>>To the Galaxy and Back<< A 1x1.

[Captain Plucky]

Hearing that Obi-Wan's first solo mission didn't turn out very good, Claudia wondered if she would be the same way. After all, even with her Master by her side, she seemed to mess up. For a moment, she really thought deeply on one question: Was she really ready for this? What would happen if she failed? She would probably get held back in her training, and lose trust from Obi-Wan and become a disappointment. Sensing herself losing track of the conversation and stressing out, she shook her head; trying to quell the worries that had just flared up within her. "I hope so too, Master." she said simply, eating her soup a little bit more. "In other news," Claudia trailed, "Er, I do hope you haven't been stressing too much about my mission. As my Master, I know that this is a very important thing. I promise I'm going to try my best, and a little extra." Claudia stated, trying to keep the conversation going. However, she had such a hard time figuring out what to say to Obi-Wan at times. As polite and kind as he was, it was somehow difficult to figure out what to talk about. One of the reasons being, despite Claudia and him being Master and student, they knew virtually nothing about one another. That fact puzzled Claudia the most. They had been given seven years together, with pretty much nothing friend-ship wise to show for it.

[Master Obi-Wan]

"I stress all the time, Padawan. About many things too." Obi Wan said and it was true, he doesn't remember a time where his mind wasn't stressed about one thing or the other. "I am certain you are going to do your best. Duchess Kryze is a very nice lady." Obi Wan didn't have any doubts about that. He has spent quite a lot of time with her when he was younger, shame he had to leave it all behind. "She has a son about your age." Obi Wan added. remembering seeing the boy in his visions. He had an odd feeling about the boy. During one encounter he had with Satine, they spoke about it very briefly. They spoke about how Satine had to get married to some rich business man, very soon after the two of them had to part ways. After that he hasn't heard from her in nearly fifteen years. Obi Wan hopes her marriage is happy and that the boy is happy too. "Perhaps you can befriend a Marquess." Obi Wan suggested, finishing his glass.

[Captain Plucky]

He stresses...all the time? How is that even possible? Claudia drew her head back, eating once more before continuing the conversation. I, myself, can worry a lot. But becoming anxious at every single moment of your life? That sounds a lot like Vokem. "I somehow can't help becoming tense when it comes to these things, though." she admitted, wondering for a moment if she was revealing too much about herself, or if she was showing too much emotion. It was so hard to tell at times. "I always seem to imagine the worse-case scenario, and latch onto it. I guess I worry that, if I don't plan for the worst thing, it's going to happen." she paused shortly, breathing out softly. "Just like this mission. I guess I didn't stress enough." Claudia's tone was solemn, her expression neutral; yet self-loathing sparkled brightly in her grey eyes. She laughed quietly, setting her empty bowl down. "I believe I got off of topic, though. I apologize, Master." With a weak smile, the Padawan swept her long brown hair behind her, resting it on her back. "I find it very interesting that the Duchess has a son. Hopefully, we will be able to enjoy each others company." she said, gazing off into the distance. Alright, that's one more person I have to protect. A duchess's son...what a incredible responsibility I have. Subtly, subconsciously, Claudia's left hand tensed up; forming a fist. She felt herself grow irritated at the idea of failure. Her nervousness had quickly shifted into anger. I swear by the force, I won't let another life slip through my fingers. I'm going to protect everyone this time, even if it costs me my own life!

[Master Obi-Wan]

"I am sure you two will. I know the Duchess quite well so I am certain she raised her son in her own image." Obi Wan said as he placed the glass on the small table."No need to apologise for going off topic." Obi Wan commented, there was no real topic to begin with. "Besides, stress is something you shouldn't focus on, nor the worse case scenario outcomes." Obi Wan added. "If you tell yourself only about worse case scenario and failure, you will make yourself believe that you are useless and can't do anything right. Always hope for the best, balance your inner self. That way you believe in yourself that you can do it and then the force will believe you can do it." Obi Wan knew the harsh truth about worse case scenarios, they always came to him. Only his mother taught him not to focus on the negatives because in every negative there is a positive. There is always a balance.

[Captain Plucky]

Wow, that's actually fantastic advice. It's like I've been setting myself up for failure, even before my mission starts. It makes a lot of sense. Claudia drew her head back, anger subsiding as she listened to Obi-Wan's lax, yet exact and well-pronouncing tone. The force was always strongly nearby his side, dancing around him like a bored cat would it's toys'. If Claudia concentrated, she could always get a good laugh and warm feeling from her chest at the way the force always takes care of Obi-Wan. How she could sense it passing by him quickly, twirling and entwining with him, only to jump and hop a few paces away before resting for a moment seemingly on his lap; then continuing it's constant shifts of movement. While I don't think I'm the best and telling things about the force, I can tell it loves Obi-Wan a lot. I hope it will help me like that someday. With the way this war is heading, I think I'm going to need it. The Padawan's smile melted into one that was more pleasant and sincere, and not as forced. She exhaled loudly, letting some pressure go with the excreted air. "I truly appreciate it when you talk to me, Master." she said, "You know so many more things than me, and are very wise. I know that..." Claudia paused, wondering if she should keep talking, even with the risky next words in mind. I don't really know if he'll take these next sentences the wrong way, but...maybe I should try to see how he reacts to it. I've never, EVER tried to say something like this before. I, shamefully, kind of want to see what happens.. Biting her lip, Claudia finally decided to speak the blunt truth. "Well, I know that you're normally very unresponsive to my compliments; like you always just skim over them like a unimportant part in a meeting. But, even if you don't respond, I don't mind. I just hope you realize that I really mean what I say. I'm not telling you these things because I want special Padawan Points in your eyes, no. I'm speaking what I really think, and that being that you're a very nice person. You're a fantastic warrior, and a logical thinker. I always mean my compliments. I wish that I can become strong like you when I get a more important rank as a Jedi." she explained, worried that she talked for too long. How will he react? Did I say something the wrong way? Oh, I can't tell. Darn it.

