𝓦𝓱𝓸 𝓚𝓲𝓵𝓵𝒆𝓭 𝓙𝓸𝓷𝓪𝓽𝓱𝓪𝓷 𝓙𝓸𝓷𝒆𝓼? | Accepting

[querencia]

ＣＡＭＩＬＬＡ
♕ the queen bee . 19 . birom asexual . tagged; open!! ♕

camilla could not remember another time she had ever felt so awful. everywhere ached, her head, eyes, shoulders... she still couldn't believe he was gone. she opened her eyes when she felt sunlight start to shine onto her face, god, how long had she been sitting there? all she could remember was waking up from a nightmare, the first time she'd passed out after she'd gotten the news, and rushing to the bathroom sick. nothing had happened but the nightmare, despite how fast it had left her, left behind a haunting, nauseating feeling. so she had leaned against her bathtub, forehead pressed against the cool curved lip until well.. now.

getting up, camilla flicked on the lights and immediately regretted it. not only did it make her head hurt worse, but seeing herself was just sad. her eyes were so puffy, makeup streaked everywhere down her face, cheeks pale. with a soft groan she turned on the faucet and began her routine for the day, she couldn't hide in her room forever after all, no matter how tempting it was. by the end of it, her eyes were less red and the few days old makeup gone but when she looked at herself again, she couldn't stop her lip from wobbling and the tears from welling up. everything was such a nightmare. jonathan was gone. nothing could change that. her lover, no her ex, was gone and his body was going to be buried or burned or whatever the jones did. how could he be gone? everyone loved him so much so how could someone just.. murder him in such a.. violent fashion. with a frustrated sound that came out more pitiful than anything, she pressed her fists to her eyes and willed herself to stop, stop crying, stop shaking, stop everything. once she was more composed, she left the bathroom, the light of dawn filtered into the hall as she made her way back to her room.

after camilla finished getting dressed into the first things she found, a pair of leggings and a plain black cropped shirt, a big knitted sweater on top, she left the small house. the house was on campus but it was small, only holding herself and her three roommates and most days she loved it. but today all she wanted was to be as far from the school and the town as possible. she was lucky it was so early, she could barely face herself let alone her roommates or the crowd of students that would soon begin to emerge. she kept her head down, refusing to make eye contact with the few people she passed, knowing her own expression would be mirrored in theirs. would they even say anything to her? condolences for the ex of the deceased? she set her mouth in a hard line and she ducked into the main building before she let her mind wander down that train of though.

[Consulting_Angel]

Ashton Rouleau
19|Male|Homosexual
The Best Friend
Tagged: Open.

Ashton hid under his covers, ignoring his alarm. He didn't want to leave his room, let alone his bed, and would rather stay cocooned in the safety of his bedsheets than even put one foot to the outside world. He wanted to just go back to sleep, in the hopes that he was currently in a nightmare, and that when he wakes up, everything would be alright. Jonathan, his best friend, would still be alive, and they'd be meeting at the library still or something like they had planned. He stayed like that for about ten more minutes, contemplating whether or not he actually needed to attend college today. Maybe he'd get away with missing a full week. Maybe he could just... drop out. No, he couldn't do that. He was not a quitter, but the current situation made him doubt himself. He had to pull himself through it, he told himself. He was going to have to leave his apartment sooner or later anyway. But that didn't mean he was going to do it willingly or quietly.

He eventually moved, getting out of his bed, and walking to the bathroom. A glance in the mirror showed him that even his hair, which normally did have some 'bounce' to it was looking flat and sad. Though that might have been because he'd not had a shower yesterday, and his face was still a little blotchy. Ashton glanced at the clock, and hesitated. He'd still be able to make it to his first class, even if he was definitely going to be at least ten to fifteen minutes late. At least he'd show up, he supposed. Ashton stepped into the shower, taking a little longer than usual because he was still considering just going right back into bed. Finally, though, he left the shower and got dressed into a dark green t-shirt, blue jeans and a black and white plaid flannel shirt. He then dried his hair, running a comb through it a couple of times, and then gathered his things for his college classes. After he pulled his shoes on, he left his apartment, and went outside, walking through to the college campus.

Almost the exact moment he saw someone else - another student - they offered their condolences, which more upset Ashton more than comforted him. Sure, everyone knew that he and Jonathan had been extremely close - of course they had been, they'd been best friends for years - but hearing the condolences just made it more real, more set in stone. It hurt. Still, he only murmured a 'thanks' in response, not feeling like kicking off or making a fuss - for once. He still wanted to just go back to his apartment to hide in his bed for the rest of eternity. Ashton sighed inwardly, thinking about Jonathan, and everyone that might be connected to him in some way. Sure, people had motivations, but he couldn't think of a single person who would even go through with such a thing.

