TheComfortCorner | V.7

[! honeysuckle !]

So....I look after disabled kids on Sundays. I'm a young adult who gets where they're coming from and understands. One of my kids was in a wheelchair. He was abused by a babysitter and left paralyzed, and we all loved him dearly. And yesterday, he died from sepsis. And I'm devastated and angry and just a wreck and now my boyfriend can't even talk to me he's such a mess and I feel like I made him worse. I'm sick and miserable and just want to sleep for maybe a few years.

I admire you for doing such a kind and amazing thing (looking after the disabled children), and I think if you are feeling angry and devastated and miserable then just remember all the amazing things you've done to help people, and I'm sure that boy's life was made much better by you and the other help. Sorry if I worded that wrong or if it came across rude or something.

[Lechuga]

tired
depressed
self conscious about way too many things
small comments keep affecting the way I live
not enough

[neferp1tou]

i hate crying

[GenericGadget]

what am i even doing, i just wanna sleep forever...

[Swishy & Broken]

What else can I do to feel better? I can't draw anymore, I can't read, I can't do my work.. I can't play Overwatch because J used to play it with me all the time. Everything I am is a reminder of him. It hurts so much, I miss him.

[hongjoongie.]

i dont understand
no matter what i try to do, everyone always looks at what i've done wrong
i get up and it hasn't even been an hour before my dad yells at me
my mom is yelling at all of us saying we need to do our part and we're a family
i put my dishes in the dishwasher this morning because you yelled at me last night
and i get in trouble because i forgot ONE mug

if this is what it means to be a part of this family, i don't want to be a part of it. im sick of being forced to do things i dont want to do and im sick of being yelled at for the smallest things.
wake up and realize that im suffering
please
im not the child you think i am
im not the happy-go-lucky child i used to be.

i dont need a response. i just need to get my thoughts and feelings together.

[yaksha.]

I have so many things to finish and I don't know why I never
learn not to load myself up with so much work !!!! I always
want to run and my avoidance shoots up and I want to die
for being so slow with things,,

[hellebore]

I have a tendency to avoid interaction with the people I most want to be friends with. Yesterday, one of those people initiated interaction with me after I had planned to refrain from initiating myself. Now just today, when I was uptown to visit a place for my art project, my mom found me and insisted that we visit the shop of a nearby café. One of those people I like works there, but I thought, "what are the odds I'll see him?" To make those odds impossible, I purposefully kept my eyes on the products and nowhere else. Well, I then heard his voice, calmly panicked, and headed for the door. My mom came after me and asked rather loudly, "DOES THAT GUY KNOW YOU?" Oh dear. But anyway, apparently, he caught sight of my hat and proceeded to peer over the counter seemingly with the intention of getting my attention.
Part of me is relieved I left so quickly because we would have ended up talking--but the part of me that is not mentally ill is absolutely furious that I reacted so badly because of just that--because we could have talked. Maybe we would have become acquaintances and then friends.
A friend wants to get coffee, so I suppose, I suppose I could counter that anxiety and go back. It seems like a difficult feat. I'd be afraid of crying. I'm already now in regular contact with seven people, but I do truly want to befriend him. I'll go, try my best to keep it together, leave him a $20 tip and hope for the best.
At least that's what I tell myself. I don't want anxiety to ruin opportunities anymore.

[uniiversally]

i just
constantly
feel horrible
horrible horrible horrible
and i don't know how to fix it
it's just
ugh

[Pudd;]

Nobody really cares about me. I say I have a problem. "Everything will be fine, " "Oh no, therapists don't care, " "It'll go away, " and you know what? That doesn't help me. It's been forever, and still they make me feel bad about wanting to get help. Sometimes I wonder if it matters anymore. Like, nobody can give a care about me. I feel alone. Nothing is working. All I have is myself. I'm the only one who cares about me, I feel.