I wish I had told myself to be brave enough to believe in the feeling in my gut at all times.
Defy your parents if you need; there's no need for you to suffer simply to be the obedient child. You are not your parents, you are your own person and have the right to live your life as you wish to live it. When you're old enough to make your own decisions it's okay to fail sometimes in order to learn; there's no need to follow the path other chooses for you when your heart lies elsewhere.
Also, don't stress with choosing what path in life to take. Look back at what those who came before you did, combine it with what you enjoy doing and simply fight for it. You are strong enough, you are brave enough and if you simply put one foot before the other to take that first step ... Everything will fall where they are made to be.
It's okay to try different things to have some light in your life; but don't force it. Let it come to you instead of chasing the bad dreams; stop doing it especially when you realize that they're not for you. You will find your path after trying a few which weren't for you. And trust me, you will love the path from the bottom of your heart and know it to the core of your very soul when it's the right one.
You are home at last and have found your place to belong.