-Emails-{Please read, you'll enjoy it no matter who you are}

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-Emails-{Please read, you'll enjoy it no matter who you are}

Postby Brooketail » Sat Dec 08, 2012 8:26 am

Hello.
I have a great-grandfather who I call Jaja.
He is a wonderful person. Smart, kind, funny... He sends me emails,some funny, some heartfelt, and some both.. I will post them here so that you can hear the wonderful stories he has heard and then passed on to me.




May you be blessed and read these stories, messages, and jokes.
And if you do not laugh or cry, even inside yourself at these then you have no heart.


~Brooketail



(please do not post on here, but if these stories touch you or make you laugh, pm me)
Last edited by Brooketail on Sat Dec 08, 2012 8:34 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Arlington Cemetary

Postby Brooketail » Sat Dec 08, 2012 8:29 am

> ----- Original Message -----
>
> Sent: Wednesday, August 11, 2010 4:19 PM
>
> Subject: Fw: Arlington Cemetery
>
>  
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>  
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> A GREAT ATTRIBUTE TO OUR FALLEN SERVICE PEOPLE.
>
>
>
>  
>
> Subject: Fw: The Jeopardy Question No One Could Answer - Unknown Soldier
>
>
> A reminder for all of us who may have forgotten......
>
>  
>
>
>
>
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>
>
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>
> ARLINGTON
> CEMETERY
> Jeopardy
> Question:
>
>
> On
> Jeopardy the other night, the final question was
> "How many steps does the guard take during his
> walk across the tomb of the Unknowns" ----
> All three contestants missed it! --
>
> This
> is really an awesome sight to watch if you've
> never had the chance.
> Very
> fascinating.
> Tomb
> of the Unknown Soldier
>
>
> 1.
> How many steps does the guard take during his
> walk across the tomb of the Unknowns
> and
> why?
>
> 21
> steps:
> It
> alludes to the twenty-one gun salute which
> is
> the
> highest honor given any military or foreign
> dignitary.
>
>
> 2.
> How long does he hesitate after his about face
> to begin his return
> walk and why?
>
> 21
> seconds for the same reason as answer number
> 1
>
>
> 3.
> Why are his gloves wet?
>
> His
> gloves are moistened to prevent his losing his
> grip on the rifle.
>
>
> 4.
> Does he carry his rifle on the same shoulder all
> the time
> and,if
> not, why not?
> He
> carries the rifle on the shoulder away from the
> tomb. After his march across the
> path,
> he
> executes an about face and moves the rifle to
> the outside shoulder.
>
>
>
> 5.
> How often are the guards changed?
> Guards
> are changed every thirty minutes,
> twenty-four hours a day, 365 days a
> year.
>
>
> 6.
> What are the physical traits of the guard
> limited to?
> For
> a person to apply for guard duty at the tomb, he
> must be between 5' 10' and 6' 2' tall and
> his waist size cannot exceed 30.  
>
> They must commit 2 years of life to guard the tomb,
> live in a barracks under the tomb, and cannot
> drink any alcohol on or off duty for the rest of
> their lives. They cannot swear in public for the
> rest of their lives and cannot disgrace the
> uniform or the tomb in any way.  
> After two years, the guard is given a wreath pin that
> is worn on their lapel signifying they
> served as guard of the tomb. There are only
> 400 presently worn. The guard must obey
> these rules for the rest of their lives or
> give up the wreath pin.  
>
> The shoes are specially made with very thick soles
> to keep the heat and cold from their feet..
> There are metal heel plates that extend to the top
> of the shoe in order to make the loud click as
> they come to a halt.
> There are no wrinkles, folds or lint on the uniform.. Guards
> dress for duty in front of a full-length mirror.
> The first six months of duty a guard cannot talk to anyone nor
> watch TV. All off duty time is spent studying the 175
> notable people laid to rest in Arlington   National   Cemetery
> . A guard must memorize who they are and where they are interred.
>  
> Among the notables are:
> President
> Taft,
> Joe
> Lewis {the boxer}
>
> Medal of Honor winner Audie L. Murphy, the most
> decorated soldier of WWII and of Hollywood fame.
>
> Every guard spends five hours a day getting his uniforms ready for
> guard duty..
>
> ETERNAL
> REST GRANT THEM O LORD AND LET PERPETUAL LIGHT
> SHINE UPON THEM.
>
> In 2003 as Hurricane Isabelle was approach ing Washington ,
> DC , our US Senate/House took 2 days off with anticipation of the storm. On the ABC
> evening news, it was reported that because of the dangers from the
> hurricane, the military members assigned the duty of guarding the Tomb
> of the Unknown Soldier were given permission to suspend the assignment.. They
> respectfully declined the offer, "No way, Sir!" Soaked to the skin,
> marching in the pelting rain of a tropical storm, they said that
> guarding the Tomb was not just an assignment, it was the highest honor
> that can be afforded to a serviceperson. The tomb has been patrolled
> continuously, 24/7, since 1930.
>
>
> God Bless and keep them. 
>
> I'd be very proud if this email reached as many as possible. We can be very
> proud of our young men and women in the service no matter where they serve.
> IN
> GOD WE TRUST
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Re: -Emails-{Please read, you'll enjoy it no matter who you

