sunken secrets :: a stars 3000 tryout form. (dnp)

[crexmii]

“ 𝐥𝐞𝐭 𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐲𝐨𝐮.”
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
“why’d you train me to fight? (why’d you train me, ah)”
═══════════════════════
“wake up!! you can’t miss the first day
of training!”

groggily, the plum furred kit jerked slowly awake.
his fur was ruffled, as he had turned and rolled
over quite a lot in his sleep.

“helios! come along.” the voice of his mentor
made him jump, and rushing to smooth down his
ruffled fur, he padded over to the medicine den to check
in on glowpaw, striking up a short conversation with him.

“HELIOS!” petalpatch’s voice sounded once again. he
immediately skittered over to the entrance of camp,
where his new mentor was waiting.

“finally! you kept me waiting for moons!” petalpatch grunted,
tail flicking impatiently from side to side.

helios blinked apolegtically, ears twitching. “so…what
are we doing for my first training session?”

“we’re going to learn how to hunt. and then maybe practise
some battle tactics.” petalpatch’s replied indifferently.
“so I hope you’re up to the job.”

helios nodded eagerly and slowly trailed behind her.
———————————

helios listened to petalpatch closely as she droned on
about hunting tactics and the best crouches, that kind of
stuff.

"now, you try." the deputy's voice cut through his thoughts.
"o...okay." helios mewed nervously. oh no, what if i fail?

just then, a scent flooded into his nose.
mouse.

trying desperately to remember petalpatch's hunting
techniques, helios crept slowly, silently. slinking through
the undergrowth, he followed the scent of mouse.

he heard tiny squeaks. there it was, unaware of helios,
happily munching on a seed.

helios crouched down in his best hunter's crouch,
slowly slinking closer and checking the ground for
twigs.

jump! his brain said.

helios pounced, crushing the mouse, attempting to
give it a killing bite. unfortunately, the mouse slipped
from his claws, leaving helios lying on the ground,
very annoyed and mildly dazed.

"aw, it's okay. that was only your first hunt. you'll
do better next time." petalpatch mewed with
sympathy, attempting to comfort the
disappointed apprentice.

helios nodded numbly. he knew that he would do better,
but with a huge destiny awaiting him, how could he fail
one tiny hunt?

plus, what would calythea think of him?
he curled up into a ball that night, dejectedly.
but staying still for the whole night is tiring,
and so helios eventually fell into dreamland.

-----------
he awoke to dreams, face to face with someone he
absolutely did NOT want so see.

"c..calythea?? i'm so sorry, i just couldn't catch that
mouse! i'm pretty sure it would have been such an
easy catch for you-" helios squeaked, acting like
an ashamed kit once again.

he hadn't felt like this since his mother had scolded
him and coal for sneaking out to explore the alleyways.

his family...

no time for thinking about them now.

to his surprise, calythea's gaze softened.

aw, it's okay, helios. since you are...struggling
at hunting, maybe...

helios winced at the word struggling.
even calythea probably thought he was
no good.

i know. let me teach you. i'll teach
you how to hunt and fight so well. it'll
make up for the great destiny you have ahead.

helios's eyes started to glow. calythea really did
appreiate him for trying his best! maybe...she could
be a better mentor than-

he cut that train of thought off. it wasn't fair to
blame petalpatch for..his mistakes.

suddenly, calythea's echoing voice jerked him back
into the dream realm.

alright. so we'll start with the basics...hunting. now,
drop into your best hunting crouch you can...

helios dropped into a hunting crouch and his heart
felt lighter. he'd be the best at his training tomorrow,
and he won't mess up at all!




═══════════════════════

[crexmii]

𝐝𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐧.
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
“don’t know what to believe (woo!)”
═══════════════════════
"wow, helios, you've gotten super good at hunting
in the past few moons!
are you being trained by one of the gods themselves or
something??" petalpatch joked, but helios could see that
she was impressed.

but wait. that last part..helios jerked. she doesn't know
i'm being taught by calythea, right?

helios glanced at petalpatch again, but there was no sign of
suspicion in her eyes.

phew, i guess that means she doesn't.

"okay, we're going to practise fighting techniques
again."

the apprentice wriggled excitedly. he had been taught
the basics of fighting by calythea, but petalpatch had
taught him all the advanced moves.

"okay. try to tackle me. ready, set, now!"
helios nimbly dodged a blow from his tortoiseshell
mentor, and with his claws sheathed, smacked her face.

petalpatch staggered back for a moment, then proceeded
to grab helios's tail and trap him under it.

helios felt clanborn all the way. after living in softclan
for several moons, he almost forgot entirely about his
past life as a loner.

"okay, helios! it's time to go back. you've had a long
day."

helios nodded and padded slowly beside his mentor
back to camp. suddenly, a cold zephyr
brushed his back fur, making it stand on end, and
he thought he glimpsed sage green amongst the bushes.

calythea's proud of me too! helios thought, happiness
flooding his heart.

---------------------

helios awoke in calythea's realm, as usual. he had been
training with her for one whole moon already.

but this time... something felt..off.

"calythea? hello? where are you?"
no response. once again, helios was alone.

just like the day when he was alone in the
forest.

just then, something rustled the bushes from
afar. was calythea trying to stalk and surprise him?

it didn't seem like something a forest spirit
would do...

"helios!" upon hearing his name being called, his
fur pricked. "who's there?!" helios growled in his
bravest voice, shivering. he hoped that whatever
called his name couldn't see he was extremely
scared, and got frightened off by his growl.

something stepped out of the bushes, and helios
whirled around as fast as the speed of light to
confront it.

something shaped like a cat emerged.
in fact, it was a cat. or, at least, helios thought
it was.

"who are you?" helios hissed in warning, neck fur
starting to bristle once again.

the newcomer was almost completely black, with
small patches of white on his paws, tail and on his chest.
he had a skinny build, even thinner than helios himself.

his ears, unlike a usual cat's, were pointed..downwards
instead of up. it was like they drooped so much
that they couldn't perk upright again.

or..as if his ears had been put on the wrong way.
upside down.

but the most peculiar thing about this cat was how his
luminous eyes seemed to glow in the dark.

calythea's realm wasn't all that bright, but the eyes
of the cat helios was face to face with were glowing
like the gentle moonlight. two large pupils stared
back into helios's eyes, like discs of night.

and the whites of his eyes almost seemed to glow..
yellow. not the bright yellow of the sun, nor the
mellow light shades of the meadow flowers.

no, this was different. it wasn't exactly yellow..
but not white either.

it was like the colour of ivory.

and his gaze was almost hypnotising...

helios shook his head and snapped out of the
trance. "why are you here?" he snarled in the
most intimidating way he could, narrowing his
eyes to the thinnest slits he could do, so thin
that helios was almost squinting whilst glaring.

then, the stranger moved and sat down.
he sat down so...tall and elegantly, almost like
a...

wait. "wait. are you friends with calythea?"
helios blurted, letting the curiosity get to him
before he could stop himself.

but the stranger merely stared, unblinking, until
he finally opened his mouth and mewed, "i guess
you could say that.."

helios found those six words very suspicious.
"answer me properly. who ARE YOU?"

the stranger twitched thoughtfully, and then he
replied, "i'm xeneth. the guardian of the endless
marsh."

huh. with such a fancy title like that..
could he be a god too? helios thought,
looking at the stranger - wait, no, xeneth-
in a new light.

