My neighbor, Friend, Gardener, and Devil

[Honeypetal]

➸

"Sense you have not interest in these little devils, I shall take care of these little menaces for you.

Just as Theo had brushed them out of his mind, Irithyll quickly brought up the berries again. Almost immediately, he took a breath to argue the case. Irithyll got there first with a smile and a "don't worry about it." Theo still had his doubts and found himself assessing the situation, watching the other man pick up the berries with a little suspicion and a little concern.

Irithyll was probably the most organised, sensible, responsible, clear-minded, plant-savvy person he knew. So the chances of him accidentally eating poisonous berries he'd already identified as poisonous were...low. "Huh, if you say so. Careful you don't eat 'em, all right?" he settled into a relaxed position again with a small frown, unaware that he'd sat up straight and alert at the prospect of his poisonous berries running loose.

He accepted the requested honey with a keen smile and spooned another heap of sticky golden liquid into the tea. It didn't take long for him to finish it then; he took gulps where Irithyll took sips. As soon as he'd drained the last dregs of tea, which was mostly thick and sweet with honey, he sighed loudly and set the cup down with a clack. As soon as he noticed the silence, he launched into his questions, barely even registering Irithyll's blank look when he mentioned the Wallaces. Everyone knew everyone around here, or at least he did.

"Hmm, interesting. Very interesting."

"Mm, tough decision, right? We could do both." Theo ventured, watching Irithyll intently as he seemed to consider his options. When his gardening buddy looked like that, Theo always got the feeling he was about to say he had plans; the herbs were growing too wild and they needed pruning, he needed to deliver something somewhere, he was ill and bedridden and no he didn't need Theo going over with medicine. This time, however, he had a different answer altogether.

"To answer your inquiring concerning my schedule, I would have to say I don't have anything particular planned."

"Oh? Yeah?" Theo nodded eagerly, waiting for the elaboration. He was free, he seemed thoughtful, he seemed to be considering something-

"I believe you mention a Bake sale? That was for today, correct?"

"Yeah that's right, charity bake sale today. Community hall, starting at 1. All welcome." Theo listed off all the information he knew, rapid-style, leaning further across the table as the suspense started to rise and flutter in his chest. Could it be-?

A beat. Irithyll smiled a little bit. "It's a bit late, but I believe I could whip something up-"

"Hey, there we go!" the officer clapped his hands together and beamed excitedly at Irithyll. "It'll be fu-"

"-provided." Irithyll cut him off sharply, a rather aggravated expression darkening his eyes and tightening his facial features. Theo clamped his jaw shut immediately and smiled amiably, nodding for him to continue. Boy, he could be scary. The gardener paused to seemingly emphasise his exasperation before continuing on.

"-you don't eat half of them as you have done in the past."

Ah, he'd forgotten about that. The case of the missing cookies, quickly solved by Irithyll. One of those things he didn't regret, to this day. "Well, no promises!" he said cheerfully, reclining back from the table and into his chair with a small creak. He still remembered those cookies and they were good cookies. Gooey with melted chocolate and still-warm from the oven; unbelievably moreish. They could've dropped the cranberries for some milk chocolate chips, but he hadn't told Irithyll that. He'd been too busy hurrying out and apologising profusely to worry about such trivial matters.

Irithyll's sour expression didn't seem to shift at all with his reply, and in fact, his gaze felt a little more intense. Maybe it was too soon to speak so freely about those fallen biscuits.

"But I'll be on best behaviour, just for you." Theo added on to his original reply with a click of his tongue and the most reassuring look he could muster. He sensed that his neighbour was not amused by the notion that he'd help himself to even more of his unguarded baked goods.

"Anyway, sounds great! Amazing, even." he quickly breezed past what he only assumed could be a healthy dash of doubt flickering in Irithyll's gaze, smile broadening. He'd done it; he'd tempted Irithyll out of his little hole with, would you believe it, cake. He knew he'd basically promised to not eat whatever he decided to "whip up", but Theo could feel the familiar claws of hunger gripping at his stomach and, frankly, he needed to eat. But first...

