[chaotic creativity]

username: sharpiesandhamilton
kalon # 1681
name: jonas
what is something you're proud of yourself for accomplishing in 2019?: in 2019, i joined the wonderful community of create a game. i am the most active in create a clan, but the discord has become like home to me. i have come more out of my shell and even grown healthier mentally. i've never been very good at being outgoing and making friends, but this discord and community has helped me so much. so, this year i have grown more as a person. 2018 wasn't the best year for me, i struggled with quite a harsh mentality and some bad confidence skills, but 2019 opened new doors and i don't struggle with these problems as much anymore.

username: sharpiesandhamilton
kalon # 1682
name: cassiopeia
what is something you want to do in 2020?: i want to grow as a writer in 2020. i write constantly for my create a clan, chessclan, and i want to get better. i am proud of my skills already, but i know i can be better. i have several people i want to be as good as in the create a game community, so i have goals set such as staying up to date with my clans for writing as well as a new 2000 word minimum per post i am implementing for any post in the year 2020. i hope that 2020 is as good a year for me as 2019 was, and if it is, then i could possibly achieve my goals.

username: sharpiesandhamilton
kalon # 1683
name: jerry
what is something you're proud of a friend for doing in 2019, or want to happen to them in 2020?: one of my friends finally stopped being friends with a very toxic human being. it was very hard for her, as this person used to be one our best friends and used to be such a nice person. she quickly turned toxic when she got a boyfriend she could control, as she realized she could control other people too using her high place (which she earned unfairly) in our marching band. it was so hard for my friend to let go of her because the memories of the old person was very much still how she viewed her. she finally opened her eyes and saw how toxic it was being around her and cut ties with her which has made her a happier and more approachable person these past two months.

[lovestruck]

username: lovestruck
kalon # 1681
name: Melisande
what is something you're proud of yourself for accomplishing in 2019?: I’m proud of myself for accepting the fact that I don’t need hundreds of friends to validate my own worth- that the few close ones who care are the ones who truly matter. I’m proud of myself for continuing to push and not give up, even when it felt like I was the only one who believed in myself, and when I felt so alone. I’m proud of myself for remaining true to myself and my values, always. I’m also proud of myself for improving my art (even if not by much) and trying new things! Mostly I’m proud of myself because I made it through the year- I’m ok, at the end of it all.

username: lovestruck
kalon # 1683
name: Bartholomew
what is something you're proud of a friend for doing in 2019, or want to happen to them in 2020?: I hope she continues to grow more comfortable with herself. I hope she learns that she’s worth more than the guys she spends her time with. I hope she realizes just how beautiful and perfect she is just she way she is and that she doesn’t need to change a thing.
I hope my other friend continues to learn to get out of her shell, and that things get easier for her- that she’s able to find people she really clicks with. I hope she finds happiness, I hope she is truly happy in 2020. I hope she learns not to be afraid of being herself

[bluewingz]

Mark x

[deerbroken]

username: lavender towns
kalon # 1681
name: Zeta
what is something you're proud of yourself for accomplishing in 2019?: I'm really proud of myself for bringing my life together. 2018 was a hard year for me. I was more depressed than I'd ever been, I had health problems, I lost most of my friends because I was constantly tired and had nothing good to say. I dropped out of my dream school because I couldn't drag myself out of bed to go to class and I barely left the building at all. I would eat snacks from the vending machine instead of going to the dining hall because I didn't have the energy to go in and talk to anyone. And when I dropped out I moved into my mom's basement and essentially did nothing but sleep and try to remember that I'm supposed to take medication to help with my mental state. I was constantly miserable and I hadn't seen a therapist in nearly a year. I talked with some of my family and I went to see an old psychiatrist that used to treat my dad. He told me that some of the lab work I'd had done months ago in the summer came back very negative and that there were a lot of things that needed to change. I wasn't very motivated, but it was nice to know that some of the problems I was having weren't because I was lazy or unmotivated, I was genuinely sick and parts of my body weren't working. At all.

It's a few hours from 2020, and it's been a long trip to get here but I'm so proud of myself for getting help and going back to school. I wasn't sure what I was going to do when I left college for the first time and I was worried that I might just live in my mom's basement until she got sick of me and kicked me out. I didn't know what I was going to do to eat. And now I'm in school, and I might try to volunteer or something in the summer or take classes if not that. I'm genuinely happy and I wake up every morning (or right now every night because my sleep schedule is wack) with my cat sitting next to me and purring happily because she's glad that I'm happy too. 2018 was terrible. 2019 was better. 2020 will be great. And I'm so excited that I've come so far, and that there's only further roads to travel. And I'm glad to have shared it with you and all of y'all furries in the kalon community. Writing, drawing and having something to do in my spare time has given me purpose and helped me keep some of my skills sharp for school, and when I graduate and go on as an adult with the next part of my life I'll look back at the things I did here fondly (assuming I take a hiatus or something, bc tbh i love kalons and I'll probably always be around to ramble about my characters and draw on oekaki.)