"are you here to teach me today because
calythea isn't here?"

"ssh, not so loud! she doesn't know i'm here.
i'm here to warn you. about the danger you're
trifling with." xeneth hissed, and this time,
helios realised he wasn't that intimidating
after all. in fact, xeneth had a sort of nervous,
twitchy aura about him.

not very suitable for a god, he thought.

but helios decided to go along with it.

"what..danger?" the apprentice raised an eyebrow.

xeneth sighed, then repeated, "the danger? you don't
get it? forgive me for saying this, and you probably
won't trust me any more after this, but...the danger
i'm talking about is your beloved mentor herself."

"petalpatch?!" helios cried.

"no, no, no! calythea."

helios froze. "how is she a danger? she's really nice
and helps me with adjusting to clan life. it's quite
fun, actually. are you secretly evil or something?"
he hissed, an edge in his voice.

xeneth replied, unfazed by helios's hostility.
"don't you know? she just wants to use you.
she's trying to gain your trust."

helios opened his mouth to yowl a protest,
but suddenly he felt something next to him.

"now, now, now, xeneth. why are you here, in
MY realm? don't you have your own? my, my, i heard
that last bit. what are you trying to teach the kit
about me? are you trying to manipulate him? to
have him as your own?"

calythea's voice echoed from behind helios.

xeneth stood still, glaring at his fellow goddess.

"no, calythea, that's what you do. i'm just here
to warn him, he doesn't need to believe me."
the guardian hissed back, curling his thin,
elegant tail around his paws.

calythea merely scoffed, and then turned to helios,
her emerald gaze as sharp as ever.

"well then, let's have the kit decide. helios?"
she smirked, shooting a glance at xeneth.

helios had never felt so torn.

who should i pick? i trust calythea...but
what of xeneth is right?

he glanced up again. calythea was gazing at
him meaningfully, as if she truly cared about
his wellbeing, ignoring xeneth.

xeneth just glared daggers at calythea, glancing
worriedly at helios once.

helios took a deep breath, then mewed firmly,
"i trust calythea, xeneth. i'm not going to
leave her for a few rumours." he then
moved closer to her instinctively.

xeneth just sighed and was about to head off.

"this isn't over. if i catch you doing anything to
the kit-"

"which i certainly will not."

xeneth growled one last time, and disappeared,
fading back into the shadows of the realm.

"now that that's over, let's get back to our
training. oh, and if he comes back, don't
listen to him."

helios nodded, but couldn't help thinking;
did i make the right choice?



═══════════════════════

[crexmii]

“𝐧𝐨-𝐜𝐚𝐭 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐮𝐭.”
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
“give you everything you’ve been dreamin’ of”
═══════════════════════
another night, another session of training
with his spirit guardian, calythea.

helios perked up when he saw the sage-coloured lynx
sitting down elegantly, waiting for him.

“hi, calythea! what’re we doing today? will you teach me how
to fight? please, please! i’ll be so good tomorrow!”

calythea smiled slightly, but then mewed, “no, sorry.
we’re not doing that today. in fact, i..kind of need your help.”

woah. even the great forest spirit needed his help? “bring it
on!” helios chimed enthusiastically.

“what is it? is it important? I’ll help you, don’t worry!”

“perhaps you are…a little too young for this.”
calythea sighed glancing back at helios.

“no, no, it’s ok! I can do it for you, whatever it is!”
helios yowled desperately, hoping to prove to calythea
that he was up for the job.

the giant lynx chuckled.
“I’m glad I picked such an enthusiastic young cat
to mentor.”

helios swelled with pride. the pride in his heart was
like a flower, ready to unravel and bloom, making him
feel all warm and happy. this happened whenever
calythea praised him.

“thank you, thank you!! now, what’s the job?? TELL ME!!”
helios begged, jumping up and down around the dream forest
like a kitten once again.

he knew he should act mature and all to impress calythea,
but the excitement was too much.

“okay, okay. so I need you to help me find something.”

“oOOh! what, what, what? please tell me, calythea!!”
helios begged.

“alright, alright. so I had this…string that I lost
somewhere. i think it’s somewhere outside of camp.

so..would you mind if you could help me look for it?”

helios tilted his head for a moment, contemplating.

then, he perked up and mewed, “sure! but..what’s so
special about this string? isn’t it just ordinary?”

“oh, it’s special..in a way. I’ll show you when you
become older. for now, just take note that it’s sage green.
same colour as most of me.” she shook out her wings
to show helios.

suddenly a thought occured to him.

“wait! what if others find out?! they’ll think I’m crazy!”

“don’t worry. no cat will find out. and if they do…
I’ll help.”

“ok! I’ll try my best! just not today, okay? I’m very sleepy..”

“of course, little helios. don’t worry, I understand.”

═══════════════════════

[crexmii]

𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
“just let me in, ooh.”
═══════════════════════
"hey, petalpatch? is it okay if i go hunting on my
own today?"

petalpatch stared at him with a dubious expression on her face,
but then relented. "sure, you can go."

huh. i thought it would be harder than that. after all,
petalpatch is kind of strict.

just then, he thought he saw the form of calythea peeking
out behind the branches, watching him expectantly.

“thanks!” he called one last time, then he sprinted off into
the forest, in search of calythea’s “magic” string.

“so, where exactly do you think this magic string is?”
helios called out to the forest once he was far enough
from camp, expecting calythea to reply.

the wind rustled in sync to the spirit’s voice.
“well, I remember leaving it by an oak tree
somewhere. do you know what an oak looks like?
maybe you search for one! after all, this forest is
mostly willows, an oak should stand out from the
rest.

oh, but maybe check the thicker forest part.
there’s lots of oaks and alders there.”

yikes. search every tree for a string? or well, find an
oak tree in a massive forest?

helios sighed, but agreed. he promised calythea after all,
and a promise was not meant to be broken.