Postby Brooketail » Sat Dec 08, 2012 8:29 am

(please do not post on here, but if these stories touch you or make you laugh, pm me)
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God lives under the bed

Postby Brooketail » Sat Dec 08, 2012 8:50 am

Subject: Fw: GOD lives under the bed

GOD LIVES UNDER THE BED

 
I envy Kevin. My brother, Kevin, thinks God lives under his bed. At least that's what I heard him say one night.

 

 
He was praying out loud in his dark bedroom, and I stopped to listen, 'Are you there, God?' he said. 'Where are you? Oh, I see. Under the bed...'

 
  
I giggled softly and tiptoed off to my own room. Kevin's unique perspectives are often a source of amusement. But that night something else lingered long after the humor.  I realized for the first time the very different world Kevin lives in.
  

 
He was born 30 years ago, mentally disabled as a result of difficulties during labor. Apart from his size (he's 6-foot-2), there are few ways in which he is an adult.
  

 
He reasons and communicates with the capabilities of a 7-year-old, and he always will. He will probably always believe that God lives under his bed, that Santa Claus is the one who fills the space under our tree every Christmas and that airplanes stay up in the sky because angels carry them.

 

 
I remember wondering if Kevin realizes he is different. Is he ever dissatisfied with his monotonous life?

 

 
Up before dawn each day, off to work at a workshop for the disabled, home to walk our cocker spaniel, return to eat his favorite macaroni-and-cheese for dinner, and later to bed.
  

 
The only variation in the entire scheme is laundry, when he hovers excitedly over the washing machine like a mother with her newborn child.
  

 
He does not seem dissatisfied.

 

 
He lopes out to the bus every morning at 7:05, eager for a day of simple work.

 

 
He wrings his hands excitedly while the water boils on the stove before dinner, and he stays up late twice a week to gather our dirty laundry for his next day's laundry chores.

 

 

 
And Saturdays - oh, the bliss of Saturdays! That's the day my Dad takes Kevin to the airport to have a soft drink, watch the planes land, and speculate loudly on the destination of each passenger inside. 'That one's goin' to Chi-car-go! ' Kevin shouts as he claps his hands.
  

 
His anticipation is so great he can hardly sleep on Friday nights.
  

 
And so goes his world of daily rituals and weekend field trips.

 
  
He doesn't know what it means to be discontent.
  

 
His life is simple.
  

 
He will never know the entanglements of wealth of power, and he does not care what brand of clothing he wears or what kind of food he eats. His needs have always been met, and he never worries that one day they may not be.

 

 

 
His hands are diligent.. Kevin is never so happy as when he is working. When he unloads the dishwasher or vacuums the carpet, his heart is completely in it.

 

 
He does not shrink from a job when it is begun, and he does not leave a job until it is finished. But when his tasks are done, Kevin knows how to relax.

 

 
He is not obsessed with his work or the work of others. His heart is pure.

 

 

 
He still believes everyone tells the truth, promises must be kept, and when you are wrong, you apologize instead of argue.

 

 
Free from pride and unconcerned with appearances, Kevin is not afraid to cry when he is hurt, angry or sorry. He is always transparent, always sincere. And he trusts God.

 

 
Not confined by intellectual reasoning, when he comes to Christ, he comes as a child. Kevin seems to know God - to really be friends with Him in a way that is difficult for an 'educated' person to grasp. God seems like his closest companion.

 

 
In my moments of doubt and frustrations with my Christianity, I envy the security Kevin has in his simple faith.

 

 
It is then that I am most willing to admit that he has some divine knowledge that rises above my mortal questions.

 

 
It is then I realize that perhaps he is not the one with the handicap. I am. My obligations, my fear, my pride, my circumstances - they all become disabilities when I do not trust them to God's care.

 

 

 
Who knows if Kevin comprehends things I can never learn? After all, he has spent his whole life in that kind of innocence, praying after dark and soaking up the goodness and love of God.

