Bea Santello wrote:"My entire life feels like running after something that keeps moving away into the distance while I stay in the same place."
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ㅤname: jubilee (juju/juu/bee/bee bee for short)
ㅤgender: female (she/her)
ㅤsong that describes them: "the spine song" - cake bake betty
ㅤimage/gif: ←
ㅤ500 words:
mean. a prude. snappish. those are all things that can describe jubilee. she's not friendly, she doesnt want friends, and she definitely doesnt want to the responsibilities that come with being a friend. she's a free spirit, a risk-taker, and she doesnt like to go with the flow--she follows her own course, alone.
jubilee was somewhat more sociable when she was younger, but not by much--instead of being cold to everyone she met, she was too shy to ever approach or continue the conversation. not much has changed since then, except her shyness grew into bitterness and resentment for reasons no one knows. she stays to herself, avoids the spotlight, and satisfies her occasional craving for attention and socialization with the minimal contact she has with her family.
jubilee's family is a tough subject for her, and she doesnt like to bring it up much, if at all. she knows she's not as great as she could be, and she's probably thoroughly stepped on and smashed to itty bitty pieces any plans they might've had for her, and talking about them just feels like a reminder that she's basically the big family disappointment and that she ruined every chance she had for a future with them in it, or one at all.
she is, for all she puts up her cold, hostile outward demeanor, a very quiet person most of the time. she doesnt like talking much--she prefers the silence--and it helps her to think when there's no noise dominating her thoughts constantly. she sleeps easier knowing there's nothing in the room to disturb her or listen to her. this avoidance is partially caused by her paranoia, and fear that she is always being watched and monitored. there's no explicit reason for it, it's just been something apart of her life since forever, at least from what she can remember. her memory isnt the best, but she tries her best.
jubilee enjoys the simple things in life, and she can often be found with her nose buried in a book or magazine of some sort. she engrosses herself in each word, each letter, allowing herself to travel to all kinds of different worlds, far, far away from the boring one she lives in. she dreams of fantastical worlds that could take her away from here, showing her things she could only dream of seeing, and no one from her universe has ever seen before. it's a childish thought, a dream that wont ever come true, she'll admit, but she loves the thought nonetheless, and enjoys spending time wondering about the what-if's and the possibilities, however unlikely they may be.
[ 439/500 ]
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ㅤextra no.1: (300 words total)
a night in the woods wrote:x
it's cold out tonight. really, really cold.
you guess it would be, considering it's winter, and with winter comes the usual cold spell, though you think this one is particularly chilly this year.
...to be honest, you.. dont really know why you're here. you guess it could be the depressing loneliness that comes with your life choices, or your failure to succeed at literally anything in your life, or the--
ok, stop. you cant keep doing this to yourself. look at you, being all mopey. that's not what you're about. at least, not usually. you think. maybe.
probably...
okay seriously, enough of that. you're jubilee..whatever your last name is now. you're better than this. you are better than this. you could be doing a lot of things other than being a sad sack in the woods, like...
like.. like...
okay, too much thinking. back to your original thought: you dont actually know why you're in the woods at three in the morning.
you arent one to break the rules, just because the possibility of bringing attention to yourself freaks you out pretty bad, and you dont want that kind of thing attached to your reputation, and you dont want to disappoint your parents anymore than you already have, but.
tonight is different. you dont know why, or how, it just. is.
kind of like you. you're not here for a certain reason, and you're not here to fulfill a certain purpose, you just. exist.
wow, you're being really philosophical tonight. what's wrong with you? are you feeling okay? do you have a fever and you just never noticed it before?
no. you're fine. you feel fine, at least.
maybe you just.. need to rest. really, actually rest.
...yeah. a rest would be good for you, you think. really good, actually.
[ 300/300 ]
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ㅤextra no.2 (?): goodnight
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- i was going to do something else when i realized this fits jubilee much better than it would have with the other one.
