Hey, this is The Hatter+The Hare looking for a one on one. Well, I'd love to say that I am the outgoing girl that everyone loves, but, I can't. And I can't write about myself very well. So, let's change my name to Mikey and make me a male. Here is what Mikey is like;
Mikey would be described as being an introvert i.e; He is shy and guarded around strangers. He tends to lash out with harsh words after long periods of holding in his complex feelings-this being a result of feeling that no one would understand or care. Generally, he is well focused in classes and excels in most subjects, but out with classes he prefers to cause mayhem-though nothing that could get him into serious trouble-and enjoys pranking others. He is generally a sensitive person, taking everything to heart unless it's an obvious joke, though he tries to keep a calm exterior. Usually, if someone insults him, Mikey will bite back with something equally as wounding-though he doesn't enjoy doing this as it gives people the wrong impression of him. He tries to keep up an I-Don't-Care façade, even though it internally scars him-this being known as he can recall every insult that has ever been directed at him. In spite of all of this, once someone gets to know him fully and he trusts them, Mikey is actually rather talkative and quirky. He is not afraid to voice his opinions on something and is not afraid to show who he truly is. He feels that he will not change for anyone, and will continue to be who he truly believes he is. Another thing to add to Mikey's personality, is that he is incredibly spontaneous. One minute he is calm and collected, the next is hyper and spouting random quotes, "I'm in a RAAAGE. Really mad." and "Go throw your TV out a hotel window!" being prime examples of this-though neither used in a serious context. Many would perceive Mikey as being, for want of a better word, a nutter. They would see him as this due to the many crazy things he has said and done, running to his friend and yelling,"Chocolate murderer!", turning on a light and whispering,"Lumos.", opening automatic doors with"Alohamora!", lining doorways with salt to prevent ghosts from entering the room, always having rock salt on him-in case he has to draw a protective salt circle around himself-writing a song about 'Nomping' feet and drawing a home-made Dark Mark on his arm being prime examples of thus. Of course, he CAN be sane when he wants to be he's not mental. He's just a special personality. Another reason that he would be perceived as odd is because he refers to himself as a 'Killjoy'-something not many understand the true meaning of. It simply means that he likes the band My Chemical Romance. No, is obsessed with them. Also, he uses his motto's "Art is the weapon, and the world is our canvas!" and "There would be less violence in the world f everyone used Hula Hoops." often.
Examples of my writing when I'm left for long enough-These are stories which I'm beginning to write. One of these would take me a minimum of half an hour.
Memories wrote:A gunshot. The sound of a body crashing to the ground. A scream. Arms wrapped protectively around my waist as I struggled towards the body, screaming as I went. This couldn't be happening. It had to be a dream. Words were whispered in my ear, but my hysteria was too much. I couldn't hear them. [b]"Mikey! No!" I screamed, for what seemed like the hundredth time. But my words were incoherent due to the tightness of my throat. He can't be gone. I refuse to believe it. I hear my name being called. The tone of the voice is clearly one of worry.
"Gerard, I-I-"My voice is constricted from the lump in the back of my throat. A finger presses lightly to my lips and along with it comes the soothing voice I've been longing to hear for so long.
"Lauren Lynsay Iero."The familiar voice whispers softly."You do not have to explain yourself to me. I know what you're going through. Listen-No, don't interrupt-just listen to me. Mikey would not have wanted you to spend your days living in the past. He wants you to move on-No, not to forget him.That's not what I'm saying. He wants you to live your life. I know, you were closer to my brother than I ever was, and I seriously regret that. But, I know for a fact that he would have wanted you to be happy. Please Laurie, at least put on a brave face. For Mikey."
"Overkill mate."I hear my brother, Frank, sigh from the other side of the room as I break down in further tears on Gerard's chest. He's right though. I'm hurting myself over the past. Mikey would never forgive me for that. I can't help it though. Ever since it happened, I've been...Well, to put it in the nicest possible way, a train-wreck.
"Laurie, you need to understand that it's not your fault."Gerard whispers. But I can't. It was my fault. If I'd just stopped him from getting in the way... But then, he'd be n my position. And he deserves so much better than that.