——————————

“have you found it yet?”
calythea inquired impatiently,
lashing her long spindly tail from side
to side.

helios continued digging through the foliage
under one of the forest’s oaks.

“nope, no sign of it.” he calmly replied.
he was used to calythea’s impatient demeanour.

helios had looked under every tree he could find,
so his white paws were now turning brown with mud,
soil and dirt from the forest floor.

"sorry, calythea, it's getting dark and i don't think
I'll be able to find it. besides, i've got to hunt so that
petalpatch doesn't get suspicious."
helios sighed apolgetically.

"oh well, i guess we'll just have to try another time."
calythea's voice echoed through the forest in disappointment.

helios winced. did she think it was his fault he couldn't find
her magic string or whatever?

helios numbly padded through the forest in search of prey as
the sun began to sink.

he didn't know why, but he felt a chilling sense of dread.

then something caught his eye.

it was a perfect little tendril, the colour of sage,
nestled between the roots of the largest oak in the
forest.

helios's heart lifted. "calythea, wait! i don't know if you're
still there, but is this it?"

he gently picked up the string with a paw and held it up just so
that the light of the setting sun shone down on it, making the
tendril shine.

"wait! that's it! i thank you, helios, for having such an
observant eye. i'll get it later, now that i know where it got
blown to. now, why not you relax and go catch some prey?"

calythea's voice sounded slightly more pleased.

helios's eyes shone with pride. he did it! and now,
he'd go catch the biggest thrush for softclan.

and the apprentice sprinted off in the direction of
the evening's prey.

═══════════════════════

[crexmii]

“ 𝐰𝐡𝐲 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐈 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮?!”
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
“there must be something in the cornflakes”
═══════════════════════
"nngh...calythea, what now? did you want me for
something?" helios groaned, eyes half-closed, still in the clutches
of sleep.

"wait. oops. sorry, calythea." his eyes widened and cleared,
focusing on the green figure in front of him.

"alright. are you ready or not?"

"eep! y..yes, sorry! i'm just really tired, but i'm ready!"
helios squeaked nervously. he fluffed up his fur, hoping
she wasn't mad.

"good. okay, i know i already asked for your help with the
string but I need it again. so, i'd love it if you could do another
favour for your own mentor, huh?"

but..i'm already so tired from yesterday. but..if i reject her,
won't she be hurt? helios thought, indecision taking up all
the space in his head, spiralling around in his mindspace.

hesitantly, he mewed, "o..okay. but..what do you want me to
do now?"

"well...i've trained you to fight, haven't I?"

"um..yeah, you have. why? are we gonna fight someone?
a bad guy?? will you make me a HERO?!"
helios's doubt had faded, giving way to excitement.

he jumped up and did a forepaw slash in the air,
hoping calythea was looking.

"good, good. well, this favour will involve fighting,
but i'm sure you'll win, dear."

helios inclined his head curiously. "okay! but can you
tell me who i'm gonna fight?"

calythea nodded and held out a frontpaw. she blew on it,
and a swirl of white mist appeared. soon, more wisps of mist
merged together to form an image of a cat.

"you're going to have to fight and kill this cat."

this mist started changing colour, and soon an image of a
black she-cat the colour of smoke was in front of helios.

wait a minute! i can't kill her!

"so, are you going to do it?" calythea glanced
back at the petrified form of helios.

"helios? my little sun? are you going to do it
or not?!" the goddess hissed sharply, raising her
voice.

helios stared back at calythea, frozen. but then the
words escaped his mouth :: "no! i can't! I'm not doing it!"

calythea, taken aback, stared at him incredulously.
then she purred. "oh, that's the wrong answer, i'm
afraid. tell me, why won't you do it?"

helios's neck fur had started to rise in fear, but he bravely
yowled, "because i know her, and I still love her!"

"really? you still love her? even after not seeing her
for so long? well, then if you won't do it, i'll just do it
myself." calythea said menacingly, raising her right
paw.

"wait! can I not kill her? just fight her and teach her a lesson?
just don't make me kill her, please." helios stammered, eyes of
flame fixed on the forest spirit looming over him.

"sorry, but i'm afraid I can't. aerienn has already written out your
fate, and this is a part of it. i can't change it, sadly."

"so, yes or NO?" suddenly, helios didn't know why, but
calythea's gaze seemed more threatening now.

"no! i don't care about my fate! i'll be normal, whatever!
𝐰𝐡𝐲 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐈 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐧𝐲𝐰𝐚𝐲?!"

little did the apprentice know with the seven words, he was
doomed.

------------------
calythea examined helios with disgust.

"i thought you were better than this, little sun god."

helios's heart felt like it was going to break.

"as i said, since you're so stubborn, i'll just have to do
this myself. i'm not sure if you know, but i can very much
control you if i want."

then, calythea lifted the sage string that helios found for her,
and then a thump and helios was thrust out of his body.

he was still in calythea's realm, but he was not himself.
he looked down at his translucent paws.

"calythea?! what did you do to me?!" he yelled in terror, staring
at his spirit guide.

"i'm merely going to take things into my own claws, since you're
too stubborn."

"but my body-"

the sight made him sick.

calythea had tied the string to his body, and was now making it
move like....he remembered a twoleg thing he saw once.

it was called a ... puppet.

just like a puppet. helios's body was walking in circles,
and fixing its eyes on him. or well, his spirit.

calythea's expression was unreadable, focused on controlling
the strings.

then she snapped the string back and helios fell back into his
own pelt.

"no! i don't care, i'll make sure you can't control me
any more!"

calythea barely reacted, merely glaring in annoyance
at him.

and the forest realm faded away.

-----------------
helios woke up feeling very horrible.
it felt like he was split into two, not just on
his pelt, but in his heart too.

he felt a huge wave of guilt washing over
him when he padded out of camp to train with
petalpatch.

i shouldn't have done that to calythea. this is
all my fault. i should have just said okay, then she
would have been proud and pleased with me!

it was only when they were practising battle
moves that the anger swallowed him.

whilst fighting, the rage buried within him from
the last night exploded.

"helios! woah, did you forget?! sheath your claws,
please!" petalpatch called to him, eyes filled with worry.

