by basil! » Fri May 26, 2023 12:40 pm
waves washed over the blue-and-purple ocean like gems shimmering down a slope. a red dim hung over them as the sun began to rise at the back of the sky.
"it's gonna be day soon. we better head back home," i said.
the figure in front of me gave no sign of replying as she continued forward, her feet sinking into the purple sand. her head was faced intently forward, as if the only focus she had was the horizon far ahead of us. it was a desolate place we were standing in. i had the impression she just didn't want to see my face.
"i'm serious. let's go back home."
the waves were starting to gather into foamy mounds and hills. they hissed as they slid up the bank, reminding me of hands slowly crawling upwards. the water would soon be eager to lick our feet.
i had stopped, staring at the water with fearful respect, but when i turned around her sillhoute was smaller against the dark sky. she was walking at the very same pace. her path was methodical and straight.
a feeling washed over me, the same shade as that painful ocean, that made me want to crawl out of my skin. it was disgust, i guessed, or maybe fear.
i didn't want to run, but i did. i knew she could hear my footsteps both when they stopped and when they approached her with their unsteady gait, but she just continued to look forward and walk without even a hitch of breath.
the waves were gathering now, swirling and roiling, and a faint streak of red ran through the glittering sea.
"we need to go," i said, not trying to hide the tremble in my voice. "i'm serious. we need to GO."
she took a step forward, her foot sinking into the sand as she raised her other leg. the purple rushed around her toes and into the spaces between them.
disgust-- now i was sure of it-- filled my chest, as well as hatred, as well as despair.
"what the hell is your issue!"
jesus christ, the waves; they were coming. the most recent one reached toward my foot, splashed an inch away from it, before receding to regroup. this minute defeat meant nothing; the ocean was hungry, and it would come.
and she kept walking.
"can you not even spare a minute to look at me?" i screamed. i had stopped and let my feet imprint into the sand below me even as the waves edged closer.
her step halted. my eyes burned.
she turned her head slowly, and the rising sun cast a glowing line of red onto one side of her face. it traced her cheekbones and hit one of her eyes. the stark shadows dipped under it.
her eyebrows were drawn together, but only slightly, and her mouth was a fine closed line. she was looking at me, one of her eyes cast into an amber that shone the way the ocean did. even then, there was something cold in them. the half of her cast in shadow seemed to draw its eyebrow in sorrowfully and pensively. the part in the light looked at me with a careful distance. she stared at the face i felt contort as that freezing color washed over me.
the first wave found my skin, crawled over it, soaked into it.
cold, pure cold. it was so purple as it ran up my veins. the wave receded and the second one seeped a little further, caught a little more. the ocean was hungry.
she was walking back home.
numbly, i followed her. blindly, i stumbled. as i scrabbled up a wave ran around my hands and distorted them.
she loved this ocean, didn't she? it matched whatever silent hell she had embodied.
or was this just an ocean?
the purple bled out of my vision and then ran back in. maybe it was just an ocean. maybe it was just cold. maybe she was just tired.
cold. i was cold.