[clip ♡]

i'm about to hop on the betterment train are ya'll ready

So I don't have the best track record for completing commissions by the dates I've set. That's usually no big deal, and the commissioners are super patient and understanding, but the thing that kills me is that there's no real reason the dates aren't being met. I wish I could say it's because I was busy, or something happened with my computer, but there's no excuse for why I fail time and time again to get pieces done in a reasonable amount of time. I could sit down and force myself to muster up the drive to just get them done, but instead I spend days pushing it aside and doing anything else.
A few days is not usually a problem, but it's just day after day. And then the days turn into weeks which turn into months, and I have essentially ghosted the commissioner and dodged the artwork. I'm not proud of it and I feel extremely guilty.

A couple years ago, I had an official art shop in which I would take on three to five commissions at one time. Now, I know this is a bad move for me to make, but back then I was mostly just concerned with making the most pet profit in a short amount of time. The last batch of commissions I took on were in no way difficult for me to draw, and yet I continued to put them off, until seven months had gone by and I had nothing to show for it. Seven months. And during that time, I gave no effort to reach out to the commissioners to explain why this happened. I kept pushing the dates back and not meeting them, and eventually I ghosted that entire responsibility. I did complete the work, albeit seven to eight months after I received payment, and by then almost all of the commissioners were inactive. I sent each of them a private message with their art piece and a sincere apology, but to this day, none of those messages have been received.
I am so profoundly guilty about this and it kills me to know that those commissioners potentially thought they had been cheated out of their valuable pets. It kills me to think that they have never received the pieces they were so excited for. It is entirely my fault and I take full responsibility. I agonized over those pieces for months, worried what the commissioners must think, and yet I made no move to actually get it done, even though it would have taken me just a mere two hours. Two hours of work that took me seven months. And yet I continue to take on multiple commissions at a time, and nearly each time I fail to meet the deadlines I've set.

I am extremely and profoundly sorry for my actions and they are in no way excused. In light of this, I've decided to close any form of commissions for a while, until further notice. In this time I am hoping to figure out what is causing me to struggle so much to complete work within a reasonable amount of time and work to correct it. If I do decide to open any form of commissions again in the future, I will only be accepting one at a time in hopes that this will help.
For those who I owe art, I will try to complete your commission soon. I can make no promises and set no deadline, but I will try my best to force myself to sit down and work on it. Thank you to all commissioners for having so much patience and lenience with me, even though I may not have deserved it.


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For everyone who actually read this fully, thank you. I don't blame you if you hold some ill emotion towards me after reading, because I sure do. But I'm trying to be better, and that means laying things out on the table that I might not want to admit. But I've learned from this, and am still learning from it! thank you guys uwu

this also didn't take that long to complete. I was eating and playing with my pupper and doing other things and I left it open because,,, well I don't know why but I did haha

[hypnowave]

as someone who can also struggle with finishing owed work, especially in the past, i can tell you that sometimes people are just like that. commissions are a form of work, a form of labor; while some people are able to enjoy doing that work, finishing it in a short amount of time, others simply can't garner any enjoyment from doing that work and tend to avoid it. things like executive dysfunction also come into play; you might not know it, but maybe factors like that could be playing a part in your difficulty to finish art for other people.

personally, i find it much easier to just do work that i enjoy, drawing out what i want to at any given time. being more selective with commissions can also help; consider whether or not you'd actually enjoy drawing a certain character, and pick base on those whims :"0 i remember setting up a free art shop after finishing my commissions, and i actually had a LOT more fun doing those, because there was little to no pressure since i stated upfront that i wouldn't be able to draw everyone's character.

discipline can be hard to learn. if you wish to encourage yourself to be a more dilligent worker in terms of commissions, by all means, i encourage you to do so! but also remember to take breaks and be kind to yourself. consider the sacrifices and rewards of doing commissions, and think of all the factors coming into play. are you dissatisfied with only earning virtual currency? are you unhappy that you can't develop your art skills through commissions? every artist is different, so do a bit of self-searching without comparing yourself to others.

of course, all of the above are just recommendations and/or personal anecdotes. i can't give you any truly solid advice, but i wish you good luck on resolving this issue 💙

[JK341]

^ i absolutely agree with everything that Rey said!

I had a few struggles myself with commissions that also lead me to generally not accepting them, unless under rare circumstances. I also personally find it much more enjoyable doing as Rey does and pretty much just art for yourself and for the leisure and relaxation of it. <3

I do wish the best for you for whatever path you take on this. c:

[clip ♡]

as someone who can also struggle with finishing owed work, especially in the past, i can tell you that sometimes people are just like that. commissions are a form of work, a form of labor; while some people are able to enjoy doing that work, finishing it in a short amount of time, others simply can't garner any enjoyment from doing that work and tend to avoid it. things like executive dysfunction also come into play; you might not know it, but maybe factors like that could be playing a part in your difficulty to finish art for other people.

personally, i find it much easier to just do work that i enjoy, drawing out what i want to at any given time. being more selective with commissions can also help; consider whether or not you'd actually enjoy drawing a certain character, and pick base on those whims :"0 i remember setting up a free art shop after finishing my commissions, and i actually had a LOT more fun doing those, because there was little to no pressure since i stated upfront that i wouldn't be able to draw everyone's character.

discipline can be hard to learn. if you wish to encourage yourself to be a more dilligent worker in terms of commissions, by all means, i encourage you to do so! but also remember to take breaks and be kind to yourself. consider the sacrifices and rewards of doing commissions, and think of all the factors coming into play. are you dissatisfied with only earning virtual currency? are you unhappy that you can't develop your art skills through commissions? every artist is different, so do a bit of self-searching without comparing yourself to others.

of course, all of the above are just recommendations and/or personal anecdotes. i can't give you any truly solid advice, but i wish you good luck on resolving this issue 💙

I'll often put off commissions or work in order to do or draw something I personally enjoy, and I think I definitely see commissions as a form of labour that I just need to get done so I can move on. It's difficult because I'm often excited to open commissions, but then when I actually have to do them, my motivation and drive just fly out the window never to be seen again haha.
I think discipline is definitely something I want to become better at, but I will also make sure not to work myself too hard!

I think a part of it is that I want to broaden my horizons, so to speak, and earn CAD for my work, but I have a fear that the commissioners aren't going to happy with the result. I also have social anxiety so enforcing rules and dealing with all types of customers is something I'd have to get used to.

Thank you for your response!! ♡♡

^ i absolutely agree with everything that Rey said!

I had a few struggles myself with commissions that also lead me to generally not accepting them, unless under rare circumstances. I also personally find it much more enjoyable doing as Rey does and pretty much just art for yourself and for the leisure and relaxation of it. <3

I do wish the best for you for whatever path you take on this. c:

I definitely enjoy art a lot more when it's just for myself, and there's no added element of pressure with it.
Thank you ♡♡