[ButterflyChaser]

I'm not sure if it is helpful. My linework is sloppy. Anyways I got some practice out of it, which is something I need to do.

Edited to make the original linework easier to see. I pretty much kept the forehead and where the snout meets the head the same.

More less I made the snout shorter, made the head bigger. (there needs to be considerable space between the ear and the snout.) Nearly always I tend to shade in the top of the snout, which is something I do, not necessarily helpful for anything.

[Kiare]

Looks really good o.o I love this. I like how you shade the snout it makes it look cool <3

[geinkotsu]

I think this is a somewhat helpful redline, although make sure you point out all the features that have been changed or added on your redline to the best of your own capability. The image you draw in a redline is basically just the visual tool, but text or even text visualized on the image itself can really help make those details click in someone else's mind and direct them to take notice to key features of the drawing.