"oops, my bad. i must have gotten too carried away.
sorry." he mumbled.

petalpatch just brushed it off and mewed, "it's alright.
as long as you don't injure any cat. now, let's continue,
shall we?"

after training, the anger came gushing back through his
bloodstream.

how dare she take over my body! i'm my own cat! i'm not a puppet!
i'm not! i'm not her servant! i'm my own cat! i'm my own cat...

when the tired apprentice lay down in his moss bed, the only
dreams he had were dreams of darkness and emptiness, no
forests, no training, no calythea.

but he thought he saw the image of a sage green paw
flashing in his mind.

[crexmii]

“𝐠𝐥𝐨𝐰𝐩𝐚𝐰..𝐈’𝐦 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐝.”
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
“i just wanna be the comic relief”
═══════════════════════
cold.

he jolted his head back. I’m being watched.
no, you’re not. stop being such a paranoid mouse.

the pressure was too much for him. he had to tell some-cat.
but it wasn’t the reaction he was afraid of…
it was the consequences.

helios shivered and looked around at the sleeping
bodies of his clanmates.

they’ll all believe I’m crazy even if I
was brave enough to tell them…

wait. there was one cat who would trust him.

helios sprinted in the direction of the
medicine den.

oh, glowpaw…I hope you’ll be
able to help me…

————————

“ugh..helios, why’d you
wake me up? are you okay-
oh.”

glowpaw had awoken, startled,
to his panicked best friend.

he noticed helios shivering.
“are you sick? is that why
you seem so cold? look, you’re
shivering. just wait, I’ve got
some herbs.”

the plum tom shook his head
frantically and whisper-hissed, “can
we go somewhere away from..”

he flicked his tail in the direction
of sundrop — glowpaw’s mentor’s
sleeping form.

“what?! helios, are we doing something
forbidden? are you trying to get me to
sneak out of camp with you?!

listen, I know we’re friends, but-“

“no! it’s not that! I just need you
to go to the clearing so we don’t
wake any other cat up. the last thing
I need is anyone else thinking I’m crazy..”

glowpaw immediately put two and two
together, his mental gears turning.

“helios, are you trying to propose to me
or something?” the medicine cat apprentice
joked, expecting a flustered expression on
his friend’s face.

but what he got in return was..not comforting
at all.

——————

helios’s face darkened, and he sighed.
“glowpaw, I’m worried.
you really think this is
gonna be another joke?! I-
look, this is serious. I think I might
be in danger. please, I need someone
else to talk to..

so I’m sorry if it sounds farfetched,
and please don’t think I’m crazy..
actually it’s fine if you do, just don’t
tell anyone else. promise me, glowpaw.”

“I promise.”
helios could hear the uncertainty in
his friend’s voice.

“ready? alright. so it all began when—”

——————————

helios’s story made glowpaw’s
fur feel chilly. “but…calythea?!
the forest spirit that the whole clan
loves?!”

helios nodded slowly, worry glazing
his eyes. “you do believe me..do you?
or are you going to get mad because i
said it was calythea who did it. trust me—”

glowpaw put his front paw over helios’s mouth.

“ssh. I don’t need you to spiral into another
emotional speech. of course I believe you!
if I have magical healing powers, what’s stopping
spirits possessing you to be real?”

helios shuddered and glowpaw realised he maybe
said the wrong thing.

“oh. oops, sorry. I’m so sorry, that was
meant to be comforting!!” he stammered,
ruining the moment.

and helios started to burst into laughter.

——————-

“it’s alright! i get it.” helios giggled,
and he smiled for what seemed like the
first time in a long while.

“but..what are w- you going to do about
it?” glowpaw asked. “do you have a plan
or anything of the sort?”

oh. silly me. I’ve been too busy
worrying to think of a plan to escape
calythea.

“i..uh..” helios stammered sheepishly.
“don’t exactly have one yet?? YET.
i bet I’ll totally have a plan by tomorrow.
um..actually…you know what, I DON’T THINK
A PLAN IS REALLY THAT NECCESSARY RIGHT NOW!”

“wait, then how— you know what, never mind.
but thanks for telling me, helios. I’ll try
to help in any way possible.”

and maybe it was just those few words,
but they made helios’s heart feel a little
less heavy.

------------
it had been two days since helios
had last told glowpaw about calythea,
and the two friends had been brainstorming
on what to do ever since.

"sooo...what are
we gonna do now? oh, but
that shadow cat seems like
he'll help you." glowpaw suggested,
furrowing his eyebrows.

"wait! glowpaw! you're a
genius! i think i know what
we have to do...we'll have to
pay xeneth a visit." helios mumbled
and exclaimed, somehow at the same time.
he jumped up and started skipping around
in excitement. "i can't wait! he'll fix ALL MY
PROBLEMS! AND MAYBE EVEN MY STUPID PELT
COLOUR!"

"are you sure about this? is he even real?
what if he's evil too? HOW WILL WE FIND HIM?
HELIOS, WHAT IF YOU DIE DOING THIS?!
PLUS YOUR PELT COLOUR IS NOT STUPID!"
glowpaw blurted out all the worst-case
scenarios that he could think of.

helios froze in his tracks and stopped prancing
around in excitement, his smile fading.
"um....i don't know, maybe while i'm
dreaming? woah, if you die in a dream,
do you die in real life?"

glowpaw put on his very intelligent-looking
face, and proceeded to mew, "yes. it's your
spirit in the dreams, right? and with no spirit,
you don't have anything to move your body.
if you have no spirit, calythea takes over your
body. oh, and you die too.

AND then the world explodes and the plants
and the forest will take over the WORLD!!"

helios nudged glowpaw with a front paw.
"no, they won't, silly!" he mrrowed. "but
wait, yeah, you might be right about the
dying part. hmm....especially if i go
by myself...hmMM.."

glowpaw shushed his best friend and declared
loyally, "that's why i'm going with you."

-----------------
"glowpaw, you can't! this is my problem,
my destiny to stop calythea, and besides,
how are you even going to get into my dreams?"

"i have ways! plus, no, i don't think your destiny is
to die stopping her! i'm coming and you CAN'T STOP
ME! NYEHH!" the medicine cat apprentice protested,
his blue rosettes flashing even brighter in indignance.

helios put one paw to his forehead and sighed.
i knew this was gonna happen. but there's no
stopping glowpaw now...

"alright, fine, you can come. but with one rule.
strictly NO DYING on MY watch!"

"yippee!" glowpaw yowled in triumph, pouncing
on helios's back.

"for some reason, you don't act like a medicine cat
apprentice, what with your rowdy attitude around me."
helios joked, booping his friend's nose.

"ahem, i'm very quiet most of the time when i'm
not talking with you. haven't you SEEN me?? besides,
we're supposed to be talking about stopping calythea
and saving you, not useless things like this!!"

