a place to put my writing and old stories.

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Has my writing improved?

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Re: a place to put my writing and old stories.

Postby ~Teya~ » Wed Feb 28, 2018 6:18 pm

    STORY OPENING

    The door opens slowly, scraping against the floor as the foul odor of cigar smoke hits the viscet’s senses. Older viscets sitting around multiple poker tables in the musty room turn to see who has entered; she holds her breath, pausing for a moment, soon regaining her composure and striding towards the front desk straight ahead.
    A paw slams against the worn surface of the desk, holding a small stack of cash. The viscet positioned behind it raised his head from the strewn papers beside him, fixing his gaze on to the culprit.
    “It’s all there.” she remarks in the most confident tone she can muster, watching as the male takes the money from her.
    Silence fills the room, he counts the money slowly, as if purposefully to prolong the female’s anxiety.
    “There is only eight hundred here.” he responded, eying her suspiciously.
    “It’s all I could get.” rubbing the back of her neck, she carefully avoided making eye contact with the dishevelled looking viscet as he peered at her back. “Not good enough, missy,” he finally says, slipping the cash into a nearby drewer. “Hey! Then don’t I get my money back?” she exclaimed in protest. He raised an eyebrow, as if offended by the notion, “not necessarily.” he said with a sneer, revealing his mustard yellow teeth. She bit her lip, trying to hold back her growing impatience, “please sir, I need that money--”
    “What’s the dough for, anyhow?” turning her head, her gaze landed on a sleek, gray viscet leaning on the wall closest to her. She mind as well tell him, he appeared harmless enough. “I’m looking for someone to guide me up to the Igasho mountains,”
    “Now why would a lass like you want to go there? It’s dangerous, y’know.”
    “It’s none of your business,” she found herself quickly respond, turning back to the male behind the desk. “Kindly give me back what is mine.” she demanded, failing to mask her frustration now.
    “I can take you to Igasho,” the gray viscet persisted, walking over to her and holding out his hand to the one behind the desk. She watched in awe as the viscet hesitated, giving him a dirty stare but proceeded to hand him her money. “How did you . . . ?” her voice stammered as he smiled down at her. “Don’t worry your pretty little head about it; follow me.” she obliged, accompanying him through the door of the building and outside.
    “Wait here,” he ordered, walking away and approaching another viscet close by but out of earshot.
    She shuttered; watching her warm breath evaporate into the cold city air, the sun was not yet out due to it being so early in the morning, plus, she was in an alleyway, so that didn’t help matters. Watching the two viscets talk, she attempted to make out what they were saying. “What am I doing?” she murmured nervously, her breathing becoming shaky. “Kajika probably isn’t even real.”
    Turning her head slightly, she glanced back at her vibrant colored wings, spreading them out wide and wrapping the feathers so that they closed around her arms and chest in an attempt to stay warm.
    “Time to go!” the gray male announced with a bright smile as he trotted back over to her. “Already?” she asked with a puzzled expression, only to have him motion her to follow.