"It is my fault Gerard!"I whimper, though I don't have the energy to pull away from him."If I'd stopped him...He didn't have to take that bullet for me. And you, you could have stopped him! Instead to kept me out of the way like I was some little child!"
"That's because he asked me to Laurie!"Gerard snapped harshly in return. His words stung and, by the dramatic softening of his expression, he knew it."Laurie, he asked me to protect you from anything. He begged me to keep you out of harms way. He told me he'd never forgive me if I didn't take care of you if something happened to him." I stared at him, my eyes clouded with a mixture of pain, disbelief and, surprisingly, compassion. Ever since it had happened, Gerard had been there for me and, yeah, I felt something for him. But what I felt for him, was nothing compared to what I felt for Mikey. My Mikey. Fresh tears form in my eyes as I recall the days when he'd hold me close, and whisper in my ear about how terrible his day had been. I remember feeling sad hearing about it, until he got to the part, my favourite part, where he whispered that seeing me again had made it all better. He said it like nothing in the world mattered apart from me. And maybe, just maybe, that's truly how he felt. It had to be. I refuse to believe other wise.
The faint sound of my phone ringing, snapped me back to reality. I blushed, realising all eyes were on me. "Sorry."I mumbled, dashing out of the Lecture Theatre. This call was bound to be important. I knew it, because that ringtone was the one I set for Mikey. The song he sang to me. Our song.
"Mikey?"I call desperately, as I click the 'receive' button on my phone."Mikey! What's wrong? Are you okay?"
"Laurie, calm down." That familiar, soothing voice laughs from the other end.
"Michael James Way, if you think it's funny worrying me sick-"
"Laurie, listen! I wanted to ask something. I wanted to ask i-if you'd b-be-" His sweet, angelic voice was interrupted by the annoying groan of my brother, telling him to, 'Just freakin' ask her'.
"Ask me what?I request patiently, picking at my nails as I cradle the phone between my ear and shoulder.
"Wouldyoudomethehonourofbeingmygirlfriend?" Surprisingly, I managed to decipher the jumble of run-together words. This called for a squeak. And squeak I did.
"Yes, yes, yes! Yes times infinity! Twice!"
I Do wrote:“There was a moment in my life when I really wanted to kill myself. And there was one other moment when I was close to that. . . . But even in my most jaded times, I had some hope.”
"Oww! No! Ah, yes!" I grunt, trying desperately to free myself from my mother's grasp. "Yes, I'll visit! On holidays! No, not every weekend! Once a month?! Fine, deal!" I pry myself away from her, gladly seeing that she has managed to contain the waterworks. Knowing smiles are thrown in direction as I trudge towards Windsor house. And it doesn't take long to figure out why. Even at the rate I realise what the smiles mean, it's far too late for me to do anything. It's not as if they are going to call it off. Charlie obviously approved if they-Wait, didn't Charlie end up in hospital because of the twins? And that made Blaine the acting prefect? Too busy being a homework worshipping coffee god to bother about sparing me? Crap. It's official. I'm doomed. I reach for the door handle, but a firm hand pulls me back. I twirl around, one perfect blonde eyebrow arched, but I instantly relax when I see the familiar face of my room mate, Russell.
"Russ!"I smile, though something about his smirk unsettles me."Russ...What's going on? What are they planning?" My room mate merely shakes his head and hands me a pair of the goggles we usually use in Science before walking away. Perplexed, I toss the goggles away before kicking open the doors to Windsor. I barely have time to ponder over the emptiness of the entrance hall as I step inside before a freezing liquid pours over my head. Instinctively, I flail and attempt to shield my hair with my hands. But it's too late for that. I brave a glance down at my uniform, clasping my right hand over my mouth to muffle the sob that comes right before my knees giveway. On the ground, I huddle in a ball. Well, more like I curl into the fetal position.
"Told you we'd get you back for ratting us out last year." A cheerful voice calls from the stairs.
"Told YOU he wouldn't take it well, David!" Another voice snaps, before footsteps rush closer to me.