"okay, yeah. good point. now let's kick off calythea's
face!"

"yeah!"

"hey, would you two quit being SO LOUD back there?!"
it was petalpatch.

oh, well. before you save the world, you
have to save yourself from your mentor's wrath first.
both of them.

a/n :: oh yeah also this chapter is special!
there’s switching perspectives between the
two buddies because I think it gave it more depth.

and becuz I wanted to try something different.
I might actually make the next few chapters more
like this? idk yet

═══════════════════════

[crexmii]

𝐬𝐞𝐞𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐝𝐨𝐰𝐬
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
“i feel so funny these days, I’d rather sleep than stay awake.”
═══════════════════════
“helios, are you really, REALLY sure this is a good
idea? you sure you gotta go alone? shouldn’t i come with you,
in case calythea hurts you?”

helios purred, his mouth curving into a small smile. “it’s alright,
glowpaw. I think i can do this. but if I don’t come back for a while
or don’t wake up…it doesn’t mean I’m dead. my spirit might just be
stuck somewhere waiting, okay?” the tom mewed, trying not to show
how scared he was, or how much his voice almost kept on wavering,
or how he knew he might never see the clan again.

“I..I’ve got to go to the dream realm and find xeneth. I’ve
put this off for two moons already. it’s now or never, I’ve taken
too long.”

he knew the consequences. he could either end up dead
or stuck in a void with nobody to save him.

glowpaw seemed to sense his worry, because he simply sat down and
put a paw to helios’s forehead. “if you don’t come back, I’ll wait as
long as I have to.” he mewed fiercely.

then a horrible thought occured to helios.
“glowpaw. what…what if while my spirit is trapped
somewhere..calythea controls my body and…makes me
kill my mother? and…what if she makes me kill you?
and possibly…m..my clanmates?”

the young tom now was trembling, tears forming and pricking
the corners of his eyes, making glowpaw and the camp around him
all merge into one foggy blur.

“I won’t let her. if that happens..I could try and sense it, and then i’ll
hide your body somewhere where it’s really REALLY hard for her to
get out.” helios’s best friend declared loyally.

despite himself, helios mrrowed in amusement. “oh. it’s almost time
to sleep.” he sighed, glancing at glowpaw one last time.”

“good night, glowpaw. I’ll..hopefully…see you tomorrow. and I’ll
tell you ALL about what happened! bye for now.” helios whispered,
bumping heads with his buddy.

glowpaw smiled despite his worry. “bye for now, helios.”

———————————————
helios curled into his usual sleep position, taking in the sights
of the camp and the apprentice den for the last time before he
fell into dreams.

“night night, softclan.”
and he couldn’t resist it anymore. the blackness coming from the
corners of his eyes spread until all he could see was darkness.
and helios plunged into sleep.

he was nowhere. was this another dreamless sleep?
but the blackness surrounding him shifted into a different surrounding.
and it was one helios absolutely didn’t want to be in today.

oh no. he was in calythea’s forest.

—————————
helios warily looked around the clearing, eyes fixated on the shadows.
you never know what hides in them.

“ah, there you are. long time no see.” the voice crackled in
his ears. he knew it was her. but why couldn’t he see her anywhere?

“calythea! quit trying to control me! i’m a real cat, and i can’t be controlled!
so there!” helios growled, sticking out his tongue at the empty air. a sharp
tang of sage lingered somewhere in the air.

“oh, but I have you now, don’t i?”
helios felt sick. who knows, maybe if he threw up, he would be able to escape…
helios backed into the nearest bush and hid there, not moving for a very long time.

you really think hiding will help?

two gleaming emerald eyes stared at him through the undergrowth.
calythea was staring intensely at him, her eyes slitted, and she smirked once
she saw his look of terror.

shoot. he was discovered. he couldn’t escape. helios tensed with his claws
unsheathed, waiting for his chance to spring on the goddess.

and then something yanked him out of the forest.
helios felt like he was falling through a tunnel.
and he felt very cold.

he was back in the black void. or well, he thought so.
he couldn’t see anything other than himself and eerie blackness.

“you poor, poor apprentice. i hope now you no longer believe in
that garden snake’s lies.” a new voice sighed this time. it wasn’t echoing and
sly like calythea’s. in fact, it sounded more elegant and dignified.

“xeneth?! is that you! please, please save me!”

“oh, somebody remembers me. and it looks like i finally convinced you.
now, just wait a moment.”

———————————————————
helios immediately told xeneth everything.
it didn’t matter whether he was trustworthy or not, he just seriously
needed someone to tell other than glowpaw.

despite how he barely knew this other, older, deity, helios suddenly felt
like a great weight had been lifted off his chest.

“you poor thing,” xeneth mewed sympathetically for the fourth time or so,
casting a glance at helios. in this realm of pure darkness, the shadow lord’s
eyes were the only source of light allowing helios to see down here.

“do you know how to stop her? m…maybe you can help me?” the young one
stammered, fluffing up his plum and black fur. he knew xeneth meant no harm,
but his appearance was intimidating enough.

xeneth slowly turned to face helios. “are you sure? you do know that even if I
help you, you can still fall into her claws, right?” he said that slowly, so that
helios could hear his every word.

the young tom hesitated, uncertainty and doubt casting shadows in his eyes.
he looked down at his white paws and thought for a few moments. during those
moments, xeneth didn’t turn away impatiently. in fact, he just stood right there,
waiting patiently with a worried expression on his face.

“it’s alright. i think I‘ll be alright. but even….never mind. I’ll fight calythea
with you.” helios tried not to tremble too hard or let his voice waver. in fact,
he didn’t even feel as confident as he sounded. all the worst-case scenarios and
possibilities were playing over and over again in his head.

would he really take this risk? even if it resulted in never seeing the real world
again? and poor glowpaw and petalpatch…

but helios knew that if he didn’t do something now, calythea would get to
him eventually. and maybe…even seize control of him.

helios shuddered uneasily, almost forgetting that xeneth was sitting on his paws,
watching the apprentice doubt himself. helios came back to reality and jumped
when he saw the shadowy being eyeing him with his luminous irises.

“you’re sure you’re alright with this? and, hey, no fighting yet. only unless i-we
really have to.” xeneth mewed one final time.

helios nodded firmly. “I’m sure.” and this time, he meant it.

xeneth sighed and eyed him one last time.
then he meowed roughly, no longer bothering to keep up the
facade of elegance.

“we’ll confront her next moon.”