[monta,]

ａｒｌｏ
ａｄｉａｎｅ
mtf trans ♦ twenty ♦ the rejected
tags. open ♦ mood. drowsy, mournful
location. campus, near dormitory

indent[ ✖ ] — With a heavy sigh and equally heavy eyelids, Adiane pushed herself up as she woke to the sun streaming into her eyes through the large, lonely single window of her dorm room. Getting to her feet, she walked to the door of her single-bed dorm and walked out, still in her pajamas made up of grey sweatpants with various paint splatters and a dull red sweater, making her way to the communal bathroom that was just down the hall. After splashing a few handfuls of water on her face to wake her and brushing her teeth with the familiar minty paste, she returned to her dorm and put together what she hoped was a comprehensible outfit. She threw on an old, torn up pair of skinny jeans from a thrift store that, seeing as ripped jeans are considered a trend nowadays, would probably sell for more than what she bought them for. She paired these old, distressed jeans pairing this with a simple white tee that once had her high school's team name, "Warriors" scrawled across it in a dark green letterman font, most of the letters peeling off or gone altogether to spell what appeared to be "Warriors".
indentShe didn't bother looking into the mirror that hung on the back of her door to see how she looked. It was the same everyday, anyways: utterly normal. Running a hand through her black hair, she picked up the old duffel tote that held all her notebooks, various empty pens and a few mechanical pencils, along with a few textbooks and a single, small bag of doritos for snacking mid-class. It was still rather early, but she liked being early anyways, so she didn't hesitate when she stepped out of her dorm room and began walking down the hall. She tried to pay no mind to the lingering thought in the back of her mind: The one she once loved was dead. The one she tried to give up on was dead. She felt her eyes begin to water and knew that her pale face was beginning to heat and redden. Discreetly rubbing her eyes on her arm, she continued down the hallway towards the stairwell of the residence hall.
indentShe distracted herself from the mournful thoughts by counting every step she took. 79 from her dorm to the stairwell. 113 from her floor to the ground floor. 10 from the ground floor to the exit of the dormitory. She ignored the few other students that passed her, some travelling in packs and gossiping—or crying—among themselves, while others like her solemnly walked past, making their way around campus. She allowed her mind to wander from counting steps to wondering if she should go to work after classes, or just call in sick. She knew well enough that it'd be the talk of the town, and she wasn't sure if she could handle smiling while the people she served conspired about who killed Jonathan.

[Burning_Roses]

Julie Repature/Tech Investigator/Nineteen/Female/Pansexual/Tagged:Ashton

Julie Reparte swung her legs over the side of her bed slamming a hand on her alarm, she had been up late doing more research on the Jonathan case and today she was taking it to the college, she dragged her feet to the shower and to make coffee. She sat down after showering to dry her hair and sip her coffee. Sitting on her dresser was her bag, containing her laptop, phones, different kinds of lie detector nodes, and a few other electronic gizmos, she smiled, these things were like her children and just about her only friends. She stood going to her closet and pulling out a white button up shirt and black pants with a black belt, she changed and looked at her hair before grabbing a comb and yanking through it.
She grabbed her bag and walked down the sidewalk, as she walked towards the campus she noticed a familiar face from her studies of the suspects of the case, Ashton Rouleau, she approached him making haste as she stopped and tapped his shoulder, “Ashton Rouleau?” She was gonna play a role here hoping he didn’t know exactly who she was. “My name is Julie Reparte, I just wanted to offer condolences on the loss of your friend Johnathan” When she heard his mumbled thanks she gave a small smile, “Hey, they’re gonna find who killed him, I can assure you of that,” She patted his shoulder before pulling out a piece of paper and scrawling a number, “I’m here to talk anytime”

[year of the ox]

( ─ ✰ ＫＥＩＴＨ ＬＡＭ )
_______________________________________

homosexual• the last witness • tags ; camilla

as he continued making his way around the college, keith couldn’t help but notice the many different people and their sad expressions. sure, he had expected it but part of him hoped for a normal school day. he couldn’t help but feel bad, really, he knew he was being selfish for hoping normality in a time as this one. he also felt sad for all of those who were close to johnathan. his friends, his family, everyone around him who ended up being a victim indirectly. despite not having much experience with the grieving process (mainly due to the fact that nobody that was close to him died), keith imagined that it was anything but easy. he couldn’t inagine losing someone dear to him, not without feeling his own eyes tearing up. keith stopped himself before he would cry too, not wanting to do so in public. he wasn’t ashamed of crying, no, but he wasn’t much of a crier either, he was the type of person who would try to stay strong for others

trekking down the campus, keith noticed more and more solemn expressions. more and more people crying their eyes out. he wanted to help those people, at the very least give them a warm hug and give his condolences. on his journey, however, keith also overheard some disgusting conversations. people were conspiring on who the killer was, and he could hear them mentioning the names of people who were close to johnathan. it made keith furious. sure, he was aware that people wanted justice for johnathan but just the idea of these people gossiping and spreading rumours about those closest to johnathan was simply horrible in his eyes. not only that, but he couldn’t help but wince at the idea of any of the people mentioned overhearing the gossipers and feeling even more pained than they already were.

