snart's ramble journal

[wishbone!]

I will have washed my dog 4 times within the span of 3 days because somehow she keeps rolling around in something dead. I dn't wanna dry out her skin but how has she not concluded that her rolling around on a carcass leads to her getting bathed?

[wishbone!]

I'm still really not over Shinsou Hitsohi. I don't even watch BNHA anymore or keep up with the manga but this boy still has all of my heart.... he makes me so happy but then I get so sad because the Feels hit :^( no normal person, let alone an incredibly talented and motivated kid who got into one of the top schools in the nation, would ever find me to be desirable!
maybe if I spent less time fawning over fictional characters over the internet I'd be more productive with my life and therefore more likable. hm. what a tough conundrum that I've been ignoring for the past half of my life

anyway. these are the 9:30 thoughts of Monday, April 16

[wishbone!]

I want to cry but I can't

hey so what the HELL

[LovetheHoly]

*an angel wanders down to earth to answer your troubles*

Six pages good grief you write a lot

But listen, listen... i relate to 99.9988% of this and your literature is beautiful ok so pls write a book

Farewell
And for God's sake take that dog to a vet rolling around in dead things smh

(I found this and tried to be funny and supportive but Im actually terrible at it so I will delete this asap if you want me too)

[wishbone!]

hahahoooo back to posting on here! journaling is an important process that more people should consider, or reconsider if they haven't done it for a while. it's such a useful way to collect your thoughts and see what steps are necessary to take in life.

so, addressing my steps in life as of late, my life is crumbling all around me! not being dramatic at all. we're getting evicted, we have no real place to stay as of right now (it's my job to house hunt), I will be shot into independency with no driver's license (another thing that's being worked on right now), and be expected to take care of all the animals. all of that is happening within the span of a month.

but! it's all okay! I'm keeping it together and looking toward the future. I'm also in the process of getting an online oracle reading (I'd recommend zaporacle.com if you'd like some general life interpretation stuff) and it's meshing together pretty well. there's one card in particular, Shock, that is really speaking out to me right now. here are a few quotes that I deem very relevant to everyday existence:

"complexity often means fragility" & "change is the only constant"

I am a stone being shaped by always-moving water. Sometimes, I am the stream in which I exist. everything is relative to one another

[wishbone!]

phrases/lyrics that have stuck out to me recently

- and someday you'll see that all I want is to bleed
/ -- actual lyric: "all I want is to please" - song: On My Shoulders by The Dø
- bit heavy on the sevens
- tuft ghost / tuft blood isn't that... a cs dog
- little lord ragged
- blessed by the holy water that drips from her jaws
- living as a captive of the sun
/ -- song: Captive of the Sun by Parquet Courts
*** your family is your anchor but not your guide

[wishbone!]

thinking about things that
could be
and
have been
but most importantly ,,
before I head to bed I
eat my pitas and
suck my lEttuce
and then I think about

norman reedus and
his fantastically funky fetus

[wishbone!]

money means nothing to the soul. material wealth in this world means absolutely nothing. the emptiness someone feels in response to the mass-marketing of stuff can only be repaired by loving yourself and loving others.

think of it like this: there is a hole that has been hollowed out by sacrificing someone's own character. that hole is sometimes forcibly dug from the outside of the person's spirit. attempting to recreate wholeness through "filler" will not help, and may even increase the soul's rate of decay. emotionally fulfilling relationships and interpersonal connections act as fertile soil that will allow new, beautiful sprouts to blossom out of a hole created by the unattainable goal of More.

love yourself. love others. care deeply. that's all I got folks

[wishbone!]

I'M LITERALLY TEARING UP FROM THE NEW UPDATE..... MY BOY... MY SWEET PRECIOUS BOY IS BACK AND HE'S DOING BETTER THAN EVER I LOVE HIM SO GENUINELY AND WHOLEHEARTEDLY SOMEBODY PLEASE HOLD ME

I'VE NEVER DONE THIS BEFORE IN MY LIFE!!!!! NEVER ONCE HAVE I TEARED UP IN SUCH PURE JOY OVER A CHARCATER

I love shinsou. I want to wife him. baby baby baby baby DARLING PRECIOUS SWEETHEART OF MINE I LOVE YOU

this has been a public service announcement thank you and I Love Shinsou Hitoshi


20 minute update: I am still filled with an infinite fountain of joy for him. I love him. I love him. I love him. it's playing on repeat in my head and I know this is such awkward behavior but I just REALLY FROCKInG LOVE THIS KID OK????????? wanna support him... wanna cheer for him... wanna do a real long and convoluted happy dance to celebrate my unadulterated adoration for Shinsou Hitoshi!!!!!!!!!!

god I have to catch up on the manga because I just want to consume more and more of him. LIMITLESS HITOSHI

[wishbone!]

because I'm conscious and I care