"Anything I can do? Crack eggs? Whisk? Uhh...break chocolate?" he asked, listing off all the things he could think of to do with baking. Baking, like gardening, was something Theo dabbled with whenever it struck his fancy. And just like gardening, baking was...not a strong suit. He enjoyed it; the chaos, the thrill of making something and making something edible, but therein the problem lied. He found himself forgetting to check the oven or watch the stove, and the result was a fire alarm blaring, smoke hazing up the kitchen, general chaos and an inedible...thing.

[Ayashi]

▶ ❦ ◀
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Irithyll raised both eyebrows now at the man's nervous, feeling a smile threatening to show on his face. He was deeply amused by the officer's offer to 'break' the chocolate. It was a very laughable image. The lanky man could see it as if it was happening now.

Theodore would be by the counter, a large piece of white chocolate laying innocently before him, unaware of the disaster that would soon befall it. The brown hair man would be holding a large hammer, maybe even a mallet, calmly lifting the instrument above his head before slamming it down on the white bar. With every hit cracks would form below the surface, displaying the amount of force that his neighbor was putting in, all in the effort towards helping his friend. Once the bar was significantly...beaten, Theodore would scrape the manageable pieces into a bowl, before proudly presenting it to his friend with a large smile. A chuckle was about to slip from his lips, the image was really too much.

Finding it would be rude to laugh at his neighbor's honest attempt to help him, Irithyll was quick to disguise the noise with a cough, bringing his hand to hide his smile. "I see." Was all he said for a moment, taking several breaths to calm himself. "That is very kind of you. Indeed. I will greatly appreciate your help in this endeavor to...beat the ingredients together."

Giving his head a small shake, he began to make his way across the kitchen, reaching for the cabinet. Grasping the edges on the frame, Irithyll gave it wooden door a firm jerks, it would always stick in this hotter weather, reveling an assortment of bowels, measuring cups, stone grinders, teaspoons and tablespoons alike. Many of which he used not only to bake, but in his herbal remedies. "Then let us begin."

Pulling together what was necessary to bake the cookies, the gardener began to take charge, motioning Theodore to join him. “First we need to mix the flour and sugar, please be sure to shift the flour as you mix, as this will allow the wet ingredients. “ He listed, pulling the large jars of flour and sugar closer for easier access. “Once that is done pre-heat the oven to-” and so it went between the two men. Irithyll would give instructions over his shoulder as he mixed his batch, while sending exasperated remarks to Theodore when he became too…excited in his efforts.

“Really Theodore, you’re meant to make the mix together IN the bowel, not OUT of it.” He would complain, eyeing the mess in distaste. While he was not often bothered by many messes Theodore often created, he would rather not spend time cleaning a messy kitchen with the bake sale drawing so close.

Despite this, Theodore was quite a help under the gardener's supervision. Irityll was so pleased with the man's progress in helping him, that he allowed the officer the honor of claiming the mixing bowls and wooden spoons, any remaining dough to be eaten as his reward. Soon the completion of two dozen white chocolate ginger snap cookies sat neatly in a large clear tupperware container, ready for the sale. Giving a satisfied nod, Irithyll placed the cover, snapping it in place.

”It is quite busy today,” Irithyll mused to himself, giving his head a brief shake as the wind suddenly decided to play with his bangs. The white bangs danced in his gaze for a moment before tickling his skin. His nose scrunched for a moment at the sensation before he shook his head once more to be rid of the touch. He and Theodore were easily slipping between the lines of bodies through the square on this rather cloudless day. Since the community square was closer to the front gates Theodore was kind enough to offer to drive the pair towards their intended destination.

