his nails trimmed. We went to the vet with two pets and left with one. I couldn't stay in the room when they put her down, and I will forever regret that decision. The process wasn't fun; one tech in the room was being incredibly judgmental. And it killed me to walk away after.

I just know that I didn't make her suffer, and I have to remind myself that we outlive them. That they go someplace warm and safe, and that we can brave the world knowing that they had our love and support all the way through their life, knowing nothing but comfort.

It will perhaps not get better, but easier, with time. This is the best community to share with. Thank you. <3