"Wes, he's fine. Just being dramatic. We didn't physically harm him!" David retorts, though I can hear the concern in his voice. I realise why he's concerned. Tears. I've been crying. Always was his weakness. I stare into the fuzzy haze that I continually slip into. That's what happens when I'm in a state of hysteria. Just a fuzzy, purple haze. It's better this way, anyway. The doctor says that if I allow myself to slip into this haze, this stage in my life will pass swiftly without the help of medication. As if. It'll never happen, though I daren't tell him that. A hand waving infront of my eyes causes me to slip back into a fuzzy sense of reality. It's only now that I feel the arms around me. Cradling me like a small child. I know who they belong to, though. If it was anyone else, they would't have touched me. They know how I react. His voice whispers in my ear. Two simple words.
"I know." And then silence. The voice, which belonged to Wes, speaks loud enough for our two companions to hear now.
"Jeff?" His voice is soft, but there is no denying the pain in it. "Jeff, sweetie, you need to listen to me." His voice begins to shake as fingers brush along my cheek, and I know he's moments away from bursting out in tears. I feel guilty. I know I'm the cause of his pain. A sharp intake of breath makes me relax as I believe it to be my friend ready to continue. But it's not. It's our companions. And I realise why seconds before it happens. Hot lips press against mine. I make a mental note to thank my friend for his sexuality. He must have known crossing my personal space line would snap me to full attention. However, as could be expectd, I don't thank him immediately. Infact, I do the opposite. I recoil and sob loudly, fear shining in my eyes. I hate being touched. And he knows it. Despite my uncontrollable sobbing, a small smile manages to form on Wes' lips as he begins to cradle me again.
"I thought you told me to listen." I whimper, pushing past my own boundaries as my head falls against his chest.
"like you would have." His voice replies, and I can almost hear his smirk form as he caresses my hair. It's strange, our relationship. Normally, if someone so much as claps a hand on my shoulder or brushes against my arm by mistake in the corridor, I'll freak out. It's not optional of course. More like a natural reaction set off by triggering painful memories.
"Jeff?" It's impossible to miss the worry in Wes' voice."Jeff, are you still with us?"
"Yes. I'm not some drugged up kid that could die at any moment." I snap, though no one seems to mind.
"Hush Jeff." Wes teases. There's something in his voice. Something that I can't quite place.
'Ah, but you can.' A snide voice whispers in my mind.
"I can't." I snap back, unaware that I'm voicing all of this. "And I'm tired. of this. Of you always thinking you're right. Of the fact that my own thoughts know better than me!" I'm crying again, too overwhelmed by my own thoughts to notice the glances being exchanged between Wes, David and his twin, Thad.
"I'm sorry." A voice whispers, and I barely have time to register who says the words before a hand clamps over my mouth. I guess it's to stop me from screaming. I want to, but I can't. The haze is back. It's frightening, how little the haze bothers me. I'll happily stare into it until I fall asleep or am roused from it by someone. But this time, I fell asleep.
That Day{Skip over if you dislike coarse language.} wrote:That day was just like any other. I got up an hour later than I should, I broke my alarm, I yelled at my friend, I got ready, I went to lessons. Of course, I didn’t have to do any of these things. But, as Mr. Watt always says, “No one can make you do anything, but, there are always consequences.” Yeah. Mr. Watt. He’s a little odd. Honestly, he acts all serious but then he goes and says or does something crazy. Of course, he knows what he’s saying. I mean, a twenty four year old male saying, “I don’t like my banana’s when they’re not quite ripe and still hard in the middle.” Has to know what he’s saying. He tells us stories, too. I thought RE would be so boring. It’s my favorite subject now. Anyway, that’s not the point. I wake up an hour later than I should, because I always ignore the alarm on my phone. You wouldn’t want to wake up if you had ‘Kiss Me’ blaring in your ear at seven AM either. Then, I break my alarm clock that’s set to wake me up at eight AM for the one reason that it’s an annoying BEEEP BEEEP sound. I then progress a little, and yell at my friend/room mate for telling me to get a move on. I don’t CHOOSE to be a lazy grouch in the mornings. It would help if the school provided food after seven-thirty. I then proceed to get ready in my Dalton uniform. As usual, I send Nick out of the room. Sure, I like him, but, really now? I’m pretty sure he’s 100% straight. Or, at least, he thinks that I am. Or not, since I’m, like, totally obviously gay. Then, I go meet my un-naturally morning people friends, and head to classes. That day was a Thursday. Guess what I had after Form Class? Yup, RE. Man, I loved that subject.