"Now remember, you must help me in finding these Wallaces. For I have yet to meet them, “The lanky man remind his neighbor, stepping sideways to avoid a collision with a pair of giggling teens as they entered the large building. Yes, he was rather eager shall we say in meeting their returning neighbors.

The community hall echoed with multiple sounds of people, neighbors, friends, and family member alike, all communicating at the same time. In the center of the room laid seven tables, formed in the shape of a square. Many of the tables were covered with flora sheets, with an army of elder women manning each table, conversing with their guests. Each woman seem to be encoring or egging their visitors into trying the many cakes, cookies, and other delectables, in a manner that only the elder could perform. In the center of each table was a jar, with a piece of paper that simply read ‘Charity for the Children’s Hospital’ taped on the inside.

Red eyes fluttered across the area, searching for a table to lay out their treats for the event. “It seems we should have come sooner,” he remarked, slight muffled by the fact that there was little to no space for them to display their master piece. It was Theodore that pointed to a table at the end of the square, guarded by a woman with dark brown hair streaked with stands of white. She wore a dark purple suit that was decorated with a stunning necklace that was emerald color. In fact the woman began to wave at them pair in an excited manner, encoring them to draw closer.

“Theodore! Welcome, welcome, so good of you to come!” Mrs. Shan, one of the elderly women that was often in charge of charity events such as this, greeted. Her hair was done in a tight bun that sat smartly on top of her head. She placed down the tray of brownies she was arranging, turning her attention towards the two men. “And hark, what is this? Have you managed to draw out our hidden lily of the valley out of hiding? Good for you dear!”

Irithyll gave the elder an exasperated expression, ducking his head down. “Really Mrs. Shan, I’m not that much of a recluse that I would consider myself a, ‘hidden lily’.” No indeed, if he had to consider himself any type of flower it would be a foxglove, he thought silently to himself. Beautiful to look at, hidden in the shadows, but quick deadly if you carelessly ate from its gifts.

Mrs. Shan chuckled at his remark, giving the lanky man a soft smile. “Sorry dear, but it’s just so nice to see you again. I was wondering if I wouldn’t be able to see you until the next farmer’s market.” She excepted his tupperware, opening with a grace only a woman of class could perform, “but it seems that our local hero is the only one to draw you out of that greenhouse you call home.” She gave a Theodore a wink, pausing to take a deep breath as she open the container, a soft expression fluttering over her features as the smell of ginger and white chocolate filled the air. “Smells heavenly dears, do you make this, Irithyll?”

The man nodded, “Why yes, but I was not alone in my quest. Our ‘hero’ was quite the helpful assistant in this batch. “Irithyll sent his neighbor a smile, ignoring his whine of protest, closing his eyes as he chuckled. “Though it was quite the adventure in doing so. I had to stop him several times to make sure he did not use Baking Soda instead of salt.”

“Oh my! Surely you jest!”

“I do not.”

And so the banter passed between them, minuscule subjects of discussion, such as rises in gas prices, other events that were happening around the city, to the news, “Did you see the news yesterday? I do hope they find that dear man. Such a terrible thing.” The conversation dulled to a lull before they jumped onto the matter Irithyll was more kingly set on, the issue of the Wallaces family.
“I heard from Theodore that they would be here. In order to properly welcome them to our community. It would be nice, to finally meet my, our, neighbors.” He mention in passing, including Theodore into the discussion. His eyes shifting from person to person in the crowded auditorium.

“Oh yes!” Mrs. Shan chirped, flashing a smile to the man. “I wasn’t too sure if they were coming at all. I was worried they would offer some excuse about another business trip like last time, but Mr. Thompson soon put that fear to rest. In fact I think that’s him conversing with them now.” The elder woman pointed just to the left of the group, to a couple in sharp suits, with a teen boy in oversized clothing, texting away on an iphone.

Irithyll felt his blood run cold as the name Thompson was spoken. His head slowly turn to the direction that the charity woman point, and sure enough, he was soon welcomed by a familiar sight of a blonde hair man in a dark blue officer suit calmly chatting away with the Wallaces.

