
Ray [f] + Henry [m] : a girl and her imaginationAfter a long, exhausting high school day, I finally get a chance to rest. I climb up to my room, slowly dragging my heavy school bag up the stairs, and collapse into my bed.
The bed is the only place in the room where there is enough space to do anything, despite being unmade and covered in plushies. The floor, the desk, and the chair are cluttered with paper, pencils, and random objects that don't really fit anywhere but that I still refuse to get rid of. The shelves are bursting with boxes, books, and old toys; the little garbage bin is overflowing with chocolate bar wrappers, and the walls are almost completely covered in drawings.
This is home.
This is the place where I can hide when things are going wrong. This is the place where I can cry myself to sleep, or talk to myself about meaningless but still painful problems, or listen to whatever music I feel like and dance along if I want to, or just lie down and think. Here, I can lock myself up until my troubles are gone, and the only ones who can see it are my own creations.
They are my best friends, my creations. They live in spectacular fantasy worlds that exist only in my mind. They like to tell me their stories; incredible adventures that always have happy endings. I dream of having a happy ending like theirs.
But today, happy endings like these seem impossible. It has been a hard day, and all I can do is bury my face in my pillow and let my tears soak it. The painful thoughts of today bring back even more painful thoughts of the past, but the only thing I can do about it is continue to cry.
It is at times like this when I need my creations most, but I have become so discouraged that I have convinced myself that they do not exist. They can't be real... it just doesn't make sense... I made them up, they can't come out of my mind... no, they're not real, and their happy endings are not real either. I will never live "happily ever after". I might as well not live at all...
Suddenly, I feel strong, gentle arms around me. I can hear someone breathing in my ear, feel its warmth on my skin. A quiet voice that sounds as if it is coming from my own thoughts speaks to me softly. I can't quite make out what it is saying, but just the sound of it is enough. I recognize the voice: it is one of my newest and favorite creations, Henry.
He is a wonderful young gentleman who lives in the most beautiful little fairytale village, and he is still waiting for his happy ending to come. He has told me that he dreams of finding the perfect girl, because he wants nothing more than to be loved. He worries that he is not good enough for his dream girl, and if he ever finds her, she won't love him. But he never gives up hope, even at the hardest of times. He shouldn't really be worrying anyway, I'm sure his dream girl will love him. He is a very sweet, handsome and romantic young man, and any girl would be lucky to have him.
Now, he is whispering to me in a very gentle voice, arms still holding me in a comforting embrace. I can now hear that he is telling me that I mustn't think thoughts like that, because there is always a reason to live. He tells me that I should never give up on my happy ending; it's bound to come sooner or later. And if it never comes, at least I can say I tried...
Then he tells me something that changes everything. Something that does not stop the tears, but that changes them; changes them from tears of pain to tears of shock and of joy. All he says are five little words, but those words are what bring me hope. Hope of getting through life, hope of pushing through hard times, hope of someday finding my happily ever after.
My creations may not truly exist, but the ways that they can change me are very real. They can always make me feel better when I'm upset. And with the right words, at the right time, they can change my life.
I know that Henry's words will always stay with me. They will always echo in my mind just as clearly as they do now:
"You are my happy ending."---
...bleh. I've never really attempted anything this long, especially this late at night... hopefully it's not too terrible. ^^;