In Form Class, I took my usual seat in between Blaine and his sappy little boyfriend, Kurt. Like hell was their little relationship preventing me from sitting down. Or maybe it was. I swear, it’s unnatural how they managed to hold hands behind the seats. Eventually, I agreed to swap seats with Kurt, leaving me beside Nick. Fantastic. Anyway, the class was only ten minutes long, as it is every morning, and it went by in a flash. As it did every morning. Unfortunately, our stupid teacher, Mr. McMenemy held us back to discuss the auditions for our brand new Glee Club, entitled ‘The Warblers’. What a stupid name. What did they want us to do; Sing Katy Perry songs and sway along to the beat whilst watching Blaine eat up the solos with his tear-jerking dapper voice of gold? Apparently, yes. Well, we had to try out first. But that’s what happened anyway. Anyway, the auditions were being held at lunch. So, we all had to miss out on food to sing some songs? I’m in!
We were eventually enabled to leave the class and head to RE. Mr. Watt greeted us casually, watched the immature boys that were David and Wes with a vulture-like look, and ordered us to sit down. As usual, Blaine and I took the piss out of him and stayed standing, He laughed lightly as usual, before quite literally dragging us right to the front of the class.
“Are you going to make them walk into a table again?” A boy, Ryan Ingles, called out, before quickly being silenced by the death glare the both of us gave him.
“No, I’m going to show you what it’s like to be ignored.” Mr. Watt had replied, causing us to realize that it pissed him off when we didn’t respond to his greeting.
“Piss.” I whispered to Blaine, receiving a slap on the back of the head from Mr. Watt.”Sorry. Bat hearing. I forgot.”
“Sorry? Did you lot hear something? Ooh, look! A mobile phone lying on a table!”
“NO DON’T YOU DARE TOUCH MY PHONE!” I squealed, silenced by Mr. Watt’s repeated question.
“Here, have the back Kurt.” He’d smiled, handing Kurt the back of my precious phone. “And a battery for you Nick.” Nick took my battery, smirking as he pocketed it, Then, the sim card was handed to an evil looking David. The rest of the phone was thrown across the class to James.
“God James, if you break my phone, I’ll end your life! Mr. Watt, please piece my phone back together and give it back!”
“Sorry? I didn’t catch that. Nick, did you say something?”
“Nope. I did not sir. Why? Did you hear that annoying noise too? Was it you David?”
“No, it was not Nick. James? Ryan? Kurt?”
“No. I believe it might have been Darren.”
“As do I.”
“Ditto.”
“JUST GIMME BACK MY PHONE BEFORE I SLOWLY END ALL OF YOUR LIVES!”
There was a chorus of laughter from the class, this including Blaine who’d stayed quiet through the whole ordeal, and I slunk over to my seat, face bright red. Damn it all to hell and back. I was never living this down. All pieces of my phone were returned to me and pieced back together by Mr. Watt. I hugged the electronic device to my chest, a protective look on my face.
“Protective much?” Wes smirked.
“Go burn in the righteous fires of hell.” I snapped, glaring at all of my friends. I proceeded to ignore them for the rest of the lesson, despite their many apologies. They touched my phone, and now they would suffer.
Our next lesson was PSE-Personal and Social Education. The walk there was anything but enjoyable. Wes and David had latched onto my left side Kurt and Blaine were walking together like some sort of conjoined snail, Nick was behind me-and the undapper thoughts that I thought at that were awful-and James, Darren and Ryan were at my right side.
“Just shut the f*ck up about the phone thing!” I finally snapped, before pulling myself away from them and storming up to room 302. I stomped into the classroom and all but threw my bag under my desk, ignoring the looks I was receiving from the incredibly punctual Stuarts,
“That time of the month Sterling?”The familiar voice of William Addison sneered, causing me to visibly stiffen. “I was unaware that they admitted girls into Wallace. This is an all boys school after all.”