—————————————————————

helios’s heart was racing and beating so fast that he almost thought
the whole of softclan would hear it.

he had remembered. he was already anticipating the moment he would fall
asleep and wake face to face with the deity of his nightmares.

he had already told glowpaw about it. he said he would tell glowpaw everything
about it.

and it seemed like the day had passed too fast.
petalpatch had taken him to hunt and to practise battle moves, and it made
time fly by so fast.

and now it was already sundown. he had finished eating a whole starling earlier.
better to eat up when you’re about to confront an all powerful spiritual being.

helios talked with glowpaw a little bit more, and he didn’t realise the two had
been chatting for so long. the moment was slowly coming.

and he couldn’t prolong it anymore. the moon had already started to rise.
it was definitely time to sleep.

as helios touched noses with glowpaw for what he hoped wouldn’t be the last time.
he curled up in his moss bed, glanced at the moon for a final time, and let sleep take him.

—————————————————————

helios tensed up, ready to find himself in the forest realm.
instead, he ended up in the realm of night and shadow once again.
or maybe he was just not dreaming again.

but he had to double check.

“xeneth? are you..there? xeneth?!” helios called softly into the dark.
silence for a few minutes.

then his familiar voice growled.
“I’m here, child. and I..bring bad news. she’s expecting us.”

xeneth revealed himself, suddenly appearing right next to helios.
“aagh! oh.” he yelped, his chimera fur bristling.

xeneth twitched his whiskers in amusement, surprisingly, but his
expression turned grim once again.

“she found out through aerienn. that all-knowing piece of frog-spit.”
the shadowlord snarled. “knew she would ask them. how convenient it is to
be friends with someone who literally sees the future and watches over every single
thing.”

helios had never seen xeneth this angry. on the two occasions he had seen him, he seemed
either nervous and twitchy or elegant and calm. it was like he had two personalities, kind of.
but this was a whole new emotion he was seeing xeneth with.

the older spirit must have seen helios staring at him, for he glanced at the apprentice and
spat, “we’ve got to go anyway. don’t need em thinking we’re weak fools.”

helios slowly nodded. now he wasn’t thinking this was such a good idea.
but there was no talking himself out of it now. he had agreed. helios inhaled sharply and
began to slowly follow behind xeneth, his footsteps making no sound in the dream realm.

as if he could read his mind, xeneth suddenly purred, “we’ve got an advantage, young one.
she may know we’re coming, but she can’t hear us. so we’ve still got the element of surprise.”

helios felt a knot of tension in his heart unwind. thank caly— no, wait, thank xeneth(?) that there
was at least one thing they could do to attempt to catch calythea off guard.

“we’re here.” hissed xeneth’s voice. helios heard it, loud and clear, in one of his tufted ears.
it seemed as if he hadn’t been paying attention to his surroundings. helios observed that firstly,
they were hiding in a bush.

wait, calythea found me even when I hid in a bush the last time. is he sure this will work?!
helios felt the knot retie itself again, this time even tighter.

but xeneth was already creeping toward something. wait. there was calythea, licking her paws gingerly.
her sly expression was rather bored at the moment, but he could tell that the alert position she was in meant
that she was waiting. for us. helios thought with a chill. it ran all the way down his spine.

through the small gaps in the bush’s leaves, he thought that he saw another being appear next to calythea.
they were a very pale light blue, and their ears had the same pointy tufts that calythea had. siblings?
helios thought. he was cut off by the sound of xeneth softly growling. oh. that must be aerienn.
since they seemed to be stationary now, helios could get a (only slightly) better look of the other deity.

he saw two strange things hovering near their ears. they looked like the wings of a dove. then the distant figure
said something to calythea and spread their swan-like wings. the feathers were pure white, and so bright that helios couldn’t even look directly at them. and in the blink of an eye they were gone.

oh no, are they keeping watch too?! helios thought with a twinge of horror, his heart plummeting downward like a stone.

but the figure didn’t reappear again, and xeneth had started moving again.
helios also hadn’t realised that the sequence of bushes they were in had gotten them closer to calythea.
seeing her long tail right outside the bush made helios terrified. he didn’t even dare to breathe.

out of the corner of his eye, he could see xeneth’s pupils glowing. he didn’t know if he was imagining it, or whether they really had started shining brighter when the shadowlord was angry.

and then xeneth flicked his ear in helios’s direction, and he leaped out of the bush and sprang on calythea,
helios blindly following.

═══════════════════════

[crexmii]

“𝐲𝐨𝐮’𝐥𝐥 𝐛𝐞 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐬𝐨𝐨𝐧 𝐞𝐧𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡, 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐞.”
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
“and you’ll be safe under my control, just let me in.”
═══════════════════════
calythea yowled in surprise and fell, head zipping around to
see xeneth on her back, pinning her down. he may be
smaller than her, but he was still nimbler.

calythea let out a roar of fury and tried to whack xeneth off with her
tail, but he simply turned into a shadow and slipped underneath her,
then turned back into a cat once again, claws slicing one of her giant sage
wings.

tendrils of vines spilled out of the new wound xeneth had created,
covering the ground around her with vine and thorns.

calythea hissed menacingly, glaring at xeneth. then her gaze fell on helios.
he tried to run, but the forest spirit was too fast. she immediately pricked
her ears and lunged at him, pure fury written on her face.

——————————————————————————————

where was he? he was….nowhere.

“xeneth! where are you?!”
the fledgling let out a cry in vain. no-cat would hear him anyway.
helios sighed. everywhere, surrounding him was just darkness.
he stared down at his paws.

WAIT.

he examined his paws closely this time. he was…see-through.
no. somehow, he already knew where he was. it was not a place he
wanted to be.

he was in limbo.

a sudden yowl of pain. helios couldn’t see or hear where exactly
it came from, but he tried to run towards the source anyway.
he felt a sudden twinge of pain in his right front paw, but he
ignored it. too much was at stake.

he clawed at the blackness desperately. surprisingly, it started to melt
and the blackness faded away, revealing calythea’s forest. he saw xeneth
there, struggling against calythea fruitlessly. the lynx was much bigger than
him, and was pinning him down with her claws out.

helios felt sick. it would only be a matter of time before he would be
dead. (if spirits could die.) he wanted to save xeneth, but he was merely
a spirit, what could he do? the apprentice’s flame-coloured eyes fixed on
the sight of his limp body. wow. it just looked like a lifeless lump of fur.

helios glanced back at calythea pinning xeneth against a large oak tree.
his body was near her tail. he could easily scratch her wing from there.

the tom made a run and leaped for it, hoping to seize control of his body once
again.