    * * *
    A low humming of the truck’s engine helped calm her nerves as she sat in the backseat with the gray, they had been driving through the city of Treali and would soon be heading up the road leading to the mountains of Igasho, with little to no conversation.
    “I just realized something,” the gray remarked, breaking the silence. “I never asked for your name, although, I’m sure it won’t be able to match your remarkable markings.” she blushed, looking away from his eyes. “Thank you; I guess I’m just so used to them it’s hard to realize how different others think they look.” she responded with a small laugh, stealing a glance at her purple and sky blue paws. “Harmosa is my name, Harmosa Armonía.”
    “I think it fits,” he replied, then added after a small pause, “the names Quincy, you can call me Quince if you’d like.” Harmosa smiled, looking out the window as they turned onto the paved road away from the city.
    “There is just one thing I don’t quite get, Harmosa,” Quincy began, causing her to turn back towards him. “You have wings, something I’ve never seen before, why don’t you just fly to Igasho?” he asked in a genuinely curious tone. She laughed, saying, “well, even if I did manage to fly twenty miles there, I wouldn’t be able to carry much, or know where to go from there.” he shrugged, “I suppose you’re right; the Igasho mountains are very vast afterall.”
    “What did your parents think of you going off like this?” he questioned with a smirk, crossing his arms. “Uhm . . .” hesitating, her eyes shifted from place to place awkwardly. Quincy’s smirk grew bigger, “little rebel running off without telling the parents, eh?”
    Quincy seemed to ponder something for a moment, before adding, “just tell me one thing: Why do you want to go in the first place?” Harmosa felt like she owed him at least that much, what could be the harm in it? Except him thinking she’s a crazy broad of course. Taking a deep breath, she looked back towards the Igasho mountains as they began to grow closer. “I want to know if Kajika is real.”
    She could hear Quincy stiffen in his seat, and even the driver’s ears pinned back. “I’ve heard about Kajika,” Quincy said in a reserved voice, continuing. “He is said to move without sound; his blood colored, featherless wings assure maximum stealth when going in for an attack.” he now turned his head towards the mountains as well, “not to mention he has a greasy mane full of fleas and teeth so long they hang out of his mouth.”
    Harmosa sighed, “I just . . .” her voice trailed off as she started playing with her fingers. “It’s so hard to explain.” the viscets, and even the vehicle they sat in seemed to turn into a sudden quietness as they continued down the road.
    “Try me,” he urged, looking back towards her. Harmosa returned his gaze, resting her head on one of her paws. “Knowing that others are out there, like me . . . it would just, mean so much to me.” she responded in almost a murmur, Quincy nodded, his eyes falling away from hers.

    * * *

    Towering mountains with their highest points covered with snow from the previous winter along with a beautiful array of trees and vivid wildflowers were now filling Harmosa’s eyes with their nearly sinful splendor. The road had gotten increasingly more rough with the last few hours, causing the truck’s going to be slow. But she didn’t mind, she had never in her entire life seen such a view. She was used to the city, full of fast moving cars and so many other viscets it was impossible to hear even your own thoughts, rarely venturing away from that life. But this, this made her want to stay here, regardless of Kajika’s existence, living out her days in bliss.
    The truck slowed to a stop at a small clearing, where all three viscets got out of the vehicle.
    “Nice, isn’t it?” Quincy asked smugly, causing her to whirl in his direction with a joyful grin. “Nice? Is that all you have to say about it?” she responded playfully, stretching her wings out to their full length after the long ride.
    “It’s getting dark; Joe, make the lady a fire.” Quincy said with a wink, the viscet, Joe, who had drove them all the way up here nodded, walking off to presumably find firewood. Harmosa watched as he disappeared into the forest, “Joe doesn’t talk much, does he.” she remarked, flapping her wings a bit. “Nope,” Quincy commented back a tad stiff, surveying their surroundings with a keen eye.
    Eventually, Joe came back close to dark with a large handful of firewood, and before she knew it a lively fire had been started. If took a little longer than she thought it would for him to come back, but she guessed it was just hard to find dry wood.
    “So, Harmosa, where do you think we’ll find Kajika?” Quincy inquired, the illumination of fire dancing off his coat and around him. “Well, I thought you might have some idea,” she began, laughing a little. It sounded so absurd; being here, doing this. “You’ll need all the help you can get,” he said with a smirk, “Kajika is known to steal sheep around here, and children.” Harmosa looked into the fire, rubbing her paws together. “It’s all rumours and speculation, no one knows if they did any of those horrible things.” she responded, taking a long breath in.
    “Is that what others would say, when viscets talked about your parents?” Quincy suddenly remarked in a completely stone cold tone.
    “What?” Harmosa responded, her eyes widening, taken aback.
    He ignored her, glancing off to her side and making some sort of paw gesture. Before she could look back, two large paws gripped the back of her shoulders firmly, she hastily began to flap her powerful wings to loosen their hold, only for another viscet to come help pin her down.
    An ear piercing scream echoed through the valley as they put a peculiar “thing” on her wings, somehow attaching each wing to her hind legs, making it extremely painful to move them.
    “Why are you doing this?!” she exclaimed angrily, snapping at the nearest viscet that held her down, just as a needle was jabbed into the side of her neck.
    “Nothing personal lass; purely business. You’re quite the prize, y’know.” Quincy responded cooly with a disinterested look on his face. Her eyes began to close and her muscles weakened, but she refused to give up.
    There was a sudden thud to the side of her, Quincy turned swiftly, his claws unsheathed. A loud crash sounded a moment later as one of the viscets holding her down went flying through the air. Quincy took one look at the viscet now on the ground, and hurriedly ran in the opposite direction.
    Harmosa could just barely force her eyelids open, hearing the yells and blood curdling screams of viscets around her, managing to steal a glance at the fire close by. She blinked, not trusting what her eyes showed her.
    He stared at her from the other side of the blaze; all she could focus on were his deep, blood red eyes and and gigantic wings, a commanding growl reverberated from his throat as her mind slipped entirely from consciousness.