“I was unaware that little b*stards like you weren’t killed at birth, Addison. Oh, isn’t that a Stuart tradition? To admit the nastiest little pr*cks alive into such a prestigious school?” That shut him up. I sat down at my desk, completely ignoring Nick’s existence when he sat beside me.
“Jeff, please let it go. We were just teasing. Don’t take it to heart.” He said quietly, a hint of guilt lingering in his voice.”Is there something else wrong Jeff?”
“Nick Duval, You know exactly what else is wrong with me, even if it takes you a while to realize it.” He stared at me in confusion, sighing quietly when I turned my attention towards out teacher, Mrs. Lee. The register was called and, after both my and Nick’s names had been called, I turned to the frustrated boy beside me.
“Look Nick, I’m sorry, but you know how much that phone means to me. And you and I both know that my mood’s not exactly been the best.”
“Yes, sweetie.” Nick nodded, causing my heart to flutter.”I know how much it means to you. It’s your last memory of him, after all. But, darling,” My heart fluttered again. “live and let die. Now, Jeff, I really don’t know what’s wrong with you. All I know, is that it sounds a hell of a lot like minor depression, Go to the counselor. He’ll help babe.” damn it. Why did he have to do this to me?
"First of all, I am not depressed. I'm not. There's no way on this earth am I depressed. Secondly, i'm not going to the counselor. I hate him and his stupid way-too-caring persona."
"Jeff, Face it, you're depressed."
"I'm not."
"You are."
"No, I'm not."
"Yes, you are."
I turned back to the front, wearing a steely expression. I heard him sigh, but I ignored him. The lesson was a slow one, speaking only about what you can do if you're feeling pissed off, harmful, depressed or suicidal. Wait-what? Was this old bat reading my mind?
Scars wrote:"Jeff?" My fingers clamped around the fresh wounds on my arm at the voice.
"J-just a minute!" I called back shakily, stuffing the razor blade into my pocket and pulling my sleeve down. I rushed over to the door and unlocked it, pulling it open to reveal a worried Nick.
"Hey-Oh my god! There's blood on your sleeve Jeff!"
"It's nothing, just a cut." I replied quickly, brushing off his concern.
"Right...Yeah, sorry. Uh, I just wanted to know if you wanted to go for coffee with me? It's fine if you don't! I just wanted to ask, because I didn't want to go alone...Or without you. I was going, but I didn't want to be alone and-" My lips caught his. God, my adorable boyfriend really got on my nerves sometimes. He kissed back roughly, pushing me forward and kicking closed the door. A soft moan left my lips as he pushed me against the wall. Some how, he'd already unbuttoned my shirt. Where did he learn this stuff?! My hands fumbled with his shirt, as he slid mine off.
"Jeff!" he gasped, grabbing my wrist.
"I told you, it's just a cut!" I insisted.
"Yeah, a self inflicted one." Nick added, looking hurt. I shook my head and pushed him away.
"Just go." He left immediately, and I locked the door behind him. Before pulling out the blade, I glanced down at my scarred body with disgust. Holding the blade tightly, I inflicted another wave of pain across my body as the blade dug into my arm. I sat down on my bed and cradled by arm, body racked with sobs. I closed my eyes, drifting off to sleep.
I wake up to a loud pounding on my door and the worried calls of my friends. I ignore them. if they want in, they can damn well get the Tweedles. I dig the blade across the crease of my elbow. I'd cut here many times before, but never had it been this excruciatingly painful. I let out a strangled cry as the blood pours from the wound.
"Nick!" I managed to scream, my vision beginning to gradually blur and darken. No reply. Then I remember that I hurt him, and he probably hates me. My vision turned black and no sound is omitted when I try to scream. I now know that I'd blacked out.
My eyes open again, and arms instantly wrap around me-Shielding my eyes fro the unbelievably white room.
"Jeff! Oh, Jeff! I thought I'd lost you!"
"Nick!" I cry, returning the embrace. "Oh, Nick, I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to hurt you!"
"Shh... You never hurt me Jeff." Nick whispered, stroking my hair as sobs rack my body once more. "I've got a surprise for you darling."