keith sighed and began speed walking towards the building, hoping to get away from the nasty gossipers as soon as possible. upon reaching the main building, he slowed down, walking at a normal speed once more. he made his way towards his first class quietly until he noticed camilla ahead of him. he knew that johnathan had broken up with her before his death, but he knew he would feel guilty if she only walked past her. keith jogged up to her, and sighed before he gently tapped her shoulder 'i know it may sound weird, but i wanted to say that i'm sorry for your loss, camilla,' keith spoke, looking down at the floor 'i'm not the best at condolences but i still wanted to say something'. keith paused for a second and looked up at her 'also, if you ever need anything, just find me, alright?'

[Consulting_Angel]

Ashton Rouleau
19|Male|Homosexual
The Best Friend
Tagged: Julie.

He'd nearly made it to one of the college buildings, where his first class of the day would be, when he felt someone tapping his shoulder, to get his attention. He turned around sharply, surprised, about to get annoyed, but he really couldn't let himself do that. He knew that he was probably a total mess - emotionally, anyway - but he felt a need to at least try his hardest to hide it until he was alone somewhere, where no one would be able to see or hear him. He didn't want anyone to know how badly he was hurting - which was a whole lot more than he was letting on now. Ashton blinked a couple of times in confusion, wondering how the young woman that was stood in front of him knew his name - he didn't recall ever seeing her before, which made him get a little suspicious. Most other people only knew him as 'Jonathan's best friend', or at the very most, as just 'Ashton'. And even so, he doubted that anyone would dare to try and start up a conversation with him, considering his current mood, and the fact that he knew he looked like he was probably going to start crying at any moment.

When the woman introduced herself to him, Ashton still looked quite confused, since he didn't recognise her name, nor did he still know why she was talking to him. Still, he mumbled a, "Thanks..." in response, even though it did nothing to help him. He wanted to correct her, because the way she had worded herself made it sound like they'd only been friends to him - not close best friends. He let it slide for now, though. He shifted his gaze towards the ground, without really knowing what else to do. It was becoming a bit much, a bit too real, to hear of how 'they' were going to find the murderer. He was still desperately holding onto the idea, the thought, that this was just a surreal nightmare, and he was going to wake up soon, even if it was slipping away from him quickly as reality began to set in. Ashton flinched away when Julie patted his shoulder, as if he got burned, because he'd only let Jonathan do that. He didn't want anyone else to place a hand on him, even if it was trying to be comforting. "Don't... don't touch me. Please." He said, quietly, looking back up towards Julie. He glanced towards the piece of paper, and he took it, folding it up and putting it into the pocket of his jeans. "...Okay." He said, even though he knew that he was just going to ignore and forget about the bit of paper, and just not talk.

[nevermind.]

◆ Diego Gali | ◆ 21 | ◆ Male | ◆ Bisexual | ◆ "The Older Brother" | ◆ Tagged: Open
The sunlight shining through from in between his curtains woke Diego.
He didn't want to get out of bed just yet, he wanted to stay under his covers dor just a bit longer.
There was something in the back of his mind, he felt like it was something urgent...
Sighing, he reached an arm out from under the warm covers to grab his phone from the nightsand next to his bed.
The phone's power cord was a little short, so he had to stretch his neck when he shot a glance at the time.
It was already 8:50 am and classes started at 9 am.
For some reason, his alarm hadn't gone off, he had overslept and now he was going to be late for classes!
Cursing under his breath, he immediately jumped out of bed, all the sleepiness suddenly leaving his body.
Today, he didn't have time to carefully put together an outfit, so he just rummaged through his closet and threw on the first things he could find. "This will have to do.", he thought to himself.
Next, he dashed to the bathroom to quickly brush his teeth. He didn't have time to eat, he would have to snack on something secretly in class.
As he was standing in front of the bathroom mirror, watching his reflection brush his teeth, he suddenly realized what it was that had been in the back of his mind since he had waken up...
Jonathan.
Little did he know that that one minute and thirty seconds he had gotten where he had forgotten about Jonathan would be the most peaceful moments in his life for months to come.
Jonathan was dead.
He spit out the tooth paste in his mouth into the sink and then he sat on the closed lid of the toilet seat right behind him. His knees had gone weak.
Yes, now he remembered.
They had found his body in the Crypt one day ago, he had been stabbed with a knife.
The week in which he had been missing had been horrible, yes, but at least there had been hope that maybe, he was miraculously still alive, who knows, but now... now he was dead, no doubt, never to return.
He got back up again to get his books and get going. He was definitely going to be late now, but it didn't really matter anymore, did it?
He wondered why they were even holding classes. What was the point? Nobody would be able to concentrate anyway, Jonathan had been known and would certainly missed by many.
His thoughts immediately went to his little sister, Camilla.
He wondered how she was doing. He would look for her on the campus and call her if he wouldn't find her there.
While walking towards the main college building, he couldn't help but notice all the sad faces around him.
Most of them probably didn't even know him personally, but nobody wanted to seem out of place.
Diego never actually liked Jonathan, mainly because he had treated his sister badly and broken her heart.
And to be completely honest, he wasn't too sad about his passing either.
But of course, he wouldn't show that.
He would just nod knowingly, sniffle and occasionally crack a sad smile when people mentioned his name.