--
Putting this here to mess around a bit / so peeps can read it. I'll link to the whole story once it's finished!
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Re: a place to put my writing and old stories.

Postby ~Teya~ » Thu Mar 01, 2018 7:33 pm

    CHAPTER ONE

    Same day, morning.

    He awoke to the soothing hum of birds singing in the distance, his ears twitched, opening his eyes. Yawning, Hok’ee rose from the dimly lit cave in which he lived, strolling to the light of the exit. It took a moment for his eyes to adjust when the warm rays of the sun abruptly hit his face from the rock perch he now stood upon.
    Taking a deep breath in, he extended his wings wide. ‘Another day, another challenge.’ Hok’ee thought to himself as he leapt from the stone, his speed increasing with every second, diving straight down from his home atop the mountain. Just in time, he released his wings that lay flat against his body to make a bullet shape, now opening them up to slow him down as he began soaring close to the forest floor, scouting the area.
    Keeping his ears open for disturbance, Hok’ee observed the life below. A group of pale yellow deer frolocked gracefully away from him as he past, making their way back to the safety of the thick shrubbery.
    For awhile he glided across the sweeping canyons and wide-reaching mountains with ease, simply watching for anything out of the ordinary. Once closer to the outer edges of Igasho, however, he made sure to stay up high in the puffy white clouds, noting the scattered farms within the flater sections of valley.
    ‘Much closer, and something will have to be done about those.’ he thought with annoyance, growling lowly. “Brutes,” he spat, proceeding to lift his left wings drastically upwards while simultaneously lowering his rights wings to abruptly veer back the way he had come.

    * * *

    The stars glistened above Hok’ee as he gazed up at them, there was something special about these stars tonight; there were no clouds to block them, and they shone so brilliantly even he was in awe of them, despite the fact that Hok’ee watched the stars every night, ever since he was a boy, with Makya -- until . . .
    He shook the nasty thoughts that suddenly plummeted to the surface of his mind; choosing instead to admire the view.
    Laying his head against the ground as it grew heavy and shutting his eyes, Hok’ee felt the wind blowing peacefully through his fur, starting to fall asleep.
    A faint shriek could be heard as he abruptly raised his head, fully alert within seconds. Glancing all around to see if he could find the source, he saw nothing.
    ‘Why should I care? It was just a bird.’ Hok’ee pondered with a snort. ‘But, what if . . .’ his mind kept urging him. “Urgh,” the viscet muttered, coming into a stand and soaring off into the night. ‘Mind as well make sure.’ making his way past a bend, he saw a light from affair; a fire. He drew in a breath, frozen in the air.
    Shaking his head and regaining his self-control, he went plunging towards the light with a renewed sense of purpose. ‘No one goes this far into my mountains!’ he thought angrily, landing near the fire with a loud thump, just out of view of the viscets around the fire. In an instant, he locked onto his first victim. A viscet who looked to be crouching close to the ground with his back facing him. With a swift movement of his wings he was in flight once more. Flying straight into the viscet, they hurtled in to the nearby ground. Now he fixed his attention on the rest of the viscets around the fire, fiercely whirling his wings up into the air and flying just barely above their heads to scare them; they all yelped and screamed as he swatted at their heads, purposely missing. Within seconds all of the viscets had cleared out away from the fire and zoomed away in their precious vehicle.
    Going over to the fire once more, he noticed something; another viscet just laying there, probably hiding. ‘When will they ever learn?’ he thought, irritated, growling at them. But they just, stared at him, and then closed their eyes. Confused by this, Hok’ee inched a little closer, to the side of the fire where they were.
    ‘This . . . can’t be,’ he thought in a daze, his breathing becoming uneven. Swallowing hard, he nosed the feathery mass that attached to this extremely colorful viscet’s body. “Wings,” was all he could manage.
    The other viscets had put something on her wings, some sort of metal “pin” like object that dug into the wing and hind leg flesh. He winced at the thought, having to ignore that for now, he had to get this viscet out of here, he couldn’t just, leave her, could he?
    No.
    First putting out the fire, Hok’ee, gently as possible laid them onto his back, barely managing to lift off into the air.