 

 
And one day, when the mysteries of heaven are opened, and we are all amazed at how close God really is to our hearts, I'll realize that God heard the simple prayers of a boy who believed that God lived under his bed.

 

 
Kevin won't be surprised at all!

 

 
When you receive this, say a prayer. That's all you have to do. There is nothing attached. This is powerful.

 

 
Just send this to other people and do not break this, please. Prayer is one of the best free gifts we receive.. There is no cost, but a lot of rewards.

 

 
FRIENDS ARE ANGELS WHO LIFT US TO OUR FEET WHEN OUR WINGS HAVE TROUBLE REMEMBERING HOW TO FLY
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Re: -Emails-{Please read, you'll enjoy it no matter who you

Postby Brooketail » Sat Dec 08, 2012 9:35 am

Subject: Fw: the gold box





A young man learns
what's most important in life from the guy next door.




It had been some
time since Jack had seen the old man. College, girls, career, and life itself got
in the way. In fact, Jack moved clear across the country in pursuit of his dreams.

There, in the rush
of his busy life, Jack had little time to think about the past and often no time
to spend with his wife and son. He was working on his future, and nothing could
stop him.

Over the phone,
his mother told him, "Mr. Belser died last night The funeral is Wednesday." Memories
flashed through his mind like an old newsreel as he sat quietly remembering his
childhood days.

"Jack, did you
hear me?"

"Oh, sorry, Mom.
Yes, I heard you. It's been so long since I thought of him. I'm sorry, but I honestly
thought he died years ago," Jack said.

"Well, he didn't
forget you. Every time I saw him he'd ask how you were doing. He'd reminisce about
the many days you spent over 'his side of the fence' as he put it," Mom told him.

"I loved that old
house he lived in," Jack said.

"You know, Jack,
after your father died, Mr. Belser stepped in to make sure you had a man's influence
in your life," she said

"He's the one who
taught me carpentry," he said. "I wouldn't be in this business if it weren't for
him. He spent a lot of time teaching me things he thought were important...Mom,
I'll be there for the funeral," Jack said.

As busy as he was,
he kept his word. Jack caught the next flight to his hometown. Mr. Belser's funeral
was small and uneventful He had no children of his own, and most of his relatives
had passed away.

The night before
he had to return home, Jack and his Mom stopped by to see the old house next
door one more time.

Standing in the
doorway, Jack paused for a moment. It was like crossing over into another dimension,
a leap through space and time The house was exactly as he remembered. Every step
held memories. Every picture, every piece of furniture....Jack stopped suddenly.

"What's wrong,
Jack?" his Mom asked..

"The box is gone,"
he said

"What box?" Mom
asked.

"There was a small
gold box that he kept locked on top of his desk I must have asked him a thousand
times what was inside. All he'd ever tell me was 'the thing I value most,'" Jack
said.
It was gone. Everything
about the house was exactly how Jack remembered it, except for the box.. He figured
someone from the Belser family had taken it.

"Now I'll never
know what was so valuable to him," Jack said. "I better get some sleep. I have an
early flight home, Mom."

It had been about
two weeks since Mr. Belser died Returning home from work one day Jack discovered
a note in his mailbox. "Signature required on a package. No one at home. Please
stop by the main post office within the next three days," the note read.
Early the next
day Jack retrieved the package. The small box was old and looked like it had been
mailed a hundred years ago. The handwriting was difficult to read, but the return
address caught his attention. "Mr. Harold Belser" it read. Jack took the box out
to his car and ripped open the package. There inside was the gold box and an envelope.
Jack's hands shook as he read the note inside.

"Upon my death,
please forward this box and its contents to Jack Bennett. It's the thing I
valued most in my life." A small key was taped to the letter. His heart racing,
as tears filling his eyes, Jack carefully unlocked the box. There inside he found
a beautiful gold pocket watch.

Running his fingers
slowly over the finely etched casing, he unlatched the cover. Inside he found these
words engraved:

"Jack, Thanks for
your time! -Harold Belser."

"The thing he valued
most was...my time"

Jack held the watch
for a few minutes, then called his office and cleared his appointments for the next
two days. "Why?" Janet, his assistant asked.

"I need some time
to spend with my son," he said.

"Oh, by the way,
Janet, thanks for your time!"

"Life is not measured
by the number of breaths we take but by the moments that take our breath away,"


Think about this. You may not realize it, but
it's 100% true.


1. At least 2 people
in this world love you so much they would die for you.


2. At least 15 people
in this world love you in some way.


3. A smile from you
can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don't like you.


4. Every night, SOMEONE
thinks about you before they go to sleep.


5. You mean the world
to someone.


6. If not for you, someone
may not be living.


7. You are special and
unique.


8. When you think you
have no chance of getting what you want, you probably won't get it, but if you trust
God to do what's best, and wait on His time, sooner or later, you will get it or
something better.


