Book Writers' Nook

[Wolfin]

I've written some of my new story, Sarge. It's 779 words so far. I'm almost finished Day One. There will be three days in a chapter.

[Pharaoh]

I like this one! It's true! Or, at least for me XD

xD Here's one more. It doesn't rhyme, but I feel it's got a good flow.


The writer keeps on writing.
It's never very simple.
Sometimes when it is looking bleak.
It ends up so divine.
The writer keeps on writing.
The songs are sung in tune.
The daily light drifts daintily.
Across the little room.

As day becomes a night-time.
And sun becomes a moon.
The writer keeps on writing.
To that same, familiar rhyme.
It's never really easy.
To explain the sudden urge.
But the writer knows just when to write.
And the time is now, tonight's the night.

When it comes to writing stories.
It's quite plain, as you can see.
When you're not up writing big tales.
You're as low as you can be.
But the writer keeps on writing.
And they never let it stop.
For when you're at the highest point.
You cannot let it drop.

And then you hit rock-bottom.
And your fame is gone away.
So the writer keeps on writing.
And fulfills themselves each day.
The speech is flowing faster.
And the sun is begins to rise.
Yet the muse is here, and without fail.
So the writer keeps it up.

They do not know quite what they write.
But they know they must, going day and night.
Until they see with satisfied eyes.
That they've done their perfect job.
So if ever you feel like writing.
You'd better go find your pen.
For the writer keeps on writing.
And the never stop, you know.

[Aven]

I like it ^^

[Pharaoh]

I like it ^^

Thanks!

[avyron]

This is the first short paragraph for my story....
any critism is valued, but please bear in mind this is only the first draft, I will write it properly when the whole book is written

The vast vale of the ancient realm of Torin basked in the radiance that followed the setting of the sun, its spires and fortifications stabbing upwards into the deep blue of the western sky where the velvet of night threatened. The Wandering Star, the bright herald of dusk, glimmered silently low on the red and gold horizon. The daily bustle of the city was beginning to quiet and the torches were being lit along the main avenues and along the bluestone fountain in the centre of the main plaza. The pink hue in the sky was reflected in the restless waters and the Wandering Star was echoed, dancing on the wavelets.
Frael, lieutenant of the Guard, cupped his hands and drew some of the water over his brow, disturbing the fountain pool so that the reflection of the sinking sun was a mass of dancing and brilliant diamonds. A noise behind him caused him to turn and, replacing his helm, he watched in quiet interest as a tall woman scrambled frantically through the twisting, tree lined avenues of the city towards him. Several people she passed at a dead run gave a pause to stare curiously at the dark-haired woman running with such haste through the cobbled streets. She reached the top of the street and hesitated, turning back to stare across the valley, past the gold-stained city walls and turrets into the shimmering, winding river beyond. In the light of the dying sunset, the fertile green valley glowed orange and the distant snow-topped mountains were capped in scarlet fire.
Turning away from the stunning view, she caught sight of Frael and started slightly. He stiffened, coming to attention with the barest flick of his head and twich of his heels. Meeting her eyes he froze awaiting reprimand, but the gaze broke and she veered sharply to the right and continued at a blistering pace past tall, ivy-covered structures until she reached the aged wooden doorway of the Blacksmith’s. She barged in and the door closed with a sharp snap behind her.
Frael relaxed slightly and breathed out in relief. Without looking back, he began to walk nonchalantly away from the fountain, he would post himself elsewhere this night.
Inside the hot, dim smithy, a small child flung himself against his mother with a cry of joy. Raiya tensely returned his grip with tears in her eyes and then sent a meaningful look at the dark figure awaiting her silently in the shadows.
The silhouette rose with a smooth, smoke-like motion and came forward silently into the light. His eyes shone with an amber malevolence beneath a dark hood, but he placed a finely formed hand upon the boy’s shoulder and called almost tenderly to him. The boy drew back fearfully from his mother, but then embraced the strange figure in farewell, before departing from the room.
Raiya watched her child leave with concern showing through the premature lines on her face and her brown eyes glanced toward the dark shadow. She placed a reassuring hand upon his shoulder which he shook off irritably. Raiya hesitated a moment with her hand still outstretched, opened her mouth to apologise but was silenced by an impatient nod of acknowledgment from the figure. She glanced fearfully at the door then moved closer and spoke in a hoarse whisper...
“We were betrayed, they are coming for you.”
The amber eyes flashed again in anger and perhaps, a hint of concern. She turned her face away from the penetrating stare and clutched at the gre y medallion in her hand. The tall figure moved forward with snake-like speed and grasped her hand with such force that the edge cut into her hand causing her to gasp in pain. He wrenched her fingers open exposing the image of a rampant steel dragon to the fading light. Those fearsome eyes locked onto her own, and he spoke in a voice which was barely more than a callous hiss in the dark;
“Argon?”
She looked away to hide the fear in her eyes at the mention of the grey knight, but he dragged her watery gaze back.
“Gone...” she said quietly “He saved me from them.”
For a moment he did not respond, but then he pushed her away and let out an unearthly, inhuman cry into the velvety darkness, slamming both his fists into the rough wooden table, which shattered under a force no man should be able to weald. For a moment, his form seemed to waver like a black and opaque smoke and something else, another shape was visible... but the moment passed, and he was solid, composed and quiet.
He moved to the fallen Raiya and pulled her to her feet. Yet again the eyes locked, but this time Raiya perceived something else, not anger or a fierce front, but pity, sadness and an empty hollow where hope should have been. He did not speak, nor apologise for his lack of composure, his outburst, but he meant it, and she understood. For an instant, they were back to when Raiya was a child, when the sinister and ancient figure beside her had laughed, before he had fallen into the darkness, standing upon the golden battlement, speaking silently, heart to heart.