    * * *

    Hok’ee stared intently at this new viscet now inside his cave, wondering what to do next. If he tried to remove the objects from their wings, they’d wake up screaming, and he definitely didn’t want that.
    It was strangely eerie being so close to a viscet again after staying away from them for so long, he didn’t know what to think. On one paw, it felt invigorating at just the thought of talking with someone again, but on the other paw, it scared him. A lot.
    The viscet stirred, resulting in Hok’ee becoming motionless, making sure to be as quiet as possible. The female slowly sat up, scanning their surroundings.
    The moon illuminated the part of cave where they sat, their markings shining in the moonlight. But its light didn’t reach Hok’ee, who purposely stayed in the shadows.
    Turning towards Hok’ee, the gleaming viscet sucked in a breath, backing away slowly. He wasn’t quite sure how to react; should he speak? Now that he really thought about it, he almost never spoke, for ten years, he had been mostly silent. They continued backing away, coming close to the exit. And he knew for a fact they couldn’t fly away; they were like a fly in a spiderweb, stuck. Deciding to walk in their direction, they muttered something along the lines of “I am not dying today,” in a shaky voice. For whatever reason, he let out a laugh. They just stared at him, mystified.
    “What are you laughing at, do you always taunt your meals?!” they abruptly exclaimed with a small squeak. Hok’ee tilted his head, breaking into another uncontrollable laugh, “eat you?” he asked, getting a grasp on his sudden emotions.
    “You mean . . . I’m not your dinner?” she asked back, her pupils enlarging. Hok’ee smiled slightly, “no.” he replied simply, still trying to get a grip on this conversation thing.
    “Then why has Kajika taken me to his evil lair?” she questioned suspiciously, taking a step nearer to him; limping slightly. He raised an eyebrow, “Kajika?”
    “You’re him, aren’t you? You have the wings to match.” the girl remarked, glancing up at them. Hok’ee stole a glimpse at his wings as well, turning back to her, still baffled.
    “Don’t tell me you don’t know your own legend!” she added in disbelief, visibly clenching her teeth together. He looked over one of her wings; they dripped with dark blood. Hok’ee made a move to help her, only to have her back away again, with a scared look embedded in her blue eyes.
    “Please?” he pleaded, taking another step. This time she didn’t move, so he took another step, then another. A moment later she slide to the ground, seeming to not really care anymore if he planned on eating her or not. Leaning down, he took a look at the metal “thing” planted in her wings. “This is going to hurt,” he commented plainly.
    “Comforting.” she responded with a sarcastic smile, already wincing. For a while they were both silent as he worked, when she broke the silence. “If your name isn’t Kajika, what is it, anyway?” for a second he looked back at her, “Hok’ee.” he replied lowly, going back to his work.
    “I’m Harmosa, if you were wondering.” Harmosa said, tapping one of her paws on the stone floor. “So . . . what’s your deal?”
    “I have no deals,” Hok’ee responded half mindedly, just as he jerked his paw up while clasping onto the metal object.
    “Seriously?!” Harmosa exclaimed angrily, pressing against the new open wound. Hok’ee ignored her, staring at the object now completely detached from the viscet. “So strange . . . it’s like they were meant for us.” he pondered.
    “Us?” Harmosa questioned with a raised eyebrow.
    “Our wings.” he responded with a solemn stare. “What else has wings as large as ours?” he continued, practically talking to himself now. Harmosa downcast her eyes, shivering a little. Realizing he wasn’t helping matters, Hok’ee added, “I’ll get the other one out and then you can get some sleep; it’ll be fine.”

--
Figured I mind as well post the first chapter as well !
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Re: a place to put my writing and old stories.