I'm also proud of myself for being more out as a trans person- it can be scary, and difficult, but I had a lot of help with my old therapist and with my new one I'm looking at starting T and getting my name changed next year. I've had a lot of support both from my family and from the CS community and while there are still people out there with a lot of hate for lgbt+ folks, I'm not worried about them or what they think. I'm excited to start hormone transitioning and I've been using my preferred name for a while now, so it's easier to introduce myself that way and fit in as someone who identifies as male. I still get misgendered sometimes but it doesn't bother me as much as it did; I know who I am, and I know that looks can be deceiving, and that one day people will look at me and call me sir and see me the way that I see myself.

Anyway I got really sappy I'm sorry but Happy New Year everyone! I hope it's great for all of us!

[fish-soda]

username: fish-juice
kalon # 1681
name: sherice
what is something you're proud of yourself for accomplishing in 2019?: throughout the past year there's been many times where i've felt so defeated and exasperated, as it felt like i was going nowhere; just at a complete stand still with my plans. but looking back, i've been able to wake up and realize that i did more than i believed to move ahead and better myself, and i'm the most proud of erasing as much of the negativity that surrounded me as possible. i've been able to disassociate myself from people whose behavior and actions have been toxic for a long while now, some who are unfortunately family, as well as leave my last two jobs as i wouldn't stand for working in the environments i found myself in. i already feel so much more free and ready to continue on in the best way i can! [138 words]

username: fish-juice
kalon # 1682
name: airina
what is something you want to do in 2020?: i absolutely want to pursue my goals as much as i possibly can! my anxiety and extreme tendency to overthink have held me back in the past by making me second guess all my choices and wonder if everything i'd like to do is really what i should do. but i'm determined to start changing my mentality in this upcoming year, as well as being more set on my plans, starting with graduating nursing school and finding a good part-time job that will support me throughout. i also hope to keep developing my art, which is something i don't want to let go of despite being more focused on my main career path. [113 words]

[Topazolite]

username: Phantump
kalon # 1681
name: Nezumi
what is something you're proud of yourself for accomplishing in 2019?: I’m proud of myself for a lot of things surprisingly, but especially how I learned how to like myself and my art! I’ll admit I’m still a beginner but I’m really much more confident on my art now than in 2018. I’ve improved a lot as a person and as an artist (or at least I hope so)
I also designed a lot of characters that were stuck in my mind with no real references and also wrote backstories for some of them. That may be a simple task but I’m really uncreative in terms of writing so thats a big step for me!

username: Phantump
kalon # 1683
name: Acorn
what is something you're proud of a friend for doing in 2019, or want to happen to them in 2020?: Honestly I’m proud of a lot of stuff my friends make! But I’m most proud of 2 of em since they improved quite a lot in terms of art and overall personality! They achieved their goals really easily and were recognized (at least a bit) for their talent last year, so that’s a big accomplishment imo
For 2020 I just want em to continue improving and being positive? I’m really bad with words but I think you get what I mean

[~Levi~]

username: ~Levi~

kalon # 1681
name: Natasha
what is something you're proud of yourself for accomplishing in 2019?: 2019 had been a pretty eventful year for me, I’ve started to get ready to move countries and had several big exams. I feel very proud of how well I’ve managed so far in organising the move and planning everything out though I can’t take full credit - my mum still helped quite a bit. Other than that, I’m also pretty proud of learning Swedish to a stronger level as I am half Swedish. However, I have never learnt Swedish properly and prior to this year I could only speak a bit and could not write at all. But now I am able to write pretty well and speak almost fluently.

kalon # 1682
name: Dameon
what is something you want to do in 2020?: As I'm heading back into Uni I want to try and focus more on my studies - this is something I struggle with due to procrastination mostly and a short attention span. I also want to try and get involved in more clubs and get to know more new people as I'll be moving to a new country (lol I'm an introvert so this shall be interesting). Anyways I also hope to also follow the news and politics more closely so that I can stay up to date with the world, this is as I find it important to know about what’s happening. Or as my dad says “History in the making”. Anyways~ Good Luck to everyone!

kalon # 1683
name: Blaze
what is something you're proud of a friend for doing in 2019, or want to happen to them in 2020?: One of my closest friends has recently managed to get into her police academy in the top ten of the entries (excuse the not technical language lol - I’m not exactly sure what the correct ones are). Anyways, she’s practised so hard and so long for this and didn’t give up when she first didn’t manage to get in. And I can’t be prouder of her, she really is so persistent and didn’t give up on herself. And I hope things will continue to go well for her and that she succeeds in holding her top ten positions for this next year.

