im sorry i jsut kind of keep using this thread to vent but. im still struggling so much, i accidentally rung the bell on his collar today and whirled around to see where he was and. it broke my heart realizing all over again that he would never be there again. i can't get the image of him at the vet out of my head.
i do really appreciate all the support so so much but even now it's just so overwhelming, everything is overwhelming. just now as i thought i was fine with it all at least somewhat it just. struck me so much again, and every little task seems so much. i'm sorry