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________________________________________________________________________________________________________textjoel stared down at the bowl duncan had set before him on the table, tired eyes trained somewhere distant. the last few
days were a blur in his mind, the ache in his body the only reminder of a life that he'd once lived. he didn't remember it all, his
mind was too rattled from it, but the days after remained painfully clear at the forefront of his memory. well-wrapped bandages
and itchy gauze shifting around his collar caused pepper's face to flash before him as he reached out to take hold of a fork. the
wolf's dark brows knit tightly together, thoughts of a lieutenant almost invasive. eggs, bacon, mostly protein... but no potatoes.
surely by this time, he should have been adjusted to change. joel had done it before, after all; he'd had to uproot his life and
go somewhere else, had to leave everything known and comfortable to him behind without the option to turn back. that was a
bit easier said than done... he was old, and it only grew more difficult to adapt with time.
textand yet, as he healed he felt stronger than he had in years. the wolf in him was awake, now, and there was little he could
do other than accept that fact. a wolf's body was much more resilient than a man's, didn't age or depreciate as steep or as fast
as a human's did. just two weeks ago, he'd been filing papers for early retirement as his bones crackled and his joints offered
their weary complaints. the former doctor felt better now than perhaps he ever did, had wrestled with a werewolf and taken
a bullet to the sternum with relative ease. his psychological state was in a much worse state than his physical one, and it was
a realization that made him miss lee all the more. and andy... joel took a bite of his food as his eyes burned, his vision misting
and his fingers quivering more than he would like.
texteverything was gone. the taste of blood on his tongue wouldn't go away, no matter what he tried to drown it with. whiskey,
coffee, soap... nothing helped erase the tang of it, and that alone made him fearful of how long he'd have to live with it. days?
months? would it be part of him until he died? lord, he could hardly stand the thought... to carry that like he carried the images
of his found family, their looks of fear and of pity and of guilt. he hated that, almost as much as he'd begun to hate himself. fat
tears began to bead on his lashes and spill over, running to his chin as he chewed slowly, deliberately on his food. he nodded, a
slow, thinking nod, and tried to ground himself in the salty, savory taste of a fulfilling breakfast. he needed to at least try, to
give some effort in brainstorming an option for the future. they couldn't stay here, as much as joel wanted that to be the truth.
the BSA would come for them, and he was too old in their eyes to completely relearn life, or to adapt to the outside world as
something foreign to himself. they'd put him down, probably put the both of them down. like they'd tried to with the fiery pup.
texthe owed it to duncan to at least try.
textjoel reached out and rested a heavy palm on duncan's back, patting him firmly as he swallowed and cleared his throat. "it's
good," he rasped softly, his voice more somber, more soft than he intended. "...real good, kid."