My relationship isn't in the best condition. But no ones is. I want my relationship fixed, and I beleived my relationship has the potential to be fixed. But I don't know if that is possible anymore all I want is for a decent relationship. A man that cares, a guy that one day wants to settle and have kids with me. A man who wants to marry me. I love romance and spontaneity, thats all I want. Is it that hard? *sigh* I just want to be happy, happily married and settled with a family. With a man who will treat me right, open a door for me every now and then. Purpose romantic dates, hold my hand, make me feel happy when I am sad. Someone who wants to come home everyday to see me, and doesn't feel as though it is a chore. I know I'm not the easiest person to get a long with, I don't always say and do the right things... But I deserve to be happy to right? I want to make my boyfriend feel special. Like I am worth something to them, and I want someone worth something for me. Maybe my expectations are to high... Maybe I need a reality check. But I have faith that someday I will find that guy. With any luck I already have him, and I just need to find him inside the guy I'm with. But who knows... Its impossible to find a decent man in California anymore.
Eye Color::B A B Y . B L U E
Hair Color:: B L O N D E
Weight:: N I N E T Y - F I V E . P O U N D S
Height::F I V E . F O O T . T H R E E
Body:: S K I N N Y & F I T
Figure:: H O U R G L A S S
Complexion:: T A N N E D
I'm a skinny blue eyed blonde. My eyes are baby blue/icy blue. They are sweet and sparkle like a dream, my blonde hair is natural, my natural color is a darker brown with highlights, my colored preference is light blonde. I'm skinny, a little to skinny, but I have a nice body, toned in just the right places that I'm healthy, and I have an hourglass figure, with tanned skin thanks to sunlight, without sun, I am as pale as a ghost with a few freckles on my face that are only noticiable without makeup, and if you are very close up. Besically I am the sexual preference for all the sex offenders of the world, except I'm short. People aren't really attracted to the fact I'm 5'3 and weight 95lbs. But everyone has flaws, mine is just that I'm short, I fit into double zero sized pants, not sure how considering I have a fairly large rear end, but I'm not complaining, my chest is C cup, whoich I am content with, not to big not to small. Easy to dress up or down. I'm pleased with how I look, if I had the choice to geneticly change myself I would, but i will not change myself. I may have flaws, but so does everyone else. Perfect people are fake, and I am the farthest thing from fake. I'm original, I am me.
Friends:: A . F E W . N O T . M A N Y
Bestfriend:: O N E
Enemies:: A . L O T!
Arch Enemy:: O N E
Well I have a few friends, but I wouldn't really call them friends I really just have a lot of aqquaintences to be honest. I don't really play well with others. I don't like people, people don't like me. Get over it. I'm not a people person, and I sure as hell am not a people pleaser. If people have a problem with me, I don't care. I will tell them just where their oppinion can go. But I do have one friend who I would consider my best friends, she is always there for me. Has been since we were thirteen. Oh god... Going down memory lane. Its making me feel old. But my best friend's name is Kourtney. She is pretty much my look a like, we are practically identical. And it confuses the hell out of people. This is normally the spot in an explaination I would include a snicker and a smug grin of very dramatic memories. So imagine me snickering. When it comes to enemies, I have a lot of them, people tend to hate me. They meet me, they hate me. They get to know me, they hate me. But I don't care. Because I'm not fond of them either. So as far as I'm concerned... Screw them. But one person in particular is a person I can't stand and absolutely hates me. The two of us do not get along well by any means, and every time we see eachother I end up smashing her face into a concrete slab. My twin sister. The biggest and dumbest blonde you will ever come across.
Favourite Hobby:: D A N C E & A R T
Least Favourite Hobby:: S P O R T S
Likes:: A R T & D A N C E
Dislikes:: S P O R T S & P E O P L E
Phobias:: L A R G E . C R O W D S
Allergies:: C H O C O L A T E
Medical Problems:: L O N G . L I S T
I'm an artist, I specialize in photography, painting, and drawing, but anything artistic is something I am capable of. I hate sports, whether I am watching or playing, I hate them, yet I'm a dancer. People tell me all the time I hate certain sports not all sports in general. And I remind them I hate all sports but one. But dance is only a sport when it is competitive, and I do competitive dance. But I'm afraid of large crowds, not stage fright or anything like that, I have no problem being around large crowds, I just don't like being around a large group of people, I don't like people and it freaks me out a bit. People also enjoy informing I'm a freak for being deathly allergic to chocolate, like I can help it. But I don't really care, I have never liked chocolate. But aside from my deathly allergy I have a few more problems, like anger issues, rage problems, on and off depression, on and off anorexia, bipolar disorder, learning disabilitys... I'm just one great big bundle of problems.
