New Rule: DNI (Do Not Interact) Lists are Banned

[Paintra]

Thank you for this new rule!
Also... I was thinking about it and does this rule also apply to people who use sentences like "anti-hoarders"; "do not support hoards"; "do not trade with me if you hoard" etc?

Hi, I have a question that may or may not be tangentially related to this rule- is it permitted to put on your profile "please do not send me messages about x?" (assuming x is a thing permitted to be talked about on CS, like trading a certain pet, or things like that) I have never had a DNI and I think I may be struggling slightly to understand exactly what this rule is disallowing, apologies if this doesn't make sense.

A couple questions which I think may have been buried by the discussion that I'm curious about- if mine doesn't make sense I can totally elaborate!

[viles]

• are lists of boundaries still okay to have in profiles? i like to have that there for the people who choose to interact with me. in particular, i have asked people not to send me videos with eating sounds, as those can cause me to have meltdowns due to my misophonia. i have seen other people ask about byi lists, and i believe this would be of the same vein. however, i wanted to get a clear answer before putting something like this in my profile.

[Matreats]

Yeah, I definitely agree with this rule

It's weird to me that people will actively display the things that bother/trigger them most - like, it's not going to help, it's pretty much an invitation and a list of things to do for people who are going to break your DNI list anyway

[Seasonal]

Thank you for this new rule!
Also... I was thinking about it and does this rule also apply to people who use sentences like "anti-hoarders"; "do not support hoards"; "do not trade with me if you hoard" etc?

Hi, I have a question that may or may not be tangentially related to this rule- is it permitted to put on your profile "please do not send me messages about x?" (assuming x is a thing permitted to be talked about on CS, like trading a certain pet, or things like that) I have never had a DNI and I think I may be struggling slightly to understand exactly what this rule is disallowing, apologies if this doesn't make sense.

A couple questions which I think may have been buried by the discussion that I'm curious about- if mine doesn't make sense I can totally elaborate!

Anti-hoard statements are not permitted.

Saying something like "Please do not message me about apples" is fine because you are excluding a topic, not an individual.

• are lists of boundaries still okay to have in profiles? i like to have that there for the people who choose to interact with me. in particular, i have asked people not to send me videos with eating sounds, as those can cause me to have meltdowns due to my misophonia. i have seen other people ask about byi lists, and i believe this would be of the same vein. however, i wanted to get a clear answer before putting something like this in my profile.

Yes, saying something like "Please don't message me [specific type of video]" is fine.

[Neoncherry64]

• are lists of boundaries still okay to have in profiles? i like to have that there for the people who choose to interact with me. in particular, i have asked people not to send me videos with eating sounds, as those can cause me to have meltdowns due to my misophonia. i have seen other people ask about byi lists, and i believe this would be of the same vein. however, i wanted to get a clear answer before putting something like this in my profile.

Putting “please don’t send me videos of x” is way different from “don’t trade with me if you like x” or “don’t interact if you believe x.”

Although I will say, for your safety I would not recommend even putting that information out publicly. You are far more likely to receive an eating video from an internet bully if you specifically post that you are triggered by them than if you do not mention it at all. It’s unfortunate, but there are malicious and mean people out there who actively search people’s trigger lists and send them triggering content.

[Paintra]

Thank you for this new rule!
Also... I was thinking about it and does this rule also apply to people who use sentences like "anti-hoarders"; "do not support hoards"; "do not trade with me if you hoard" etc?

Hi, I have a question that may or may not be tangentially related to this rule- is it permitted to put on your profile "please do not send me messages about x?" (assuming x is a thing permitted to be talked about on CS, like trading a certain pet, or things like that) I have never had a DNI and I think I may be struggling slightly to understand exactly what this rule is disallowing, apologies if this doesn't make sense.

A couple questions which I think may have been buried by the discussion that I'm curious about- if mine doesn't make sense I can totally elaborate!

Anti-hoard statements are not permitted.

Saying something like "Please do not message me about apples" is fine because you are excluding a topic, not an individual.

Thank you!

[viles]

• Putting “please don’t send me videos of x” is way different from “don’t trade with me if you like x” or “don’t interact if you believe x.”

  
  thank you for your response. this has been helpful /gen
  
  edit: thank you to seasonal as well for the response. apologies. i did not see this before, or i would have said something in my original post.

[sunburst333]

anyways its obvious nothings gonna change anyones mind on this and saying the same things over and over again isnt gonna help either so im out. have fun guys.

also done just couldn't be bothered to say it lol

[stormy tom]

So agree with this, while i'm just a "normal" (what even is normal lol) person it's still interesting to hear others views or opinions and even to chat about it even if you disagree. You can learn something but so can the other person.
My dad for one is quite against same gender couples and a few other things, which i don't agree with him on.
While it can be tiring arguing with him about it i have to understand he's had a different upbringing, just him being in his 50 and me being in my 20's is a huge difference in how society has viewed different people.

It's only become common to see different genders that weren't discussed as openly earlier and it's super hard for older people to understand how fast everything has changed.

Yes! I have frustrating conversations with my parents too, but they've definitely moved over a little, and it's been worth it. Have those hard conversations! If it's safe, of course, but this is how change is effected!
We're too divided, and too scared of the mildest confrontation. I can only see DNIs playing into that. If someone is in a fandom you can't stand, block them if they're annoying in general, not on the basis of their interests. If they hold political beliefs you disagree with and it comes up in conversation in a harmful manner, block them. If you can, maybe discuss it a little. Don't compromise your mental health, but sometimes the smallest challenge of someone's beliefs can make a big difference. Or even just being willing to engage with them. If we shut out everyone we disagree with, we'll never make progress. If you're not in a safe place to be doing that, look after yourself first, of course, but please consider it.

[ophanimera]

I am personally very grateful that DNI lists are no longer allowed purely for the bullet point quoted below.

• For more specific entries, DNI lists endanger users by giving a comprehensive list of all the things that would upset, trigger, or harm that user. Especially with the young user base on CS, not all users may realize the danger of posting such a list. In the same vein, DNI lists may encourage targeting of said vulnerable users, or make bullying or harassment by a bad actor more dangerous. This makes their potential harm much greater than their potential benefit.

The latest social media trend of oversharing every single aspect about oneself and carrying with you the expectation that there is absolutely no one with ill intent who is going to use that against you is alarming on multiple levels. There is simply too much trust in strangers not to weaponize the information you put out against you, especially if you’re going around and trying to interact with the community at large.

On top of that, DNI lists act as a way to shirk responsibility for your own squicks and triggers, especially those which are common to encounter on the Internet, so I’m grateful to see them gone from ChickenSmoothie.