[Master Obi-Wan]

Obi Wan was speechless for several moments, he hasn't got a sincere compliment since the day his Master died, all those years ago back on Naboo. Just around fifteen years ago. "Wow." he took a pause. "I really appreciate that." he said, reflecting on what he was told. "I am sorry if I do not express my gratitude and you wish I did. It is just..." he didn't know how to say this without revealing anything he wished never to relive or think about "...things happened and then the Jedi Order happened." Obi Wan knew that was a terrible way to phrase it. Despite him being the negotiator, in situations such as this one, where no weak minded politician need to be fooled or persuaded into a peace treaty. "That was a terrible explanation." he let out a small sincere chuckle, not his usual faked ones, at his previous phrasing, and then said: "I never used to be allowed to show my emotion nor am I to this day. Therefore, I keep my reactions and responses as professional as I can and I am sorry to hear that my actions have offended you."

[Captain Plucky]

"I can understand that you're a little uncomfortable about talking about that event, but that's okay. I can admit that, despite my life hasn't met it's worst parts, we all have past events that we never want to speak of again. I'm just thankful that we can talk realistically like this. It's been more than an eternity since we've really spoke about our opinions like this." Claudia put a few of her fingertips to her lips, laughing along quietly to Obi-Wan's words. It was very relieving to hear her Master be honest for once, despite how broad his explanation was for his niche responses. "I-I know, right?" she replied to his last sentence, "I get so confused on what to feel at times. As Jedi, we're not supposed to show much emotion. And yet, Master..." Claudia looked up, eyes glazed over. "We are still human. And humans feel things, no matter how much we try to bottle it up or stop it." she stated. "And yet, I still become guilty over things I can't control, like natural emotional outbursts; or something in my sight crossing the line of good. If I can push my opinion a little further, please; I just don't think that's fair." Claudia wasn't sure if she had talked too much, but it felt so good to get things off of her chest.

[Master Obi-Wan]

Obi Wan let everything skin in. "No. No it isn't fair." he agreed. "But then again not many things in the Universe are fair." He added, thinking back to his father who used to shout and hit him for things he didn't do or things he slightly messed up on. "I have lived long enough to understand and accept the inequality. There is simply nothing to be done about it. There will always be rule that forbiden one thing or another. And people that..." He didn't finish his thought, he couldn't bring himself too. Instead deciding to change the topic slightly. "Perhaps it would have been much better if you had a different Master not me. Maybe Grandmaster Yoda or Master Windu, who would have taught you far better then I have, to let go of your emotions and accept the galaxy for what it is." concluded Obi Wan. 'Not a broken Master like me'. He wanted to add but he couldn't bring himself to, so the statement just hung in the air between the two.

[Captain Plucky]

It was nice that Obi-Wan didn't try to defend the Jedi rules. That he explained why it wasn't fair, and could see eye-to-eye with Claudia on the subject of emotions. Finally, she could talk to someone with a little more edge in her voice, an edge and concern that she normally refrained from showing. While it didn't seem like she was talking too much out of line, Claudia was an incredibly polite person. She never spoke with any feeling, unless something had upset her. To let out some of those opinions with someone who simply agreed, it felt good. To her, the little frustration that she let out felt like an entire Siths worth. As Obi-Wan stopped talking on the subject, she subtly and slightly slit her eyes in curiosity. I can get why he changed the subject. I've had to change conversations suddenly like that, mostly because I would have to talk about Vokem if I continued. She acknowledged. "Master..." Claudia trailed, hearing Obi-Wan's self-loathing. She furrowed her brow, remembering that he didn't take compliments too seriously. And, if he really felt bad about himself, then trying to tell him that he was a good Master would only make it worse. This seems like a really touchy topic. But, I know I can navigate through it. After a few minutes in thought, she finally decided what to say. "I can see why you don't hold yourself in a very good light, and why you think I'd be better off with someone else. But, not even GrandMaster Yoda and Master Windu are perfect. They have flaws, just like you and me." she began, "Just because you don't have as much skill as them, or because you aren't as detached from emotions, that doesn't make you any less of a Jedi. And, that doesn't make you any less of a Master to me. You just have a different way of reacting to things, but that's okay. Your way of responding to stressful situations is what makes you a good Jedi in your own way, and in a way that others respect. Yes, I may be better off with those two Masters, but we shouldn't become spiteful towards each other or ourselves because of that. We should just be happy with one another, and what we have. And, together..." Claudia took a dramatic pause, making eye contact with her Master. "We can rebuild one another, and become better Jedi than before. That's what Master's and Padawan's do."

[Master Obi-Wan]

"What you are saying is very wise, Padawan." said Obi Wan, keeping the eye contact for a little longer. It is not like he lacked knowledge, strength or control compared to other Masters it is that he is unable to let go of what happened to him. Those things, drag him back into past, every night. His mothers words echoed in his head: "Sometimes we put up walls. Not to keep people out, but to see who cares enough to knock them down." Obi Wan felt like he was in that state right now, that his mother described when she was explaining how Ori never left her side. The conversation Claudia and Obi Wan were having almost seemed like a replica of what his mother told him about Core and him. Core was always curious to know more about Obi Wan, and Core made Obi Wan open up to things, even himself but his father always shut him down and out. Obi Wan realized that he was silent for several seconds now and decided to break the silence once again that seemed to stretch and coil around them. "I appreciate this." he finally spoke.