[oat milk]

j: if you had a superpower what would you want it to be
p: TELEPATHY
s: shapeshifter. you?
j: well first of all i'd want to be able to rotate my head 360 degrees
s: ooh like an owl
j: yeah and like i'd just want to be insanely flexible
p: that's just elastigirl
p: you want to be elastigirl
j: yeah basically
p: would you make yourself thick if you could do that
j: oh i'd make myself DISGUSTINGLY thick

..

p: would you wear a dress if someone paid you money
j: well it depends on how much money
p: okay how much money would someone have to pay you to get you to wear a dress for an entire day
j: uhh i'd say $2000
p: two thousand dollars are you joking
p: that's a lot
j: well for an entire day
j: what, are you paying? i want a new desktop