Him again, the gardener thought to himself in annoyance, balancing his attention between the conversation between Mrs. Shan, Theodore, and his second shadow. Irithyll gave a huff, fighting off a frown that was edging on his lips. His second shadow as he was prone to call him was none other than his neighbor two houses down, Thompson. While the man did not live in his block, the pesky officer seem to make it his life’s mission to thoroughly investigate all the comings and goings of his more quiet neighbors. Irithyll appeared to be on his very short list of persons to integrate this past month.

[Honeypetal]

➸

Theo's whole life for the past week could be described in one word; tiring. Ranging from weird, stressful work days involving false-alarm home invasions and failed "overnight challenges", all the way to entertaining his rambunctious older sister who was visiting for a couple of days, the week had really tested his energy levels. By the end of the week he had decided he needed something to wind down, which was one of the last coherent thoughts he had yesterday evening. Last night, he vaguely remembered getting just a little inebriated and watching a really sad film about a man and his dog, which made him cry hysterically and call an old friend from college, who had told him to go the hell to sleep and stop calling her at 2 am. After that, he remembered very little apart from waking up on the sofa with a headache and a really weird bruise on his wrist. And now, almost two hours later, he was lounging in Irithyll's herb-scented garden and staring intensely at his phone whilst Irithyll himself tended to his huge collection of greens, looking slightly irritated whilst doing so.

It had been around a week since he'd seen Irithyll, after that bake sale. Looking back now, that whole experience had been something of a breakthrough. Getting Irithyll to leave the house and be social was maybe his biggest feat that month. And it'd been fun. A lot of delicious cakes and nice conversations. After chatting with the ever-wonderful Mrs. Shan, the older lady had pointed them in the direction of the elusive couple that Theo had been eager to finally meet. The Wallaces. Both of them were dressed to the nines in sharp suits and armed with vaguely snooty expressions that may have put off the average person. Luckily, Theo wasn't put off by anything and was quick to march over with Irithyll in tow to introduce himself to a slightly put-out Lily and Jason Wallace, and an awkward, quiet boy who was apparently their son. To begin with, the pair of them had been distinctly short and stilted in whatever answers they had for either Theo or Irithyll's polite, ice-breaking questions. After a while, however, Lily had warmed up a little bit and her husband seemed to follow suit; both were really quite pleasant for a while. Unfortunately, it hadn't taken long for Jason to launch into a proud speech about the weird eco company he and his wife worked for, how they'd both come from successful, hard-working and intellectual families, and how entitled the next generation really was. That comment had been extremely pointed, and their son seemed to look like he'd rather be anywhere else. Theo had been quick to leave at that point, though Irithyll had lingered a little while longer before joining him again to marvel at the vast display of cakes which were soon to put him out of pocket. So all in all a good day.

Presently, Theo was also enjoying himself with a bright midday sun warming his skin and birds singing overhead. The air was light and full of nice, earthy smells from the garden; soil and plants and water evaporating in the heat. It was enough to soothe the unpleasant fuzziness in his head and dull ache in his muscles, though he still felt a little rough. After showering and eating a late breakfast, he had ventured over to Irithyll's house and quickly weaseled himself into the other man's home for a nice little chat.

"I think I should get a dog, Irithyll." Theo said absently, still scrolling down his phone and squinting to see past the glare of sunlight on the screen. A local animal shelter's website was displayed in front of him, filled to the brim with pictures of dogs ready for adoption. All sorts of dogs. Big dogs, small dogs, dogs with no hair and dogs who were nothing but hair. A few tiny, bug-eyed chihuahuas; a wiry greyhound with a thousand yard stare; bull terriers with bulging muscles and huge smiles; dogs that looked like walking mops; dogs that looked like villains from old cartoons and even some dogs that looked like horses. One of them caught his eye. "Something like...this." Theo screwed his face up a little and turned his phone screen for Irithyll to see what he'd found. It would be easy to argue that the dog he had picked was actually a 6-foot bear. Bulky and covered in thick layers of black hair, with drooping jowls and a dopey, loving smile. It dwarfed the tiny dog handler who was kneeling and smiling amiably next to it in the picture.