Several days later, Raiya stood upon the parapet watching the fires from the armies camped on the plateau before the bronze city gates. The red dragon emblazoned across the mighty doors roaring in silent defiance at those who dared intrude. Behind her the mighty town bells tolled the warning and called eerily for aid. She gazed southward for any suggestion of the familiar form against the sky, but there was none. Surely this ominous absence only confirmed that the Lord Avyron had been destroyed and they were on their own. Her thoughts turned to her son and to protecting him from the ravages of the marauders. Noiselessly, and without hope, she descended the worn stone stairway and headed back to her home.
That evening, a soft rain rustled gently across the earth, and pattered like tears upon the faces of the fallen. Raiya lay cold amongst the smouldering remains of the city of Torin; her body abandoned to the elements and carrion birds. Her distraught orphaned son was fleeing amongst a group of charred refugees on their way to the barren Jyan scrublands to seek refuge, a grey medallion on his chest. The once prosperous city and peoples of Torin was no more...

[Pharaoh]

xD Short paragraph?

[avyron]

oops, meant short chapter not paragraph

[Rainpelt]

Very good, I liked it. If you decide to let us read more later, I would definately be interested.

I'm at 859 words and counting.

[Pharaoh]

I'd love some critique on this; yes, this is the beginning of the second story, not the first. I'm writing them out of order. Any guesses on what it's about?

The chilling frost bit my face, something I could never find comforting, no matter the circumstances. And these circumstances were nothing less than terror. But for a girl like me, it was almost useless to be scared. I'd been through so much, hardly anything amounted to my greatest fear. Even now, in the chill of night, where nothing would ever lurk. Me in my black and bulk, safe and warm, and still the cold could gnaw my skin into a raw rash. I clicked off my radio, drowning out the usual jovial ignorance to the situation in a frightening hollow emptiness. Ignorance may have been bliss to some, but I found my newest line of work to be nothing less than professional. A clear head was what I needed most. Some people said it was probably some kind of Attention Deficit Disorder, but I just shrugged it off. It made me smarter. It was obviously a good thing.

The silence was cold and lonely. I was so tempted to turn the radio on, to make light of the situation, if only for a moment, so I could be free. Free from the slightest terror the gripped at my heart almost as painfully as the night air. I breathed out and watched the puff of smoke rise, sighing. I was propped against a tree with my larger gun to my right, and the smaller ones on my belt. My body was adorned with pack upon pack of my precious ammo. Each of my packs had four tranquilizer bullets loaded with the strongest, most effective penicillin known to man. It was the one thing that had kept me and the rest of the team alive, and would save the entire human race if it were given the chance to. That's what we were. Freedom fighters, saving the human race from themselves.

I decided it was too suspenseful to sit in black silence, so I unhappily turned on my radio. It too was silent, and so I spoke out.
"Any sign yet?" I asked in my quiet voice, waiting the reply out. After a brief moment of pause, there was a reply.
"No, but we were just in some deep thought, Katty." Trent spoke, but the usual joke in his voice was gone. He was serious. "This could all happen again eventually. How long can we keep fighting?"
"Long as it takes." I replied plainly. "And you know I don't like nicknames, Trent." I could practically feel him roll his eyes.
"Come on, Katie, just relax. You get so high-strung." Marcus cut in, and I shook my head. There was more brief silence, before I thought I heard something crackle.
"I'm off." I said, and clicked my radio. That was when I heard the first screams.

- - - - -

I fired my gun into the bushes, and listened as there was a rustle and stumbling feet. Then a soft thud, and silence. But there wasn't silence in my mind. Blood coursing through my veins with painful pounding, I took a deep breath and shot again. And again. And again. There were probably ten shots fired before I knew I was surrounded. I grabbed one low-hanging branch of the tree and hauled myself up, perching up in the rustling leaves. A few more shots fired, and I could see a distinctive ring around the tree. They were a thicker mob than usual, completely overrun and rotten and frightening. I hated the very thought. Shuddering, I reloaded my gun and fired a few more times.