"What is it?" I sniffed, taking the small package he handed me-despite the searing pain in my arm.
"Open it, and you'll see. But, don't use your arm. it'll rip the stitches."
I nod, using only my right hand to open the tiny package. A smile graces my pallid lips as I look at the familiar badge. "You got me transferred to Windsor?"
"Better than that, i got you as my room-mate."
"That's great and all, but where am I?"
"Reed's room. I had to promise I'd put you in the safest place possible. It's just for just now though. You'll be with me soon."
I nod, holding him tightly.
"I'm sorry."
"It's not your fault Jeff." Nick whispered."But, I'm not letting you hurt yourself again. I'm going to help you through this. On one condition. you tell me why you inflicted each and every wound upon yourself. Starting with that one on your side."
"I tried to kill myself." I said casually, clearly not fazed by his pathetic attempt at getting information out of me. Nick stare at me in horror, choking slightly."
How-how could you even do that to yourself?" He cried.
"Easily." I retorted simply. "When you're me, it's all you want to do."
"You stupid idiot! You are amazing! The sweetest guy I've ever known! Stop it! Stop believing those stupid homophobes!"
First Kiss, and Fighting wrote:"Blaine?" I look up, hearing my name. I'm greeted by Kurt's worried face and the eyes of my entire Science class on me. "Are you alright?" I shake my head, breathing quick and shallow. My vision is blurred from tears and it takes all of my strength not to break down.
"Look's like the queer's afraid of blood!" A jock sneers. My stomach constricts and I mutter a quick 'Excuse me' before standing and fleeing the room. Once out of the class, I allow the tears to flow freely as I slide down the wall next to the door. It takeds every ounce of strength I own to keep down the contents of my stomach.
"Blaine?" I jump at Kurt's voice. He kneels down beside me and wraps a comforting arm around my shoulders. "Blaine, what's wrong? I know it's more than just that sheep." I choke, unable to speak.
"Blaine, you can talk to me. I want to help." Whatever it is about these words, really helps me.
"It's f*cking terrifying Kurt!" I cry, trembling as I pull up my shirt to reveal a scar running from my hip diagonally to just under my chest. "The blood, I can handle. I'm fine with the content. It's just the knife."
"My god..Blaine! What happened?" I let out a strangled sob, shaking my head.
"Tell me!"
"I can't!" I pull away from him and stand, tears dripping down my cheeks. " I can't!"
"Blaine!"
"Just leave me alone Kurt!" I make to leave, but Kurt grabs my arm and slams me against the wall.
"Listen here Anderson," He snarls, pinning me painfully against the wall. "You are not showing me something like that and then leaving! You think I don't care! You're wrong Blaine!" I cut him off by crashing our lips together. My hands lock around his wrists and I slam him into the lockers, lips barely breaking contact with his. As the bell sounds, I tear away from him-ignoring the horrified stares of other students- and leave him standing, shocked. I burst out of the school, pulling out my phone as I do so. 'I'm sorry." I send to Jeff, sniffing as I imagine how he must feel. I've left him at Dalton, and broke my promise in one day. He made me promise not to hurt myself. But, I'm sitting here in my car cutting my arms, and I've upset Kurt. Double Whammy.
I will do;
(Bolded +Underlined are the ones I wanna do the most)[/b]
I'd really like to try a RolePlay based off the British show, The Inbetweeners.
Glee
Dalton(As in, based around teh Fanfiction)
Glee |Romance at mcKinley.
Glee |Kurt x Blaine(Klaine)
Glee |Jeff x Blaine(Bleff)
Glee |David x Wes(Wevid)
Glee| Jeff x Nick(Neff/Niff/three-six)
Glee| Kurt x Blaine with breakups and Logan. 'Nuff said.
Glee |Kurt x Logan
Glee | Logan x Julian(Jogan)
Glee |David x Wes x Puck(Duckley)
(See the bolded ones? We could try a full RP of those.)
What I won't do;
Normal Teens (unless they are in one of the above, like Romance)
One liners
Full Lovey Dovey Stuff
Slave Roleplays.
Thank you and I look forward to RPing with one of you![/i]