9. When you make the
biggest mistake ever, something good can still come from it.


10. When you think the
world has turned its back on you, take a look: you most likely turned your back
on the world.


11. Someone that you
don't even know exists loves you.


12. Always remember the
compliments you received. Forget about the rude remarks.


13. Always tell
someone how you feel about them; you will feel much better when they know and you'll
both be happy.


14. If you have a great
friend, take the time to let them know that they are great.


Send this letter
to all the people you care about, if you do so, you will certainly brighten someone's
day and might change their perspective on life...for the better.


To everyone I sent
this to
" Thanks for your
time".
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Re: -Emails-{Please read, you'll enjoy it no matter who you

Postby Brooketail » Thu Jan 10, 2013 12:23 pm

40 years
of marriage..


A married couple in their early 60s are celebrating their
40th wedding anniversary in a quiet, romantic
little restaurant.

Suddenly, a tiny yet beautiful fairy appeared on their table.
 
She said, 'For being such an exemplary married
couple and for being loving to each other for
all this time, I will grant you each a wish.'

The wife answered, 'Oh, I want to travel around the world
with my darling husband.'

The fairy waved her magic wand and - poof! - two
tickets for the Queen Mary II appeared in her
hands.

The husband thought for a moment:
'Well, this is all very romantic, but an
opportunity like this will never come again. I'm
sorry my love, but my wish is to have a wife 30
years younger than me.'

The wife, and the fairy, were deeply disappointed,
but a wish is a wish.!

So the fairy waved her magic wand and
poof!...
 
The husband became 92 years old.

The moral of this story:
Men who are ungrateful bastards should
remember fairies are female.....



SEND THIS
TO A WOMAN WHO NEEDS
A GOOD LAUGH .
AND TO ANY
MAN WHO CAN
HANDLE IT!
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Re: -Emails-{Please read, you'll enjoy it no matter who you

Postby Brooketail » Thu Jan 10, 2013 12:34 pm

No nursing home for us.  We'll be checking into a Holiday Inn!

With the average cost for a nursing home care costing $188.00 per day, there is a better way when we get old and too feeble.
I've already checked on reservations at the Holiday Inn.
 For a combined long term stay discount and senior discount, it's $59.23 per night.
Breakfast is included, and some have happy hours in the afternoon.
That leaves  $128.77 a day for lunch and dinner in any restaurant we want, or room service, laundry, gratuities and special TV movies.
Plus, they provide a spa, swimming pool, a workout room, a lounge and washer-dryer, etc.
Most have free toothpaste and razors, and all have free shampoo and soap.
$5 worth of tips a day you'll have the entire staff scrambling to help you.
They treat you like a customer, not a patient.
There's a city bus stop out front, and seniors ride free.
The handicap bus will also pick you up (if you fake a decent limp).
To meet other nice people, call a church bus on Sundays.
 For a change of scenery, take the airport shuttle bus and eat at one of the nice restaurants there. 
While you're at the airport, fly somewhere.  Otherwise, the cash keeps building up.

It takes months to get into decent nursing homes. Holiday Inn will take your reservation today.
And you're not stuck in one place forever -- you can move from Inn to Inn, or even from city to city.
Want to see  Hawaii?  They have Holiday Inn there too.
TV broken?  Light bulbs need changing?  Need a mattress replaced?  No problem.. They fix everything,  and apologize for the inconvenience.

The Inn has a night security person and daily room service. The maid checks to see if you are ok.  If not, they'll call an ambulance . . . or the undertaker.
 If you fall and break a hip, Medicare will pay for the hip, and Holiday Inn will upgrade you to a suite for the rest of your life.     

                         And no worries about visits from family. They will always be glad to find you, and probably check in for a few days mini-vacation.

 The grandkids can use the pool.
        What more could I ask for?

So, when I reach that golden age, I'll face it with a grin.

AIDS WARNING!

   To all of  you approaching 50 or have REACHED 50 and past,  this  email is especially for you......
SENIOR  CITIZENS  
ARE THE NATION'S LEADING CARRIERS OF AIDS!

HEARING  AIDS 

BAND AIDS 

ROLL  AIDS 

WALKING AIDS  

MEDICAL AIDS 

GOVERNMENT  AIDS 

MOST OF ALL,  

MONETARY  AID TO THEIR KIDS!

Not  forgetting HIV
(Hair is Vanishing)



I'm  only sending this to my 'old' friends.   
I love to see you smile.
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