"Pretty cute, huh? I think I'd call her...Minnie. It says here she's really gentle and loves giving wet kisses. Whaddya think?"

[Ayashi]

▶ ❦ ◀
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Joshua, we are talking about something important here, no one wants to hear about your silly video games.

Snip!

No wonder the kids at school walk all over you, Joshua. You hide in our shadows like a delicate flower, stand straight!

Snap!

Maybe if you read a newspaper once and a while instead of playing mindless games you would have a higher IQ to follow what we are saying.

Snip, snap!

You look like you are jay walking boy, do it again, perfect this time!

The murder's ruby eyes where unfocused, garden clippers mindlessly snapping away at his herb garden. He gently rocked back and forth as he trimmed his garden, scuffed jeans now stained with trails of fading grass stains and ash as he keeled down into the dirt. Irithyll wore a white collar shirt, the sleeves were rolled up to his elbows, to avoid any scuffs or cuts to befall the fabric.

His mind aimlessly cycle through snippets of the conversation with the Wallaces at the bake sale. He and Theodore were finally able to meet the elusive family. Lily and Jason Wallace were a prim and proper husband and wife team, dressed in a business causal manner, with leather briefcases and expensive cell phones not to far from their reach. Black, sliver, and browns seem to be the only colors they processed on their person, looking rather off putting in a community affair. Their hair was neatly combed, cloths straight, and nails filled to a T.

Their son, Joshua, or Josh as he preferred, was a different story. Josh stood just behind his off setting parents, dressed in a bright orange hoodie, which seem to wore often by the creases and stains he spotted on the material here and there. His jeans and shoes were in a similar manner, clean, but clearly worn often by the state of their appearance. Josh's hair was also mess, cowlicks sticking up and long bangs occasionally obscuring his vision.

It was rather an unusual image when the murder and police officer happen upon them. The parents were as guarded as they appeared, in fact they seem almost wary when the two men try to talk to them. However, Irithyll was confident that Theodore's bright and confident personality was able to lure the business couple out of their shell after a few moments. That was just Theodore's way.

The conversation was awkward itself as a whole. While Thedore's presents had allowed the Wallaces to become more talkative, the subjected the business parents covered was the recent murders, their business as a whole, the achievements they accomplished, and jabs at their son for not being as 'perfect' as they were. It seem any given opportunity the would jab at their son, seeming to brush off his attempts at conversation or input on any matter. And for a moment, just a split second, Irithyll was back home in the house he grew up in with his grandmother's snipping voice cutting into him like a knife. Irithyll did not like to be reminded of this moment, not at all.

He decided then and there to kill the Wallaces.

"I think I should get a dog, Irithyll." Theodore's voice drifted though, seeming to become background noise as he conjured up a plan for a surprise visit to the Wallaces. Their last one.

Irithyll hummed thoughtfully, giving a nod to please the man as he reviewed a mental check list of all that he would require. He has all of his herbs and other equipment here at home and his workshop not far off. The only problem would be getting Joshua out of the line of fire so to speak. From what he recalled in the bake sale, the young teen seem to be a bit of a shut in, spending a majority of his time in front of a computer screen to escape his parents constant knit picking of his failures to succeed in life.