Postby Ranger of the North » Fri Mar 09, 2018 11:26 am

I like Hok’ee already :D
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Re: a place to put my writing and old stories.

Postby ~Teya~ » Fri Mar 09, 2018 12:57 pm

Ranger of the North wrote:
I like Hok’ee already :D

Just you wait.. XD I'm writing chapter four now, just not posting them here, haha ;3
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Re: a place to put my writing and old stories.

Postby Ranger of the North » Fri Mar 09, 2018 2:19 pm

~Teya~ wrote:Just you wait.. XD
should i be worried
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Re: a place to put my writing and old stories.

Postby ~Teya~ » Sat Mar 10, 2018 2:08 pm

Ranger of the North wrote:
~Teya~ wrote:Just you wait.. XD
should i be worried

;)
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Re: a place to put my writing and old stories.

Postby Winchester's Wolf » Sat Mar 10, 2018 3:54 pm

~Teya~ wrote:
Ranger of the North wrote:
~Teya~ wrote:Just you wait.. XD
should i be worried

;)
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By that you should be really really worry.
But I love the storiessssss
Sig is a wip <3
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Re: a place to put my writing and old stories.

Postby ~Teya~ » Fri Mar 16, 2018 9:01 am

Whole story is now posted here

But please do not post there c: If you have any thoughts or criticisms on it, please PM me or post here! =D
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Re: a place to put my writing and old stories.

Postby ~Teya~ » Mon Jun 11, 2018 12:51 pm

New story, click here.
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Re: a place to put my writing and old stories.

Postby ~Teya~ » Mon Oct 01, 2018 7:41 am

Very random nothingness to warm up :3

Opening the bakery door, Jen was overwhelmed by the sweet scent of cake coming from behind the counter. She pushed her round glasses further up her nose, scanning the room. Her palms felt sweaty. She hated standing idle like a deer in headlights.
"Jen!"
She whirled, seeing the radiant face of Freddie with a carefree grin on his face. She forced a shy smile, awkwardly sitting down at the cafe table across from him. Swallowing hard, Jen grabbed a menu, gluing her eyes to the text.
"The special looks good," Jen said in a half murmur, tapping his fingernails frantically against the table and clearing her throat. Her eyes gravitated upwards unwillingly, stealing a glance in his direction. He still had the exact same grin on his face, except now, even bigger. "What's so funny?"
"Well . . . you,"
"What do you mean?" She stammered, suddenly on the defense. Freddie just laughed, resting his hand on his chin.
"You've never been on a date before, have you?"
"Wha--no!" Jen screeched, suddenly feeling the eyes of many in the cafe looking towards her.
---------



Sandra's whole body shook to the bone as her hands flew to her mouth, fighting the near irresistible urge to gag. "Oh . . . oh god--" she gasped, eyes wide as tears streamed down her smooth cheeks.
"Mommy?" Lia questioned, walking down the last step of the nearby stairs. Sandra wheeled towards her daughter, holding her shaky hand out.
"Don't come any closer!" Sandra exclaimed in a panic, only now noticing the blood on the hand she held up. Lia ignored her, staring down at the dark pool of blood by her feet.
"What's that?" Lia murmured, eyes filling with tears. "Did you kill daddy?"
"No!" Sandra said, shaking her head frantically and began to walk towards Lia. Lia backed away, making Sandra stop. Her heart sank.
------------------------



The birds sung their sweet song and the bees hummed around Shia, feeling the long, lush grass tickle her legs as she walked. The trees bound upwards towards the sky, as if reaching for the heavens, but doomed to stay anchored to the dirt via their roots. After all, they would die without sucking nutrition from the earth with their strong roots, but who knows. Maybe they would give that up for a time of being free from the ground they dug into, free to walk for a time before their slow death.


Birds tweeted, echoing throughout the pines. At first, it was a normal song, but it soon grew into a frenzy of loud and obnoxious band of screeches.
Before long, it grew into hysterics. Logan ducked as birds flew overhead, a few even knocking into him, causing him to lay in the dead leaves for cover. His nose wrinkled, picking up an unfamiliar scent. It was a rank, horrid kind of smell that made him want to gag. He could taste it in his mouth, too; bitter like old berries and rancid like rotten meat. The only way of describing it was . . . death.
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