[chlorophyll]

username: Leafy.
kalon # 1681
name: Hollister
what is something you're proud of yourself for accomplishing in 2019?: My art has really come a long way in the past year or two, I feel like I've improved so much from where I was easily a year ago. Even just last year's sketchbook I feel like it was bad, and I'm slowly starting to fix up major problems and things. Other people around me have sort of noticed too, which just makes me. Hapby to say the least. I've made new friends connecting over these things I love and they're quite hinestly so much of better friends than I've had before; the greater amounts of similarities between me and them and are interests are much closer, and even the level of just being able to talk in general seems better. We're able to just chill, draw in a corner and help each other out, laugh at whatever weird stuff people bring in. I've learned things from them skillwise and I also feel like I've learned about myself through them, too, but honestly I would never have the courage to tell them so.


username: Leafy.
kalon # 1682
name: Soridel
what is something you want to do in 2020?: I'd really like to keep figuring myself out and figuring out just being less of an awkward person when talking to people irl. I'm definitely a better speaker when typing on the internet. I can just write out what I want to say, change it a bit, perfect it so it sounds normal if I realize it's kind of weird. I can undo what doesn't work and redo what I think would be better, but didn't. Heck, I could edit something after its already been said and fix things up. But through all that, I really wish I could do that and get those messages right when actually speaknig in person to someone. I can't take back my words. I can't retcon what I said in the past. I can't say something I wanted to say then because that isn't now. And it becomes a problem, too, because I know all these people in a sort of "acquaintance with" know and not a real knowing. My problems with being able to just say somethng without making it weird means I really don't have any close friends, and I want to change that. I want to be able to get to know someone. I want to be able to be trusted by my friends. And I know that a lot of them don't trust me as well as I'd like, simply because they don't feel they know me well enough. It hurts sometimes, I guess, but I can only keep trying.

username: Leafy.
kalon # 1683
name: Posey
what is something you're proud of a friend for doing in 2019, or want to happen to them in 2020?: One friend of mine has really been able to move away from more toxic other friends, and harmful relationships, which I'm really glad she's been able to do. She's sort of an... exciting? person friend-wise, a lot of people she knows really know how to get into the drama, so she gets caught up in it, and we hear all about it later. But she's really found how some of these drama-full, gossipping groups aren't very good on the "healthy relations" scale with their constant taking in a friend group. With these realizations she's been able to distance farther from these not great people, and get closer to the ones she'd rather be around, which I suppose I'm more proud of since I guess I'm not as good at just leaving and fixing those problems. She's a really nice and charismatic person, so of course I wish the best upon her and everything that happens just.

[rab1es]

username: rab1es
kalon # 1681
name:
what is something you're proud of yourself for accomplishing in 2019?:

username: rab1es
kalon # 1682
name:
what is something you want to do in 2020?:

mark!

[fawn,,]

username: fawn,,
kalon # 1681
name: Pixie
what is something you're proud of yourself for accomplishing in 2019?: I know that senior school can get pretty tough socially for kids. It really happens to everyone at some point but in 2019, some pretty crap stuff happened. Definitely not gonna go into the details, but im really proud of myself for pushing through the bad times, despite what was happening. Especially expanding my friend circle, (cause socialising is not my best quality aha) and not letting the anxiety of the situation control my life. I'm proud of myself for realising that i don't need one's opinion to validate myself. Life goes on, and at the moment, 2020 is looking really promising to me! <3

username: fawn,,
kalon # 1682
name: Demi
what is something you want to do in 2020?: My main goal for 2020 is to work on becoming more assertive, as I think in future, that may help socially and maybe less obstacles mentally (provided if i work hard)
I'm getting a lot of help from others, who i am greatly thankful to, to help complete this goal. Through 2019, my confidence
levels were sort of declining, so I really to put in some effort get them back up again. My visions for 2020 aren't obscured, so with
a clear mind, i can be more productive c:
I hope i can stick to my new years resolution and try not to get sidetracked <3

Happy new years everyone <3