Occupation:: A R T I S T & D A N C E R
Worker Level:: H A R D . W O R K E R
Hours of Work per Week:: E I G H T Y - F O U R
Worker View:: O V E R W O R K E D
Worker Label:: W O R K A H O L I C
I love my job, I get to sit in my own studio all day and do artist contracts for people, or I get to practice my dance, I get to travel the world dancing, and I get to travel the world taking pictures. I have my dream job and I work hard at it every day I can. But I'm self employeed, I have my own art buisness, and I make a lot of money doing my art, but I also work 84 hours a week, and I do all the work myself with no other people helping except occasionally my best friend. I hardly get vacation, because vacation means no money, no money means no way to pay the bills. So I work, a lot. I hardly ever am not working, I sometimes crash at my studio for the night, I don't have a social life thanks to my job, if it wasn't for my boyfriend, I probably would never spend an hour away from work. But he helps regulate my scheduale a bit.
Style:: G I R L Y
Typical Wear:: C L A S S Y
Fashion Sense:: T R E N D Y
Ability:: E L E G A N T . F U N
My style is unique, I'm a girly girl, I am a dress person, and a heel person, I enjoy dressing myself up and wearing pretty things. I can be tom boy type label at time though, but most time I'm a girly girl. A girl that enjoys the latest trends and fashions, a girl that could spend all day shopping. A girl who has to many clothes and shoes. I'm also hair and makeup obsessed, I always have makeup on, you will never see me without makeup on, and my hair... I obsess over my hair, it either has to be perfect, or perfect as a messy style. I prefer the very classy and elegant look, I see no point in dressing like a skank unless I want to, I have my ears peirced twice. That is all, and I have two tattoos, a butterfly on my lower back, and a rose on my ankle that can be hidden if I want. I plan to one day be able to not care, but I do care, I am incredibly insecure, I freak out and worry about pointless things I really shouldn't be caring about, but I can't help it. My looks are about the only thing I can count on to behave if I want them to, I need to be noticed, being noticed by 'She is cute' helps my insecuritys.
Confession:: B U Y . 2 . M A N Y . S H O E S
Addiction:: C I G A R E T T E S
Religion:: A T H I E S T
Obsessions:: M O V I E S & T W I T T E R
Random Fact:: W E A R S . C O N T A C T S
Most Owned Object:: B R A C E L E T S
Yes I have a confession, I buy to many shoes. I can't help it I'm a girl. All girls like shoes don't they? I'm rather ashamed to honestly admit to my confession about shoes, but considering I currently have 30 pairs of JUST six inch pumps I can honestly confess to this. But I like shoes, they complete an outfit. But surprisingly shoes aren't my largest supply of objects relating to accessories. I have a lot of bracelets, way to many for my own good I put admit but non the less quite a bit. I'm also admiting to an addiction, I like many other americans, am suffering threw the addiction to nicotine, but I don't see that as an issue to be honest, I don't want to quit. I like smoking, it gives me something else to spend money on. Its about the only commited thing I buy. One pack everyday. When it comes to my views of religion, I am an athiest, I beleive in science. Scientific reasons behind evolution and the world, I do not beleive some magical moron in the sky said bipity bobity boo and the world appeared. If there is a difference between addiction and obsession then I have two obessions other then shoes and cigarettes, I am obsessed with movies, I have random knowledge of movies and actors in movies, I watch way to many movies, and I am obsessed with twitter. I am always on twitter, constantly on twitter or watching movies when I have time. My obsessions are fairly abnormal, and random I know. Don't judge.
Dream:: S U C C E S S
Goal:: F I X.R E L A T I O N S H I P
Hope:: B E . R E M E M B E R E D
Reasoning:: P A S S I O N A T E
With everything in me I want success, I want my art known to the world, I want to be successful in life and have quality reasoning because I am a passionate person. I put my all into the things I love and want, whether it be the goal to fix my relationship I hope to be remembered. I want to go down in history as the artist who did. I really just want to be loved. I want my relationship fixed, I want someone who will support my hope for success. I really just want everything in my life to work out and go the way i want, I know that isn't a realistic goal, but I beleive it can go fairly well if I try hard enough. And I am trying, I am trying with everything I have in me. I want life to go well. Not awful.