——————————————————————————————

helios felt the familiar feeling of being in his own pelt once again, and he
saw xeneth stare desperately at him. the look he was making seemed like a
“quick! calythea’ll find out!” kind of look.

helios nodded and pounced on the giant lynx’s tail, claws digging into it.
calythea screeched and let go of xeneth in pain, who then darted underneath her
and slashed at her belly. she smacked her tail on the ground in pain. helios ducked
and rolled away before it could crush him.

the deities continued to fight, and calythea still hadn’t noticed helios regaining control of his body.

like a rhythm, the two slashed and scratched at each other.
xeneth was nimble and fast, dodging and darting out of the way of calythea’s claws.
but she was stronger and more muscular. she relied more on brute strength and…
what?! she was growing flowers!

she slammed her paw on the grass, and almost immediately, viridescent vines were
rising out of the grass. they glistened with thorns, and they snaked like living creatures towards
xeneth. helios got into position to charge at calythea, but xeneth jumped up a high tree branch
and scoffed, “you’re not the only one who’s in control here.”

with a flick of his tail, all the shadows of the forest came rising to life, merging to become one.
xeneth twitched his ear and the ball of shadow shaped into a large dragon. it stalked towards calythea,
destroying and trampling any vines in its path.

helios immediately leaped up a nearby tree to avoid the snaking plants.

calythea growled in warning as the shadow dragon lunged at her, attempting to bite her neck but missing.
she thumped her tail and summoned more vines, flowers of scarlet and carmine blooming on them. saffron and gamboge yellow pollen grains filled the air as the flowers produced more. they made helios’s eyes sting.
xeneth, however, seemed mostly unfazed. he flicked his tail once again and turned into a shadow, slicing at calythea’s flank. but the forest spirit had made a shield out of the vines, blocking xeneth’s vicious slashes.

helios blinked the last of the pollen from his eyes. he continued to watch the duel between the two gods.
and then in a flash, calythea was at xeneth’s neck, already poised to bite it. xeneth couldn’t get free this time.
he also noticed the shadow dragon had been trapped and held down by the vines, unable to get free.

helios knew he couldn’t watch xeneth die. then calythea would go after him next and….he couldn’t lose his
only hope. the tom bunched his muscles and jumped onto calythea’s back. just imagine you’re fighting a badger. he reassured himself, using the tactics that petalpatch had taught him when fighting an opponent larger than oneself.

he dug his claws as tight as he could into her back fur, trying hard not to fall off as she attempted to shake him
off like a gnat. the forest spirit let out an roar of pain and tried to twist her head around in vain. he held himself
onto her back for a little while before he positioned himself and leaped at her neck, claws unsheathed and gleaming, ready to strike.

he sunk his claws into the fur of calythea’s neck and scratched at it a few times, causing her to spiral into a state
of great fury. but surprisingly, the wound had started to heal itself, new fur already regrowing in the spot on her neck where helios had scratched her. he frantically tried to wound it again, but the same thing happened, healing on the spot.

he risked a glance back at calythea’s wing and saw that the wound xeneth made was still there. it was already starting to scab. her wings heal slower! I’ve got to get them!

helios tensed himself, ready to jump. he sprang at one of her outstretched wings, the sharp smell of forest herbs entering his nose. but mid-leap, calythea’s tail knocked helios off her and he tumbled to the ground, stunned and breathless. he lifted his head up and tried to see what happened to xeneth, but a claw lifted him up and his vision went black.
—————————————
a cooling sensation washed over helios, relaxing his muscles. he tried to open his eyes, but everything came out
blurry.

he thought he saw a black figure staring at him. “helios!”
helios jolted awake. “thank goodness you’re awake! i thought I lost you for a moment!” huh? that was…glowpaw’s voice.

he sat up and saw he was back in the warriors den. it was almost dawn, and glowpaw had been anxiously waiting for him.

i’m safe for another day! helios thought in relief, running up to glowpaw and pressing his nose in his friend’s fur.

you’re safe for now.
you’ll be mine soon enough, apprentice. you might already be, actually. heh.

a chill ran down his spine.
it was probably just the leaf-bare cold.
yeah. totally.


═══════════════════════

[crexmii]

𝐚 𝐟𝐥𝐞𝐝𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐧𝐨 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
“you’ll get older, and maybe then you’ll feel some control”
═══════════════════════
helios’s heart felt like it would burst out of his chest if it kept on beating like this.
he watched violetstar as she sat in the centre of the stone circle, his other clan members watching curiously.
he glanced at petalpatch and saw the look of pride on her face.

“today we gather here to announce the welcoming
of a new warrior. come, helios.”

helios carefully stepped towards violetstar, pressing down the excitement to squeal like a kit again.
“you have been trained well, little one. look how far you have come. petalpatch has taught you well. i call upon calythea, forest spirit, to deem this apprentice a warrior. he possesses the values of excellence, perseverance and determination. from now on, you will be a fully-fledged warrior of softclan. do you promise to take your duties seriously, and to protect your clan comes first?” the tortie asked, awaiting his response.

“i promise.” helios whispered. it had taken so much effort to not wince at the word “calythea.”
“then we proclaim you a warrior now! helios, you are an apprentice no longer. welcome.”

nothing could beat how proud he felt now, standing in the stone circle as this clanmates whispered, “welcome!”
the wind was filled with the melodious chants of the other warriors. he noticed glowpaw peeking out of the medicine den, eyes filled with pride. there wasn’t a hint of jealousy or resentment in them. helios winked back at him and looked around the clearing in wonder.

he wished this moment could have lasted forever.

———————————————

helios sat outside, stiff as a rock. he knew being a warrior was fun, but it was ALL SO BORING.
he sighed and slowly paced around the stone circle as softly as he could. he didn’t want to wake any cat up.
he gazed wistfully up at the pearly-white crescent hanging in the sky and the numerous shining stars dotting the night sky like a canvas.

it was a snowy night, and the forest floor was coated in white snow. it made his paws feel cold. but he didn’t mind.

it was all so peaceful. so tranquil…all so beautiful.
ah, but the peace was not to last, for his thoughts were interrupted by an echo.
i see. you’re not a warrior anymore, little sun.

helios jumped, bristling, and spun his head around. his eyes widened in horror. she was sitting there, tail and wings relaxed. his gaze focusing on her wing wound, he winced. trying not to let calythea smell his fear-scent, he let his fur settle back down into place. “why are you here?!” he whispered.

the lynx circled around him, which helios really did not like. it made him feel…very small.
“you know, you’re not a bad fighter. especially when you wounded me two moons ago.” she purred in satisfaction, snaking her tail around helios.

he gulped. why is she here?! is she here to kill me? when I just became a warrior?! oh, i regret everything so much. he instinctively braced himself, putting one paw in front of his face, as if he was waiting for calythea to kill him with one blow.

to his surprise, she merely laughed. “oh, calm down. you’re so paranoid sometimes. I’m not going to kill you, put your paw down. I’m here for something else.”