[Burning_Roses]

Julie Reparte/Female/19/Tagged:Open

She pulled her hand back, “Look I know I seem odd but I need you to trust me, if anything comes up please call me. I’m here to help. I may be a good ally.” She rubbed her neck as she shifted her weight, back and forth,with a small smile she turned giving a wave and walked down the path her bag against her hip as she entered the school. She looked around at the people mentally sorting them by what she knew.

Those who didn’t matter to her case or mission were shoved to the side for now, those she needed to speak to and gather more information stayed fresh in her brain. Even the short conversation she had just had, had given her information about Ashton. It was like a puzzle the human mind and as much as she loved a good computer sometimes the mind was so much better! She knew exactly who to talk to as she walked down the hall, she looked down at her phone before turning a corner and running into someone

[querencia]

ＣＡＭＩＬＬＡ
♕ the queen bee . 19 . birom asexual . tagged; keith!! ♕

camilla had barely made it into the music department when someone tapped on her shoulder, causing her to jump slightly. she hadn't even heard whoever was behind her come up to her, too focused on not focusing on the people around her. god, she had really hoped to make it through the morning without anyone speaking to her. she paused momentarily, composing herself as much as she could before turning to face the person, keith, she realized. keith wasn't part of her social circle at all but she remembered who he was through a friend of a friend.

as keith spoke, camilla attempted a smile although she knew it was strained and broken. unconsciously her fingers began to tug at the end of her sweater, causing a string to come loose. all she wanted to do was run away but what kind of impression would that make to someone just trying to be nice? she forced herself to keep her gaze on the person before her, "i.. thank you, keith." she forced the words, her voice coming out more strained than usual. for some reason she hadn't expected anyone, let alone someone who is basically a stranger, to actually approach her about.. jonathan. "i don't know what to say, i-i didn't expect that," her voice trailed off and she could feel the tears welling up again and she briefly wondered if they would ever run out. "you're sweet, keith." she visibly swallowed, the idea if a someone who had little history with herself and the whole situation was tempting, "i might just take you up on that sometime."

[Dark Star]

ｒａｃｈｅｌ j o n e s
Female; nineteen; The Sibling
tagged; Adiane

Rachel was running. Her legs burned as she sped through the forest. Her lungs cried for relief as she gasped for air. Then, she was falling, having tripped over something. As she glanced down, she saw Jonathan, his eyes open wide in horror and his mouth gaping in a silent scream.
She woke up screaming, tears streaming down her face. The reality of the dream sunk in: he was really dead. He was dead and she couldn't do anything about it. How things had gone that far, she didn't know. She was scared. For the first time since birth, she was truly alone. A part of her felt like it was missing, having died with her brother. It was a horrible, stomach lurching pain that filled her very being.

Wanting to clear her head, she left her bedroom to take a shower. She was thankful that she stayed in her house instead of the dorms. She couldn't handle the stares she'd undoubtedly get. After her shower and breakfast, she did her makeup and dressed in her undeniably expensive clothes. She put on a stoic face and headed to school.

Upon arrival, she kept walking toward her first class. She didn't really pay any attention where she was going, so she ended up crashing into someone. Looking up with a slight glare in her eyes, she noticed it was Adiane. That girl used to be so after Jonathan, it was embarrassing. She still treated her like a normal person, though. "Sorry." was all she muttered. She gathered up her own things, her bag having ripped on impact. She was too tired for this.