Finally, I had managed to clear through the throng below me. Groaning bodies of those who were still not unconscious sucked me back into the memories. He was out there somewhere. I had to find him. To save him. He was wrong to tell me that he liked it. Nobody liked being out of control. Nobody wanted to be such a monster. Especially him. He was always so kind to me, and to others. It was as if he'd completely lost his mind. Well, of course he had. It was no surprise that any of us were still suffering from the damage done. Even me, the fearless leader of the squad, was still considered legally insane. It was getting better though, when it came to thinking straight. I still lost myself sometimes, though. It's never a steady thing, being crazy. Especially when you fight it.

"What you thinking about?" I heard a lone voice call out. Not on my headset. I looked down in terror to see Odell sitting at the base of the tree. She cast her eyes up at me and grinned, amused by my terror. She held a small scanner in her hand and was reading the poor victims to see what the damage was.
"Stuff." I murmured in frustration. She never seemed to know how not to meddle.
"Sheesh, moody." She continued her work and we waited in silence a while before she finally looked up at me again. "You know, you're not the only one who misses him." She spoke softly, and with that kind of a tone, especially from Odell, I couldn't be mad. I only managed to sigh.
"He... he... disowned me..." He managed to stutter out softly.
"And how exactly did he do that?"
"By telling me he... was happy with it all. How he didn't want to be better."
"And he hurt you?"
"He was going to kill himself!" I screeched like a bird of prey. Odell was the pitiful mouse beneath me, and yet even she seemed more powerful than me. "You would never understand." She opened her mouth to speak, but instead looked away and scanned the last person.

"This town was farther gone than the rest." Another voice cut through the frozen air. "I'm not surprised that they are all too far gone."
"Probably." Odell corrected Marcus as he walked up. I looked away at my gun, reloading it as slowly as I could so I didn't have to look at him.
"Probably lost it." He muttered, and I could almost feel his gaze resting on me. Yep. He knew I'd lost it too.
"You're probably right." Odell spoke monotonously. "But either way, life is life." I knew she'd saved my skin again, but I still couldn't find the means to thank her. Finally, there were more footsteps.

"Well, that's everyone." Marcus said and, seeing that I was fumbling to retrieve the remaining bullets from my pack, he tossed me a few extra blank rounds.
"Kat stuck in a tree?" I heard Trent call. Rolling my eyes, I loaded and accidentally shot a perfect blank round into his water pouch. Water spilled from a little hole, and Trent cursed me in a whisper.
"Mature, guys." Marcus called out.
"She started it!" Trent whined, which resorted in both me and Trent with our tongues sticking out at one another. Even if I hated it, he always found a way to get some joy out of me. He was one of the few who could. I smiled as I leaned back against my branch for some much-needed relaxation.

"Looks like you've stolen yet another trick, Katie." I heard a young voice call out from behind Trent, and little Ann swung herself up a few branches above me.
"Yeah, well, I wanted to see what it was like to be a monkey." I retorted, and Ann knocked a branch against my head teasingly.
"We're done here, and I just finished the radio to Command. Best to move out now and not get caught up in traffic." Odell said with a grin, standing up from her crouched position.
"And paperwork." Marcus said, and with a laugh, we were all on the ground and heading out.

- - - - -

The next city over was even less illuminated than the previous. It had once been a part of the previous town, but after the declared apocalypse survivors had burned the connecting buildings and roads to protect themselves. In the end, however, if never worked. They were still infected and still a problem. Probably not as bad as the previous spot we'd been, but I figured that there wouldn't be any survivors from this town either. The farther East we moved, the worse it all got. Buildings burned down by hopefuls making a last stand attempt, only to be captured and killed anyway by the sheer mob of dying, rotting shells. Humans had lost themselves this time, and we were the only ones to be of any help now.

Well, we all had decent experience when it came to falling ill. I had dragged myself as far West as I could manage to find a safe haven to call my new home. On the way I'd run into Trent and Odell. Back then Odell had been a small, quiet, soft-spoken girl. I kinda missed that side of her now. She always found a way to meddle in my life. I'd left with Sam, and Emma. Sam and I had been in love. Emma was my best friend, and we had promised to never be separated. On the way, we'd run into some trouble, but the worst was with Sam. He'd been touched. Infected. So he'd left one night to keep us safe. Of course, I'd found out about the cure, and we'd made our way to California separately.

Long story short, I'd gotten infected too, but cured. That's when Sam decided he didn't want to be cured. He wanted to die instead. Now my mission was to make sure nobody had that option again, and that everyone would live. Trent hadn't gotten sick, but Odell had. Because of it, she'd gotten stronger. Built a lot of muscle and a tough disposition too. Trent was perfect for the job either way, but actually injected the disease and then the cure into himself so that he knew what he was messing with. Almost died. I still hate him for that. Ann had been found when we'd first set off to help clear out the dead and dying. The little thing was full of fight, and we quickly took her under our wing.

[Toothless.]

Eh... Zombies? Atack of the over-ripe tomatoes? Halo-esque plot of sorts?

Lol, random guesses

I like your style