“w..what? i mean, WHAT?!” hissed helios, correcting himself to not stammer nervously in front of her.
don’t bother trying to pretend, you’re not intimidating at all.
this resulted in a war of emotions to start on helios’s chimera face.

he wanted to give her an injured look, but at the same time he was fighting back an “i totally agree with you look” and an “I’m sorry for everything” look.

“you’re very funny, did you know, helios? anyway. why I’m here. have you ever wondered why you almost drowned before you met me and I saved you?”

honestly, helios had never thought about that before. he’d always thought about how great clan-life was.
“not really…” his mental gears started to whir again, and suddenly the clik-clak of puzzle pieces fit together in his mind. he unsheathed his claws and scratched at the snow coating the greenleaf grass.

“you drowned me, didn’t you?! so you could earn my trust by ‘SAVING’ ME. HOW DARE YOU? I TRUSTED YOU?! XENETH IS SO MUCH BETTER THAN Y—”

“ssh. no yelling. don’t want to wake the whole clan up…do you now? and for goodness sake no, it’s not me. i just saved you. you know, I’ve tried to tell you a few times but you were too ignorant to understand. so now that I get you’ve matured, I’m sure you’ll listen, right?”

helios glared suspiciously at the green being right in front of him. “i can’t trust you. you’re really here to control me, aren’t you?”

but now that she mentioned it…
the memory of being submerged came to mind. all he remembered was that he was sinking, sinking, sinking. he couldn’t call for help. he couldn’t hear his siblings. he couldn’t breathe. everywhere was water. lakewater. water.
wasn’t there…someone who pushed him in? he felt it. the paw on his chest as he tried to float back up.
the shadow looking down at him as he was drowning. maybe she really was telling the truth.

“so, would you like to know the truth, helios?”

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[crexmii]

𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐭𝐡 𝐢𝐬 𝐜𝐫𝐮𝐞𝐥.
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
disappointment takes us by surprise..
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helios froze. what if she’s trying to manipulate me into becoming her puppet again?
but…i might need to know. i…i have to know.

helios snapped back to reality and saw calythea looking at him expectantly. say no. it’s a trick. say no! don’t!

“i…I’d like to know the truth.” he mewed, so softly that only calythea could hear it.
“if you’re sure.” she purred, lifting up a paw.

“i can’t believe it’s been so long and you still don’t know this, child.”
“I’m not a child! I’m a warrior now!” helios protested, stomping his foot into the cold snow. yeech. that’s cold.
“if you insist.” she shrugged. “you do know the one who almost sent you to your watery doom was none other than…” the forest spirit paused, as if she was expecting a reaction out of helios. either that or she was pausing for suspense.

“get on with it!” yowled helios, almost too loud. he heard glowpaw grunt and shift in his nest, so he tiptoed away from the medicine den and stayed near the centre of the stone circle. “get on with it. who did it? it can’t be that important, right?!” he hissed, softer this time. the last thing the clan needed to know was that he was conversing with calythea, and they didn’t need to know that he thought calythea, the goddess they worshipped was evil either.

“alright, fine, you impatient kit. the one who tried to drown you is none other than amarylis. sound familiar?” she mrrowed, whiskers slightly twitching. the words echoed through helios’s ears several times. amarylis. amarylis. amarylis.

the expression on his face…he knew calythea was watching him break down right now.
“no. no. it can’t be her! she was my mother! she cared for me! you’re trying to trick me!” he cried in rage,
his eyes slowly becoming more and more tear-soaked. soon, he couldn’t hold the tears in anymore. beads of salt rolled down the newly-made warrior’s cheeks, soaking his cheek fur.

“do you seriously find this funny? do you enjoy watching me suffer? is that all you wanted to do? make me unhappy?!” he demanded, more droplets spilling out.

“no, no, no!” calythea protested, holding up a paw in defense. “I simply want you to know the truth, my poor, misinformed, sun god. oh, helios.”

helios slowly lifted his head up to glare right into calythea’s eyes. “wait. how do I know you’re not lying?!” he growled. “I can’t trust you.”

“oh, you can. because i can show you exactly what happened that day.” she purred, making a shape in the air with her paws. before he knew it, a picture was starting to form in front of helios, right out of thin air.

“how—” he stopped as he saw what was going on. calythea was showing him a vision of the past.

she had brought him, coal, lychee and tansy to the lake. “where are we going, mommy?” he had asked. he was too innocent back then. beside him, his littermates were happily running around and bouncing beside their mother. “oh, helios, we’re going somewhere very special!” she cheerfully exclaimed. helios might not have known back then, when he was still a kit, but he could tell her voice, just everything about it made it clear that she was lying to them.

they had stopped by the lake. they wanted to learn how to swim. “I’ll teach you how to swim. first you go into the water, I’ll put you in, alright?” the four kits nodded. tansy went in first. she picked the light plum she-kit up by the scruff and dunked her in the water. and then she surfaced, and tansy was trying to swim to the surface. the other kits thought she was swimming. helios watched on in horror. he wanted to tear his eyes away — but he couldn’t. he needed to know what had happened.

she had done the same to the others, one by one. now it was helios’s turn. she did the same thing, except he managed to surface for air. amarylis hissed in annoyance and pushed him back down into the water letting him sink. he heard his other littermates’ muted cries and screams. he thought mother would help them. she was the one who would teach them how to swim, after all! he thought he heard his mother mew, “you were always the runt after all.”

his lungs ached. and sweet blackness enveloped him.

the vision had ended. helios felt shattered. he couldn’t stop himself, couldn’t change his face to hide how devastated he felt inside.

his heart ached instead of his lungs this time.
he didn’t bother saying anything or trying to argue with the spirit anymore.
helios didn’t want to believe it, but he knew what she had shown him was true. she hadn’t been lying. he just…knew.

and calythea disappeared, fading back into the trees.
leaving helios, alone. and the chimera sat down in the unending, milky snow, watching as more flakes fell down from the ether, coating the ground in a second layer of sleet. he didn’t care how cold it made his paws feel.
he didn’t care about the stinging and the freezing feeling all over him. helios refused to move. he sat as rigid as a rock.

all he did was think.
think about how the one he loved, he trusted, could be his murderer at the same time.



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