Irithyll could hardly blame the boy for doing so, having devolved similar tactics in his youth, with his tactics being to stay outside the house for long periods. But the murder hardly wished for the courts to try to pin the death of his parents on Joshua. He was the victim here. But one could never trust the government court system, could they? With Joshua being older than most children of the parents he had killed in the past, Irithyll bet that anything short of a written confession from himself could stop lawyers and the like blaming the teen for hiring contract killers into his home. But perhaps if he had witness to aid Joshua in his defense? But who? The boy didn't seem to have any friend outside of the internet. Never mind the fact the gardener hardly could trust anyone in the neighbor to stand up for the new kid on the block, and on such short notice too. Irithyll chewed on the insides of his cheeks, working his jaw to keep from grinding his teeth as he pondered the matter.

What to do...what to do...

"It says here she's really gentle and loves giving wet kisses. Whaddya think?"

His train of thought derailed, the gardener paused in his activity of trimming to face Theodore. The cop help up his phone from where he was seated, screen facing his friend to revel an image of a large dog that's coat could have been mistaken for shag carpet from the 70s. Irithyll's eyes slowly drifted to the cop, giving the iphone a blank stare, seeming to stare past the massive horse disguised as a dog.

To be honest, helping Theodore to search for a dog that most likely would result in a situation where he would care for the creature or said create ended up running away due to the lack of care, was the last subject on his mind currently. But, maybe. He paused and cocked his head to the left. Just maybe. Slowly, a plan began to formulate, causing a smile to edge along his lips. "She looks like a wonderful...companion, however, could you possible deal with so much hair? I believe a dog such as she would be a tad to much for you with your busy schedule. Could you even take her to work?" He remarked, pushing himself from the ground to dust off his hands.

"But then, I fear I can be a rather poor judge when it comes to these matters. Why don't you invite young Joshua to help you? I believe his mother mention that he volunteers at the shelter. Perhaps he would be better suited in your canine searching than I would. What do you think?"

[Honeypetal]

➸

Theo was used to being completely blanked by Irithyll; used to doing most of the talking with little in return. Every reply he'd been given in the past minute had been either a hum, grunt or, if he was lucky, a single word like "no" or, more rarely "yes". Unphased, he continued to chatter idly about whatever was on his mind. It took him a bit by surprise to hear a whole sentence in reply to talking about the dog he had already called Minnie, and he looked up eagerly to see if he'd finally broken through to the other man.

"She looks like a wonderful...companion, however, could you possible deal with so much hair? I believe a dog such as she would be a tad to much for you with your busy schedule. Could you even take her to work?"

"Not a chance! My boss would murder me." Theo responded cheerfully, pulling the phone back after Irithyl had gotten a good look at his desired pet. He glanced down again to further read about the other dogs currently available for adoption. "But I know a few dog sitters around here who can look after her when I'm gone. See? All bases covered. I swear I'm not charging blindly into this." he tossed a grin Irithyll's way before returning his gaze down to inspect yet another dog. "And I don't care about the hair. That's nothing a good vacuum cleaner can't solve."

It was just like Irithyll to try and be sensible and cautious about something that Theo wouldn't even think twice about. Having an "impulse control" friend was actually proving to be pretty useful. Plenty of his other friends wouldn't ask any questions even if he suggested buying a pet walrus, never mind a dog.

"Oh yeah, he sure does..." Theo mused on that for a moment, sitting back and thinking hard about what to do with this information. The Wallaces hadn't even crossed his mind since the bake sale; overall he'd found them a little uninteresting, and so the thought of them had been shunted to the side in favor of dogs and work and other distractions. But, maybe...A few seconds passed.

"Well how about we go right now?!" he suddenly exclaimed, almost standing up with how quickly he started up, a twinkle in his eye. "I've got nothing to do all day, and sitting here's got me all restless." he sat back a little bit again with a small wince, the sudden bout of excitement bringing back echoes of his previous headache. He rubbed his temples a little before turning his attention to Irithyll once again, smile slowly returning in a mischievous manner as he glanced the other man up and down.

"Maybe you can get a dog too. A poodle! Yeah, I can see you with a poodle. You can even cut its hair like those big bushes you gardeners like to - uh - shear. Topinary, is it? Topiary?"