Mother:: D E C E A S E D
Father:: D E C E A S E D
Brothers:: N O N E
Sisters:: E V I L . T W I N
Grandparents:: O N E
Aunts & Uncles:: N O N E
Cousins:: N O N E
Children:: H O P E F U L L Y
I have two living blood relatives, my twin sister who I wish was dead, and my grandfather, my mothers father to be exact. Either way, they aren't the supportive family everyone hopes for. Both of them have tried to kill me on numerous occasions. My grandfather is Russian, as if that doesn't say enough. But I have nothing against Russian's just the trained spys who are out seeking revenge and want to kill me. My mother was Russian, my father Italian, my mothers family were Russian spys, my fathers family was trainned assassins. So family reunions weren't really a typical thing, a family reunion in my family was a group fight as they all argued about wanting to have been the one to kill someone. Awe... Family love, there isn't any bond weaker is there? Its a shame really.
Animals:: F O U R
Favourite Animal:: D O G
Least Favourite Animal:: C A T
Type Owned:: D O G S
Breed Owned:: P I T B U L L S
Yes I fall innocent to loving the cute and cuddly, I am very addicted to dogs. I love them, they are so cute and I enjoy them. I am partially crazy when it comes to dogs though, constantly cursing that I'm stupid for having four. But I love all four of my dogs, they are the closest thing to kids I have. They entertain me, and they are just so cute, so I am perfectly content with my four pitbulls, two males, two females. The oldest a five year old male named Gus after Angus Young. 3 year old male named Ozzy after Ozzy Osbourne. 3 year old female named Amy after Amy Lee, and 2 year old Joan after Joan Jett. I have an issue with rock music overruling my life. So all four of my dogs are named after rockstars.
Political Views:: S C R E W . P O L I T I C S
World Views:: P E O P L E . A R E . I D I O T S
Places Traveled:: T O N N E S
Places Wanted to Go:: N O . W H E R E
Desired Honeymoon Place:: E N G L A N D
I'm not really a world caring type person, I care about my house, and as long as people don't interupt my house or me, I don't give a sh*t about what the world wants to do to screw us all over. I am perfectly content with just not caring, better to not get involved, then to admit to caring and giving the world satisfaction for your concerns. So I keep my mouth shut and let the world spin in a circle around a hot object 365 days a year. The world isn't my concern, I have been to different places all over the world multiple times, been to every continent including Antartica, I just don't see the point in traveling. I do want to revisit England though, hopefully my honeymoon destination. Nudge, nudge, hint, hint.
Personality in 5 Words::F U N N Y . C R A N K Y . M O O D Y .
U N P R E D I C T A B L E .
F U N
People are always scared to admit the truth of the world and the worlds flaws, when they see something that frightens them the initial reaction is to run. Some people run faster then others and some people just back away slowly but still try to flea the scene. The few people who actually have the guts to face their biggest fear and stand up for that fear are the ones that make it the farthest in life. I am the type to stand up and face me fears, I don't run from a battle I welcome them. Welcome them with big smiles and open arms. I allow my mind to take control of the situation and face my inner demons. I have never been one to have fears though, I was always taught that fears are for the weak and to stand up and fight anything that got in the way. So thats what I have grown immune to. Fighting. I'm a rather violent and moody girl, I knows when I can win and when I will most likley lose but I never pass up a fight. I works hard for what I beleive in and face fights and pick battles one by one, never biting off more then I can chew. When my mind is set to something it gets fulfilled. I works out and train but always have and will always have an eye for the things in life I shouldn't have.
When something appeals to her me I take it, no matter what it is I have her fun with it and then throw it aside. Thats where my flirty side comes in. I will flirt with a guy no matter who he may have in his arms, every man is my target and when a girlfriend starts to tell me to back off it only draws me closer to the prey. I alway takes down my prey though, whether its my sexy charm or self confidence that win or just her natural looks and thick accent. I will however admit that someday I will settle down... or so hopes. I really just want a normal everyday relationship. Someone to love and will love me back, someone who is willing to get past all the secrets and lies that build up my character. And someone who will be the type of man who will fight for me.
But despite dreams of one day meeting a decent man and settling down with him my mind is always still going to be sheltered and hard to reach. I don't trust people with any infomration, even my name and age are things I will gradually release over time. I know first hand what it is like to be hurt, hurt physically, hurt emotionally, and to be hurt mentally. No matter what happens to me though I still will never give up on the hope that someday I will find a man that will accepts all of the very tall and hard to pass barriers. And there are alot of barriers, I'm is like an onion you have to peel back layer by layer but there is a hell of a lot of layers to go through. If you hurt me in any way shape or form the layers practially fill back up and will shut you out. I have never been the type to offer second chances, I allow you to prove yourself worthy and depending on how worthy I beleive you are I may be willing to give you a shot, whether that be as a lover or as a friend.
Then again aside from the barriers I also shelter a rough and rigid edge. I am feisty and a royal pain in the a**. I have studied most things in life and has an excellent knowledge in most things, including human behaviour, my training as an assassin enabled me to profile a person on the spot. But thats not all, I can practically recite any histiorical event off by heart, its just a gift. I have a special ability not many have, its something that makes me an amazing assassin, I never forget anything. And thanks to that amazing talent I'm brilliant. But don't over estimate the goodness of this strength, it is also a tragedy, being unable to forget anything meaning every little detail and fact every seen or heard I will always remmeber, the good... and the bad... but also the horrible. I try my hardest to keep my mind wandering in most areas of social interaction and try not to observe unless required and often fleas bad situations I don't need to be in. I knows my strengths and weaknesses and use both to my best advantage meanwhile taking advantage of the target at hand. I am trained to see all things as a threat until proven otherwise and will not bow my head down in shame. Holding my head high and proud no matter how ashamed I may be and lying smoothly and swiftly without even a catch of a breath, every little skill and strength I can acquire is perfect for me.
I also have a talent for some normal human activitys though, passions lie with art and music, as well as dance. I can dance gracefully across a dance floor memorizing and replaying every little dance step with complete and utter accuracy just like I can guide my hand along a canvas or peice of paper as I draw or paint. My art work always ends up being a remarkable peice but never do anything with them, always stores them in the attic for safe keeping, to some day admire the scene that is caught in my head as is stuck drawing it. Art is something father had alwas pushed me to get into, even though it was my idea to have a passion for art, he figured that if I wanted to do art he mine as well coordinate it as a training technique somehow, but I didn't care, as long as it meant she got to do something I loved and put every bit of passion and energy into it I was fine. Dance was the same though, I loved dancing because it brought out my inner princess side, I had always been the type of person to admire beauty so dance was another brilliant way to exhibit beauty, I'm an elegant dancer and used that to advantage, and was pleased when father approved telling me it would help her with her balance and agility.
History in 1 Word:: Horrible
I don't talk about my past it is an off limit topic, but I will suck it up an explain my doing. So staring at birth I was born January first at 3:32am after being in my mothers womb for 8 months and 9 days. So I was an early baby, I was born in Italy in a private hospital no one really knows exists. I was kept in the hospital for two hours before my parents took me home against the doctors word. I had a twin sister who was born five minutes before me and never let it slide, when we got to my fathers house my grandfather was there. He had never approved of my mother being pregnant, my mother had been engaged to be married to another man because of an arranged marriage since birth. But she met my father and had an affair with him, when she found out she was pregnant her father tried to make her abort the child but my mother ran away with my father and they hid in England to protect their unborn children. But my grandfather somehow found out and killed my mother, my father fled with me and my sister and gave us to our uncle and aunt, but our uncle has an armsdealer, our aunt a drug dealer, so they abused us majorly, our uncle sexually abused us aswell. When we were one they relaized we were to much of a problem so they tossed us away and a guy found us taking us to Russia where we were put on the market, since we were one we were pawned around to different men being seperated from one another, she found a nice family but I was touched every night by strange men and hit by the men and the women, so finally I ended up pawned off in america and I was put for adoption but I went from foster home to fost home being touched and hit daily. When I was ten my father found me and stayed in America with me, but he disapeared one night and I was delivered his head. So it was foster home after foster home agin, when I was 12 I knew school was starting to reach the important years so I reached a foster home and I sucked it up, I didn't complain about the touching or the hitting, I staying in one place for three years then when I was sixteen I went to court to become a legal adult and I was granted. So I moved to California started going to a fine arts school and became a ward of the state under my own protection, getting paid for schooling and my basic needs. I sucked everything up moved on with my life, worked my a** of during highschool saving money, then I started my own art buisness when I graduated highschool and exceled to where I am now.
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